(Review of Ch. 1 - Kinie had accidentally blown up Mako Reactor #5 in
Midgar while they were heading toward Gold Saucer.)
Chapter 2 - Gold Saucer's New Attraction
Tifa: Kinie, welcome to Gold Saucer!
Kinie: Look at all the lights! It looks like Las Vegas!
Everyone: Las? Vegas???
Kinie: Nevermind.
They dock the Highwind and proceed to the entrance.
Kinie: OK everyone, remember where we parked.
Everyone: ???
Kinie: Nevermind.
Ticketseller: Welcome to Gold Saucer. A ticket costs 3,000 GP. A gold ticket costs 30,000 GP, and you can use it again and again, like a lifetime pass, as long as you have it.
Cloud: Here's our gold tickets.
The seller lets them all by, but when Kinie tries to go through, she stops him.
Ticketseller: I'm sorry, sir, but you can't go through.
Kinie: Why not?
Ticketseller: you don't have a gold ticket.
Kinie: Well, can I see one? You'll have it back in a minute, I swear. I won't steal it.
Ticketseller: Well, OK. I don't see any harm in that.
Kinie grabs the gold ticket, takes out his drawing pad, and starts to draw. A minute later, he has an exact copy of the ticket on paper. All of a sudden, there's the gold ticket that he drew in the air. He grabs it, and gives back the original one.
Kinie: Here you go. Thanks!
Ticketseller (bugging out): Uh, Uh . That's it, I'm switching to de-CAF.
Kinie: So, Yuffie, what can you do at Gold Saucer?
Yuffie: Oh, you can do almost anything! They have a Ferris wheel, a roller coaster, a monster battle arena, a chocobo racing track and several simulation games that range from raising moogles to racing motorcycles.
Cait Sith: Hey, look! (Points up). They just opened a new attraction. Why don't we go there first before the line gets too big?
Cloud: That sounds like a good idea.
So they all head to the new attraction. It turns out to be a gigantic.
Kinie: Paintball arena? Oh, that's rich! Their new attraction is paintball? Ha!
Barret: What're you babbling about? This thing is brand new! No one's even heard of it before!
Kinie: Yeah, right. And I'm the Queen of England!
Everyone: Queen? England?
Kinie: Nevermind.
Cashier: Uh, hello? Can I help you people?
Cloud: Oh, yeah, can please have 10 paintball guns?
Cashier: I'm sorry, but we only have 2 left. If you can go and defeat the other guys in there, then you can play.
Cloud: How many are in there right now?
Cashier: 2, but they're not normal people. They've won every prize today. We've got a huge prize for the person that can defeat them.
Cloud: OK, we'll but those 2 guns.
Cashier: OK that'll be 500 GP.
Cloud: Here's 750 GP. Keep the change.
Cashier: Thanks! Now, each gun has 1,000 shots. If you get hit, you're out. Don't worry, they don't hurt. All they do is bruise the skin.
Cloud: OK, thanks. Cid: So, Cloud, who are you gonna' send in to kick some ass?
Cloud: Vincent, and . Kinie.
Kinie: Me?
Cid: What?! That punk? He f****** pisses me off! I don't like him!
Cloud: I would've sent in Barret, but he can only use his gattling gun to shoot stuff with. So, I'm sending him in because he's the only only with gun experience.
Kinie: But, I don't know a thing about guns.
They fall over, anime style.
Vincent: Well, since you carry a gun, it's only natural to assume you know how to use it. We might as well try our best.
So Vincent and Kinie go into the arena. The others watch from an observatory near the top of the arena. They decide to split up so that they can get this over with faster. Several hours pass before Kinie and Vincent meet again.
Vincent: Man, these guys are good. They really are giving me a run for the money. I've got 100 shots left, how about you Kinie?
Kinie: 1,000.
Vincent: What?! You haven't taken a single shot?
Kinie: I don't really like guns.
Vincent: You are so pathetic. Huh? What's that moving to your right, about 10 meters away? I'm going to find out.
Vincent gets up, and dashes over to try and shoot one of the guys left. A minute later, several dozen shots ring out. Kinie sees that Vincent and one of the other guys is out. So, after the two leave, he walks out into an open area. The other guy steps out from behind a wall.
Mysterious Man: So, Kinie. We meet again.
Kinie: Wait, I know that voice. Andy? Andy is that you? I thought you were dead?
