CHAPTER 134
"Gideon, can I have a word lad?" Angus says as he sits down beside me as we fly back to Seattle.
I'm still reeling from Jared's words at the store. He called me dad.
"Hmmm" I say as I look across at him.
"You should know, your… altercation with Chris has made it to the internet," he glances at Jared, "along with Jared's unsolicited comments".
Realisation hits me, "Shit" I mutter.
Jared looks at me carefully, "What?" he asks.
I lick my lips, "The media are now aware of the fact you are my son, so this is probably going to get ugly fast" I say.
Jared stares at me, "I'm sorry" he mutters, "…are you ashamed of me?" he asks.
My eyes widen at that, "FUCK! NO!" I blurt out loudly.
"Gideon" Angus says warningly.
I realise immediately what I have just said, in my rush to reassure Jared I have had a complete brain to mouth malfunction, and I close my eyes briefly. "Sorry, sorry… no Jared, I am not ashamed of you. Never, ever think that. You are my son and I am proud of that fact, and I am beyond proud of you but as your father I need to protect you… because of who I am" I say.
Jared nods, "Also because that guy mentioned Corrine… the media will probably approach her and that means she will bug you again" he says.
I tip my head in acknowledgement of that, "That is a possibility, yes" I agree.
Jared moves and comes and sits next to me and he hesitantly places his hand on my arm, "I'm sorry I called you dad in public… it just seemed like the right thing to do at that moment, I'm not sure why I did it… that guy was being an ass… an A hole and so that and after what you told me about him… I made the link that you were a dad as well, and even though it's different because you are my dad, not a step dad but you have taken me on and you have done so willingly… I mean you could've said you wanted nothing to do with me" he shrugs as he rambles and tries to makes sense of his thoughts.
I frown, he shouldn't have to worry about what he says in public and now he feels as though he has to justify it, then it hits me - he regrets saying it. "Do you regret calling me dad?" I ask.
Jared hesitates, and my heart sinks. "I'm not sure… in that moment it felt right, but now… especially after seeing that video at the police station" he pauses and bites his lip and I see tears starting to well up in his eyes, "My dad… William Martin was my dad, but then again you are also my dad, biologically and you have also taken on the job of being my dad now… but I am confused. Am I… am I betraying my dad for thinking that way?"
I realise this is not about me, this is about him feeling like he is betraying his dad by giving me that title and I shake my head, "No, no way at all" I say as I reach for him.
I glance up at Christian who is listening and he comes and sits with us, his hands clasped in front of him, with a look of concern on his face. "You need to process these thoughts Jared and we will make sure you get time with Caroline to do so when we get back, but I know three people who will be able to give you some sound advice on this" he says.
Jared looks up at him questioningly, "Who?" he asks.
"Ana, Eva and Elliot" he says. "Elliot especially, as he was raised by mom and dad but he now has his birth mom in his life and is building a relationship with her" he explains.
Jared pauses and thinks, and realisation fills his face, "The guy who when I first came to Seattle helped us move all my stuff?" he says.
Christian nods, "That's right" he says.
"His story is very similar to yours, whilst also being very different. His birth mom was very young and the guy who got her pregnant abandoned her. She had no option but to put El up for adoption to give him a better life. Mom and dad adopted him, and raised him but recently when Ana and Eva discovered they were sisters they also discovered that their biological dad was also the guy who was El's dad, he had done the same thing to Eva and Ana's moms, got them pregnant and abandoned them. So, they – Ana and Eva were both raised by men who were not their dads but to them always would be. El reached out to his birth mom… through Finding Family, and much like what happened with you and Gideon they found El's birth mom. She is now in his life and they are building a relationship, but to El his mom will always be Grace Trevellyan Grey the woman who adopted him and raised him".
Jared is listening carefully and then he frowns, "Wait… So… your wife is your brother's sister?" he asks.
We both grin, and Christian nods, "Yeah it was a bit weird to begin with, but we've worked through it".
oooOOOooo
When we eventually arrive back in Seattle everyone is waiting patiently for us to hear what had happened. Caroline is also present and she is watching us all carefully.
