(Sunday morning; Tino's house)
Tish: I can't believe I'm doing this again!
(Knocks on the door)
T Mom: Hi Tish! Tino went over to Lor's house.
Tish: Hi Mrs. Tonitini. I wasn't looking for him.
T Mom: Oh I see. Come in!
Tish: Mrs. Tonitini, I require a SEC.
T Mom: Please sit down. Your session of emotional counseling has started.
Tish: Thank you. I... I've been felling unusually lonely those days...
T Mom: Have you tried talking about it with someone you know?
Tish: I did... but at this level, communications were inhibited by the lack of a common language.
T Mom: Why don't you write about it then?
Tish: What if this someone wrote really badly?
T Mom: You tried to talk about feelings with Carver?
Tish: What's wrong with that?!?
T Mom: He's not exactly a deep-feelings kinda guy...
Tish: Yeah I noticed some of that... I guess that was foolish...
T Mom: Don't make a verdict on the first try!
Tish: What can I do?
T Mom: How about you get some weight off your mind right now?
Tish: ...Well, ok... It started sometime between Tino's trip and yesterday... They really seem to feel something strong for each other and I started feeling that I want that to happen to me but I can't seem to find anyone who really understands me... I don't even know what it is that I want to hear myself!
T Mom: I see type-C misunderstanding-related depression.
Tish: I would say type-B at least; I really feel lousy... How do I make the world understand me without effort?
T Mom: Hey! If I knew how to do that, I would be rich!
Tish: So am I bound to feel this way?
T Mom: Tish, you have to learn to trust yourself and be yourself... there's no way you can find the right things that easy, but there is someone right for everyone; you are smart, pretty, talented, and you have those cute little tempers that make you so unique! I can't see how you could be doing badly...
Tish: Do I have to pay to hear this?
T Mom: Tish, I'm sincere! I can't make it stop; you can. In fact I doubt the solution to your problem is that far! You might just want to understand other people better before thinking they don't understand you at all...
Tish (she smiles): Really?
T Mom: Hey! Haven't you heard? When a parent lies about feelings, she turns into stone.
Tish: Thank you so much! I feel much better. Is there a way I can express my gratitude?
T Mom: Well, I'm kind of worried about Tino and this whole tough guy thing; I don't want him to feel bad but I don't want him to get hurt either... How about you help me with that?
Tish: Don't you worry ma'am! It will be a matter of minutes...
T Mom: And I have the odd feeling you owe him five dollars...
Tish: Hehe! Of course...
(Sunday Afternoon; Lor's house; Tino is getting a fake tattoo on his arm and Carver is reading its notice)
Tino: Are you sure this is not permanent?
Carv: Of course! ...it says here you can remove it by medical operation any day!
(Tish gets in)
Tish: If nothing works in five minutes, I'll intervene!
Lor: YOU want to help Tino get tough?!?
Tish: Drastic situations require drastic solutions...
Carv: The tattoo takes ten minutes to dry...
Tish: Then let's go! The equipment is already set.
Tino: I have a bad feeling about this!
Tish: Oh don't worry! You guys know me; I promote pacifism after all!
(Tish's backyard; there are fighting dummies around; the gang is in kimono)
Tino: Pacifism eh? Well, that makes sense: Tish, the Shakespeare fan, the dulcimer player and the martial-art expert...
Tish: First lesson of Tai-Kwan-Judo, salute your opponent!
(She bows down)
Lor: You mean he's got to say hi to that guy before he tears him into shreds?
Tish: It's called respect!
Carv: He's got to pay respects that guy before he gets beaten up?
Tish: NO! Oh! You know what, just forget I said that! Basic combat response methods: Tino, try to push me down.
Tino: Are you sure?
Tish: Don't worry; you won't hurt m... aoww!
(Tino pushes Tish; she falls)
Tish: Hey! I wasn't ready! ... (She gets up) Ok, now try again!
(Tino tries to push Tish; Tish grabs a hand and throws Tino on the other side; Tino's head lands on a garden flamingo and breaks it)
Tino: Owie! Head hurts... Seeing birds...
Lor: Wow Tish! That was amazing! I never thought you were actually...
Tino: You know, my head didn't do anything to you Tish!
Tish: There is more than what meets the eye!
Tino: Great! Now all I need is to tell this guy to warn me to be ready before he attacks me...
Tish: It takes a lot of practice to master this art, but once you are done, no one can surprise you anymore.
Carv: Cool! That's like in that movie... (Imitates actor voice) You have dishonored my dog! You must pay!
Tino: Yeah well, I don't exactly have time for "a lot of practice".
Tish: I've though about that too and made this short laminated guide of basic self-defense in 3 lessons... you should be ready in a couple of hours!
Carv: Tish, you never cease to amaze us!
Tino: Ok, I'll give that shot... But get me some bandage first; I just lost 5% of my brain capacity in this impact.
(Five minutes later; Tino is painting fences)
Tino: Ok, can you please tell me why I'm painting your fences?
Tish: It's developing your anterior arm muscles and you training you for a block move!
Tino: Really? Gee, I really wonder why I have to do that by painting your fence!
(An hour later; Tino is washing cars)
Tino: I feel you want to explain me why I'm shining your car?
