Hello everyone. Time for the second installment of "The Truth About Men." Hope you enjoyed the first one. Now, here's some dirt on pretty boy Draco (personally one of my favorite characters :) Anyway, remember to review. It really makes my day better.

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or the song. I'm just using this as a way to vent frustrating feelings about a certain person I know. No harm meant if you are reading this, Boo.

Hermione's Story (a.k.a Draco's Fall From Grace)

The Truth About Men:

♪ We don't like to go out shopping. ♪

♪ We don't care what's on sale. ♪

♪ We just want to sit with a bag full of chips, watching the NFL. ♪

♪ When you come over at halftime and say does this dress fit too tight, ♪

♪ We just look you in the eye with a big fat lie and say uh-uh looks just right. ♪

"The last time there was a big game coming up, it was the day of mine and Draco's anniversary." Hermione said. "I had planned a nice evening here for us. You know, something sweet and romantic. I even went out and bought a new dress to wear for the special occasion. It was slinky and a little more daring than normal, at least by my standards. So, by the time he gets home, everything is ready. Candles, dinner, the whole she-bang."

"What went wrong?" Pansy asked. "Sounds like you had everything planned out okay."

"The Wimbourn Wasps and Bristol Banshees game was what happened." Hermione said, rolling her eyes at the memory. "Draco comes home and brings half his department at the Ministry with him."

"You're kidding, right?" Susan asked. "He brought them here on his anniversary night?" The other women looked shocked, but Susan was trying to hide a small smile that threatened to break loose.

"Yes." Hermione said. "And he didn't even have the brains to tell me that he was planning on spending the evening with his buddies. You know, I'm not a stickler for important dates. Up until that point, he had forgotten my birthday almost every year, and I let him get away with it. But I was NOT about to let him forget our anniversary."

" I went into the kitchen to get something to drink and to get away from all of the racket they were causing. He came in and gave me a kiss hello, never even noticing the set up in the dining room. He took one look at my dress, furrowed his eyebrows, and asks me if I was planning on going out tonight with some of my friends. And that if I was, I should have told him sooner." The woman were wide eyed and amazed that the one man who helped over throw Voldemort would be stupid enough to make Hermione mad by forgetting their anniversary.

"I hope you made him pay dearly for that one." Padma snickered, picturing the torture Hermione could inflict on her husband.

"Oh, I did." she said with a smirk. "While he and his buddies were watching the game, I nicked his wand from his robes. When everyone left after the game, Draco, oh so tired from his day at work, tried to get ready for bed, but he couldn't get into any rooms other than the living room. I'd locked all of them with a spell of my own. He couldn't find his own wand, and he didn't realize that I had taken it. Then, he finally figured out that I was mad at him at some point during the night."

"Did you let him in the bedroom?" Pansy asked quickly, enjoying the torment her ex-boyfriend had gone through.

"Of course not. He spent the night on the couch, in the living room, in that disgusting mess they had made that evening." she said.

"Ewwwwww. I bet he was mad." Ginny smiled.

"I'll bet mad doesn't even begin to cover it." Padma snickered.

"Well, I'm guessing he figured out what he'd done, because he apologized the next morning for forgetting our anniversary." Hermione smiled. "I even had a beautiful bouquet of roses to help with the apology."

"And I bet you let him right off of the hook." Susan said.

"Nope. He spent the next week trying to get out of the doghouse."

"How long did it take him to get back into his own bed?" Padma asked.

"A week and a half after the game, he finally got back in there." Hermione said with a smirk.

"Oh, man. A week and a half of not getting any," Pansy smirked. "That's unnecessary cruelty for a guy, especially one like Draco."

"Yeah," Hermione agreed. "But I got my point across."

"How do you figure?" Pansy asked.

"He hasn't forgotten another important date since then. He even asked if I had anything planned for tonight before asking the boys over. Wanted to make sure that there wasn't a repeat performance from the last game day." she said with a wide grin. The girls burst out laughing and didn't stop even when the tears were rolling down their faces. A few minutes later, Blaise stuck his head in through the doors and frowned.

"Is everything okay in here?" he asked, staring at the women like they were crazy. Pansy grinned and looked at her husband with a sweet smile.

"We're fine, baby. Hermione was telling us about her latest cooking attempt." Pansy said. Blaise looked dubious, but didn't question her answer. It was probably true, because everyone knew that Hermione was a wonderful witch, but a horrid cook.

"Oh. Okay." he said, looking at the grinning witches. "Are you sure everything is fine?"

"We're fine, Blaise." Ginny said. "Go watch the game before Puddlemere's Seeker catches the Snitch." Blaise glared at her.

"Puddlemere will not win this match." he growled. "At least they better not. I've got 300 galleons riding on the Canons." Pansy narrowed her eyes and Blaise quickly covered his mouth with his hands. "Oops." he muttered as Pansy stood from the couch.

"Blaise Trenton Zabini!!!" she said forcefully. "Have you been betting on the matches again?" Blaise actually quivered in his shoes at the look of fierceness on her face.

"Uh, gotta go ladies. Don't want to miss Puddlemere catching that Snitch." He turned around and fled back to the living room, with Pansy glaring at the swinging door he had exited. When they thought she was going to tear through the door after him, Pansy suddenly smiled and sat back down.

"Well, that got rid of him." she said smoothly. "Don't get me wrong, I love the man to death, but he can get really annoying at times." The women smiled and nodded.

"I'll say." Susan said. "You need to find a way to bottle that glare and sell it. It'll go like butterbeer."

"Thanks," Pansy said. "He makes me so mad sometimes. He loves to bet on the Quidditch matches. And to save his life, he couldn't pick a winning team. The last time he went out, oh boy did he catch it when he got home and I found out about it."

"Geez, Pansy," Hermione said. "What'd he do?"

"Well......"

Special thanks to hermione for being my first reviewer. I bestow upon you all the riches that the world of fanfiction has to offer. :) :) Kudos to Emma() also for reviewing.

So, anyone really curious as to what Blaise did that made Pansy so angry? Huh, huh, bet you can't guess. Leave me your thoughts and lets see who is the closest. Review, review, review, and tell me if this is remotely funny to anyone other than myself.