"Well?" Eva asks as we walk in.
The feeling of need I get engulfs me as I stare at my wife, "Come here Angel, I need you it has been a traumatic day all round" I say.
Eva doesn't hesitate and she walks towards me wrapping her arms around me, "Something kicked off with Chris as well didn't it? My phone has been going crazy with the Google alerts on you".
I wrap one arm around her and press a kiss to her head. I glance over and see Christian is doing the same thing with Ana and then I see he has his nose firmly buried in her hair.
"Yeah, but I think we all need to just sit and relax," I turn towards Jared who is still standing beside me and he nods.
We move to the sofa and Caroline is just watching silently, waiting for someone to speak.
Jared looks at Caroline, "I'm feeling confused" he says suddenly.
Caroline nods, "Alright, do you want to speak here or would you prefer to talk somewhere privately?" she asks.
Jared looks around, "Here is fine" he says. "I said something… I said something which has now caused a lot of trouble for Gideon" he says.
I am immediately shaking my head and reassuring him, "No, Jared you haven't" I say. I can't help but notice he is back to calling me Gideon again, and I'm surprised by how much that fact hurts.
"What happened?" Caroline asks.
Jared takes a deep breath, "I think I'll just go through the day… and start at the beginning" he says.
Caroline nods, "However you want to discuss it is fine" she says.
Jared nods, "We went to Chicago – I asked to go, because after what I was told, I wanted to go and see if I remembered anything else… you know if I was where it happened if it would make me remember something. I mean I saw that bird on the beach and that made me remember something, so I figured it was worth a shot. Gideon wasn't keen on the idea but agreed saying if I got upset he would call the whole thing off and I thought that was fair enough… But in the end I didn't really remember much, just that I remembered seeing the guy's car a couple of times… I also wanted to go to Chicago for a couple of other reasons, I wanted to go and tell the police there what I did know… to help them" he stops and shakes his head. "We went to the police station and I saw a video… someone came forward with it and gave it to the police it showed my uncle murdered my mom… he just shot her, he stood over her and shot her". He stops and as his breathing accelerates he scrunches his eyes shut as he remembers the images. I reach for him and hold him tightly.
"Breathe Jared, I've got you" I whisper to him.
Jared reaches blindly for me and he slowly calms and relaxes as I say that, "Thank you dad" he whispers and my heart lurches. Everyone tries not to react to that remark but there are several sharp gasps and Caroline's eyes widen in surprise.
Jared opens his eyes and seems to now be calm again, he also seems to be unaware of what he just said. He takes a deep breath and lets it out, "Sorry… While we were in Chicago, I also wanted to go somewhere and do something which I needed to do. Something which would've always bothered me if I hadn't been able to do. We went back to where I lived with mom and dad, and I scattered the ashes of my dog. The ashes were right where I left them, it felt right doing that… but Gideon did something… something totally amazing while we were there, you see the house is up for sale because… anyway Gideon has bought it, so…" he pauses and looks at Eva, "So, I guess you guys have a home in Chicago now as well" he says with a grin.
Eva smiles at Jared but doesn't say anything.
"That house will always be yours Jared" I say immediately.
Jared squeezes my hand at that, "Thanks dad" he says again.
"Anyway, back to what happened. Also, while we were there, I went to a shop and bought…" he stops and panic fills his face, "I left them on the plane" he hisses at me.
"Jared relax, Angus has them" I say and I see him almost sag with relief at that.
"Can I get them?" he asks as he glances at Ana.
I nod and pulling out my phone I text Angus, who appears a moment later with the card and chocolates. Jared immediately leaps to his feet and practically runs to collect them.
"Here you go lad" Angus says with a grin.
"Thank you so much Angus" Jared says in relief.
He takes them and walks over to Ana, "Happy birthday Ana, I'm sorry it's not wrapped but…" he thrusts out the chocolates and card which he had written before we landed.
"Oh Jared, you didn't have to do that! But thank you so much" she says as she accepts them and hugs him tightly.
