Dancing With Your Ghost
Summary: Months following Damon's death at Silas' hands, Bonnie struggles to move on with her life.
Song Inspiration: Dancing with Your Ghost – Sasha Alex Sloan
Yelling at the sky
Screaming at the world
Baby, why'd you go away?
I'm still your girl
Holding on too tight
Head up in the clouds
Heaven only knows
Where you are now
How do I love
How do I love again?
How do I trust
How do I trust again?
I stay up all night
Tell myself I'm alright
Baby, you're just harder to see than most
I put the record on
Wait 'til I hear our song
Every night I'm dancing with your ghost
Every night I'm dancing with your ghost
…
New York City, NY – Present Day:
Bonnie shot out of bed, sweat beading on her forehead and the silk of her camisole sticking to her skin. The nightmares were getting worse. Sometimes she was able to convince herself they weren't real – horrifying scenarios that she had invented in her head, but then there were others; like this one, where they felt as real as the bed she slept in. Because they weren't dreams…they were memories.
Wiping her hand down her clammy face, Bonnie tossed the blankets off her and padded barefoot quietly to the bathroom down the hall. The wood flooring creaked beneath her feet, the only sound in the open concept loft. Only a month ago, she picked up her life and moved to New York, keeping her promise to Damon of going to Juilliard and starting over. Her father was grateful to get out of Mystic Falls. He had been so worried about her behavior as of late; sneaking off in the middle of the night as she'd done many times in the past few months, worried that one day, she'd break and he wouldn't know how to bring her back. And she didn't blame him. Bonnie had slipped into a dark place. Her torturing of Silas hardening the once compassionate and pure part of her.
But one night, in the cover of darkness, She and Stefan finally put an end to it.
.
Mystic Falls, VA – 2 Months Ago:
It was late, and there was a chill in the air making her breath visible in the darkness. She rubbed her hands on her thighs as she sat waiting on the steps of the cabin. When she saw the red Porsche headlights pull up, Bonnie rose to her feet.
Stefan stepped out, meeting her on the porch. "Sorry I'm late. I didn't want to wake Elena."
She nodded. "Did you bring it?"
"Yeah." He pulled the stone from the inside of his coat pocket and placed it in her waiting palm. "What is this thing anyways?" Bonnie had asked him to grab it from the drawer beside Damon's bed.
"It's the stone I used to channel the points of the expression triangle. It can hold a great deal of power." Bonnie felt the weight of it, heavy in her hand.
"Enough to kill a two-thousand-year-old wicked witch?"
Bonnie smirked. "And his little dog too." He huffed a little laugh, before it faltered. "Thank you for doing this with me."
"I wouldn't let you do this without me. I need this." He answered her seriously. "They killed my brother. I'm not letting them get away with it." The tension in his jaw and the hardened glare in his eyes spoke to his rage.
"Damon thinks that I'm taking it too far." She recalled her talk from earlier that day while she prepared their plan.
Letting out a drawn-out sigh Stefan responded. "Yeah well, he's dead now, so it's not like he can stop us." He responded bitterly. "Do you think it'll work?"
Bonnie stared down at the stone in her palm. "I don't know. But I have to try." They entered the cabin, to see Silas looking worse for wear; gaunt, gasping for air, eyes sunken and dark from malnutrition. Stefan stood on one side of him, while Bonnie came to stand on the other as Silas' eyes swung to look at her with fear. "Don't worry…I'll put you out of your misery soon enough. But first…you have something I need." Placing the stone on his chest, the witch covered it with both her hands. In hushed whispers, she began her incantation, closing her eyes and letting the magic flow through her.
Stefan watched as Silas became drained of his magic, sucking it out from every pore, making him look even more pale and sickly than he already did. The magic funneled into the stone, and it charged to a glowing, crackling red when the spell was complete. Bonnie silently tucked the stone into her pocket as she looked down at the once powerful, immortal witch Silas.
