Alex
Tuesday January 14th
"You want a subpoena based on what?" I asked.
"The baby wasn't Josh's. I think that he may have been killed by the person that she was cheating to him with." Olivia explained.
"Do you have any proof?"
"His medical records state that because of the measles when he was six, he's completely infertile. She claims that it's his baby."
"You have no case."
"Come on Alex, there must be something you can do."
"There might be one judge."
"You owe me," I said, handing the subpoena to Olivia. "It took twenty minutes to convince the judge to sign it."
"Okay, we have half an hour to get to her appointment," she said to Elliot. "Thanks Alex."
"Get the matters of conception over to the lab as soon as it's done," Cragen told them. "And make sure Jamie has a ride home. We still want her to cooperate as much possible. Then get over to the school and talk to some of her teachers. See if they've seen her with anyone else."
"And if they have?"
"Talk to him at school, if he looks good or admits that he was involved with her, bring him in."
"Don't you think this seems a bit much?" I asked. "They're kids."
"Would it be the first time a 'kid' committed a crime?" Cragen responded.
"Trust me, I have four of them. They're not kids for long anymore."
"Report back to me later," Cragen told them as they were putting their jackets on.
Elliot
"You're quiet," Olivia observed as we pulled into the parking lot. "Everything okay?"
"Just the case."
"Thinking about Maureen?"
"And Kathleen. And Elizabeth. Any of them could be Jamie. And her parents are completely clueless. Is that going to be me?"
"Jamie's parents don't know because they don't seem to care. You do."
I nodded. "Is that Jamie?"
Olivia looked out. "Yeah, that's her." We waited a minute, then opened the door and got out. We waited outside for another minute, until we saw her go in with a nurse.
"This is a subpoena for the matters of conception for Jamie Garner," she told the receptionist.
"I'll bring it to you as soon as it's done."
"Thanks." Less than half an hour later, we were back in the car, on our way to the lab.
"It makes me sick how fast that can be done," I said.
"What can be done?"
"An abortion. They can just take a life away in a heartbeat."
"Do you really believe that it's a life?"
"We all started that way."
"I don't want to get into this Elliot. There's nothing we can do to change it. It's not illegal, so it's not our problem."
"I guess," I muttered as she was getting out of the car to drop off the DNA. She was back within five minutes.
"Where to next?" she asked.
"Back to school."
"The minister of the crown tried to make you think that there is no psychological side effects of rape. They are, unfortunately, sadly mistaken. Although murder-" were the first words we heard when we went to find one of Josh's teachers.
"Anthony Shepard?" I asked, coming into the classroom. He looked up. He looked no more than twelve.
"James, take over as speaker, I'll be back in a minute." He came out into the hall and closed the door softly behind him.
"Detective Benson, Stabler. Special victims unit," Olivia introduced.
"Special victims unit. Is this about Jamie?"
Olivia and I exchanged glances. "No, it's about Josh Davis."
He looked confused. "Right," he said, something clicking.
"How well did you know him?" Olivia asked.
"Not too well. He was only in one of my classes."
"And you know his girlfriend?"
"Yeah. She's on my debating team, and I teach her three classes."
"Did you know of any problems he may have been having lately?"
"Not really. He's been a bit distracted lately. Nothing really noticeable."
"And Jamie?" I asked.
"She's been acting strange. For a month, she'd seem like she was working really hard, and then when she handed her work in, there'd be nothing on her sheet. And she lost her edge in debate for a couple of weeks. She seemed to be back lately."
"Has she ever mentioned any problems with him?"
"This isn't love shack. I'm not the best person to ask."
"Thanks for your time."
Olivia
Wednesday, January 15th
"I don't like that look on your face," I said to Elliot as I came in.
"DNA's in."
"And?"
"Not his. No one in the system."
I sat down. "So we got talk to her."
"You think that's going to work?"
"What other options do we have?"
"Can I get you something to drink?" I asked her. She still looked pale.
"I'm fine."
"How are you feeling?"
