NOTE: This is the final chapter in this story...but don't fret, everyone will be back for a second tale, a sequel that I will be unveiling within month or two (hopefully)! Secondly, this chapter will be going back to Sydney's POV, much like the first chapter! Enjoy!
I've felt a lot of pain in my life. I was shot by my own mother for goodness sake. I've had numerous breaks, sprains and various cuts during my stint as an agent. I went through childbirth before, but my memories of it still elude me. I search for my husband's face. I know from the warmth of his eyes and smile that he is with me, sharing my pain, as he has been for years.
"Push Syd!" he screams, barely audible over my own cries.
"I can't!" I shout, throwing my head back against my pillow.
"Yes you can honey! You can do this! We'll do this together, like we always have!" he squeezes my hand and I squeeze back, maybe a little too hard I think, from the painful look that comes across his face. Despite this he smiles, and his grin immediately makes me weak and strong at the same time. I push again and the pain becomes well worth it, when we hear the cry of our first child.
"He's out!" my husband cries and with tears welling in his eyes, he kisses my forehead tenderly.
"How is he?" I ask, searching for my child.
"He's perfect, just like you Syd."
The doctor hands our precious baby to my husband who immediately brings him to me. As I touch him for the first time, I instantly fall in love with my son. His eyes, slightly unfocused at first, focus on my face and he reaches his miniature hands to grasp my index finger. He is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.
"Got a name for this little guy?" the doctor interrupts my inspection of the baby, and I look to my husband, who has just returned from the waiting room. I can hear my parents and Will, crying and laughing, rejoicing at the birth of our child.
"Well honey?" I question my husband. He doesn't hesitate.
"Michael," he states. My eyes well up with tears. We hadn't even discussed this possibility, and yet he has read my mind.
"Yeah," I say, "How about Michael James?" I ask. He looks at me smiling.
"It's perfect," he says, kissing our son on the forehead. The doctor writes the name on a birth certificate, and as I turn to look at Michael again, my husband speaks.
"Welcome to the world Michael James Weiss."
I look up at Eric, whose eyes are swelling with pride. I reach up and pull his face to mine, kissing him squarely on the mouth. He pulls away after a few moments.
"God, Syd...I have so much to do...I have to buy this kid a yo-yo..." I laugh, only to realize he's completely serious. I don't want to shatter his yo-yo dreams.
"Okay honey. Tell Will, he'll go get one for him."
"Oh no! Will's cool, but he won't know what to get...it's got to be the right color, the right..."
"Eric?" I interrupt.
"What hon?"
"Shut up," I say sincerely, kissing him once more. When we let each other go, he looks at me, holding my face in his hands and smiles warmly.
"I love you Syd."
"I love you too honey."
*****
Five years and one more son later, we are both retired and living on the coast of California, less than three blocks away from my parents. I am sitting on our deck, holding our youngest son in my lap, gazing out at the ocean, where Eric is playing with Anna, Taryn and Michael. The newest addition to the family, precious Phillip, is a dark-haired brown-eyed wonder, who looks and acts more like his father every day. The only difference is he is chewing on the yo-yo his father bought him at birth.
As I absent-mindedly stroke Phillip's hair, my mind wanders to the past. Years ago, I had dreamed of moments similar to these, only Michael Vaughn was the father of my children, and Vaughn was playing in the surf, laughing and splashing. It had been my dream, to have moments like this with him and our family.
I smile. Yes, my life with Michael Vaughn had been wonderful, but short-lived. At one point I had considered him my destiny. I stand up and walk to meet my husband, hand Phillip to him and watch him as he laughs with our son. I gaze at him and he turns his eyes to me before his lips meet my own. Fireworks still, after all these years. We pull apart, and he brushes my hair from my face tenderly.
"Let's get these kids inside Mrs. Weiss," he says to me, and my heart still leaps when I hear that name.
"Right behind you Mr. Weiss." I say, as we lead the children to the house.
Later, when they are all tucked in, I sit on the patio, watching the sun fade into the distance. I smile as the breeze flows through my hair and the sky is painted bright shades of red, orange, blue and violet.
"Hey," a voice interrupts, as my husband settles in next to me on our patio swing, "Your mom called, she can watch the kids tomorrow."
"Oh okay, great," I say, looking at him up at him and smiling.
"What are you thinking about sweetheart?" he asks. Oh, how he knows me.
"Michael," I state blatantly. I don't have to lie; he knows.
"As in Vaughn?"
"Yeah," I sigh.
"What about him?" I can tell he is thinking that I wish Vaughn was here, instead of him.
"Well honey...I was thinking...I used to think Vaughn was my destiny. That's how it just had to be you know? He healed my wounds after Danny died. He saved my life many times. But when I disappeared, he got married. He hurt me, although he didn't mean to...he broke my heart."
"Syd..."
"Please, let me finish Eric. I'm not angry at him anymore. If he hadn't hurt me, we wouldn't have Taryn. I can't imagine life without her. More importantly, if it weren't for him, I never would have fallen in love with you." Tears well in my eyes as I continue, first taking a breath.
"Eric, this was meant to happen. You are my destiny, my best friend...you've never hurt me...you've only loved me. I know sometimes you think I look at you and that all I see is Michael and what I'm missing..." My husband is sobbing now, but I'm not quite finished.
"...but Eric, when I look at you, at our kids, at our life...I realize, this is where I'm supposed to be. This is where I want to be and you are the only man who will ever have my heart. You are it for me, for the rest of my life." I hold his face in my hands to reinforce what I am saying, wiping his tears from his face. He takes a deep breath.
"I didn't think it was possible..." he trails off.
"What sweetheart?" I ask, searching his face.
"To love you more... but I do, more and more every day. You and the kids are my life. I never imagined that life could be this good. I don't know what I ever did to deserve this, you, them..."
"Well," I interrupt, "you're the greatest man, protector, father I've ever known. Plus, you're awesome with a yo-yo. I mean, that's why I fell for you really," I say, trying to maintain a straight face. We both laugh, holding each other's faces.
"I love you Syd."
"I love you too."
As I kiss my husband, the now starry sky shining over us, for the first time I am at complete peace. Yes, this life is not what I had expected, but it is how it is meant to be and not only have I accepted it, but I am more than okay with it.