I wanted to say "thank you" to the people who are still reading
this, despite the Lana thing.
Part 6
Lana awoke to the sound of soft laughter rumbling through the chest
beneath her ear. Opening her eyes slowly to allow them time to
adjust to the unfamiliar darkness of the farmhouse, she could just
make out the outline of a cellular phone pressed to her human
pillow's ear.
"She's asleep," Bruce said to whomever was on the phone. "Safe,
yes. I'm taking good care of her." Another soft chuckle vibrated
through him. She sort of liked the way it felt against her body.
"I'm glad you called, though. I would have felt badly about it
otherwise." He fell silent and then, "Good night, Lex."
"That was Lex?" she asked, alerting him to the fact that she was,
in fact, awake.
Bruce nodded in affirmation. "He called to ask if things were okay
here--with you, I mean. I'm sorry we woke you up."
"Oh. You didn't. I just--just couldn't sleep." Bruce accepted
this rather lame excuse with a frown, but said nothing. "How did Lex
know about this?"
"We were supposed to have dinner in Metropolis."
The suitcase, Lana realized as guilt seeped back into her soul.
He'd missed his dinner with Lex because of her. They probably had
important business to discuss and now it had to wait. Again, because
of her.
"Lana." Bruce's voice was darker than usual, deeper and somehow
more intense. "You do know that none this is your fault, right?"
"But I knew a storm might be coming," she protested. "And you could
be in Metropolis right now if you hadn't stopped to look for me."
"Do you honestly think either Lex or I would be enjoying our fancy
dinner right now if a friend of ours was lost and possibly in danger?"
She looked up and saw the sincerity in his eyes. "No, I guess not."
He gave her a gentle smile, smoothing her hair with the palm of his
hands. "Of course not," he confirmed. "Lex and I both understand,
trust me. I only hope whatever sent you out alone on a day like
today has worked itself out."
"No, it hasn't," she admitted with a tortured sigh. "I honestly
didn't mean to cause everyone so much trouble," she told him. "I
just wanted to find someplace where I could be alone and think, you
know?" Of course he didn't, she thought. Bruce Wayne was a master
of his own destiny; he couldn't possibly know what it felt like to be
what other people wanted you to be.
"Yeah, I do, actually," he said, surprising her. He studied her
closely, and again Lana felt as if he was trying to see inside her.
"If you talked about it, it might help you sort things out."
The offer was so tempting. Lana couldn't count the times she'd
wanted to tell someone what she was feeling, but didn't out of fear
of shattering that image of herself. The image she was growing to
hate. But here in the unfinished farmhouse, she felt as if she could
do it. She could tell Bruce, and the darkness surrounding them would
swallow up her secret feelings as soon as she voiced them.
"Well," she began, hesitating on the first word. "Everyone I know
thinks that I'm perfect--that my life is so wonderful and idyllic.
But it's far from it." She continued to speak--telling him about
her parents, Nell, the pressures of running the Talon, dating
Whitney, and about her uncertainties. He listened long into the
night, until the rains had finally stopped and Lana had again fallen
asleep in his arms.
*&*&*&*
Lana stared at herself in the mirror.
She felt different, although nothing had happened to her to make
feel that way. Or had it? She'd told her secrets to someone other
than her diary, someone who had understood more than she thought he
would.
It was Bruce's advice that had changed her, she realized, even
though she had yet to act on any of it. Although, to be fair, he'd
only said things she should already have known. Maybe did know in
her heart. He'd told her that she didn't have to be anything but who
she was, not who other people wanted her to be. Of course, she'd
argued that she didn't know who she was.
::Of course you don't,:: she could still hear him saying. ::No one
knows everything about themselves seventeen, and those who think they
do are fooling themselves.:: She'd laughed at that, then admitted
she was a little--okay, a lot--scared to find out who she really was.
He'd simply grinned at her as if he understood how frightening it was
to reinvent yourself and told her that--the fear, she supposed--was
all a part of discovering your true self.
Just go for it, he'd told her, adding that from the way she spoke,
her heart already knew what it wanted. All she had to do was follow
it.
