All Fanfics created by Chiruken (me) were written for the
sole purpose of shared entertainment and not intended for publication or sale.
Inuyasha Fanfic
WARNINGS: Warning for Inuyasha's potty mouth.
To Lose the One I LoveBy: Chiruken
Chapter 13
Throwing his head back, Inuyasha met her gaze directly, his pain obvious for the older woman to see. "I happened!" He jabbed a thumb towards his chest. "Just like every other time. I do somethin' to fuck things up and she leaves." He bowed his head and covered his face with his hands. "But this time I really messed it up, Kaede-babaa…she's never comin' back…and it's all my fault."
Kaede shook her head slowly. "Ahhh…I understand now." She stepped forward gingerly and looked down the well and blinked in surprise when she saw Kagome looking up at her and motioning for her to remain silent. Turning away quickly she glanced at the hanyou, wondering why his keen sense of smell hadn't picked up on the girl's scent yet. "Why don't you go and apologize, Inuyasha?"
"Keh." His ears seemed to droop even more. "I can't…" He spoke quietly, but the softly spoken words reached Kagome's ears at the bottom of the well. "I can't say the words she needs to hear, Kaede-babaa…" His head fell back with a thud against the wooden box surrounding the Bone Eater's Well. "I can't say 'em 'cause when the Shikon no Tama's complete she'll be goin' back to her time for good anyway…" He closed his eyes tightly. "It's better this way…"
"You don't sound convinced." The aging miko frowned down at him, feeling sorry for the obviously depressed hanyou despite her resolve to keep her heart hardened towards him.
"If I don't keep sayin' that, I will go after her…and she'll hate me for it." He looked up at the woman standing above him. "Don't you see? It's easier this way…it would be harder later…"
"Harder?"
"Ee…" His hand plucked at the tall grass. "Harder to say goodbye." He turned his head away and stared of towards the tree line. "I hate goodbyes…"
"Inuyasha…go to her. Fix this rift before it's too late." Kaede placed her hand on his shoulder. "She must also be feeling the same pain that you feel. Do you wish for her to suffer?"
"She's better off without me!" He jumped to his feet and glared down at the miko, hands clenched into fists at his sides. "All I ever do is put her in danger or hurt her feelin's or make her cry…" He bowed his head, hiding the pain in his eyes. "I hate seein' her cry…" His soft voice shook with emotion. Slowly he looked up again. "Maybe she would've been better off with that yaze ookami after all. At least Kouga didn't make her cry…"
"You can't mean that. Kagome doesn't care for him as she cares for you…why else do you think you have the power to hurt her?" As soon as the words were out of her mouth she knew it was the wrong thing to say.
Inuyasha flinched away from her. "That's why she's better off where she is. At least this way she's safe…and I can't make her cry."
Kaede frowned up at him. "Inuyasha…is this any better than when you threw her down the well and tried to seal it? Don't leave things as they are. Go to her and talk to her…you may be surprised at what she may say."
"I can't!" He shouted and sat down hard hugging his knees to his chest. "Why do you have to meddle, babaa? This isn't any of your business!" He glared up at her fiercely. "Kagome chose to leave, Kaede-babaa…it was her decision. Leave it at that, all right? I didn't get here fast enough and she's gone. I won't force her to come back." He rested his chin on his upraised knees. "I think that's what drove her away to begin with."
"Hmmph. So now you see what your controlling ways have wrought." He glanced towards the well again and frowned. If I'm going to meddle I may as well do a good job of it. "If she were here this very moment…what would you say to her?"
"Keh. She isn't here, is she? It doesn't matter anymore…"
"Baka! Being closed mouthed about things is what got you into this mess in the first place! Are you going to continue being so stubborn? If you are, I wash my hands of the whole affair. She released you from Kikyo-oneesama's seal…even though I warned her against it…you at least owe her thanks for that, you ungrateful hanyou!"
He flinched at the angry tone in her voice as well as the words. She's right…if not for Kagome I'd still be pinned to that tree…sealed…dead. Kagome saved me…and I never thanked her for it. "You're right…" He whispered. "You're right, Kaede-babaa…" Looking up at her he smiled sadly. "I am ungrateful…but it's too late now." He drew in a deep breath and froze, amber eyes widening in shock. "K-Kagome?" He jumped to his feet and turned his face up slightly, sniffing at the air. This is Kagome's scent…but it shouldn't be so strong…she isn't here anymore. Turning slightly he continued to sniff delicately, tilting his head towards the wind and inhaling deeply before turning to the well. Casting an accusing look over his shoulder at the miko standing just behind him clutching her bow, he growled low in his throat. "What the hell?" He jumped to the edge of the well and peered down, spotting Kagome crouching at the bottom looking up at him with eyes wide with surprise immediately. "Kagome?!"
~~*~~
**To Be Continued…**
Definitions:
-Babaa: a colloquial, rude way of referring to old women; has the connotation of "old hag"
Hanyou: Half human, half youkai
Youkai: Demon
Ee: Yes; yeah
Miko: Priestess
Yaze Ookami: Wimpy wolf
Baka: Stupid; idiot; fool
Oneesama: older sister; neesama is very respectful.