Chapter 5: Debris Road

             Rogue sighed, staring into space at her bedroom wall, she was lying on her bed, Kitty sitting there, it was five hours later, and Rogue was still unable to speak about it to Kitty – despite she knew Kitty was the only person in the world she really could trust.

             Kitty wished Rogue would just tell her what had happened instead of bottling it all up, instead, she stayed by Rogue as any friend would do.

             "I can't believe he's going to marry her…" Rogue said, her eyes still unfocused on anything, her lips dry and chapped.

             Kitty sighed, "You shouldn't worry about it…you do this to yourself all the time, Rogue.  You keep going back down debris road…"

             Rogue sat up slowly, "Hmm?" She asked.

             "Debris Road, I don't know, it was a song I used to like a few years back…debris road, is kind of like…I don't know, a road where you keep going back on your past, and seeing all the damage it caused you, and you keep reliving it cos you can't come to term with it," Kitty shrugged.  "But you should just try and move forward now…" Kitty sighed.  "Move on from Remy…you have bigger problems."

             Rogue nodded, she supposed Kitty was right, but still…there was something in the back of her mind that said she couldn't move on from Remy, despite she'd told him she was over him, she was definitely far from over him, and despite the thought of being near him, or any other man, right now made her cringe, she wanted to be with him, and tell him so.

             "But you're not going to move on from him, are you?" Kitty asked.

             Rogue shook her head, "I can't…" she felt more tears coming, and wiped them away, "I hate him and I love him all at once and I want to move on, but I can't…" she sighed, "I've just been raped, and all I care about is tellin' him not to go…" she sighed.

             Kitty looked at him, "You sure you wanna see him right now?  I mean, I saw him when I sent him to his room, he looked pretty cut up, Rogue…You do too…"

             "I need to see him…" Rogue sighed she got up slowly, wincing in the pain, "and tell him I love him…"

             Kitty sighed, "I'm here for you if you need me…" she stood up also.

             Rogue drew a breath, trying to keep from sobbing again, Kitty's friendship touched her far more than it ever had before, she thrust herself into Kitty's arm, and hugged her fiercely, their cheeks slightly touching.

             Kitty rubbed Rogue's back.  "I'm ALWAYS here for you," she sighed.

             Rogue kissed Kitty's cheek, taking advantage that her powers would not harm her, "thanks," she murmured, "for always bein' there when I need you…you're…you're the only person alive I really…truly…trust," She feigned a smile, then left the room.

             She headed downstairs, Remy's room door was closed, she knocked, then opened it.  Remy was lying on his bed, asleep, his face tearstained.  She sighed, she'd hoped he'd be awake.  She entered the room, and closed the door behind herself, she walked over and sat on the bed beside him, looking down at him. 

Despite she'd been through considerably more than he had throughout their relationship, she couldn't bring herself to wake him through his troubled sleep.  She ran her bare fingers across his cheek lightly, a tear of her own dribbled down her cheek, and fell upon his own cheek, she wiped it away with her thumb, sighing.

She asked God, in her thoughts, why it couldn't have just worked out like it does for normal people.  It seemed that they were to receive ten times as many troubles as any other normal person on the planet.  Was this a punishment for being a genetic freak?  A mutant?  Or was it a punishment because they were never meant to be together?

Rogue stroked Remy's hair, relished its softness under her fingers.  She sighed and lay on the bed beside him, huddling up against him, resting her head upon his cheek, wishing then he would awaken and hold her.  But he didn't, he slept soundly, and she lay against him, relishing the warmth of his body, curling his hair between her slim bare fingers, and soon, she was drifting off too, into a deep, restful sleep.

When Remy LeBeau awoke, he was not alone in his room – nor in his bed.  The girl he loved draped over him, her head upon his chest, she slept more soundly than he'd ever seen her sleep, her fingers curled around his hair.  He brushed her hair away from her face, glancing down at her.  He didn't understand anymore.

She said she was over him, yet so obviously wasn't.  Now things were more complicated, he'd told Bella Donna he'd marry her – there were consequences.  He had to live up to the responsibility – just as he did with his child. 

             But now, the love of his life was in his arms – where she should have been all along.  He wrapped his arms around her, and for that few moments, everything in his life came together, he brushed his bare fingers against her cheek, no powers affecting either of them, just the contact of velvety skin under his callused fingers. 

             This is how it's meant to be, he thought sadly, me holding her like this, with nothing to keep us apart…

             But he knew that it would never last, it never did.  The few times he'd been privileged to hold her in this way, it had never lasted long.  And he wondered if he simply held on forever, would she want to pull away?

             Rogue's eyes fluttered open at his touch across her face, and she raised her head, looking at him, slightly confused as to where she was for a moment, then she looked at him, the memories of what she'd been through flashing back into her mind instantly, and tears spilled.

             He wiped her tears away, beginning to become dewy eyed himself, "don't cry," he murmured, "I can't bear to see you cry…"

             Rogue pressed her face against his chest, and sobbed into him, he rubbed her shoulders, stroked her hair, and let her, "I'm sorry," she let out a heart wrenching sob, that broke him into tears too.  "I'm so…sorry…"

             Remy blinked, tears spilling down the sides of his face from where he lay, "you got nothin' to be sorry for, chere," he whispered, "nothin' to be sorry for," he held her close, tears still pouring.

             "I made you cry…" she sobbed, looking at him, tears trickling.

             "Only 'cause I'm feelin' your pain," he sobbed, blinking more tears, "I'd rather die a million times…and burn in hell for all eternity, than to know you suffered a minute of what you did…" he cried.

             Rogue sat up, up, but the tears still came, she pressed her hand to her mouth looking down at him, he was a wreck.  She'd never seen him cry in this way, she'd seen a tear or two, but nothing like this, nothing so shattering.  He turned away from her, he couldn't bear to look at her anymore, and he couldn't bear her seeing his tears anymore. 

             He lay so exposed to her, and all it would take was one word to finalise her feelings for him, if she told him she didn't love him, he would surely die, and if he didn't, if his heartbreak didn't kill him, then he'd find another method of death, for he couldn't live an instant longer being so effected by the emotions he could no longer control over the girl he'd die for.

             "Remy, I'm not over you…" Rogue sobbed, "I thought I was…but…I can't be without you…and I need you with me…I need your arms, I need you to hold me, and tell me its gonna be alright…because if you don't…if you go with Bella Donna…I'll die…" Rogue looked at him, "my heart might just break and my chest will cave in and die, I know it sounds so dramatic…" she sobbed.

             Remy turned, tears pouring, he looked at her, "but its how I really feel," he said, in unison with her as she said the same words, "no I feel it too…" he murmured, he took her hands, "chere…I feel it too…don't you see…we are meant to be together…"

             Rogue fell into his arms crying, "we are…"