Happy he has done this he sits down again next to me and reaches for me once more. "So, where was I… oh yeah, I went to the shop to get those" he points to the things in Ana's hands, "…and when we were leaving this guy showed up, and he started having a go at Gideon. I realised it was the guy who was his step dad when he was a kid… as he told me all about that time, and I don't know why, but I got really mad. I told him to leave Gideon alone and I told him he shouldn't have taken on the job of dad to him if he didn't want it… I told him he should've loved him and believed him". I glance at Eva who is grinning from ear to ear as she hears this.
Jared puts his head down, "The guy asked me who I was and I said… I just didn't think, I blurted it out I said I was his son… and now everyone will know because it's all over the internet and that means my birth mom will start bugging you guys again and I'm sorry" he says.
I increase my grip on Jared and pull him closer, "You have nothing to apologise for Jared as you did nothing wrong. I should be the one to apologise Jared for my appalling behaviour, when I lost my temper with Chris, you shouldn't have seen me behaving in that manner" I say.
Jared grins at me, "He deserved it, but I didn't want you getting in trouble for punching him… but did you get that he knew the truth about me? Because that's what I got from what he said" he says.
I nod, "I did and that is what made me want to punch him" I say, I pause and stroke his head, "You called me dad".
Caroline looks up and pauses in her note taking as I say that.
Jared nods, "Like I said it felt right, especially at that moment after what he said" he says. "But now…" he looks at Caroline, "Am I being ungrateful… disrespectful… to my dad, am I betraying him for calling Gideon dad?" he asks.
Caroline smiles at him, "Jared you have called Gideon dad a couple of times while you have been explaining and describing what happened today".
Jared's eyes widen at that as he realises.
"You have also called him Gideon, so this says to me you want Gideon to be your dad but you also feel a degree of discomfort with that fact, which you have confirmed with your question about betraying your father, do you feel conflicted with your decision to call Gideon dad?"
Jared nods but doesn't say anything.
Caroline smiles and leans forward, "There is a lot to unpack here, a lot has happened today which you need to process properly or you are going to have issues moving forward. If possible, I'd like to talk with you in private… just us – or with Gideon also present if you prefer so we can talk about it in more detail".
"Ok" Jared says and he reaches for my hand again. "Will you come with me…? When I talk about the video… I'll need you" he says.
I nod and squeeze his hand, "I've got you" I reiterate.
(CAROLINE)
I am astounded by the events which Jared has just revealed. Christian had called me when they left Chicago and asked me to be here when they arrived. When I got here Ana and Eva were here and since then we have been getting a drip feed of information from the security here, but nothing significant until everyone's phones started pinging with alerts. Eva confirmed that the media were now aware of Jared after an incident in Chicago which had also involved Gideon's step-father, which admittedly threw me but then I remembered Gideon had told me that after he had signed over Vidal Records to Christopher he had moved to Chicago where he has family.
Jared is clearly conflicted about calling Gideon dad. He is worried that what he has done will bring trouble on to the family with the media now being aware of him and it seems he also has concerns that this could bring his birth mother into the picture. One thing I got loud and clear from the altercation with Chris Vidal is that Jared feels a degree of moral outrage on Gideon's behalf. He was angry at Chris and used the opportunity of having him face to face to tell him what he thought about him and how he had, in Jared's mind, failed Gideon. Jared is clearly confused by his feelings; he has obviously formed a strong bond with Gideon but there is a part of him which feels by doing so is disrespecting his adoptive father in some way. I am concerned about the video that Jared saw, it clearly showed some very distressing footage and I am worried that this may have some lasting effect on him.
It was clear from the moment I met Gideon that he had an iron will and he had used it as he had ruthlessly suppressed the events of his childhood and compartmentalised them, partly due to the fact he hadn't been given the opportunity to work through them and when he had spoken of them he had been called a liar. That had resulted in the memories surfacing when he was at his most vulnerable, when he was sleeping in the form of nightmares. Something which with my help he is now trying to rectify and eliminate. Hearing Jared talk about today, it is clear he has inherited his father's iron will, and he too was compartmentalising the traumatic events of today and supressing them by focussing on other things he wanted to do while in Chicago. Therefore, I think it is imperative that we discuss and process what Jared saw in that video so he doesn't end up tormented by nightmares, like his father. I wonder briefly if what he saw in that video also has some bearing on his guilt for calling Gideon dad, but I am determined to help him make sense of everything that has happened today.
