The Hobbits Go to Charm School
By:Resisting Arrest
Chapter 4
disclaimer: I do not own J.R.R. Tolkien's characters,settings,names,etc and no infringement is intended.
credits:Thanks to God and thanks to the reviewers!
a/n:This does not tie in with the Fellowship House.It takes place before The War of the Ring,before they leave the Shire.It's been so long!
----
"What have you been feeding them,Gandalf? They look like hogs!" Arwen said disdainfully.
"I'll make ready the hose." said Haldir grimly.
"The hose?" Merry whispered.
"How else would we be able to remove such a stench.Baths for all of you!" said Arwen.
A few minutes later,Haldir reentered. "The hose is ready."
----1 hour later----
The hobbits stood in a row,muttering darkly.For the past hour, they had been sprayed forcefully with the hose, scrubbed roughly, and, worst of all, combs had been dragged through their unruly hair.
Th hobbits had not been required to strip for the mass bath,for that Pippin was grateful.Although there was that moment then Haldir fired the hose at Bilbo's extra large pants and they had been blown away.Pippin winced.He preferred not to think of it.
Frodo rubbed his head sullenly. "I'm almost bald!"
Legolas glared at him. "You should complain.Your hair claimed my favorite comb." Legolas sniffled sadly. Haldir hugged him tightly.
"It's okay,Legolas.You have more combs."
"B-but it was my f-f-favorite comb." Legolas wailed, "It was b-blue."
Pippin sniffed Frodo's arm. "Oh well,you smell better." he said brightly.
"That one gave me a manicure." growled Sam,gesturing to Haldir.He thrust out his big hand to show them.
"He had dirt underneath his nails! It was disgusting!" said Haldir.
"I'm a GARDENER." retorted Sam.
"It looks just right on you too,Sam.Right feminine." Merry laughed loudly.
Sam growled dangerously and leaped on Merry.He let out a string of expletives,most of which Pip had never heard before.He tried to remember them for future use.
Sam and Merry wrestled for a moment before Sam was wrenched off by Arwen.
"I can't leave you alone for a single minute! I have never heard such language in all my years."
"Me neither!" chimed in Pip.
"..And that'd be pretty freakin' long!" cracked Bilbo,jabbing Frodo in the side.
"You're a fine one!" Frodo jabbed him back.
----
Endnotes: More to come! Thanks for reading,please review!
By:Resisting Arrest
Chapter 4
disclaimer: I do not own J.R.R. Tolkien's characters,settings,names,etc and no infringement is intended.
credits:Thanks to God and thanks to the reviewers!
a/n:This does not tie in with the Fellowship House.It takes place before The War of the Ring,before they leave the Shire.It's been so long!
----
"What have you been feeding them,Gandalf? They look like hogs!" Arwen said disdainfully.
"I'll make ready the hose." said Haldir grimly.
"The hose?" Merry whispered.
"How else would we be able to remove such a stench.Baths for all of you!" said Arwen.
A few minutes later,Haldir reentered. "The hose is ready."
----1 hour later----
The hobbits stood in a row,muttering darkly.For the past hour, they had been sprayed forcefully with the hose, scrubbed roughly, and, worst of all, combs had been dragged through their unruly hair.
Th hobbits had not been required to strip for the mass bath,for that Pippin was grateful.Although there was that moment then Haldir fired the hose at Bilbo's extra large pants and they had been blown away.Pippin winced.He preferred not to think of it.
Frodo rubbed his head sullenly. "I'm almost bald!"
Legolas glared at him. "You should complain.Your hair claimed my favorite comb." Legolas sniffled sadly. Haldir hugged him tightly.
"It's okay,Legolas.You have more combs."
"B-but it was my f-f-favorite comb." Legolas wailed, "It was b-blue."
Pippin sniffed Frodo's arm. "Oh well,you smell better." he said brightly.
"That one gave me a manicure." growled Sam,gesturing to Haldir.He thrust out his big hand to show them.
"He had dirt underneath his nails! It was disgusting!" said Haldir.
"I'm a GARDENER." retorted Sam.
"It looks just right on you too,Sam.Right feminine." Merry laughed loudly.
Sam growled dangerously and leaped on Merry.He let out a string of expletives,most of which Pip had never heard before.He tried to remember them for future use.
Sam and Merry wrestled for a moment before Sam was wrenched off by Arwen.
"I can't leave you alone for a single minute! I have never heard such language in all my years."
"Me neither!" chimed in Pip.
"..And that'd be pretty freakin' long!" cracked Bilbo,jabbing Frodo in the side.
"You're a fine one!" Frodo jabbed him back.
----
Endnotes: More to come! Thanks for reading,please review!