~*~I've Never~*~
By: Mae Noelle
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the good stuff; I daresay the plot is mine, but every where you go somebody copies someone. I got the idea though from a Gundam Wing fic I read three years ago. I swear, if there is another out there in the Harry Potter world, I was the first!
A/N (authors note) I've never is a game where everyone gathers in a circle with a glass of any type of alcoholic beverage they might like, and in the middle is refills. Each person takes a turn, going in a continuous circle saying things that they have never done, and anyone who has done that thing, takes a drink. Of course, since this group *happens* to be a wizard group, this is going to be more fun. Also I take advantage of the fact where Dumbledore has an idea for everything. *Stifles laugh* My ideas.
BE WARNED! I wrote this story AGES ago, and it's slightly OOC and crazy. Have fun.
Chapter one: The Party
~*~
"Do you think we should have invited Snape?"
"Of course."
"But I hate him,"
"All the better, dear. All the better."
Silence.
"I guess that is why you invited Draco?" She looks up. A mischievous grin floated across the mans face. A short, fiery woman folded the last of the invitations and smiled up.
"Done! Shall we go send them out now?" She handed a pile of cream, raspberry smelling cards to a tall, dark and handsome stranger. (Stranger to you, anyways)
"If you would like. We should go get some of the supplies anyways, I hate doing everything at the last minute." Together the pair walked out the door.
*The scene then turns to the pair, walking away into the orange and red painted sunset. Then turns to a cream card that had fallen open onto the ground*
Inside it said:
You are invited!
December 23, 6:00 pm
Please, we hope you can make it to our fifth anniversary! Nothing is a better then friend all around you on our special day. (Of course, we like
bath soaps, decorative candles, (a word scribbled out so it can not be
seen) and Quidditch items. We hope to see you there!
Fun things to do:
I've Never
Yours Truly,
Harry and Ginny Potter
~*~
Ginny looks at the clock. Again. 4:28. She sighs. "WILL this time go any faster?"
"Not when you stare at it every thirty seconds. Will you come over here and help me? This, thing, is not working."
They spent the next hour and 24 minutes preparing everything. A stack of chairs sat in an unused corner, hidden from view. Finally, someone came to the door.
DING. DONG. DING-A-LING-A-LING.
"I'll get it!" Ginny ran, an excitement surrounding the air around here. "Hermione! How nice to see you! Come in!"
"Oh! You look very nice, you know. I couldn't find anything good to throw on, so I just dragged myself over here in some muggle clothes." Ginny glanced down. She giggled. 'This is definitely going to make this more interesting,' she thought.
"Come on! Harry!" She called back to her husband. "Hermione's here! I think we can tell her about the game before anyone is here. She deserves to know," She added the last parts in a whisper towards Harry.
Harry tried to pull a serious look. "Hermione, we are going to have this one game, it has to do with alcohol, and, uum, drinking it," and He tried to keep in his laughter. "I just thought we would tell you. We aren't going to tell anyone else. Also, here's a list of whom all is coming," He shoved a short bit of parchment into her hands.
"Hmm, Me, Ron, Neville, Seamus, George, Fred, Cho," Hermione shot Harry a curious glance "Professors Dumbledore, Snape, and Lupin, Sirius, and- what? Why the hell is Malfoy coming?" Harry started to laugh.
"Well, as I told you, this game we are playing, it has to do with alcohol, and um, lying, and telling the truth, and getting drunk." He looked up and Hermione and Ginny, who both didn't know exactly what was going on. "Oh, Dumbledore will explain it all later."
DING. DONG. DING-A-LING-A-LING.
"Oh, let me get it!" Ginny ran off again, pulling in Ron and Seamus a few seconds later. Both looked up at Hermione, then looked down, turning a bit red.
~*~
"Alright, everyone's here. That is, except for Snape," Harry snorted. "And I seriously doubted he was even going to look at the invitation, let alone open it." Suddenly the door rang.
"God, I knew that would work! He lives to prove me wrong, you see." Ginny ran to the door, pulling in a reluctant looking Snape. He looked confused for a moment, looking out into the living room where everyone was sitting in an assortment of chairs and beanbag chairs. It quickly dissolved into resentment, and he was about to let out a snide remark when he was shoved into a chair.