Tish: You are training your shoulders and extending your endurance!
Tino: Of course... I wonder why I couldn't see that...
(An hour later; Tino is trying to catch a fly with chopsticks)
Tino: Just let me guess; you're training my reflexes and dexterity, right?
Tish: No actually, I've been trying to catch this one for some time.
Tino: Arr! Well why the chopsticks then?
Tish: You've been doing so well I figured you would finish before time so...
Tino: And I thought I'd seen everything about you...
(Sunday night; Tish's door)
Lor: I'll help Tino to his house... I think he needs a therapy after this kind of training.
Tino: ...head hurts... seeing stars... and flies
(She helps Tino on her shoulders and leaves)
Carv: Tish?
Tish: Yes Carver?
Carv: I... we got to talk... you know yesterday when you told me about feelings and stuff?
Tish: ...Alright, you win! How much do you want?
Carv: No! No no no no... No! I really mean it! I... I've been thinking! I did get you when you were saying that stuff but I guess I was just too proud to admit I could have this kind of feelings too... I mean I'm a guy and there are so many unwritten rules about guys stipulating this is lame and forbidding me to even listen... Look, what I'm trying to say is I've been a jerk and I... I...
Tish: Yes! Say it! Say it!
Carv: ...I'm sorry!
Tish: Yes! He does have a heart!
Carv: ...And I'll make it up to you; I'll keep you company whatever that means.
Tish: Oh Carver, this is the nicest thing ever you've said! How can I be mad at you now?
Carv: So you forgive me?
Tish: As long as you pay my lunch back...
Carv: Consider it done! ...next weekend; my wallet's on diet right now...
(Monday afternoon; outside Bahia Bay middle school)
(The high school bully is pushing around some younger kids near the gym)
Lor: So, you're ready for this?
Tino: Sure, I've eaten blowfish and wore criminal evidence, I'm ready for anything!
Carv: It does feel a lot different when the guy's actually here!
Tish: He'll be fine, trust me! It's not about the physical part anymore.
Bully (sees them and approaches): So, back for some more?
Lor: Like you can play anyone without cheating.
Bully: Oh I'll show you how I cheat!
Tino (gets in between): Just leave her alone!
Bully: Well well well, look who's found out how to use his tongue!
Tino: Look who's recovered from his constipation!
Bully: What did you say?
Tino: Oh, I'm sorry! Let me translate that into stupid; Get away from us!
Bully: Careful of what you're sayin' Tonitini! You're talking to a real man here!
Tino: That would be an awful insult to all mankind, wouldn't it?
(The bully grabs Tino's shirt; Tino grabs his hands and gets them off; the bully is surprised)
Tino: This place is big; go get lost somewhere else.
Bully: Like I want to stay with you suckers... it could be contagious.
Tino: Yeah love you too jerkface!
(He goes away; Tino turns around and comes back to normal)
Lor: Woow! I've seen it... but I still can't believe it!
Carv: Yeah! What are you doing man? You could have kicked his bottom! Even Tish can take him... He was just a family size chicken!
Lor/Tish: Carver!
Lor: That's an awful thing to say for chickens!
Tino: Sorry guys, but I won't be the one to start a fight. It takes more to refuse violence than to allow it to take you over... and I have interests in not getting hurt today.
Tish: ...And he finally understands the concept of respect! It wasn't easy... but he did it!
Carv: Well, that and her mom will post that picture on the web.
Tino: Hey maybe it didn't look like it but I did a lot of bluffing back there! I was gonna faint if it lasted any longer...
Lor: Do you think it was worth it?
Tino: For you, I'd get beaten up wearing that jacket on a snowy day repeatedly every day.
(She kisses him)
Tino: Ahem! Public place! People around! Blood rising in my face!
Lor: Who cares?
Tino: Not me!
(He kisses her)
Lor: See you tomorrow, hero!
Tino: My name's Tino... Oh! You heard that? She called me a hero! ... (He imitates air guitar)
Carv: Seen enough?
Tish: ...Ok fine! You win!
(Tish gives five bucks to Carver; Lor goes back home; Tino knocks himself on a stop sign while doing his thing)
Tino: Aouch! Head hurts... Seeing bells and stop signs...
Carv: Oh man! He had to do that now!
Tish: You did say "if he gets hurt..."
Carv: Fine...
(Carver gives money back to Tish)
Tish: Come to mama!
(Tino comes)
Tino: Hey Tish! Nice Abraham Lincoln!
Tish: Hehe... Here! Sorry.
(She gives him the five bucks)
(Apart)
Tino: Hey everyone! So that wasn't so bad you would think, right? Well, think that again and harder and one more time if you have to! I would eat another Fugu fish liver before I do this again! Seriously, I still can't feel my legs right now... Oh well, I'll live a couple minutes less I guess... The others also got their lessons; Carver has learned that speaking of feelings doesn't make you uncool and Tish found out she's not an emotionally desperate case... far from that. Oh and I also learned one thing: never get a tattoo before being sure it's not permanent... especially when it's a bunny! Ok! Later Days!
THE END
Pour Elodie. Soie bénie ou que tu puisses être.