"I'm sorry if I sound rude, but why are you being so nice to me? I know I'm not here for small talk."
Something was still stopping me from going at her like we would with any other suspect. I still couldn't believe that she was involved, but nothing else made sense.
"Why did you lie to us?" I asked.
"About what?"
"About whose baby it was."
"It's. . . it was Josh's."
Elliot took the DNA test out of an envelop he had and pushed it towards her.
"What's this?"
"It's a DNA test confirming that Josh Davis was not the father of the fetus."
"So who was it Jamie?" he continued. "Your other boyfriend got mad at him, so he decided to kill Josh? Or did you ask him to? A dead boyfriend could really play in your favour. You get to be the victim."
"No," she said softly, her eyes welling up.
"Then what is it? Did you kill him yourself?"
"No."
"And what about Andrew Laurence? You blocked his number when the two of you got into a fight, and he decided to get back at you by killing your other boyfriend."
"No."
"Then how did it happen?" I knew that he was only coming on so strong, hoping she would crack. He didn't think she did it either. I had no idea why he was throwing around Andrew Laurence's name around. In a case like this, where the victim could have so easily been his son in a few years, he lost all patience.
"It's not what you think," she said. "I didn't kill Josh. I loved him. I really loved him."
"So what did happen? Were you cheating on him?"
She shook her head. "Two months ago, I went for a debate in Syracuse. The day before I left, Josh and I got into a fight. It was something stupid. I don't even remember what. We weren't leaving until the day after the tournament ended, so Saturday night, we were staying at the dorms and there was a party. I started talking to Andrew."
"Andrew Laurence?" I asked.
"Yeah. He was a second-year law student. He had also been one of my judges. We got into talking about the Columbia debate, and this case that I had been looking for everywhere. I had had a couple of drinks, and I didn't think too much of it when he asked if I had a computer in the room I was staying in. He was going to show me a website where I could access most case files."
"What happened when you got to the room?" I asked, afraid of where this was going.
"He closed the door, saying that it was too noisy in the hall. Then, before I had a chance to turn on the computer, he kissed me. I told him to stop. That I had a boyfriend. But he didn't. He threw me down on the bed and pulled down his pants. I said no. He ignored me, and he. . . he took off my jeans. Then he. . ." she trailed off and remained quiet for a minute, tears streaming down her face. I felt a knot growing in my stomach.
"When he was finished, he took off really fast. He just pulled up his pants and left. In the middle of it, Lauren, one of the girls I debate with, knocked on the door. I guess she heard me saying no or something, because she called Mr. Shepard was there ten minutes later."
"What did he say?" I asked.
"He asked if I was okay. I don't remember saying anything. I don't think I did."
"You didn't press charges?"
"I didn't want to."
"Did you see a doctor?"
"Not until Monday. One of the doctors said that I had untreated Chlamydia. I knew I didn't get it from Josh."
"And he started calling you?" Elliot asked.
She nodded. "A month ago. At first I could just hear breathing. Then he started talking. I had him blocked a week after he started calling."
"Have you seen or heard from him again?"
"No."
I just nodded.
Jamie
Saturday, November 9th
"Thank you Mr. Speaker. The government has just done a great job of telling you why we should pass this bill, and that's fine, but they have failed to mention what exactly is wrong with the status quo. Why would we go around changing laws if, as of late, there's nothing wrong with it. . ."
"You were great today," a male voice said from behind me. I turned around to find one of my judges, Andrew Laurence from earlier standing behind me.
"Thanks."
"How long have you been debating?"
"Since grade ten, so, uh, almost two years."
"You're really good. Have you thought about states?"
"A bit. It's far away. I have to get through regionals first."
"You'll do fine. Have you heard the resolution for Columbia yet?"
"Yeah. It's hard. Euthanasia."
"Have you read the Williams case file?"
"No. I've been trying to get a copy. It's supposed to make the affirmative's case."
"I've found this great website where you can get most case files."
"Really?"