I also idly wonder about the significance of Gideon's repeated comment 'I've got you' it appears it is something of significance between Gideon and Jared and wonder what that is and if it could hold any explanation. I recall Gideon's expression when Jared was talking and each time he called him Gideon, the hurt in his eyes and look of disappointment. It appears that the fact Jared called him dad is something of great importance to him, but equally he doesn't want to force him to call him dad if he isn't comfortable doing so.
We go into the comfortable study and I thank Christian as he leaves us.
"Let's sit down" I say.
I watch as Gideon takes a seat on the sofa and Jared immediately sits beside him and reaches for his hand. This is an ongoing theme with Jared, he seems to need that physical contact. I can't work out whether it is simple reassurance or there is a deeper significance of him unconsciously holding on to Gideon so he doesn't leave, which is understandable under the circumstances of the fact he has lost his parents and guardians so suddenly and violently in a short space of time. The evening when he first arrived in Seattle, I came to the conclusion it was reassurance his parents were dead, his aunt and uncle had been violently murdered and Christian had come to the rescue. He needed a parental figure and at that time while Gideon was on video call with him reassuring him that he was on his way to him, Christian was physically there and Jared was determined to make sure that he wasn't going anywhere.
"Alright then, first of all I'd like to talk about your time at the site of your parent's death" I begin.
Jared looks at me and nods, "Ok" he says.
"How did it feel being there? Where it happened?" I ask.
Jared thinks about that, "I wanted to remember something, I wanted to remember all I could so that the guy who did it would be punished. I was disappointed because I didn't remember that much though" he says.
I nod, "How did you do it?" I ask.
"I retraced my steps, we walked the route that we walked on that day, we started at the car park where dad left his car and we walked the route round by the river and to where it happened" he says.
I nod and make notes on what Jared is telling me, "How did you feel about doing that?" I ask.
Jared shrugs, "I needed to do it. I didn't really feel anything much till we got to where it happened. I remembered that dad used to love walking by the river in Chicago, we walked down there loads… I think I said that didn't I?" he says as he looks up at Gideon who nods.
"You did" he says simply and then he looks across at me. "I was worried about doing what we did, I didn't want to retraumatise him, but Jared was adamant he wanted to do it so I decided the best thing I could do was just be there and support him. He chatted and made little remarks about how he'd go walks with his dad along by the river".
Jared is listening and smiles at Gideon, "But then we came to the junction and it made me remember I'd seen that guy's car" he says.
"How did that make you feel, to remember that?" I ask.
Jared's smile fades and he sighs, "It felt like a jolt, I saw in my head the car driving slowly past us and then going past us again a few minutes later".
"Jared was very composed and incredibly brave doing what he did, the only time I saw any distress was when we were near the place his parents died, as we walked along that road, his breathing became increasingly erratic as though he was about to have a panic attack and I was ready to bring a halt to proceedings when he stopped and told us we were at the spot where it happened" Gideon says, looking at Jared with unconcealed pride.
I nod, and look at Jared questioningly.
He licks his lips, "When we got… there, I remembered… I remembered coming round and the police, uncle Phil and the paramedics… I remembered how I asked about my mom and dad because my mom wasn't there and my dad… he… they had zipped up the big black body bag and my dad was in it… that was what I was remembering".
Jared's eyes harden and he clenches his fist, "He told me he was sorry, he put his arm around me and told me everything would be ok, when he was the one who killed her".
I wait for him to continue and I realise that he is now remembering the video he saw at the police station and those images are now melding with his own memories of that day.