Andy: Well, your aim was a little off. You never did like to kill people, did you? I don't have a problem with death, so now it's payback time! Die, Kinie, die!
Andy fires a shot straight at Kinie. He steps to the side, leaving only 2 hairs floating where he was a second ago. The rest of the party is surprised because they don't know how a buffoon could move that fast.
Kinie: (sweatdrop with bugged out eyes) SSSCCCAAARRRYYYY!!!
Andy: Well, you may have dodged one shot. But how about 5 shots?
Andy pulls back his coat, revealing 4 more paintball guns.
Kinie: Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!!!!!
Kinie runs around, acting like the buffoon that he is, while avoiding all of Andy's shots. He shoots 5 shots at Andy, with each shot going into the barrel of the gun, jamming the guns.
Andy: Ahaha,ahaha,ahahaha . huh? Why have the guns stopped firing?
Kinie quickly runs up to Andy, and before he shoots him in the arm, says.
Kinie: You lose.
A few seconds later.
Cashier: Winner, Kinie!
After Kinie leaves the arena, he goes over to the cashier to collect his reward.
Cashier: Here's your prize, Mr. Kinie.
Kinie: What, a gigantic red jewel?
Yuffie: T-That's a master summon materia! You can summon any summon monster now to kick some monster ass in battle.
Kinie: Oh, that's why there's a big red monster that's on fire standing behind the other guy.
Ifrit uses Hellfire on the guy, burning him to a crisp.
Andy: Oh my God, Kinie! You killed Alex!
Kinie: That was Alex? Man, he lost some weight.
Andy: Now I have to kill you because you killed Alex!!
Andy takes out his gun. Kinie pulls out his, and shoots his gun out of his hand. The bullet goes flying off toward the Ferris wheel.
Andy: OOOOWWWWW! That hurt!
Cloud: Uh, Kinie, do you want to go to Nibelheim? That's Tifa's and myself's hometown.
Kinie: Yeah, I wanna see where you guys hung out before I joined up with you guys.
Tifa: Well then, next stop, Nibelheim!
They climb into their airship, and fly away. As the party flies away in their airship, a new problem occurs. The bullet from Kinie's gun hits the Ferris wheel, causing it to become loose, detach from the motor, and roll around Gold Saucer, crushing half of the buildings before it stops. Nice one, Kinie!
End of Chapter 2
Chapter 2 - Gold Saucer's New Attraction
Tifa: Kinie, welcome to Gold Saucer!
Kinie: Look at all the lights! It looks like Las Vegas!
Everyone: Las? Vegas???
Kinie: Nevermind.
They dock the Highwind and proceed to the entrance.
Kinie: OK everyone, remember where we parked.
Everyone: ???
Kinie: Nevermind.
Ticketseller: Welcome to Gold Saucer. A ticket costs 3,000 GP. A gold ticket costs 30,000 GP, and you can use it again and again, like a lifetime pass, as long as you have it.
Cloud: Here's our gold tickets.
The seller lets them all by, but when Kinie tries to go through, she stops him.
Ticketseller: I'm sorry, sir, but you can't go through.
Kinie: Why not?
Ticketseller: you don't have a gold ticket.
Kinie: Well, can I see one? You'll have it back in a minute, I swear. I won't steal it.
Ticketseller: Well, OK. I don't see any harm in that.
Kinie grabs the gold ticket, takes out his drawing pad, and starts to draw. A minute later, he has an exact copy of the ticket on paper. All of a sudden, there's the gold ticket that he drew in the air. He grabs it, and gives back the original one.
Kinie: Here you go. Thanks!
Ticketseller (bugging out): Uh, Uh . That's it, I'm switching to de-CAF.
Kinie: So, Yuffie, what can you do at Gold Saucer?
Yuffie: Oh, you can do almost anything! They have a Ferris wheel, a roller coaster, a monster battle arena, a chocobo racing track and several simulation games that range from raising moogles to racing motorcycles.
Cait Sith: Hey, look! (Points up). They just opened a new attraction. Why don't we go there first before the line gets too big?
Cloud: That sounds like a good idea.
So they all head to the new attraction. It turns out to be a gigantic.
Kinie: Paintball arena? Oh, that's rich! Their new attraction is paintball? Ha!
Barret: What're you babbling about? This thing is brand new! No one's even heard of it before!
Kinie: Yeah, right. And I'm the Queen of England!
Everyone: Queen? England?
Kinie: Nevermind.
Cashier: Uh, hello? Can I help you people?