"Yeah. Do you have a computer in your dorm?"
"Yeah."
"Do you want me to show you?"
I hesitated for a minute. I may have had two beers, but I wasn't sure about going alone with him. "Sure." I led him towards my room and unlocked it, slipping the key back in my pocket. I left the door open, but he closed it. I went to sit down at the computer, but he got to me first. He brought his mouth to mine and kissed me possessively.
"Stop," I told him, pushing him away, reaching for the doorknob. "Look, I have a boyfriend." He grabbed my wrists and threw me down onto the bed.
"Stop," I said again, my voice coming out more as a beg. "Don't."
He pulled his pants down, then ran his hand up my leg until he reached the waistline of my jeans and unsnapped them.
"No," I said softly. "Please, Andrew, stop."
"It's all good, baby," he grunted.
"Jamie?" a male voice asked. I recognized it right away. I didn't move to open the door. Two hours had passed. I didn't cry. I had just stayed there for twenty minutes, then managed to get up and spent an hour in the shower, the water as hot as I could get it, trying to burn the feeling of him off of me. Then I went into my Lauren's room (She wasn't there), feeling no better, checked every possible nook and cranny in the room, and sat down on her bed and just stared into space. Mr. Shepard hadn't bothered me until now.
I saw the handle on the door turning. I should have rethought going into Lauren's room. He'd still be able to get in. I turned away as he pushed open the door. He just stood there for a minute, before pulling a chair from the desk over and sitting close- careful not to sit too close- to me.
"What do you want?" I finally asked.
"Who did this to you?" He voice, although familiar, seemed distant, strange. I felt a drop of water from my hair slowly slide down my back, icy cold. I ignored it.
"I'm going to take you to the police, okay?" I still didn't look at him. I stared at a spot on the wall beside me where the paint had dripped when it had been painted. The trail got smaller and smaller, but never disappeared. Was that how my life would be? He would always be there.
"At least let me take you to get checked out." I still didn't say anything. He still sat there, not saying a word, not making a sound. I could barely hear him breathe.
"You can't just let this happen."
I stopped breathing for a minute when he said that. "Let it happen?" I asked, my voice monotone. "I didn't let this happen."
"That's not what I meant, Jamie."
"You know what, Mr. Shepard? I can understand you coming here. But just shove it." I wasn't monotone anymore. I was angry. At no one, but everyone at the same time. All I needed was someone to blame. He seemed like an easy target. "You haven't bothered to help me out, or take any interest in me. Until I started winning debates, you didn't know my name. You don't care. That bothered me for a long time, but honestly, I couldn't care less now. But you ignore me for all this time and now expect me to listen to you? You're whacked."
Wednesday, November 13th
"Are you mad at me?" Josh asked me. I turned around, closing my locker.
"No," I said simply, pulling my bag over my shoulder.
"Then what's wrong?"
"Nothing's wrong."
"Then why are you shutting me out?"
"I'm not shutting you out! God!"
"Jamie, I know you. I know you better than anyone. And I know you get this way when something really big is going on."
I turned around slowly to look at him. "Josh," I whispered. "What's going on right now, you don't want to know."
He looked stung by that comment. "Why's that?"
"It's too much, and too hard. I don't want to know about this. I don't want to be involved in this. Please, believe me when I tell you that you don't want to know." I started breaking down at that point. "Please, just let it go," I begged. I wasn't upset about what had happened to me. I hadn't cried about it. I was upset because I was scared to death that I would loose the best thing I ever had. We were in an almost abandoned hallway, no one stopping us.
"Can you take me home?" I asked. He nodded and we walked slowly out to his car.
"I was raped," I said to Josh. We were back at my house. The words came out naturally, as if I were reciting french verbs. I was stunned by them myself. Josh turned slowly.
"What?" he asked. I couldn't read his tone. "When?"
"Saturday," I whispered.
Very slowly, he put his arm around me, pulling me into him, holding me gently in his arms.
"Oh God," I whispered. "This is really happening."