Her eyes hardened, as she released him from his paralysis, and he weakly pushed himself back against the headboard in attempt to get away from her. "How does it feel? To be powerless? To not know how to defend yourself against a greater power?"
"Bonnie, please…I'm sorry." Silas pleaded.
"Sorry isn't going to bring my brother back." Stefan grunted with a scowl. He turned determined eyes to Bonnie. "Do it."
Bonnie's lips pulled in a little smirk. "Phasmatos Incendia." And within seconds, his body went up in a whoosh of flames, his screams echoing through the room as they walked out, leaving him and the cabin to go up in a blaze.
Together, they watched it burn to the ground, feeling the therapeutic relief of closure wash over them. "One down…" Stefan commented.
With a tip of her chin, Bonnie sighed. "One to go."
.
New York City, NY – Present Day:
Katherine however, evaded them. Even with locator spells and eyes across the country, the vampire was always one step ahead of them. So, Bonnie did her best to distract herself while she bided her time. While killing Katherine was high on her priority list, there was one thing that ranked higher, but so far, it was proving fruitless. But she was determined.
Walking back into the bedroom, Bonnie stood in the center of the room, wondering what a life with Damon would have looked like here. She could feel him here everywhere; in every crack and crevice of this loft. Sometimes, she would picture him sitting in his favorite chair by the fireplace, or shaving in the mirror of the ensuite bathroom, making her dinner and catching her eyes over the kitchen island – small fleeting glimpses. His presence lately had been few and far between, and part of her was worried that he'd leave her forever.
Bonnie crossed to the record player, and dropped the stylus. The soft crackling of the old record filled the room, and she let the comforting melody wash over her. It was their song…the one they first danced to; the night everything changed. The one he sang lovingly in her ear in their last moment of happiness before he left her world. Closing her eyes, she waited, hoping he'd hear her call and would come to her.
She didn't have to wait long; she felt the chill surround her as Damon wrapped his arms around her from behind. "Where have you been?" her voice cracked painfully.
"I'm sorry. I've been…having a hard time finding my way." He stated uneasily.
Bonnie turned in his arms with worry. "What do you mean?"
She could see the concern and discomfort in his own eyes, and it only worried her more. "I feel like every time I get close to you, something pulls me back. Whatever it is doesn't want me here, Bonnie…" he admitted sadly.
Her chest rose and fell with panic. "But you said no one was over there. Who could be holding you back?"
He brushed the hair out of her face, a splinter of cold caressing her cheek. "I don't think it's a someone. I don't belong here…some force out there knows that." He broke to her gently. "I don't know how much longer I can stay here."
She shook her head profusely in denial. "No, no that's not going to happen. I can't lose you again." She clung to him desperately.
"I don't think we have a choice, baby…"
Bonnie's gaze snapped up to him with hope. "What if we did have a choice? What if…I could bring you back?"
He hung his head tiredly. "Bonnie, we talked about this…"
"Well, maybe we need to talk about it again. I've been doing some research-" she started, but Damon was quick to cut her off.
"Bringing someone back from the dead is against the laws of nature. Look at what it cost Katherine." He argued firmly. "If you let your magic turn that dark, who knows if you'll be able to come back from it."
She sucked in a breath. "Well, what if it wasn't my magic? Stefan and I-"
Damon stepped back. "You brought Stefan into this?"
"Stefan brought himself into it." She argued back. "Damon, Silas is dead. I have his magic, and I can use it to drop the veil between this world and your world. This will work!" she claimed excitedly.
Damon, however, looked unsure. "What if it doesn't?"
She grabbed his hands earnestly. "But what if it does!? I'm trying to move on, I'm trying to live my life without you but I can't. I need you here. Stefan needs you here. He's a mess, Damon." He nodded, bowing his head in acknowledgement. He'd seen his brother hanging on by a thread, clinging on to his memory with a desperate clutch. "The only thing holding him together right now is killing those responsible for your death. What happens when Katherine's dead? It's not going to magically make him better; it's not going to help him move on…he'll have nothing to channel his rage into and then what? He turns it off? And we all know what comes after that."