This is confirmed by what he says next, "My dad was shot, but he got in the way – I don't think that guy intentionally wanted to shoot him, you could see that by the look of shock on his face after my dad's head blew apart. But Uncle Phil… he just pushed my dad's body away and he pointed his gun at my mom, she was looking at him… she was looking right at him and he just shot her. He didn't even kill her though, he just hurt her and made her suffer, if he wanted to do it, he should've at least done it properly and not let her suffer as she died later, she fought to survive… she fought but she died, and then he had the nerve to put his arm around me and comfort me when he'd done that".
Jared sobs and Gideon immediately reacts and wraps his arm around Jared.
"Ok Jared just take a moment" I say.
To my surprise he looks up at Gideon, and grips his arm "Promise me Gideon, promise me he will be put away and he will never hurt anyone again, please do everything to make sure he rots in prison" Jared says angrily.
Gideon nods, "I will do everything I can to make sure that happens" he says simply.
That was interesting, he has made the connection that Gideon is his best ally to have to make sure his uncle is held to account for what he did.
"So, after you left the scene of the crime you went to the police station is that correct?" I ask.
Jared nods, "Yeah, I told them everything I knew and everything I remembered and I gave them the photograph I took of the guy's car, the one I took when he was parked up outside our home, here in Seattle when he came to kill my aunt and uncle".
"I see" I say.
Jared nods, "Yeah, Christian and Gideon were with me and Christian asked if the street camera had been accessed. I got the impression that it hadn't as the detective looked dead shifty when Christian asked him that and he made this vague comment which didn't really say anything. But a moment later this other detective came in and said that he needed to speak to him. Then we were told that someone had come forward with some CCTV footage from a nearby building… I wanted to see it, I wanted to see exactly what had happened because I was unconscious and I didn't really know what had happened to them. I needed to know, everyone said I shouldn't see it. Angus practically begged me not to watch it so I knew it was going to be bad… I didn't think it would be that bad though".
"Do you regret watching it?" I ask.
Jared shrugs, "Kind of… in a way yes because it was bad, but it was bad in a kind of surreal way. It was like what you see in films but… it was real. Like I said to you on the phone it didn't feel real at the time as I was watching it. It felt like I was watching a movie but now, now I know everything and it was real and my mom and dad really did die in that way. But in another way… no I don't regret it because now I know the truth and I know how my mom and dad died, if I hadn't seen it, I would've always wondered and I think that would've been worse… I just need to stop seeing it in my head now".
"Alright, I'll give you some exercises to try and help with that and we will continue to talk about it as well to help with that" I say.
"Thank you" Jared says.
"So, you left the police station, what happened then?" I ask.
Jared smiles shyly and an almost sheepish look comes over his face. "I did something I really needed to do, as well as going to talk to the police it was my other main reason for wanting to go back to Chicago" he says.
"Which was?" I ask.
Jared takes a deep breath, "Return to my old home… where I lived with my mom and dad. I wanted to go back one last time, and there was something I really needed to do while I was there, something I should've done before now".
"Did you share this reason with Gideon before you went?" I ask, although I'm fairly sure I know the answer will be no.
That is confirmed when Jared shakes his head, "No, I didn't want to mention it" he says.
"Why?" I ask, and I see Gideon focus completely on Jared, he is clearly interested to know why Jared didn't tell him about this.
Jared licks his lips and shrugs, "I felt like it was a bit selfish… I mean, asking Gideon to take me to Chicago, just so I could scatter my dog's ashes, it sounds really self-indulgent, plus I wasn't even sure if they'd still be there. That's why I really wanted to make sure there was a better reason to go as well, to make the trip worthwhile" he says.
Gideon's expression softens and he increases his grip on Jared.
"You should've told me; I wouldn't have minded in the slightest and we could've gone sooner" he says.
I smile "How did it feel being back at your old family home?" I ask.
Jared smiles, "A bit surreal, I felt like I was home… but not really. I just wanted to see the place again one last time and I really needed to scatter my dogs' ashes".
"So, talk me through that" I say.
