"He sleeps in the cupboard?" The high pitched and rather snotty voice of
the Family Welfare Officer from the Ministry of Magic asked my scared and
shaking aunt. I was to be the first evaluated by the new department. With
the death of Voldermort I think they were hoping on declaring my muggles
wonderful role models, followed by perhaps removing Malfoy from his pure
blood mother and her 'bad influence'. Telling the community that Voldemorts
ideals were not upheld in the government after so many followers turned out
to be high ranking officers at the ministry.
"No!" My aunt cried out in uncertain indignation. Her eyes were huge with fear and a vein in her neck was pulsing every few seconds. Long and spindly fingers wrapped around a handkerchief trying to squeeze the life from it. The little sneak-a-scope attacked to the officers clip board shone red and my aunt tried desperately to think of an answer that would not see her family locked away. A fine layer of sweat building on her brow as she slowly turned an unhealthy yellow. "Well. . . yes, but he's. . . you see the thing you have to understand is that, well. . ." But before she could think of an appropriate way of describing my many inadequacies the large form of Uncle Vernon pushed itself sideways through the door from the kitchen. Holding his considerable girth up with both hands and grunting through the already enlarged door frame in the most ridicules of manners despite the pompous look in his eye. He truly believed that blubber roll was the epitome of everything manly and good. "He'd a ruddy FREAK! That's what that boy is! And I won't have his freakishness sullying my home! Sullying my family!" His head shook with the effort of speaking, slight spittle flying every which way in a manner reminiscent of his sisters beloved bull dogs. Surely the Dursley family had bread with the mutts at some point to bare such a striking resemblance? His breathing was deep and audible, face reddening slowly as if to threaten all present with a most spectacular heart attack at any moment. Beady eyes narrowed in suspicion as his piggy little brain finally registered that this woman was most likely a 'freak' too.
The officer raised an eyebrow and made a note on her clipboard while enunciating in a clear voice "Imprisonment in a small space. Verbal abuse. Demeaning behaviour, and," Her eyes raising to look at Uncle Vernons middle with a disgusted snarl she spat out the last, "Possibly plan on eating him." Vernon bristled visibly as the officer reattached her pencil to the clipboard and made her way into the lounge, completely ignoring now greenish coloured woman and her almost purple husband. No doubt she thought they suffered from some kind of mood ring magic, but she did not mention it and if she thought I had cursed them illegally she made no comment of it. No doubt believing they disserved just as much. She reminded me of a scientist studying another species. Her out stretched neck craning to see every nook and cranny as if she might find a nesting area behind a couch. A kind of animal collection of shiny things behind the refrigerator. Maybe even proof that they wallowed underneath the kitchen table. She seemed unwilling to touch anything; clearly she felt it would be wrong to upset the habitat.
A few more notes latter and she was climbing the steps. When she reached the middle of the stair case and heard an offending creak, she froze in apparent shock. Slowly stepping back onto it once or twice to be sure it was actually faulty she then turned her head to glare menacingly at my relatives. As if this step were the worse of their short comings. She pulled her pencil from it's frame with a small snapping noise and spoke out loud at she wrote in chicken scratch handwriting "Inadequate household maintenance" and glared once again at the shocked couple, daring them to contest her assessment. Then made her way to the second floor. To be honest I thought it was a stretch, but perhaps she had already made her decision and wanted to be sure it was indisputable by collecting an abundance of evidence. Well worded offences for even the slightest of things.
The next day I was given over to the school, or more appropriately, I was given over to Dumbledores guardianship. The reason for it made me bristle with anger. He was my actually legal guardian. After Sirius my parents wanted me placed with him, and in his manipulative and stupid old man way he decided to place me in little whining instead. But he insisted he was a very busy man. Much to many responsibilities to undertake my care as well. He twinkled at me like a Christmas tree on fire and made quite the show of allowing me to pick any teacher I wanted to live with. Their quarters all in the school and themselves all apparently living here for lack of anywhere better to go. The life of a boarding school teacher had never seemed more lonely and depressing. I chose Hagrid straight away. And this is were my adventure began. Who knew what I was to expect. . . certainly I would never see any of my teachers in the same light again.
