Meet Cement, an 8-year-old boy who lives in Tennessee. One night a falling
star hit him on the head, and a gash the size of a peanut smashed in his
head. Now a little voice called Billy controls his mind. Billy has been
telling Cement to wipe his butt in Death Valley, California. This is his
journey.
"Momma, can you drive me to Death Valley?"
"Why Cement?"
"Billy tells things, he wants to go to Death Valley."
"N.......o"
"Going to hitch hike then."
"No you ain't."
"Yes I ain't going to listen to you." So first Cement tried to run away with an icebox, that sadly failed. Then he asked for help at school, sadly his friend told him only this. Your family tree never splits. so I guess you're a redneck. Sadly he cried in a corner for 3 days not listening to Billy's command of wiping his ass in Death Valley.
"Momma."
"NO."
"Please."
"No."
"Why."
"No."
"Can I have a dog?"
"No."
"Then can I go to Death Valley?"
"Sure.. wait no." It was to late Billy I mean Cement was walking to the bus station. With a roll of toilet paper in his head, he won at the state fair wrestling with pigs.
To the bus station a voice always told him, he got on the bus and finally he sat down next to a French man.
"Bonjour," said the French man, "Jed m'appelle Francoise. Je suis vient du Paris." Looking up with boggled eyes, then said "Don't know Italian."
"Je suis alle a Death Valley. Oui ton alle, mon petit japanois- americain cou de rouge garcon?"
Cement leaves and buys an Italian dictionary, then sits back down and notices the pumpkin in the French man's lap.
"Where u get that pumpkin Mr."
The French man just stared at him and then slow picked up the pumpkin and throws it at the window. This of caused the window to shatter all over the French man. He was still staring at Cement, repeating "Je suis alle a Death Valley."
Cement looked at his dictionary trying to find what it means, after searching the book for 5 minutes he looked at the cover: Learn Italian.not French. Cement was so angry he hit this old lady in the head at the book. This caused the lady to fall into a coma and it this point of time she is in the hospital in San Francisco; he family is waiting for her to wake up. But as we all know people in a coma go to a small city in the back of there mind that any thought about as kids. As they get to the gates they think to themselves they have seen this before. A creature that looks like a 500 pound man with horns coming out of his ass and 1 leg with the name of Caption Wager of the 51st air born dwarf pirates. But we all know that Dwarfs hate water so instead they use midgets that are in a nice way we say large. But this is a different story.
The bus stopped, Cement got out with the voice in the back of his head yelling at him telling him to buy some pickles and get that dog u always wanted. The French man now was leaving the bus with a mink fur around his neck and a leather cap that old airplane pilots had on his head. In his left hand was a small object that looked like a pen, but it truth it was a pickle.
The voice Billy was telling him to steal the pickle, but Cement is scared of people with furs that walk in the streets so instead he ran, only to remember he was 240 pounds at the age of 8 which in some cases people would call fat but his momma would call it husky. The French man was "stalking" him you could say, but really the French man was visiting his grandma which was German and had 6 toes 1 eye and a claw and a fork for her hands. Also I should note that his grandpa died is a freak police miss under standing when he shot him in the legs 24 times and then clubbed him, but it turned out they got the wrong man, so now this man that stole 100 penny's from the penny bank is still out, most likely swimming in 100 pennies. But his grandpa was killed by a wad of dough that hit him at 90mph from 2 feet away he was walking past a bakers shop.
So Cement heard the voice tell him to stop, and start to dig. The French man started digging 15 feet away. (And yes the French man's grandma lived under ground with a group of moles called the fuzzy in the ass) After 78 days 23 minutes and 12 seconds later. Lets also note 300 candy bars 12 cups of coffee and about 90 big kids meals he hit a metal object shaped like a well a thing. He picked it up, 1978 dwarf of the year award for being the dirtiest horniest Dwarf in Japan.
"STOP"
"What"
"That's what I want"
"You want a trophies for being dirty and horny."
"It's for my dad."
"No it ain't your daddy is my daddy and we all know he died."
"Well were I live he hasn't died yet, he is still walking down the round with his pistol in his hand."
"Oh, here you go."
"Wait, are your ready?"
"For what?"
"You know you told me to come here so I can wipe my ass and stick it to that rock."
"Ummm ok, go ahead." "ALL Done." "Good lets go."
They climbed onto the bus with no French man this time only an old lady that looked like she was well old and she just came back from the state fair. They got off the bus and walked into the house. Right away Cement was hit by a golf ball that came from his mother's 4 wood club. Cement missing 5 teeth his brain turned to jelly, this caused that voice Billy to die, and if Billy dies Cement dies. So 1 week later a man from Sweden came to the door with flowers, but really there was a gun inside, it turns out the man Cements papa killed had a brother that lived the attack only missing half of his leg and half of his head, this caused him to be slow, but his mom not seeing that was going to kill her greeted him and then died. Just then at that moment the bullet hit the mom the mail man yellow pulled out a sniper rifle and killed the Swedish man. The mail man went on a killing ranpage and killed 400 people with the help of a dwarf named sally, sally was a female, but dwarfs all have beards they just have to deside later in life is they wanna be a female, because they all are born males.