Jared sighs, "We got out of the car and the first thing I did was check the apple tree – dad and I planted it after the one which was there before it died and had to be cut down. Christian came and looked at it with me and told me about the orchard he is restoring at his birth family's home. He said he'd take me to see it sometime. Then I went round the back of the house, into the garden. I went to my treehouse and I was so relieved that the wooden chest my dad made was still there, which meant that Oscar's ashes would still probably be there and they were. I got them and Gideon asked me if I wanted to take the chest, I really did but wasn't sure how I'd get it out of there. Gideon roped in Angus and Jason and Jason came up and he and Gideon managed to lower it out of the treehouse down to Angus who was waiting below. I grabbed Oscar's ashes and went to his favourite spot in the garden to scatter them. Gideon joined me and asked me who it was and I told him. I explained what the plan originally was how my dad was going to carve a wooden dog, from a photograph I have of Oscar and we were going to put it there where I'd scattered his ashes… but that's not going to happen now. But I'm really glad I scattered them, as that was his favourite spot".
"So, after doing that how did you feel?" I ask.
Jared smiles, "I felt a sense of closure… completion. I'd done it and it felt right. I felt I could go now but then Gideon did something totally amazing, while we were scattering Oscar's ashes, he got Christian to call the realtor and buy the house".
"And let's be clear on this Jared, that is your home" Gideon says. "I bought it but it will always be yours" he says.
Jared shrugs, "I know my life has now changed completely and that I will be going with Gideon to New York to live with him and Eva but I'm so happy that Gideon did that, because I never want to forget my mom and dad and now, I will always have that link with them".
Gideon shakes his head, "They were your parents, I would never presume to take their place or expect to replace them" he says.
Jared looks at him, "But you are my dad too" he says.
Gideon takes in a harsh breath at those words and swallows deeply.
I watch as Jared seems to suddenly realise something. I watch as he seems to make the realisations and work things out in his head and I realise he is having a breakthrough moment. I wait patiently for him to speak.
"I'm not betraying my mom and dad by calling Gideon dad, because it's a fact… he is, he is my dad. It was Gideon who originally helped to create me and through no fault of his he didn't know about me until now. It was Corrine's fault he didn't know about me… Corrine isn't my mom though, never has been and never will be… all she was… was an incubator, she doesn't deserve to be called mom. Mom is my only mom. Corrine didn't want me and she lied to everyone about me and she never told dad… about me and that is wrong, she should've told him. But Mom and dad wanted me, and they raised me and loved me but now they are gone. But, and this is the really important thing, Gideon has stepped right up and he wants me, he wants me just like mom and dad wanted me, and in the short time I've known him he has pulled out all the stops and gone way above and beyond what was expected of him… he has behaved just like my mom and dad did all my life till they died… he put me first… but he was willing to share me with Uncle Pete and Aunty Suzy because he wanted what was best for me… just like my dad always did, and at that point in time being with Uncle Pete and Aunty Suzy was the right thing so there is no reason why I should feel as though I'm betraying my dad's memory because my dad loved me he was my dad and deserved that title, but I can't call him dad anymore because he isn't here anymore, but that doesn't ever stop him being my dad… Gideon… Gideon also deserves that title and he is here right now and wants the job of being my dad, so… can… can I call you dad?" he asks.
Gideon's reaction to that is almost violent, he sweeps Jared into his arms and holds him tightly.
"I love you dad" I hear Jared whisper and I find myself blinking rapidly and swallowing hard trying to maintain my professional composure. Gideon says something but I don't catch what it is and I realise that Gideon needs this moment as much as Jared, all his life he has been pushed aside and made a scapegoat for other people. Eva was the first person who came into his life and wanted him and more importantly put him first, then Christian and Ana came and accepted him into their lives along with all the Grey family, I remember how he had told me how much it had affected him when Elliot's daughter Ava had called him Uncle Gideon… and now Jared has told him he wants him and has accepted him as his father. Which makes my mind move on to the altercation with Chris Vidal.
I don't want to intrude on this moment between father and son and I wait until they pull apart. As they do so I clear my throat and they both look at me.
"That is what we call a breakthrough" I say with a smile. "If we could return to the events of today?" I ask gently and Jared nods, but before I can say anything else he holds up his hand.
"I… can I just ask something?" he says.