She wanted to, wanted to with every fiber of her being. She longed
for people to see *her* and not the little girl whose parents had
died in fire before her very eyes. Not the frightened child on the
magazine cover, but the person she'd grown into.
"Good-bye, fairy princess," Lana told her reflection, her voice full
of new resolve. Turning from the mirror she crossed to the closet
and began pulling out clothes and tossing them onto the floor.
"Lana, honey?" Nell's voice came from the doorway and Lana turned
to see her aunt watching her with concern. "What's wrong with you?
You're so moody lately." Nell eyed the mess appraisingly. "Is there
something the matter with your clothes?" she asked when Lana didn't
respond to her other questions.
Lana gave her a small smile, hoping to ease Nell's mind. Nell
hadn't said anything when Bruce brought her home yesterday. She just
hugged her close and thanked Bruce repeatedly. Like she was still
that child--small and breakable. Afterwards, when he'd climbed into
his sleek, black sports car and left them alone together in the
driveway, Lana pulled away from her aunt and spent the rest of the
day in her bedroom. Nell hadn't tried to talk to about what might be
bothering her until now.
"Oh, no, they're fine," Lana said before she could stop herself.
"Some of them just aren't me anymore, you know?" she added, giving
Nell a meaningful look. "I thinking about boxing them up and taking
them to Goodwill." It wasn't a lie. That had been what she'd
intended to do with them.
"New clothes always made me feeling better when I was down in the
dumps," Nell told her, sitting down on Lana's bed. Well, duh, Lana
thought. Nell still prescribed to the shop-til-you-drop method of
therapy. "Why don't I help you pack up what you don't want and then
we can go shopping. Fordman's is having a sale--"
"Actually, I kind of wanted something different than Fordman's usual
fare." Lana shifted her gaze away from her aunt and then back again.
"I have some money saved up... from the Talon... and I thought we
could go into Metropolis and--"
"That sounds like a good idea!" Nell gushed, taking her hand and
squeezing it. "We could go Saturday, leave early, have lunch at a
fancy restaurant, maybe?"
"Sure," agreed Lana, weakly. Nell really didn't want to know what
was bothering her, she just wanted to be sure that the illusion of
"all right" was still intact.
this, despite the Lana thing.
Part 6
Lana awoke to the sound of soft laughter rumbling through the chest
beneath her ear. Opening her eyes slowly to allow them time to
adjust to the unfamiliar darkness of the farmhouse, she could just
make out the outline of a cellular phone pressed to her human
pillow's ear.
"She's asleep," Bruce said to whomever was on the phone. "Safe,
yes. I'm taking good care of her." Another soft chuckle vibrated
through him. She sort of liked the way it felt against her body.
"I'm glad you called, though. I would have felt badly about it
otherwise." He fell silent and then, "Good night, Lex."
"That was Lex?" she asked, alerting him to the fact that she was,
in fact, awake.
Bruce nodded in affirmation. "He called to ask if things were okay
here--with you, I mean. I'm sorry we woke you up."
"Oh. You didn't. I just--just couldn't sleep." Bruce accepted
this rather lame excuse with a frown, but said nothing. "How did Lex
know about this?"
"We were supposed to have dinner in Metropolis."
The suitcase, Lana realized as guilt seeped back into her soul.
He'd missed his dinner with Lex because of her. They probably had
important business to discuss and now it had to wait. Again, because
of her.
"Lana." Bruce's voice was darker than usual, deeper and somehow
more intense. "You do know that none this is your fault, right?"
"But I knew a storm might be coming," she protested. "And you could
be in Metropolis right now if you hadn't stopped to look for me."
"Do you honestly think either Lex or I would be enjoying our fancy
dinner right now if a friend of ours was lost and possibly in danger?"
She looked up and saw the sincerity in his eyes. "No, I guess not."
He gave her a gentle smile, smoothing her hair with the palm of his
hands. "Of course not," he confirmed. "Lex and I both understand,
trust me. I only hope whatever sent you out alone on a day like
today has worked itself out."
"No, it hasn't," she admitted with a tortured sigh. "I honestly
didn't mean to cause everyone so much trouble," she told him. "I
just wanted to find someplace where I could be alone and think, you
know?" Of course he didn't, she thought. Bruce Wayne was a master
of his own destiny; he couldn't possibly know what it felt like to be
what other people wanted you to be.