With the first hour gone by and 400 people dead the mail man was killed only the police found out that the bullets were made of silly puddy, so that means the people are alive, and the mail man dead.
Well that is the end of my story so leave.
"Momma, can you drive me to Death Valley?"
"Why Cement?"
"Billy tells things, he wants to go to Death Valley."
"N.......o"
"Going to hitch hike then."
"No you ain't."
"Yes I ain't going to listen to you." So first Cement tried to run away with an icebox, that sadly failed. Then he asked for help at school, sadly his friend told him only this. Your family tree never splits. so I guess you're a redneck. Sadly he cried in a corner for 3 days not listening to Billy's command of wiping his ass in Death Valley.
"Momma."
"NO."
"Please."
"No."
"Why."
"No."
"Can I have a dog?"
"No."
"Then can I go to Death Valley?"
"Sure.. wait no." It was to late Billy I mean Cement was walking to the bus station. With a roll of toilet paper in his head, he won at the state fair wrestling with pigs.
To the bus station a voice always told him, he got on the bus and finally he sat down next to a French man.
"Bonjour," said the French man, "Jed m'appelle Francoise. Je suis vient du Paris." Looking up with boggled eyes, then said "Don't know Italian."
"Je suis alle a Death Valley. Oui ton alle, mon petit japanois- americain cou de rouge garcon?"
Cement leaves and buys an Italian dictionary, then sits back down and notices the pumpkin in the French man's lap.
"Where u get that pumpkin Mr."
The French man just stared at him and then slow picked up the pumpkin and throws it at the window. This of caused the window to shatter all over the French man. He was still staring at Cement, repeating "Je suis alle a Death Valley."
Cement looked at his dictionary trying to find what it means, after searching the book for 5 minutes he looked at the cover: Learn Italian.not French. Cement was so angry he hit this old lady in the head at the book. This caused the lady to fall into a coma and it this point of time she is in the hospital in San Francisco; he family is waiting for her to wake up. But as we all know people in a coma go to a small city in the back of there mind that any thought about as kids. As they get to the gates they think to themselves they have seen this before. A creature that looks like a 500 pound man with horns coming out of his ass and 1 leg with the name of Caption Wager of the 51st air born dwarf pirates. But we all know that Dwarfs hate water so instead they use midgets that are in a nice way we say large. But this is a different story.
The bus stopped, Cement got out with the voice in the back of his head yelling at him telling him to buy some pickles and get that dog u always wanted. The French man now was leaving the bus with a mink fur around his neck and a leather cap that old airplane pilots had on his head. In his left hand was a small object that looked like a pen, but it truth it was a pickle.
The voice Billy was telling him to steal the pickle, but Cement is scared of people with furs that walk in the streets so instead he ran, only to remember he was 240 pounds at the age of 8 which in some cases people would call fat but his momma would call it husky. The French man was "stalking" him you could say, but really the French man was visiting his grandma which was German and had 6 toes 1 eye and a claw and a fork for her hands. Also I should note that his grandpa died is a freak police miss under standing when he shot him in the legs 24 times and then clubbed him, but it turned out they got the wrong man, so now this man that stole 100 penny's from the penny bank is still out, most likely swimming in 100 pennies. But his grandpa was killed by a wad of dough that hit him at 90mph from 2 feet away he was walking past a bakers shop.
So Cement heard the voice tell him to stop, and start to dig. The French man started digging 15 feet away. (And yes the French man's grandma lived under ground with a group of moles called the fuzzy in the ass) After 78 days 23 minutes and 12 seconds later. Lets also note 300 candy bars 12 cups of coffee and about 90 big kids meals he hit a metal object shaped like a well a thing. He picked it up, 1978 dwarf of the year award for being the dirtiest horniest Dwarf in Japan.
"STOP"
"What"
"That's what I want"
"You want a trophies for being dirty and horny."
"It's for my dad."
"No it ain't your daddy is my daddy and we all know he died."
"Well were I live he hasn't died yet, he is still walking down the round with his pistol in his hand."
"Oh, here you go."
"Wait, are your ready?"
"For what?"
"You know you told me to come here so I can wipe my ass and stick it to that rock."
"Ummm ok, go ahead." "ALL Done." "Good lets go."
They climbed onto the bus with no French man this time only an old lady that looked like she was well old and she just came back from the state fair. They got off the bus and walked into the house. Right away Cement was hit by a golf ball that came from his mother's 4 wood club. Cement missing 5 teeth his brain turned to jelly, this caused that voice Billy to die, and if Billy dies Cement dies. So 1 week later a man from Sweden came to the door with flowers, but really there was a gun inside, it turns out the man Cements papa killed had a brother that lived the attack only missing half of his leg and half of his head, this caused him to be slow, but his mom not seeing that was going to kill her greeted him and then died. Just then at that moment the bullet hit the mom the mail man yellow pulled out a sniper rifle and killed the Swedish man. The mail man went on a killing ranpage and killed 400 people with the help of a dwarf named sally, sally was a female, but dwarfs all have beards they just have to deside later in life is they wanna be a female, because they all are born males.
With the first hour gone by and 400 people dead the mail man was killed only the police found out that the bullets were made of silly puddy, so that means the people are alive, and the mail man dead.
Well that is the end of my story so leave.