Dumbledore stood up, and looked out into the many faces. "I shall get the drinks, right, Harry?" He and Harry exchanged looks that clearly told everyone that these weren't normal drinks.
Dumbledore came back, passing cute little margarita glasses to each of the guests. Draco looked up, but shut his mouth, thinking better of the question he was going to ask. Each glass was filled with barely a gulp of warm, reddish liquid. Harry brought many different bottles to the middle of the circle of people, grinning slightly towards Ginny.
"Alright, everybody take a gulp of this delicious drink," Dumbledore motioned his hand towards his glass. "While I tell you of what we will be doing. This is quite a fun game. Oh yes, very interesting. We shall go around in a circle, each saying something that we have never done. Anyone who has done the thing the one spoke of must take a sip of his or her drink. If anyone drinks to your 'I've Never' you pick one of the people who did, and ask them either who, what, where, when, why, or how. After they answer the question, we move on around the circle. Any questions?"
No one had any, so Dumbledore went on. "Alright then. If you agree to this game, and playing along with it, raise your empty glasses." Everyone's glasses were already empty, for the drink had tasted quite good. Only Hermione was left, reluctantly lifting the glass to her lips and emptying it. Dumbledore once again looked around, smiling. "Well. Now I guess I shall tell you what you just drank."
Draco smacked his forehead, Snape cursed, and Hermione coughed. Ginny glared at Harry, who was looking a little impish.
"This is a potion, which makes the drinker unable to lie, cover up, or tell part truth."
Draco started to smirk, thinking of some loophole. Dumbledore saw this, and decided he would leave the rest for everyone else to find out.
"Damn," George banged down his glass. "Why hadn't we thought of that?'
"Wait, Albus, I know this potion, it is supposed to last for-" Sirius looked at Dumbledore, alarmed.
"Oh, Shut up. There was only enough in the glasses to last for at most until tomorrow." Snape sent a sneer at Sirius.
"And, since he asked me for the ingredients earlier but not liver worm that means the potion would be unable to last for a lifetime."
"Wow, Snape. You are almost half as smart as they say you are. Well done," Sirius smirked.
"So shall we begin?" Harry spoke, wishing he could watch the fight longer. After about ten minutes arguing who would go first and which way they should go, they decided with going clock wise, starting with Ginny, ending up with the order going Ginny, Hermione, Draco, George, Fred, Neville, Seamus, Cho, Harry, Ron, Snape, Lupin, Sirius, and then Dumbledore.
"All right." Ginny spoke quietly, drawing the attention from the whole room. She thought hard, thinking of something good, but something she hadn't done. She couldn't think of anything embarrassing that moment, so she thought of something that would get them all to drink. "Okay. I have never kissed - on the lips - with more then two people." Almost everyone looked at her in surprise. Everyone took a drink of their newly filled glass. Hermione looked over to Ginny. 'If it was not for the fact we can't lie, I wouldn't believe her,' Harry was looking at Ginny, contemplating who had been her other.
"Aren't you going to ask one of the people who drank a question?" Harry looked up at Ginny. He coughed, a cough which sounded suspiciously like Sirius.
"All right. Cho?" 'Who, what, where, when, or why? Which do I want to know?' She shuddered. She really didn't want to know who it was, she was too afraid it would be something she would regret asking. "Where? Details, details,"
Cho looked up uncomfortably. 'Is it just me, or is she looking at Harry? Its just me.' She turned to look at Harry. 'At least, it had better be. For her sake.'
"Alright, It was in the library. Yes, the Hogwarts library." Hermione looked at Cho. She suddenly smiled. 'Oooooo, I gots an idea!'
Hermione looked up maliciously. "I've never," She thought slowly, thinking of how to say this. All eyes turned to her. Harry seemed to be the only one that had an idea what that look meant. "I've never... had sex," Sirius snorted into the drink he had been sneaking between turns. Draco looked down at his drink, hoping no one saw his sad/mad expression. All eyes slowly followed another's to the shaking form of Snape, staring, not knowing that all the Professors had just slowly taken a drink. Snape was shaking. Sirius sighed and took another sip.