Damon was all too familiar. His brother was easily triggered when it came to his humanity, and he was watching him slowly spiral. Not even Elena was enough to reign him in, though she tried. "Okay…just…be careful." He pulled her close, guiding her arms to wrap around his neck before letting his link at the small of her back. "But right now…I want to savor this moment while we have it. How does that sound?" He graced her with a charming smile as they swayed to the song, and Bonnie relaxed into him.
"I think I can live with that."
…
Mystic Falls, VA:
"Stefan?!" Elena called out into the quiet boarding house.
He wasn't answering his phone, and she was starting to get worried. She watched him quickly decline after Damon's death; his only focus was revenge, he seemed to abandon all reason. She had thought after he killed Silas, Stefan would have found peace, but in reality, it only brought him more suffering. She walked through the house looking for him, checking the parlor room, and his room before slowly making her way down to Damon's room. There were many nights she found him in there; looking out the large windows, or sitting in his chair, and tonight was no different. Only tonight, he was on the floor, leaning against the bed with empty bourbon bottles around him.
"Stefan…" she rushed to his side, pulling the bottle from his grasp and tilting his chin to look at her. "Come on, let's get you up." She struggled to pull him up, but he was able to stagger to his feet long enough for her to plop him on the bed. "Are you okay?"
He scoffed. "No, I'm not okay, Elena." He spat in a drunken slur. "Can't you see that? I'm barely holding on. I was in town today, in the square…and there was this woman sitting on a bench." He started his story slowly, looking right into Elena's frightened eyes. "And I could smell the blood pumping in her jugular. Next thing I know I'm walking towards her and the voice – that voice in my head that tells me to stop…never said a word. I was going to rip her throat out in broad daylight, Elena."
She swallowed thickly. "Did you?"
Stefan bowed his head, giving it a little shake. "No…Alaric stopped me, but it didn't mean I didn't want to." He didn't miss Elena's sigh of relief. "Next time I might not be so lucky."
Elena lovingly ran her fingers through his hair. "What can I do? How can I help you?"
He laughed humorlessly. "You can't. I know you think you can but…I just need my brother." He whispered in a strained voice as tears pooled in my eyes.
Damon watched from the doorway with a sympathetic wince. "I'm right here, brother." He felt a whoosh from behind him, but when he glanced over his shoulder only the slight glimpse of a figure caught his eye. With one last look at Stefan, Damon followed the figure, only catching the tail ends of flowing dress as he turned each corner. He finally found himself at the old Salvatore property, which was nothing but rumble now, save for the maze that had seen better days. He walked through the hedges, knowing the path well until he finally found the figure standing in the middle, her back to him. "Emily?"
…
Bonnie furiously flipped through the pages of her grandmother's grimoire. "What am I missing?" She mumbled to herself. She was close; she could feel it. For days now, Bonnie had been attempting to reach out to Damon's world, trying to build a connection there so she could eventually drop the veil, but there was a block – like a wall that she couldn't penetrate. She could see it in the distance of her mind, but she was viewing it as if through a snow globe.
Her head shot up when she heard something crash and shatter in the living room, and Bonnie slowly got up from the center of the bed, walking cautiously towards the sound. "Hello?" There was no one there, but her coffee mug was smashed on the floor. "Damon?" She called out hesitantly. Suddenly the curtains opened, letting in a stream of light into the open concept living room, and she spun around in surprise. "If you think I'm afraid of a little ghost, you're sadly mistaken." She announced. "Where I come from, it's a daily occurrence."
"I don't want to hurt you, Bonnie. We are family after all." Bonnie spun around again to see a woman standing there, hands linked in front of her. She wore a bonnet that covered her dark locks and heavy skirts that fell to the floor.
The young witch, eyed her curiously. "Who are you?"
She smiled pleasantly. "I'm Emily. And I'm here to help you."
…
AN: There is the first part of this epilogue! I thought it was going to be a one shot, but I think there is another chapter or two here. Hope you like it! Please review! - Vanessa