Tuesday January 14th
"You want a subpoena based on what?" I asked.
"The baby wasn't Josh's. I think that he may have been killed by the person that she was cheating to him with." Olivia explained.
"Do you have any proof?"
"His medical records state that because of the measles when he was six, he's completely infertile. She claims that it's his baby."
"You have no case."
"Come on Alex, there must be something you can do."
"There might be one judge."
"You owe me," I said, handing the subpoena to Olivia. "It took twenty minutes to convince the judge to sign it."
"Okay, we have half an hour to get to her appointment," she said to Elliot. "Thanks Alex."
"Get the matters of conception over to the lab as soon as it's done," Cragen told them. "And make sure Jamie has a ride home. We still want her to cooperate as much possible. Then get over to the school and talk to some of her teachers. See if they've seen her with anyone else."
"And if they have?"
"Talk to him at school, if he looks good or admits that he was involved with her, bring him in."
"Don't you think this seems a bit much?" I asked. "They're kids."
"Would it be the first time a 'kid' committed a crime?" Cragen responded.
"Trust me, I have four of them. They're not kids for long anymore."
"Report back to me later," Cragen told them as they were putting their jackets on.
Elliot
"You're quiet," Olivia observed as we pulled into the parking lot. "Everything okay?"
"Just the case."
"Thinking about Maureen?"
"And Kathleen. And Elizabeth. Any of them could be Jamie. And her parents are completely clueless. Is that going to be me?"
"Jamie's parents don't know because they don't seem to care. You do."
I nodded. "Is that Jamie?"
Olivia looked out. "Yeah, that's her." We waited a minute, then opened the door and got out. We waited outside for another minute, until we saw her go in with a nurse.
"This is a subpoena for the matters of conception for Jamie Garner," she told the receptionist.
"I'll bring it to you as soon as it's done."
"Thanks." Less than half an hour later, we were back in the car, on our way to the lab.
"It makes me sick how fast that can be done," I said.
"What can be done?"
"An abortion. They can just take a life away in a heartbeat."
"Do you really believe that it's a life?"
"We all started that way."
"I don't want to get into this Elliot. There's nothing we can do to change it. It's not illegal, so it's not our problem."
"I guess," I muttered as she was getting out of the car to drop off the DNA. She was back within five minutes.
"Where to next?" she asked.
"Back to school."
"The minister of the crown tried to make you think that there is no psychological side effects of rape. They are, unfortunately, sadly mistaken. Although murder-" were the first words we heard when we went to find one of Josh's teachers.
"Anthony Shepard?" I asked, coming into the classroom. He looked up. He looked no more than twelve.
"James, take over as speaker, I'll be back in a minute." He came out into the hall and closed the door softly behind him.
"Detective Benson, Stabler. Special victims unit," Olivia introduced.
"Special victims unit. Is this about Jamie?"
Olivia and I exchanged glances. "No, it's about Josh Davis."
He looked confused. "Right," he said, something clicking.
"How well did you know him?" Olivia asked.
"Not too well. He was only in one of my classes."
"And you know his girlfriend?"
"Yeah. She's on my debating team, and I teach her three classes."
"Did you know of any problems he may have been having lately?"
"Not really. He's been a bit distracted lately. Nothing really noticeable."
"And Jamie?" I asked.
"She's been acting strange. For a month, she'd seem like she was working really hard, and then when she handed her work in, there'd be nothing on her sheet. And she lost her edge in debate for a couple of weeks. She seemed to be back lately."
"Has she ever mentioned any problems with him?"
"This isn't love shack. I'm not the best person to ask."
"Thanks for your time."
Olivia
Wednesday, January 15th
"I don't like that look on your face," I said to Elliot as I came in.
"DNA's in."
"And?"
"Not his. No one in the system."
I sat down. "So we got talk to her."
"You think that's going to work?"
"What other options do we have?"
"Can I get you something to drink?" I asked her. She still looked pale.
"I'm fine."
"How are you feeling?"
