Disclaimer: Disclaimer: Dangermouse and characters are property of Cosgrove/Hall productions, and I don't own them. This fiction and the characters of M6 Lori L'Amour and her assistant and other craziness the other side of the pond is my own insanity, property of me, Trynia Merin. Like the story that Sabertooth Kitty wrote with celebrities, I'm sure this has some similarities, but instead of dealing with pop stars I'm delving off the deep end into classic seventies rock, and you might notice the similarities between the two bands that I am giving animal type names to, and I'm leaving it up to guess which two I'm poking fun at here J . It's all in fun, and in good humor. Hope it's not TOO much like the story Pop Culture Shock, but it will have a LOT of differences… J

"Just Push Pause, Or the Rock All Night Stops…"

By Trynia Merin

Part 2

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After stopping to drop Bagel off at the local synagogue, Lori quickly drove to Castle Donnington in the Gail 6. She felt really nervous about meeting her lifelong heroes, and wondered if Stevie Byler the hawk lead singer of Byrdsmythe would give her an autograph or not. Equipped with the Velvet Rope/Platinum pass she quickly stashed the car in the local lot, and pushed the A for armoring the car. Nobody would dare touch it now. As she approached the huge castle she gasped at the fans gathered already. Animals with Smythe Air Force T shirts were wandering around with the black T shirted Smooch Squad fans. There seemed to be a good number of middle aged dogs, cats, pigs, birds, ducks, mice, hamsters and guinea pigs all making the trip from their vehicles to the huge concert stage set up in the field. From the pickup trucks with their pavilions set out to the people drinking pints of ale and such, she realized it had been AGES since she had been to a concert like this one.

As she approached the venue entrance she saw the necessary security checkpoints where animals were forced to surrender their camcorders or incriminating equipment. With her all access pass she was quickly waved through, and she had stopped in the car to put on her Smooches World Fraternization Tour shirt from 1979 along with a bluejean vest covered with rhinestones and patches so she could fit in. Other lucky fans had their fedoras looking like Stevie Byler and the other member of Byrdsmythe who were lined up. The logo of the band was a pair of wings with the letter B in a big circle, while the Smooch logo was in all capital letters with a lien around the outer side.

Already people in line had replica costumes of the characters in the band: the Dragon, the Street Katt, the Alien, and the Superstar complete with the distinct facial makeup and platform boots that comprised the band's unique look. Cheap wigs and other accoutrements liked choker collars completed the outfits. Most of the Smooch fans wore black tour T-shirts and bluejeans with sneakers, while others had on bluejean vests with the logo Smooch Squad on the back, the official fanclub of the band.

"This way miss, you're going to meet them before the concert…" the guard said as she showed her all access pass. People were screaming as the first band Spit took the stage with their lead song, Returning to the System from their new album. Dressed in black the lead singer, an attractive Labrador retriever with long black locks screamed and strutted his stuff onstage. Already Smooch and Smythe fans were filing in, some with homemade banners and others with their umbrellas and coolers to stake out a claim on the lawn seats.

"Right this way," said the security guard, which wore black T-shirts with the band logos on them. She was hastened with nine other lucky fans with the Platinum passes, feeling like Charlie and the five lucky people with the golden tickets from Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory.

"I'm a diehard," she whispered to the guard, who nodded.

"Follow me," he whispered and took her to one corner. Stevie Byler and the other four members of Byrdsmythe filed out, and the fans went nuts as they shook hands and signed autographs. Worth 500 pounds, her pass would have been the envy of many of the Gold, Bronze and Silver holders out in the fields.

When Stevie signed autographs, everyone noticed his huge beak, which was one of his well-known features. Lori waited patiently as he signed a tourbook for her and pretended to give her a nibble on one ear as he passed by. However the ten platinum holders went berserk when the next band, Lori's favorite filed out. They towered over everyone else, all black and silver with their various band costumes, a relic from the seventies that just wouldn't die. First was Petey Catt, the drummer who was waving and grinning like a Cheshire, blowing kisses as he waved and everyone gave the I love you sign to him that rockers did. Next was the attractive sheep Tommy Brayer, who smiled the best he could with the gold starburst motif in his makeup. He gave a goofy grin and stumbled on moon boots before the last two members followed. People jumped back as the Dragon spread black wings and showed his definite lizard-like tongue that would make Cam Elion jealous. He scared some of the younger kids, and had his eyes fixed on all the females in their T-shirts and tight fitting dresses. As he came past Lori he grinned, and gave her a thumb up.

