PART 12
Mac pinned her hair back off her face and headed towards the kitchen. "So, Flyboy, am I supposed to tip you for the delivery?" She smiled faintly. Hearing no response, she continued into the kitchen where she stopped dead in her tracks. "Harm.." She said tentatively.
"You've.been drinking again?" It was more a statement of disbelief than a question.
"I.wait, what the hell are you doing going through my cabinets?!" She screamed and slammed the cabinet shut.
"I was looking for a vase for the roses." He stood up. "You told me to make myself at home, but this isn't about me. Why is all that liquor here?"
"You're a smart boy, Commander. I'm sure you can figure that one out." She said bitterly.
"Mac." He sighed. "I know you're hurting, but, why go back to drinking. I mean, there are so many people that care about you. You're not alone now. You could've come to us."
"You know what? Get the hell out of my apartment. I don't have to answer to you. As you pointed out once, this isn't a marriage."
"No, it isn't. But you and I are best friends, Sarah and I'm not going anywhere. I've let you push me away for the past two weeks and look where its gotten you."
"Well, I'm sorry, but you don't really have a choice in the matter. Get out!"
"No." He shook his head. "I'm going to help you through this."
"I don't need you. The only men I need are Jim, Jack, Johnny Red, Johnny Black and Jose and they're all in the cabinet." She turned and went to get his coat.
Harm took a deep calming breath and got the bottles, pouring their contents down the drain.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Mac hissed as she rushed back into the kitchen.
"I'm helping you." He said calmly.
"You weren't there to stop him. That's when I needed you. But, I don't need your help now."
"I." He walked to her a slowly and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "I know I wasn't there and I'm so sorry, Sarah. But, I'm here now and I'm going to help you get through this. You've worked too hard for too long to throw it all away because of some sick bastard."
"Don't touch me!" She pushed him away, his closeness and tenderness slowly breaking down her resolve.
"Sarah, come to me."
Anger flared up in her chocolate brown eyes. "Why?! So you can turn me away again?! Send me away to cry in the street while you comfort someone else?!"
"I.I thought that you understood. Mac, I wanted to be there for you, but Renee's father."
"Shove it up your ass, Commander! I don't want to hear it. What I want is for you to get out before I have to kick your six."
"Do what you need to do, but I'm not leaving." He pulled her gently into his arms. "I'm here for you, Sarah."
She began to pound his chest angrily. "Get your hands off me! I hate you! Just leave me alone!"
Harm grimaced in pain, but simply pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her waist.
Tears began to stream down her cheeks and her hits became lighter until she finally crumbled into him, clinging desperately. "I.I just can't stop thinking about.I can still see him and smell him and.feel him." She sobbed softly.
"I know, Sarah." He said gently as he held her protectively to him, slowly stroking her soft hair. He rested his lips again the top of her head.
"I.I."
"Shhh, its okay." He picked her up carefully and carried her to the couch where he sat down with her in his lap. "How can I help you? I'll do anything. Well, anything but walk away." He smiled faintly.
"Just, um, keep holding me?" She asked very softly.
"Of course." He held her. //She sounds so broken and so fragile.// "Get some rest, Sarah. I'm not going to let anyone hurt you. I promise."
"Don't make a promise you can't keep."
"I haven't yet." He smiled faintly and laid down, pulling her gently with him.
"What about the Chinese?" Mac asked as she settled down on top of him.
"Its better reheated anyway." He pulled the afghan off the back of the couch and draped it over them.
"Thank you." She whispered.
"I'll always be here for you."
She nodded slightly and drifted to sleep slowly, feeling safe and loved in his arms.
"I love you." He whispered once he heard her breathing even out and deepen. "Now I just have to find the right time.and the nerve to tell you that when you're awake." He chuckled softly and soon drifted into a light sleep, his arms still tightly around her.
TBC
Mac pinned her hair back off her face and headed towards the kitchen. "So, Flyboy, am I supposed to tip you for the delivery?" She smiled faintly. Hearing no response, she continued into the kitchen where she stopped dead in her tracks. "Harm.." She said tentatively.
"You've.been drinking again?" It was more a statement of disbelief than a question.
"I.wait, what the hell are you doing going through my cabinets?!" She screamed and slammed the cabinet shut.
"I was looking for a vase for the roses." He stood up. "You told me to make myself at home, but this isn't about me. Why is all that liquor here?"
"You're a smart boy, Commander. I'm sure you can figure that one out." She said bitterly.
"Mac." He sighed. "I know you're hurting, but, why go back to drinking. I mean, there are so many people that care about you. You're not alone now. You could've come to us."
"You know what? Get the hell out of my apartment. I don't have to answer to you. As you pointed out once, this isn't a marriage."
"No, it isn't. But you and I are best friends, Sarah and I'm not going anywhere. I've let you push me away for the past two weeks and look where its gotten you."
"Well, I'm sorry, but you don't really have a choice in the matter. Get out!"
"No." He shook his head. "I'm going to help you through this."
"I don't need you. The only men I need are Jim, Jack, Johnny Red, Johnny Black and Jose and they're all in the cabinet." She turned and went to get his coat.
Harm took a deep calming breath and got the bottles, pouring their contents down the drain.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Mac hissed as she rushed back into the kitchen.
"I'm helping you." He said calmly.
"You weren't there to stop him. That's when I needed you. But, I don't need your help now."
"I." He walked to her a slowly and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "I know I wasn't there and I'm so sorry, Sarah. But, I'm here now and I'm going to help you get through this. You've worked too hard for too long to throw it all away because of some sick bastard."
"Don't touch me!" She pushed him away, his closeness and tenderness slowly breaking down her resolve.
"Sarah, come to me."
Anger flared up in her chocolate brown eyes. "Why?! So you can turn me away again?! Send me away to cry in the street while you comfort someone else?!"
"I.I thought that you understood. Mac, I wanted to be there for you, but Renee's father."
"Shove it up your ass, Commander! I don't want to hear it. What I want is for you to get out before I have to kick your six."
"Do what you need to do, but I'm not leaving." He pulled her gently into his arms. "I'm here for you, Sarah."
She began to pound his chest angrily. "Get your hands off me! I hate you! Just leave me alone!"
Harm grimaced in pain, but simply pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her waist.
Tears began to stream down her cheeks and her hits became lighter until she finally crumbled into him, clinging desperately. "I.I just can't stop thinking about.I can still see him and smell him and.feel him." She sobbed softly.
"I know, Sarah." He said gently as he held her protectively to him, slowly stroking her soft hair. He rested his lips again the top of her head.
"I.I."
"Shhh, its okay." He picked her up carefully and carried her to the couch where he sat down with her in his lap. "How can I help you? I'll do anything. Well, anything but walk away." He smiled faintly.
"Just, um, keep holding me?" She asked very softly.
"Of course." He held her. //She sounds so broken and so fragile.// "Get some rest, Sarah. I'm not going to let anyone hurt you. I promise."
"Don't make a promise you can't keep."
"I haven't yet." He smiled faintly and laid down, pulling her gently with him.
"What about the Chinese?" Mac asked as she settled down on top of him.
"Its better reheated anyway." He pulled the afghan off the back of the couch and draped it over them.
"Thank you." She whispered.
"I'll always be here for you."
She nodded slightly and drifted to sleep slowly, feeling safe and loved in his arms.
"I love you." He whispered once he heard her breathing even out and deepen. "Now I just have to find the right time.and the nerve to tell you that when you're awake." He chuckled softly and soon drifted into a light sleep, his arms still tightly around her.
TBC