A/N: ER with music, who woulda thunk it? This has almost defiantly been done before. But, the idea is pretty universal, so I'm using it. My songs are original. I didn't copy anybody. But, if you feel I have, tell me and I will give credit where credit is due. Things in bold are actions.
It's hard to rewrite entire songs. So please, reviews are greatly appreciated. It works best if you sing along with the songs.
Rating: G
Spoilers: None
Disclaimer: Do I look like I own anything? Darn straight. The songs are as follows:
~*~*~*
Dancing Queen: ABBA
Wannabe: Spice Girls
Girls just wanna have fun: Cyndi Lauper
Come on Over: Shania Twain
I'm not a girl, not yet a woman: Britney Spears
If you don't know the song, try looking it up on the internet to see the real words. Then sing along with the fake ones. It's fun. I tried
Chapter Two.
Elizabeth: We have a trauma coming in by flight. Dr. Gallant, Dr. Chen and Dr. Lewis, you guys are needed. Romano, you're needed in surgery.
Romano: It's about time!
So, Susan, Jing-Mei and Gallant leave for the roof.
On the way to the roof, Pratt catches up with them.
Pratt: Whatcha doing?
Susan: We're going up to the roof to get a trauma victim.
Pratt's ears perk up. Trauma.
Pratt: Um, erm, do you need anybody else? A doctor?
Susan: Don't think so.
Pratt: A handsome one who's name begins with P and is 5 letters long?
Susan: …potato?
Pratt: That's six letters.
Gallant: …plume?
Pratt:…Nooo
Jing-Mei: plead?
Pratt: It rhymes with rat
Susan: …Pat?
Pratt: No, you idiots! ME! ME! P-R-A-T-T! Pratt! Doctor Pratt!
Susan: You're a doctor?
Pratt: YES! I WANT THE TRAUMA!
Jing-Mei: Chill out, Pratt.
Gallant: We're just messing with you.
Susan: You are such a drama queen!
Jing-Mei: …or Trauma Queen!
There is a piano run, and then the music starts. The lights dim, a disco ball comes magically from the sealing. Gallant plays the piano like a pro. Susan and Jing-Mei seem to have rhythm.
Jing-Mei: See the blood, grab the knife; you want to save every life,
Oh oh oh, see that guy; he's so mean, dig in the Trauma Queen!
Susan: Friday night, and you're on a shift
Feeling sad, you need a lift
You want to find the right person, a bloody one is fine
You're here anytime
Jing-Mei: Anybody could be that guy
ETA is almost nigh
With a bit of self-righteousness, you're a little snide
You're in the mood for some fun
And when you hear that gun….
Both: You are a Trauma Queen, tart not sweet, only one of your team
Trauma Queen, feel the heat from this patients spleen (Oh EW!)
See the blood, grab the knife; you want to save every life,
Oh oh oh, see that guy; he's so mean, dig in the Trauma Queen!
Susan: You're in for a law suit, you foolish pig
Leave them bleeding right on the rig
Looking out for another, an MI is good
You'd get 'em all if you could
And when you see the blood….
Both: You are a Trauma Queen, tart not sweet, only one of your team
Trauma Queen, feel the heat from this patients spleen (Oh EW!)
See the blood, grab the knife; you want to save every life,
Oh oh oh, see that guy; he's so mean, dig in the Trauma Queen!
Susan: Dig in the Trauma Queen!
The lights go back to normal. The elevator dings, and Susan and Jing-Mei step inside. Gallant tries, but Pratt pushes in front of him.
Pratt: Sorry, Mikey, but this is for me!
Gallant: I was called to work on this.
Pratt: Yeah, well, you know what they say….Dig in the Trauma Queen! Hee hee, that's catchy. Up we go.
The elevator closes in front of Gallant, who looks like a lost puppy. But not for long, because Elizabeth comes strolling by.
Elizabeth: What's wrong, Gallant?
Gallant (whimpering): Pratt's a big meanie!
Elizabeth: Why's that?
Gallant: He stole my Trauma! I guess, cause I'm just a med-student (pretend this is before season ten)
Elizabeth: Well, If you want to be a doctor, you've got to toughen up.
Gallant: I do?
Elizabeth: You do.
Shirley comes rushing by. Some music seems to start up. I see Vic, (remember him?) under a gurney with a stereo. Elizabeth grabs Shirley.
Elizabeth: Yo, I'll tell you what
I want, what I really really want,
Shirley: So tell me what you want, what you really really want
Elizabeth: I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
Shirley: So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
Elizabeth: I wanna,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
really really wanna get this guy tough
Elizabeth: If you want a future,
like for healthcare,
Shirley: If you wanna get degrees, you better
learn what's fair
Elizabeth: Now don't go wasting this learning time,
Shirley: Get your act together and you will be just fine
Elizabeth: I'll tell you what I
want, what I really really want:
Shirley: So tell me what you want, what you really really
want,
Elizabeth: I wanna,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
really really wanna get get this guy tough.
Both: If you wanna be a doctor, you have to grow
some skin,
Make it last forever, Then Pratt will never win,
If you wanna be a doctor, you have got to treat,
Try and use your senses, or your patients are dead meat.
Elizabeth: What you think about
that, now you know how to heal,
Shirley: But this is just some advice, do it for
real,
Elizabeth: I won't be hasty, But
you've gotta learn fast
Shirley: If you do the wrong things, then you will not pass.
Elizabeth: Yo
I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
Shirley: So tell me what you want, what you really really
want,
Elizabeth:I wanna,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
really really wanna get this guy tough.