"Got plans for the night babycakes?"

"Um, just here for the show," she said, knowing he had some animal charisma like Stevie Byler did. She had read his autobiography Masks and Makeup, and knew in reality he was an intelligent lizard. His long tail, covered in scales which were part of the costume waved menacingly back and forth as it seemed to have a mind of its own. But the last member strode out in a silver and black tuxedo jacket studded with five pointed stars and planets, a whole galaxy as the Super Star moved into view. His eyes were a piercing soulful dark brown, and the makeup distinct. What seemed a half mask of several points over the right eye seemed to peer as he smiled and strutted his stuff. The ladies naturally went nuts as he threw roses to them. He stopped by Lori and gave a slow smile, and his voice said,

"Hello beautiful…"

"Hello," she panted, her heart racing as he took her hand and gave it a soft kiss from red painted lips. Long hair was black and glossy curly, probably a wig, but he was gorgeous, as she had pinned some of his posters on her walls.

"Whom do I make this out to?" he said in a New York accented voice as she handed him her tourbook.

"To Lori," she whispered, and he motioned her to turn around so he could lean on her back to sign it with his flourish.

"You came al the way from America to see little old us," he chuckled in a rich baritone voice that seemed it could melt butter. "How sweet of you, baby…"

"Feelings mutual," she smiled. "I'm from New York, just like you… and I used to have a band…"

"Mr. Stann, we're taking photos," said the manager as he waved them over. Each platinum member had their picture taken with the band in various poses. When it was Lori's turn, she felt herself maneuvered by the figures in black and silver that towered over her. She felt a paw on her hand from the Alley Katt, and the Alien stood in a whimsical pose with his normal spaced out look. She felt an arm go around her waist as the Super Star held her on one side, and the Dragon wrapped his tail around her waist and put his other hand on her hip just above Stan's. His arms were stretched out to reveal the huge black cape under the armored sleeves of his costume, and Lori couldn't resist putting her arm around both their waists as the picture was snapped.

"NEXT!" called out the photographer, who handed Lori a number, and a special T shirt."

"Thanks for coming out," Super Star whipped, and she felt that Gila's tail was still around her waist.

"You got any plans tonight, sweet stuff?" he said in a low growl.

"Mmm, perhaps you need my help protecting you guys," she laughed back as her tail slipped around his and slowly lowered it off her waist.

"Stop messing around Gila," laughed Tommie. "She's only got her eyes on the stars…"

"Ohhh if I could take you back to my LAIR and show you my treasure trove," Gila purred, his armored hands clothed in spikes rubbing over Lori's shoulders.

"Hmm, I'll have to reconsider…" she looked at him, knowing it was part of his character, and he was in reality a shy comic book nerd turned rock super star. "Besides, don't' you have some OTHER fans to see to?"

"Go make an exposition elsewhere, Gila," Stan laughed warmly as he shoed him away and smiled at Lori. "He bothering you?"

"I'm somewhere between flattered and disgusted," she joked.

"He's like that to all the female species," smiled Stan. "But I'm more suave… are you REALLY here to protect little ol us?"

"Let's just say you'll find out during the concert," she smiled at him. "And I have to ask, can I give you a hug?"

"Sure thing," he smiled and enveloped her in muscular arms. His top was exposing the chest covered in silky black fur, and she smoothed her hand over it, feeling the silkiest fur she could imagine. He gave her a squeeze and then smiled as she looked up at him.

"Thanks," she smiled.

"This way people!" shouted the guards and the platinum holders were ushered off. Saul Stann scratched his hair, something he often did when he was confused, and turned to his band-mates.

"Something about that chick," Petey Katt mumbled. "You been staring at her the whole time."

"He's just scooping out the merchandise," Gila laughed in a deep bass voice.

"Get your mind out of the gutter, Scalesimm," Saul mumbled as he rolled his eyes. "She's just different… that's all. Said she was going to protect us… go figure…"

"That's pretty heavy," said Tommy Brayley. "Who'd figure."