"Of course" I say and he turns towards Gideon with a look of determination on his face and Gideon senses this is something significant and he gives him his complete attention.
"Would it be possible? I don't know how these things work… but… now I've worked all this out in my head and you're ok with it…"
"I'm more than ok with it" Gideon puts in.
Jared grins at him, "So… I mean it's clear the world now knows you're my dad as well… so… if it's ok with you, I'd like to take your surname… not instead of mine, but as well as mine?"
Gideon, takes a harsh breath in at that and then beams at him, "I would be honoured" he says simply. "If that is what you want then we can make that happen" he says.
"So… I'd be Jared Martin-Cross" he confirms.
Gideon grins even more, "Kind of has a ring to it" he says.
Jared lets out a long sigh, "Ok… back to today" he says as he turns his attention to me once more.
He reaches for Gideon again, who doesn't hesitate to offer him his hand.
"When we had finished scattering Oscar's ashes and dad had told me what he had done… you know buying the house, we went to the car and we saw Angus and Jason struggling to put the chest in the car" he pauses and grins, before letting out a small snigger, "I said to dad that it could've stayed in the treehouse and he said that we'd keep that to ourselves. So, then I remembered I wanted to get Ana a birthday card and there was a shop just down the road from the house so Gideon and I walked down there with Christian and I went to pick a card. I saw the chocolates and I asked Christian if Ana would like them and he said she would and so I thought I'd get them as well. As we were leaving, this guy came in and dad just froze on the spot, I thought something had happened and then I saw the guy do the same thing and they just stared at each other for a moment. Christian came up alongside dad almost like he was protecting him, then the guy spoke and Christian replied and that was when I realised who it was. Dad had told me what had happened to him, and the way that… man was looking at him, like he was dirt… it wasn't right. It made me so mad, I felt like I needed to tell this guy he was the one who was in the wrong, not dad… so I did, and he asked me who I was and I said I'm his son. He didn't seem surprised by that and then he said something which confirmed he knew about me and that he knew the truth about me".
"What did he say?" I ask.
Jared frowns as he tries to remember, "He said… he called me Corrine's brat and then he taunted dad saying so you found out about him then… or something like that. That shocked all of us, and dad lost it and went to punch him. Christian told him not to but he wasn't listening so I grabbed his arm and tried to stop him and that's when I called him dad for the first time… it just came out and it felt… right".
I glance at Gideon who has gone very quiet, "Do you have anything you want to add Gideon?" I ask.
I see the shame written all over Gideon's face, "I shouldn't have done that, lost control like that. I never lose control like that. I have no idea what possessed me and to do it and to do it in front of my son not to mention in a public place, what kind of father does that make me if I can't be a good role model to him?" he says.
Jared shakes his head adamantly, "No, dad. Don't! He was the one in the wrong, he had just told you that he knew about me and more importantly from what he said he knew the truth… not the lies Corrine gave my mom and dad and that French guy. How else were you going to react to hearing something like that?! He knew the truth, and he kept it from you, and my guess is that is why you reacted violently and out of character, because his actions affected not only you but me as well, because it prevented me knowing you… so like how I was angry at him on your behalf you were angry at him on mine. From what you've told me about him, he knew the truth about a lot of other stuff, but he still blamed you… and that's not right, so that's why I was angry at him. He was supposed to be your dad, he took on that role and he screwed it up… if anyone is a bad role model it's him. He should never be anybody's dad because he failed you in every way possible… just like Uncle Phil failed me and lied to me and blamed me for stuff which wasn't my fault and that's before we even get to how he betrayed my mom and dad. Uncle Phil is going to get what is coming to him, and that guy Chris… well, look at his life now. He has lost his family, he lost his kids because your brother and sister believe you now and disowned him so he is on his own with nothing which is nothing more than he deserves… so as I said to you in the shop… he's not worth it, so stop beating yourself up about how you reacted because you are worth a million of him".
My mouth drops open at the maturity and astuteness of this young boy, I have no idea what to say as Jared has said it all.
"I think that is a good place to leave it" I say eventually.
Gideon nods, "I agree" he says hoarsely.