Both: If you wanna be a doctor, you have to grow
some skin,
Make it last forever, Then Pratt will never win,
If you wanna be a doctor, you have got to treat,
Try and use your senses, or your patients are dead meat.
Elizabeth: So here's a story bout a guy named Mike
He was just a student, that little tyke
We got Pratt in the place; he's always in your face
We got me and Shirley we're teaching you to
Feel free, just don't let it be, Pratt's a real pain
And now you'll see, his stunts are lame
Slam his body down and punch him in the face,
Slam his body down and punch him in the face,.
Both: If you wanna be a doctor, you have to grow
some skin,
Make it last forever, Then Pratt will never win,
If you wanna be a doctor, you have got to treat,
Try and use your senses, or your patients are dead meat.
If you wanna be a doctor, you gotta, you gotta, you gotta, you gotta, you gotta treat, treat, treat, treat,
Slam his body down and punch him in the face,
Slam his body down and punch him in the face,.
Slam his body down and punch him in the face,
Slam his body down and punch him in the face,.
If you wanna be doctor!
Vic stops the music and runs away. Elizabeth and Shirley stop singing. Gallant looks like a changed person.
Gallant: So, next time I see Pratt…
Elizabeth: Punch him in the face!
Gallant: YAY! Okay
Elizabeth and Shirley high five each other. Yes, Pratt will be put back in line. Suddenly, Randi comes rushing in.
Randi: There's a GSW on the way, ETA 5 minutes. Can you guys take it?
Elizabeth: Certainly. Lets go, Gallant. Shirley, why don't you come too?
Shirley: I'm not a trauma nurse, but hey, why not?
They all rush away, happy to be doing something. Randi sighs. Frank comes tumbling by.
Frank: Hey Randi, there's a stack of paper work for you to do on the front desk!
Randi: Why me?
Frank: Because your young and able-bodied. Oh, and it's my donut break!
Randi nods, knowing that Frank should not be separated from his donuts. But there's still a stack of paper work. Randi goes to the desk, looking wistful. On account of this is a musical, Jerry is there, and he asks her what's wrong. Vic senses a musical vibe and plugs in the Microphone just in time.
Randi: I come here, in the morning light
And Weaver yells 'when you gonna get the time right?"
What's that I hear, a trauma coming in one?
Man, my job's just no fun
Oh Man, this phone weighs a ton!
The phone rings, in the middle of the night
A doctor yells "we have got a trauma by flight!"
Oh doctor dear, there's a call on line one
GAWD, this job's just no fun!
Oh darn, Frank took the last bun!
Now all I really want
Is some fun
When my working day has begun
Geez, this job's no fun!
And now, there's a man with a gun!
Some docs think this job is so great
They complain so much about their jobs that they hate!
I hate to be the one to tell them they're wrong
But hey, my job is no fun!
Yeah right, my job is no fun!
Now all I really want
Is some fun
When my working day has begun
Geez, this job's no fun!
No no, this job is no fun….
The phone rings. Randi obediently picks it up. It's for Dr. Carter.
Randi: Carter? Where is he? Carter!
Carter's outside. He's bored. He wants action. He is a doctor, after all. Vic is on the scene. There will now be excitement.
Some country music starts, and rather then being scared of it, Carter starts singing to it.
Carter: Loose your life, split your lip
Fall down somewhere, try and trip
Get a break, in your arm
If a part of you is harmed
Come on over, come on in
Go stand in line, soon you'll be fine
Come on over, come on in
You might not die, to save you we'll try
Break a dish, on your head
Fall out of the tall bunk bed
When you're hurt, when you bleed
Want meds, whatever you need
Come on over, come on in
Go stand in line, soon you'll be fine
Come on over, come on in
You might not die, to save you we'll try
Oh, oh, oh
Be a guy, like you are
Jump in front of that car
Gotta be maimed, gotta be dead
Gotta go eat the paint with the lead
Come on over, come on in
Go stand in line, soon you'll be fine
Come on over, come on in
You might not die, to save you we'll try
Loose your life, split your lip
Fall down somewhere, try and trip
Get a break, in your arm
If a part of you is harmed
Come on over, come on in
Go stand in line, soon you'll be fine
Come on over, come on in
You might not die, to save you we'll try!
Carter finishes his song, and to his delight, he has attracted many people. They are all in need of medical care. He rushes the first one in, pausing to yell at Chuny and Abby.
Carter: Abby, Chuny, all the nurses! I'm going to need all your help here, so drop everything and come help me!
He races away to Trauma one. Abby, Chuny, and Connie sigh. Yeah, now Connie's there too.
Chuny: Can't they do anything themselves?
Abby: No, because they're doctors. They need super-healing powers that only the nurses have.
Surprise surprise, Vic is there with the right music.
Abby: I used to think
That doctors had answers to everything
But now I know
Nurses are the ones that make this place run
Feels like we're caught in a war-zone
That's when I realize…
I am a nurse
I'm not a doctor
All I need is praise
And maybe a raise
While I work these shifts
Chuny: I am a nurse
There is no need to ignore me
It's time that I get some respect of my own
I've seen so much more than the doctors
So tell it like it really is….
I am a nurse
I'm not a doctor
All I need is praise
And maybe a raise
While I work these shifts
Connie: I am a nurse
But when I look at them closely
I can see it in their eyes
This nurse will always find no respect
All: I am a nurse
I'm not a doctor
All I need is praise
And maybe a raise
While I work these shifts
The singing fades out. Vic dances a happy dance and scurries away. Abby, Connie and Chuny go off to find Carter and do their job.
*****
So, that's part two. There will be a part three. I promise. Stay tuned!
It took ages to write all these songs.
So, pretty please, review me.
It only takes a minute.
:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D