"No!" My aunt cried out in uncertain indignation. Her eyes were huge with fear and a vein in her neck was pulsing every few seconds. Long and spindly fingers wrapped around a handkerchief trying to squeeze the life from it. The little sneak-a-scope attacked to the officers clip board shone red and my aunt tried desperately to think of an answer that would not see her family locked away. A fine layer of sweat building on her brow as she slowly turned an unhealthy yellow. "Well. . . yes, but he's. . . you see the thing you have to understand is that, well. . ." But before she could think of an appropriate way of describing my many inadequacies the large form of Uncle Vernon pushed itself sideways through the door from the kitchen. Holding his considerable girth up with both hands and grunting through the already enlarged door frame in the most ridicules of manners despite the pompous look in his eye. He truly believed that blubber roll was the epitome of everything manly and good. "He'd a ruddy FREAK! That's what that boy is! And I won't have his freakishness sullying my home! Sullying my family!" His head shook with the effort of speaking, slight spittle flying every which way in a manner reminiscent of his sisters beloved bull dogs. Surely the Dursley family had bread with the mutts at some point to bare such a striking resemblance? His breathing was deep and audible, face reddening slowly as if to threaten all present with a most spectacular heart attack at any moment. Beady eyes narrowed in suspicion as his piggy little brain finally registered that this woman was most likely a 'freak' too.
The officer raised an eyebrow and made a note on her clipboard while enunciating in a clear voice "Imprisonment in a small space. Verbal abuse. Demeaning behaviour, and," Her eyes raising to look at Uncle Vernons middle with a disgusted snarl she spat out the last, "Possibly plan on eating him." Vernon bristled visibly as the officer reattached her pencil to the clipboard and made her way into the lounge, completely ignoring now greenish coloured woman and her almost purple husband. No doubt she thought they suffered from some kind of mood ring magic, but she did not mention it and if she thought I had cursed them illegally she made no comment of it. No doubt believing they disserved just as much. She reminded me of a scientist studying another species. Her out stretched neck craning to see every nook and cranny as if she might find a nesting area behind a couch. A kind of animal collection of shiny things behind the refrigerator. Maybe even proof that they wallowed underneath the kitchen table. She seemed unwilling to touch anything; clearly she felt it would be wrong to upset the habitat.
A few more notes latter and she was climbing the steps. When she reached the middle of the stair case and heard an offending creak, she froze in apparent shock. Slowly stepping back onto it once or twice to be sure it was actually faulty she then turned her head to glare menacingly at my relatives. As if this step were the worse of their short comings. She pulled her pencil from it's frame with a small snapping noise and spoke out loud at she wrote in chicken scratch handwriting "Inadequate household maintenance" and glared once again at the shocked couple, daring them to contest her assessment. Then made her way to the second floor. To be honest I thought it was a stretch, but perhaps she had already made her decision and wanted to be sure it was indisputable by collecting an abundance of evidence. Well worded offences for even the slightest of things.
The next day I was given over to the school, or more appropriately, I was given over to Dumbledores guardianship. The reason for it made me bristle with anger. He was my actually legal guardian. After Sirius my parents wanted me placed with him, and in his manipulative and stupid old man way he decided to place me in little whining instead. But he insisted he was a very busy man. Much to many responsibilities to undertake my care as well. He twinkled at me like a Christmas tree on fire and made quite the show of allowing me to pick any teacher I wanted to live with. Their quarters all in the school and themselves all apparently living here for lack of anywhere better to go. The life of a boarding school teacher had never seemed more lonely and depressing. I chose Hagrid straight away. And this is were my adventure began. Who knew what I was to expect. . . certainly I would never see any of my teachers in the same light again.