"Hmm, indeed," Gila said with a stern concerned look on his black and white painted face. "Hope she's not some undercover cop… I mean our manager said some nut job was going to try and cut off our power…"

"Hah, that'll be the day," Tommy Brayley laughed. "The last person who tried THAT stunt you said got locked in a closet!"

"Still, it creeps me out," said Petey Katt as Gila waved them all backstage to wait for their time to come on.

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Lori rushed to her front row seats, which were right in front of the microphone. Smooch fans pressed against her, and she gasped as she heard the WHAT's classic song, Fools No More playing as the anticipation built to a climax. People were screaming and shouting and the shout grew to a roar as a black silk curtain with the band logo SMOOCH in silver dropped down. A loud announcer shouted, "YOU WANTED THE BEST… AND HERE THEY ARE, the AWESOMEIST BAND IN THE WORLD…."

A huge bang started out, and the curtain dropped. From a riser high over the stage, four figures descended with two pyro fountains shooting sparks. The band logo, six feet tall in lights flashed stroboscopically. Done in industrial silver with ranks of huge amplifiers on either side, the stage was imposing as the opening chords rambled through the audience, banging with multiple pops of fireworks. When the platform descended, the three guitarists paraded onstage, on their platform shoes while the drummer leapt behind his huge kit. Standing knee to knee, Gila, Saul and Tommie started their first song, "Auto Rock City" with a huge twanging of guitars. To stage right Gila pranced and stalked, waggling his tongue and swishing his tail as Saul danced up front and did spectacular leaps, shaking his tail to the delight of the crowd. Tommie leaned back and wailed on lead guitar during the solo.

Their next song "You love me, dontcha," had clips of the band's history on two huge video screens. Lori screamed and pumped her fist as Saul strutted across the stage, throwing his tuxedo jacket down to reveal himself in his spandex pants and a pair of suspenders. Females went wild as he put guitar picks on his tongue and spit them out into the crowd. He moved up to Lori who leaned up and picked up the pick right from his mouth. Girls screamed and stood on their male's shoulders, only to be told to get down by annoyed fans that couldn't see.

Later on in the show, Saul invited the crowd to scream loud enough to make the needle of a gauge onscreen go into the red zone. He then got on a trapeze and sailed out over the crowd to a small stage in the rear where he danced and strutted to his signature song, "Explosion Love" wailing with his operatic rock star voice. Girls clawed and screamed to be seen as he danced there on his small stage. Finally he came back to the main stage, and Petey Catt did his famous drum solo.

Then lights dropped low, and Gila stood onstage, a green spot on him. He rolled his eyes to the whites, looking menacing as he slowly played a growling tone on his bass. Glancing back and forth he heard the crowd chanting "GILA, GILA, GILA!"

At last he tossed his head back, and sticky green slime oozed from his mouth and nose. It freaked everyone out, but he was covered in green slime, and waited, arms folded as everyone screamed his name. "OH yeah?" he growled.

"YEAHH!" the crowed shrieked.

"ALL RIGHT!" he growled as he suddenly rose 20 feet in the air, his cloak extended to a platform above the stage. Petey Catt counted off four counts, and the loud rumbling bass solo was joined by touch crunching guitar chords as he sung his signature song, "Thor, Thundergod…"

The next highlight was when the last song, a rock ballad whirled on with a blaze of fire, and Petey Catt sang his song, "Black Pearls". Everyone gasped as his drum kit seemed to levitate and a large cat banner was attached. Every pyro shot off and the whole stage was ablaze with various fireworks in showers of gold. After that it seemed nothing could top that, except Petey came out wearing a towel and sang a touching love song called "Becky" to the crowd, who held up lighters to illuminate the audience like a Christmas tree.

Then the lights went down and the sign flashed. Animals screamed for the band to return, and they did, as Saul said, "We wouldn't be here if not for the fans, so lets "Rock all NIGHT!"

The most familiar song hammered through and they all began to sing as the crowd sang along. Confetti shot from several high-pressured sources, showering the crowd as they screamed and whistled. The whole arena was a party, till at last the set ended, and it was time for the next intermission. Byrdsmyth was there to take the stage, and Lori rushed back to see why Greenback had not suddenly cut the power.

Little did she know that something far more sinister was afoot as she rushed backstage…

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