'What in the bloody hell?' Snape looked at his arm. It was shaking. It was forcing its way up, too. He tried to push it back down, but suddenly -
"Uuuhhg!" Snape cried out as his drink was flung in his face. He coughed and sputtered, wiping his eyes with his robe. Dumbledore looked quite amused.
"Oh." Dumbledore reached into the middle of the circle, grabbing a bottle of rum, pouring himself and Sirius another glass. "Looks like I forgot to mention something. This potion also makes it so that you can't not drink when you have done someone's "I've Never". You see, if you try to lie, it will not go unnoticed," He smiled at Snape, who was red in the face, shaking.
"But... but... the potion, it doesn't do-"
"Ah, but Severus, this is not exactly the same one. I altered it a bit." There was a loud crash.
"Sirius?" Harry looked over to the lump on the ground that was Sirius. "What's wrong with you?" He was shaking, shaking uncontrollably. He lifted his hand slowly to grip the back of his chair, tears of mirth streaming down his face.
Draco tore his gaze from the ground, smirking. "So, Dumbledore, you are trying to say that Snape was trying to hide the fact that he's had-"
There was another crash; Sirius fell of the chair again. This time though, he grabbed Lupin's arm pulling him smashing him into Snape. Lupin looked up to apologize, but immediately tore his eyes off him.
"I'll never be able to look you in the face again, Severus," He managed to get out.
"Enough, I get to ask my question!" Hermione looked around the room, speculating which person she would like to torment most. "So Malfoy?" She swiveled in her beanbag, turning to him.
He choked down his stolen sip of margarita. "What?" He hoped he sounded cruel, rude, and indifferent.
"Which would you like me to ask? Who? What? Where? When? Why?" Snape let out a cruel laugh.
"I must admit, this is actually an amusing game," Snape took another gulp of his drink emptying it. "Damn," he muttered, reaching down to an empty bottle of brandy at his feet.
~*~ End ~*~
Be reminded this is for crazy entertainment only.
Please R&R! I would really appreciate it! I am working on the next chapter already, ooooohoho. This is so fun, I can't stop. I just hope that someone out there enjoys it as much as me, because laughing at my own jokes gets boring after a while.
By: Mae Noelle
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the good stuff; I daresay the plot is mine, but every where you go somebody copies someone. I got the idea though from a Gundam Wing fic I read three years ago. I swear, if there is another out there in the Harry Potter world, I was the first!
A/N (authors note) I've never is a game where everyone gathers in a circle with a glass of any type of alcoholic beverage they might like, and in the middle is refills. Each person takes a turn, going in a continuous circle saying things that they have never done, and anyone who has done that thing, takes a drink. Of course, since this group *happens* to be a wizard group, this is going to be more fun. Also I take advantage of the fact where Dumbledore has an idea for everything. *Stifles laugh* My ideas.
BE WARNED! I wrote this story AGES ago, and it's slightly OOC and crazy. Have fun.
Chapter one: The Party
~*~
"Do you think we should have invited Snape?"
"Of course."
"But I hate him,"
"All the better, dear. All the better."
Silence.
"I guess that is why you invited Draco?" She looks up. A mischievous grin floated across the mans face. A short, fiery woman folded the last of the invitations and smiled up.
"Done! Shall we go send them out now?" She handed a pile of cream, raspberry smelling cards to a tall, dark and handsome stranger. (Stranger to you, anyways)
"If you would like. We should go get some of the supplies anyways, I hate doing everything at the last minute." Together the pair walked out the door.
*The scene then turns to the pair, walking away into the orange and red painted sunset. Then turns to a cream card that had fallen open onto the ground*
Inside it said:
You are invited!
December 23, 6:00 pm
Please, we hope you can make it to our fifth anniversary! Nothing is a better then friend all around you on our special day. (Of course, we like
bath soaps, decorative candles, (a word scribbled out so it can not be
seen) and Quidditch items. We hope to see you there!
Fun things to do:
I've Never
Yours Truly,
Harry and Ginny Potter
~*~
Ginny looks at the clock. Again. 4:28. She sighs. "WILL this time go any faster?"
"Not when you stare at it every thirty seconds. Will you come over here and help me? This, thing, is not working."