Cloud: Oh, yeah, can please have 10 paintball guns?
Cashier: I'm sorry, but we only have 2 left. If you can go and defeat the other guys in there, then you can play.
Cloud: How many are in there right now?
Cashier: 2, but they're not normal people. They've won every prize today. We've got a huge prize for the person that can defeat them.
Cloud: OK, we'll but those 2 guns.
Cashier: OK that'll be 500 GP.
Cloud: Here's 750 GP. Keep the change.
Cashier: Thanks! Now, each gun has 1,000 shots. If you get hit, you're out. Don't worry, they don't hurt. All they do is bruise the skin.
Cloud: OK, thanks. Cid: So, Cloud, who are you gonna' send in to kick some ass?
Cloud: Vincent, and . Kinie.
Kinie: Me?
Cid: What?! That punk? He f****** pisses me off! I don't like him!
Cloud: I would've sent in Barret, but he can only use his gattling gun to shoot stuff with. So, I'm sending him in because he's the only only with gun experience.
Kinie: But, I don't know a thing about guns.
They fall over, anime style.
Vincent: Well, since you carry a gun, it's only natural to assume you know how to use it. We might as well try our best.
So Vincent and Kinie go into the arena. The others watch from an observatory near the top of the arena. They decide to split up so that they can get this over with faster. Several hours pass before Kinie and Vincent meet again.
Vincent: Man, these guys are good. They really are giving me a run for the money. I've got 100 shots left, how about you Kinie?
Kinie: 1,000.
Vincent: What?! You haven't taken a single shot?
Kinie: I don't really like guns.
Vincent: You are so pathetic. Huh? What's that moving to your right, about 10 meters away? I'm going to find out.
Vincent gets up, and dashes over to try and shoot one of the guys left. A minute later, several dozen shots ring out. Kinie sees that Vincent and one of the other guys is out. So, after the two leave, he walks out into an open area. The other guy steps out from behind a wall.
Mysterious Man: So, Kinie. We meet again.
Kinie: Wait, I know that voice. Andy? Andy is that you? I thought you were dead?
Andy: Well, your aim was a little off. You never did like to kill people, did you? I don't have a problem with death, so now it's payback time! Die, Kinie, die!
Andy fires a shot straight at Kinie. He steps to the side, leaving only 2 hairs floating where he was a second ago. The rest of the party is surprised because they don't know how a buffoon could move that fast.
Kinie: (sweatdrop with bugged out eyes) SSSCCCAAARRRYYYY!!!
Andy: Well, you may have dodged one shot. But how about 5 shots?
Andy pulls back his coat, revealing 4 more paintball guns.
Kinie: Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!!!!!
Kinie runs around, acting like the buffoon that he is, while avoiding all of Andy's shots. He shoots 5 shots at Andy, with each shot going into the barrel of the gun, jamming the guns.
Andy: Ahaha,ahaha,ahahaha . huh? Why have the guns stopped firing?
Kinie quickly runs up to Andy, and before he shoots him in the arm, says.
Kinie: You lose.
A few seconds later.
Cashier: Winner, Kinie!
After Kinie leaves the arena, he goes over to the cashier to collect his reward.
Cashier: Here's your prize, Mr. Kinie.
Kinie: What, a gigantic red jewel?
Yuffie: T-That's a master summon materia! You can summon any summon monster now to kick some monster ass in battle.
Kinie: Oh, that's why there's a big red monster that's on fire standing behind the other guy.
Ifrit uses Hellfire on the guy, burning him to a crisp.
Andy: Oh my God, Kinie! You killed Alex!
Kinie: That was Alex? Man, he lost some weight.
Andy: Now I have to kill you because you killed Alex!!
Andy takes out his gun. Kinie pulls out his, and shoots his gun out of his hand. The bullet goes flying off toward the Ferris wheel.
Andy: OOOOWWWWW! That hurt!
Cloud: Uh, Kinie, do you want to go to Nibelheim? That's Tifa's and myself's hometown.
Kinie: Yeah, I wanna see where you guys hung out before I joined up with you guys.
Tifa: Well then, next stop, Nibelheim!
They climb into their airship, and fly away. As the party flies away in their airship, a new problem occurs. The bullet from Kinie's gun hits the Ferris wheel, causing it to become loose, detach from the motor, and roll around Gold Saucer, crushing half of the buildings before it stops. Nice one, Kinie!
End of Chapter 2