Dangerous minds
Chapter One
Who am I? Well as far as I know I am Benjamin Preston. Son of local mayor Phillip Preston and son of local mayor's secretary, Justine Preston. I am an only single child.
Some say that is my problem, I am spoilt, and I am mentally unstable. No! My real problem isn't either, I am not spoilt, I haven't gotten my own way for awhile now, and as for mentally unstable, does been smart equal to mentally unstable?
I do my daily chores, which include walking my dog, cleaning my room (as best as I can), and doing the washing up. I complete my homework, I study, I make friends easily, I play sport, and I work part time at a hardware store.
For the most part I live my life normally, well as normal as a teenager of seventeen can.
I am fairly well known around school. Maybe it's because of my parents status, maybe it's because I'm fairly wealthy or maybe it's because they actually like me for me. But scratch that how could someone personally like me for me, when I myself don't like me for me, if that makes any sense.
I am a swimmer in the summer and I play soccer in the winter. My status of sports gods is renowned. Maybe this is why I'm fairly popular, around the guys and around the ladies.
Yes, the ladies. I don't know about them. I like females yes, but I'm not attracted to them.
I have a girlfriend, a head cheerleader. Blond, blue eyed in every case drop-dead gorgeous. My mates are jealous of me. I don't know why, It's not as so my girlfriend and I are often together, as most couples at school are. She does her cheerleading, I do my sport. We go out on weekends, we kiss, and we touch but nothing extreme. My girlfriend and I get along great, almost like best friends.
Best friends not a couple.
My mates all tease me about my relationship with my girlfriend 'Go nail her.' They often say. But how can I do that to a girl? I respect women. I wouldn't purposely 'Nail them' to boast to my mates. I see that as disrespectful and girls shouldn't be disrespected.
Boys on the other hand.
My mates all seem to see women as a goal. The most screws in a year equals the amount of respect you receive. Stupid really. Syphilis here we come...
Nobody knows I'm still a virgin. Yes I have done things with females but I have never gone that far.. I could if I had wanted to. But that isn't what I want. What I want is to wait. Wait for the right person.
But the right person doesn't want me.
Yes the person I want is the most oblivious to the truth. I realized the other day just how much this person means to me. That was why I rung up my girlfriend and told her we should split up. Girlfriend yes I'll always call her that. A girl that is a friend that is what she is. A girl who I didn't want to hurt when the truth was finally revealed.
The truth of my sexuality. A homosexual is the technical name; a gay is what the guys refer to them as.
I realised these feelings a while ago. I was walking down a street and my mates were with me. A bunch of 'hot chicks' walked by and they all whistled at them. I didn't I stood and starred and didn't feel anything. I looked at my best friend as he whistled to the girls and I smiled and whistled. But not at the girls. No, I whistled at him.
None of my friends really understood that day that I whistled at one of my best mates. I mocked them and denied it all. Gullible as they are, they believed me.
I had a crush on my best mate, I still do. I think I realised then, that he was the right one for me. The one I should wait for.
I knew then that I was gay, but I was ignorant to the truth. That was why I dated girls. For a year I have dated with girls and for a year I have denied my sexuality.
But not any more..
I, Benjamin Preston am gay. I have been for a year.
I haven't admitted it out loud until now. I will never understand why I fantasise about guys as I ignore girls. I will never understand why I will wait forever until that right person notices me.
I will wait, but till that day I will be inconspicuous. I will act normal. I will continue to flirt with girls. I will continue to deny my true feelings and I will continue to act normal.
Well as normal as a boy of seventeen can act. A boy of seventeen who has realized that he is gay, a boy of seventeen who will continue to wait for the one. The one who will hold him and whisper sweet nothings in his ear and pledge his love for him.
But until then I will continue to wait.
For him, I will wait forever if it means I will eventually get him in the end.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Chapter One
Who am I? Well as far as I know I am Benjamin Preston. Son of local mayor Phillip Preston and son of local mayor's secretary, Justine Preston. I am an only single child.
Some say that is my problem, I am spoilt, and I am mentally unstable. No! My real problem isn't either, I am not spoilt, I haven't gotten my own way for awhile now, and as for mentally unstable, does been smart equal to mentally unstable?
I do my daily chores, which include walking my dog, cleaning my room (as best as I can), and doing the washing up. I complete my homework, I study, I make friends easily, I play sport, and I work part time at a hardware store.
For the most part I live my life normally, well as normal as a teenager of seventeen can.
I am fairly well known around school. Maybe it's because of my parents status, maybe it's because I'm fairly wealthy or maybe it's because they actually like me for me. But scratch that how could someone personally like me for me, when I myself don't like me for me, if that makes any sense.
I am a swimmer in the summer and I play soccer in the winter. My status of sports gods is renowned. Maybe this is why I'm fairly popular, around the guys and around the ladies.
Yes, the ladies. I don't know about them. I like females yes, but I'm not attracted to them.
I have a girlfriend, a head cheerleader. Blond, blue eyed in every case drop-dead gorgeous. My mates are jealous of me. I don't know why, It's not as so my girlfriend and I are often together, as most couples at school are. She does her cheerleading, I do my sport. We go out on weekends, we kiss, and we touch but nothing extreme. My girlfriend and I get along great, almost like best friends.
Best friends not a couple.
My mates all tease me about my relationship with my girlfriend 'Go nail her.' They often say. But how can I do that to a girl? I respect women. I wouldn't purposely 'Nail them' to boast to my mates. I see that as disrespectful and girls shouldn't be disrespected.
Boys on the other hand.
My mates all seem to see women as a goal. The most screws in a year equals the amount of respect you receive. Stupid really. Syphilis here we come...
Nobody knows I'm still a virgin. Yes I have done things with females but I have never gone that far.. I could if I had wanted to. But that isn't what I want. What I want is to wait. Wait for the right person.
But the right person doesn't want me.
Yes the person I want is the most oblivious to the truth. I realized the other day just how much this person means to me. That was why I rung up my girlfriend and told her we should split up. Girlfriend yes I'll always call her that. A girl that is a friend that is what she is. A girl who I didn't want to hurt when the truth was finally revealed.
The truth of my sexuality. A homosexual is the technical name; a gay is what the guys refer to them as.
I realised these feelings a while ago. I was walking down a street and my mates were with me. A bunch of 'hot chicks' walked by and they all whistled at them. I didn't I stood and starred and didn't feel anything. I looked at my best friend as he whistled to the girls and I smiled and whistled. But not at the girls. No, I whistled at him.
None of my friends really understood that day that I whistled at one of my best mates. I mocked them and denied it all. Gullible as they are, they believed me.
I had a crush on my best mate, I still do. I think I realised then, that he was the right one for me. The one I should wait for.
I knew then that I was gay, but I was ignorant to the truth. That was why I dated girls. For a year I have dated with girls and for a year I have denied my sexuality.
But not any more..
I, Benjamin Preston am gay. I have been for a year.
I haven't admitted it out loud until now. I will never understand why I fantasise about guys as I ignore girls. I will never understand why I will wait forever until that right person notices me.
I will wait, but till that day I will be inconspicuous. I will act normal. I will continue to flirt with girls. I will continue to deny my true feelings and I will continue to act normal.
Well as normal as a boy of seventeen can act. A boy of seventeen who has realized that he is gay, a boy of seventeen who will continue to wait for the one. The one who will hold him and whisper sweet nothings in his ear and pledge his love for him.
But until then I will continue to wait.
For him, I will wait forever if it means I will eventually get him in the end.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*