They spent the next hour and 24 minutes preparing everything. A stack of chairs sat in an unused corner, hidden from view. Finally, someone came to the door.
DING. DONG. DING-A-LING-A-LING.
"I'll get it!" Ginny ran, an excitement surrounding the air around here. "Hermione! How nice to see you! Come in!"
"Oh! You look very nice, you know. I couldn't find anything good to throw on, so I just dragged myself over here in some muggle clothes." Ginny glanced down. She giggled. 'This is definitely going to make this more interesting,' she thought.
"Come on! Harry!" She called back to her husband. "Hermione's here! I think we can tell her about the game before anyone is here. She deserves to know," She added the last parts in a whisper towards Harry.
Harry tried to pull a serious look. "Hermione, we are going to have this one game, it has to do with alcohol, and, uum, drinking it," and He tried to keep in his laughter. "I just thought we would tell you. We aren't going to tell anyone else. Also, here's a list of whom all is coming," He shoved a short bit of parchment into her hands.
"Hmm, Me, Ron, Neville, Seamus, George, Fred, Cho," Hermione shot Harry a curious glance "Professors Dumbledore, Snape, and Lupin, Sirius, and- what? Why the hell is Malfoy coming?" Harry started to laugh.
"Well, as I told you, this game we are playing, it has to do with alcohol, and um, lying, and telling the truth, and getting drunk." He looked up and Hermione and Ginny, who both didn't know exactly what was going on. "Oh, Dumbledore will explain it all later."
DING. DONG. DING-A-LING-A-LING.
"Oh, let me get it!" Ginny ran off again, pulling in Ron and Seamus a few seconds later. Both looked up at Hermione, then looked down, turning a bit red.
~*~
"Alright, everyone's here. That is, except for Snape," Harry snorted. "And I seriously doubted he was even going to look at the invitation, let alone open it." Suddenly the door rang.
"God, I knew that would work! He lives to prove me wrong, you see." Ginny ran to the door, pulling in a reluctant looking Snape. He looked confused for a moment, looking out into the living room where everyone was sitting in an assortment of chairs and beanbag chairs. It quickly dissolved into resentment, and he was about to let out a snide remark when he was shoved into a chair.
Dumbledore stood up, and looked out into the many faces. "I shall get the drinks, right, Harry?" He and Harry exchanged looks that clearly told everyone that these weren't normal drinks.
Dumbledore came back, passing cute little margarita glasses to each of the guests. Draco looked up, but shut his mouth, thinking better of the question he was going to ask. Each glass was filled with barely a gulp of warm, reddish liquid. Harry brought many different bottles to the middle of the circle of people, grinning slightly towards Ginny.
"Alright, everybody take a gulp of this delicious drink," Dumbledore motioned his hand towards his glass. "While I tell you of what we will be doing. This is quite a fun game. Oh yes, very interesting. We shall go around in a circle, each saying something that we have never done. Anyone who has done the thing the one spoke of must take a sip of his or her drink. If anyone drinks to your 'I've Never' you pick one of the people who did, and ask them either who, what, where, when, why, or how. After they answer the question, we move on around the circle. Any questions?"
No one had any, so Dumbledore went on. "Alright then. If you agree to this game, and playing along with it, raise your empty glasses." Everyone's glasses were already empty, for the drink had tasted quite good. Only Hermione was left, reluctantly lifting the glass to her lips and emptying it. Dumbledore once again looked around, smiling. "Well. Now I guess I shall tell you what you just drank."
Draco smacked his forehead, Snape cursed, and Hermione coughed. Ginny glared at Harry, who was looking a little impish.
"This is a potion, which makes the drinker unable to lie, cover up, or tell part truth."
Draco started to smirk, thinking of some loophole. Dumbledore saw this, and decided he would leave the rest for everyone else to find out.
"Damn," George banged down his glass. "Why hadn't we thought of that?'
"Wait, Albus, I know this potion, it is supposed to last for-" Sirius looked at Dumbledore, alarmed.
"Oh, Shut up. There was only enough in the glasses to last for at most until tomorrow." Snape sent a sneer at Sirius.
"And, since he asked me for the ingredients earlier but not liver worm that means the potion would be unable to last for a lifetime."
"Wow, Snape. You are almost half as smart as they say you are. Well done," Sirius smirked.