"I'm sorry if I sound rude, but why are you being so nice to me? I know I'm not here for small talk."
Something was still stopping me from going at her like we would with any other suspect. I still couldn't believe that she was involved, but nothing else made sense.
"Why did you lie to us?" I asked.
"About what?"
"About whose baby it was."
"It's. . . it was Josh's."
Elliot took the DNA test out of an envelop he had and pushed it towards her.
"What's this?"
"It's a DNA test confirming that Josh Davis was not the father of the fetus."
"So who was it Jamie?" he continued. "Your other boyfriend got mad at him, so he decided to kill Josh? Or did you ask him to? A dead boyfriend could really play in your favour. You get to be the victim."
"No," she said softly, her eyes welling up.
"Then what is it? Did you kill him yourself?"
"No."
"And what about Andrew Laurence? You blocked his number when the two of you got into a fight, and he decided to get back at you by killing your other boyfriend."
"No."
"Then how did it happen?" I knew that he was only coming on so strong, hoping she would crack. He didn't think she did it either. I had no idea why he was throwing around Andrew Laurence's name around. In a case like this, where the victim could have so easily been his son in a few years, he lost all patience.
"It's not what you think," she said. "I didn't kill Josh. I loved him. I really loved him."
"So what did happen? Were you cheating on him?"
She shook her head. "Two months ago, I went for a debate in Syracuse. The day before I left, Josh and I got into a fight. It was something stupid. I don't even remember what. We weren't leaving until the day after the tournament ended, so Saturday night, we were staying at the dorms and there was a party. I started talking to Andrew."
"Andrew Laurence?" I asked.
"Yeah. He was a second-year law student. He had also been one of my judges. We got into talking about the Columbia debate, and this case that I had been looking for everywhere. I had had a couple of drinks, and I didn't think too much of it when he asked if I had a computer in the room I was staying in. He was going to show me a website where I could access most case files."
"What happened when you got to the room?" I asked, afraid of where this was going.
"He closed the door, saying that it was too noisy in the hall. Then, before I had a chance to turn on the computer, he kissed me. I told him to stop. That I had a boyfriend. But he didn't. He threw me down on the bed and pulled down his pants. I said no. He ignored me, and he. . . he took off my jeans. Then he. . ." she trailed off and remained quiet for a minute, tears streaming down her face. I felt a knot growing in my stomach.
"When he was finished, he took off really fast. He just pulled up his pants and left. In the middle of it, Lauren, one of the girls I debate with, knocked on the door. I guess she heard me saying no or something, because she called Mr. Shepard was there ten minutes later."
"What did he say?" I asked.
"He asked if I was okay. I don't remember saying anything. I don't think I did."
"You didn't press charges?"
"I didn't want to."
"Did you see a doctor?"
"Not until Monday. One of the doctors said that I had untreated Chlamydia. I knew I didn't get it from Josh."
"And he started calling you?" Elliot asked.
She nodded. "A month ago. At first I could just hear breathing. Then he started talking. I had him blocked a week after he started calling."
"Have you seen or heard from him again?"
"No."
I just nodded.
Jamie
Saturday, November 9th
"Thank you Mr. Speaker. The government has just done a great job of telling you why we should pass this bill, and that's fine, but they have failed to mention what exactly is wrong with the status quo. Why would we go around changing laws if, as of late, there's nothing wrong with it. . ."
"You were great today," a male voice said from behind me. I turned around to find one of my judges, Andrew Laurence from earlier standing behind me.
"Thanks."
"How long have you been debating?"
"Since grade ten, so, uh, almost two years."
"You're really good. Have you thought about states?"
"A bit. It's far away. I have to get through regionals first."
"You'll do fine. Have you heard the resolution for Columbia yet?"
"Yeah. It's hard. Euthanasia."
"Have you read the Williams case file?"
"No. I've been trying to get a copy. It's supposed to make the affirmative's case."
"I've found this great website where you can get most case files."
"Really?"