"Yeah, I do, actually," he said, surprising her. He studied her
closely, and again Lana felt as if he was trying to see inside her.
"If you talked about it, it might help you sort things out."
The offer was so tempting. Lana couldn't count the times she'd
wanted to tell someone what she was feeling, but didn't out of fear
of shattering that image of herself. The image she was growing to
hate. But here in the unfinished farmhouse, she felt as if she could
do it. She could tell Bruce, and the darkness surrounding them would
swallow up her secret feelings as soon as she voiced them.
"Well," she began, hesitating on the first word. "Everyone I know
thinks that I'm perfect--that my life is so wonderful and idyllic.
But it's far from it." She continued to speak--telling him about
her parents, Nell, the pressures of running the Talon, dating
Whitney, and about her uncertainties. He listened long into the
night, until the rains had finally stopped and Lana had again fallen
asleep in his arms.
*&*&*&*
Lana stared at herself in the mirror.
She felt different, although nothing had happened to her to make
feel that way. Or had it? She'd told her secrets to someone other
than her diary, someone who had understood more than she thought he
would.
It was Bruce's advice that had changed her, she realized, even
though she had yet to act on any of it. Although, to be fair, he'd
only said things she should already have known. Maybe did know in
her heart. He'd told her that she didn't have to be anything but who
she was, not who other people wanted her to be. Of course, she'd
argued that she didn't know who she was.
::Of course you don't,:: she could still hear him saying. ::No one
knows everything about themselves seventeen, and those who think they
do are fooling themselves.:: She'd laughed at that, then admitted
she was a little--okay, a lot--scared to find out who she really was.
He'd simply grinned at her as if he understood how frightening it was
to reinvent yourself and told her that--the fear, she supposed--was
all a part of discovering your true self.
Just go for it, he'd told her, adding that from the way she spoke,
her heart already knew what it wanted. All she had to do was follow
it.
She wanted to, wanted to with every fiber of her being. She longed
for people to see *her* and not the little girl whose parents had
died in fire before her very eyes. Not the frightened child on the
magazine cover, but the person she'd grown into.
"Good-bye, fairy princess," Lana told her reflection, her voice full
of new resolve. Turning from the mirror she crossed to the closet
and began pulling out clothes and tossing them onto the floor.
"Lana, honey?" Nell's voice came from the doorway and Lana turned
to see her aunt watching her with concern. "What's wrong with you?
You're so moody lately." Nell eyed the mess appraisingly. "Is there
something the matter with your clothes?" she asked when Lana didn't
respond to her other questions.
Lana gave her a small smile, hoping to ease Nell's mind. Nell
hadn't said anything when Bruce brought her home yesterday. She just
hugged her close and thanked Bruce repeatedly. Like she was still
that child--small and breakable. Afterwards, when he'd climbed into
his sleek, black sports car and left them alone together in the
driveway, Lana pulled away from her aunt and spent the rest of the
day in her bedroom. Nell hadn't tried to talk to about what might be
bothering her until now.
"Oh, no, they're fine," Lana said before she could stop herself.
"Some of them just aren't me anymore, you know?" she added, giving
Nell a meaningful look. "I thinking about boxing them up and taking
them to Goodwill." It wasn't a lie. That had been what she'd
intended to do with them.
"New clothes always made me feeling better when I was down in the
dumps," Nell told her, sitting down on Lana's bed. Well, duh, Lana
thought. Nell still prescribed to the shop-til-you-drop method of
therapy. "Why don't I help you pack up what you don't want and then
we can go shopping. Fordman's is having a sale--"
"Actually, I kind of wanted something different than Fordman's usual
fare." Lana shifted her gaze away from her aunt and then back again.
"I have some money saved up... from the Talon... and I thought we
could go into Metropolis and--"
"That sounds like a good idea!" Nell gushed, taking her hand and
squeezing it. "We could go Saturday, leave early, have lunch at a
fancy restaurant, maybe?"
"Sure," agreed Lana, weakly. Nell really didn't want to know what
was bothering her, she just wanted to be sure that the illusion of
"all right" was still intact.