"So shall we begin?" Harry spoke, wishing he could watch the fight longer. After about ten minutes arguing who would go first and which way they should go, they decided with going clock wise, starting with Ginny, ending up with the order going Ginny, Hermione, Draco, George, Fred, Neville, Seamus, Cho, Harry, Ron, Snape, Lupin, Sirius, and then Dumbledore.
"All right." Ginny spoke quietly, drawing the attention from the whole room. She thought hard, thinking of something good, but something she hadn't done. She couldn't think of anything embarrassing that moment, so she thought of something that would get them all to drink. "Okay. I have never kissed - on the lips - with more then two people." Almost everyone looked at her in surprise. Everyone took a drink of their newly filled glass. Hermione looked over to Ginny. 'If it was not for the fact we can't lie, I wouldn't believe her,' Harry was looking at Ginny, contemplating who had been her other.
"Aren't you going to ask one of the people who drank a question?" Harry looked up at Ginny. He coughed, a cough which sounded suspiciously like Sirius.
"All right. Cho?" 'Who, what, where, when, or why? Which do I want to know?' She shuddered. She really didn't want to know who it was, she was too afraid it would be something she would regret asking. "Where? Details, details,"
Cho looked up uncomfortably. 'Is it just me, or is she looking at Harry? Its just me.' She turned to look at Harry. 'At least, it had better be. For her sake.'
"Alright, It was in the library. Yes, the Hogwarts library." Hermione looked at Cho. She suddenly smiled. 'Oooooo, I gots an idea!'
Hermione looked up maliciously. "I've never," She thought slowly, thinking of how to say this. All eyes turned to her. Harry seemed to be the only one that had an idea what that look meant. "I've never... had sex," Sirius snorted into the drink he had been sneaking between turns. Draco looked down at his drink, hoping no one saw his sad/mad expression. All eyes slowly followed another's to the shaking form of Snape, staring, not knowing that all the Professors had just slowly taken a drink. Snape was shaking. Sirius sighed and took another sip.
'What in the bloody hell?' Snape looked at his arm. It was shaking. It was forcing its way up, too. He tried to push it back down, but suddenly -
"Uuuhhg!" Snape cried out as his drink was flung in his face. He coughed and sputtered, wiping his eyes with his robe. Dumbledore looked quite amused.
"Oh." Dumbledore reached into the middle of the circle, grabbing a bottle of rum, pouring himself and Sirius another glass. "Looks like I forgot to mention something. This potion also makes it so that you can't not drink when you have done someone's "I've Never". You see, if you try to lie, it will not go unnoticed," He smiled at Snape, who was red in the face, shaking.
"But... but... the potion, it doesn't do-"
"Ah, but Severus, this is not exactly the same one. I altered it a bit." There was a loud crash.
"Sirius?" Harry looked over to the lump on the ground that was Sirius. "What's wrong with you?" He was shaking, shaking uncontrollably. He lifted his hand slowly to grip the back of his chair, tears of mirth streaming down his face.
Draco tore his gaze from the ground, smirking. "So, Dumbledore, you are trying to say that Snape was trying to hide the fact that he's had-"
There was another crash; Sirius fell of the chair again. This time though, he grabbed Lupin's arm pulling him smashing him into Snape. Lupin looked up to apologize, but immediately tore his eyes off him.
"I'll never be able to look you in the face again, Severus," He managed to get out.
"Enough, I get to ask my question!" Hermione looked around the room, speculating which person she would like to torment most. "So Malfoy?" She swiveled in her beanbag, turning to him.
He choked down his stolen sip of margarita. "What?" He hoped he sounded cruel, rude, and indifferent.
"Which would you like me to ask? Who? What? Where? When? Why?" Snape let out a cruel laugh.
"I must admit, this is actually an amusing game," Snape took another gulp of his drink emptying it. "Damn," he muttered, reaching down to an empty bottle of brandy at his feet.
~*~ End ~*~
Be reminded this is for crazy entertainment only.
Please R&R! I would really appreciate it! I am working on the next chapter already, ooooohoho. This is so fun, I can't stop. I just hope that someone out there enjoys it as much as me, because laughing at my own jokes gets boring after a while.