"Yeah. Do you have a computer in your dorm?"
"Yeah."
"Do you want me to show you?"
I hesitated for a minute. I may have had two beers, but I wasn't sure about going alone with him. "Sure." I led him towards my room and unlocked it, slipping the key back in my pocket. I left the door open, but he closed it. I went to sit down at the computer, but he got to me first. He brought his mouth to mine and kissed me possessively.
"Stop," I told him, pushing him away, reaching for the doorknob. "Look, I have a boyfriend." He grabbed my wrists and threw me down onto the bed.
"Stop," I said again, my voice coming out more as a beg. "Don't."
He pulled his pants down, then ran his hand up my leg until he reached the waistline of my jeans and unsnapped them.
"No," I said softly. "Please, Andrew, stop."
"It's all good, baby," he grunted.
"Jamie?" a male voice asked. I recognized it right away. I didn't move to open the door. Two hours had passed. I didn't cry. I had just stayed there for twenty minutes, then managed to get up and spent an hour in the shower, the water as hot as I could get it, trying to burn the feeling of him off of me. Then I went into my Lauren's room (She wasn't there), feeling no better, checked every possible nook and cranny in the room, and sat down on her bed and just stared into space. Mr. Shepard hadn't bothered me until now.
I saw the handle on the door turning. I should have rethought going into Lauren's room. He'd still be able to get in. I turned away as he pushed open the door. He just stood there for a minute, before pulling a chair from the desk over and sitting close- careful not to sit too close- to me.
"What do you want?" I finally asked.
"Who did this to you?" He voice, although familiar, seemed distant, strange. I felt a drop of water from my hair slowly slide down my back, icy cold. I ignored it.
"I'm going to take you to the police, okay?" I still didn't look at him. I stared at a spot on the wall beside me where the paint had dripped when it had been painted. The trail got smaller and smaller, but never disappeared. Was that how my life would be? He would always be there.
"At least let me take you to get checked out." I still didn't say anything. He still sat there, not saying a word, not making a sound. I could barely hear him breathe.
"You can't just let this happen."
I stopped breathing for a minute when he said that. "Let it happen?" I asked, my voice monotone. "I didn't let this happen."
"That's not what I meant, Jamie."
"You know what, Mr. Shepard? I can understand you coming here. But just shove it." I wasn't monotone anymore. I was angry. At no one, but everyone at the same time. All I needed was someone to blame. He seemed like an easy target. "You haven't bothered to help me out, or take any interest in me. Until I started winning debates, you didn't know my name. You don't care. That bothered me for a long time, but honestly, I couldn't care less now. But you ignore me for all this time and now expect me to listen to you? You're whacked."
Wednesday, November 13th
"Are you mad at me?" Josh asked me. I turned around, closing my locker.
"No," I said simply, pulling my bag over my shoulder.
"Then what's wrong?"
"Nothing's wrong."
"Then why are you shutting me out?"
"I'm not shutting you out! God!"
"Jamie, I know you. I know you better than anyone. And I know you get this way when something really big is going on."
I turned around slowly to look at him. "Josh," I whispered. "What's going on right now, you don't want to know."
He looked stung by that comment. "Why's that?"
"It's too much, and too hard. I don't want to know about this. I don't want to be involved in this. Please, believe me when I tell you that you don't want to know." I started breaking down at that point. "Please, just let it go," I begged. I wasn't upset about what had happened to me. I hadn't cried about it. I was upset because I was scared to death that I would loose the best thing I ever had. We were in an almost abandoned hallway, no one stopping us.
"Can you take me home?" I asked. He nodded and we walked slowly out to his car.
"I was raped," I said to Josh. We were back at my house. The words came out naturally, as if I were reciting french verbs. I was stunned by them myself. Josh turned slowly.
"What?" he asked. I couldn't read his tone. "When?"
"Saturday," I whispered.
Very slowly, he put his arm around me, pulling me into him, holding me gently in his arms.
"Oh God," I whispered. "This is really happening."