"Orphans, I have exciting news for you," called Mr.Snow from the back of his house.
NOTE: Just because Mr.Snow announces to the Beausinclairs that he has exciting news for them does not imply that it is actually exciting news. I am only forewarning you against being overjoyed at the prospect of this apparently exciting but actually unexciting news, so as you will not be happy and finally think that here, in the fourth chapter of this story, the Beausinclair's bad luck comes to an end. It does not. This is a warning against believing that unexciting news is actually exciting.
As the children entered the house their grim faces began to perk up at the thought of false exciting news that they then thought was true exciting news. "What is it Mr.Snow?" Violet asked excitedly, her siblings just as excited. He appeared from a doorway that led to the back of his house, where he was positioned before he went through the doorway that, in his situation, led to the front of the house, but, if you were already positioned at the front of the house, would lead to the back of the house.
"Well, we contacted your parents' solicitor, and he has revealed their will to me. You are to be placed in the care of an illustrious count. His name is Count Ojar," Mr.Snow informed them.
"Count Ojar?!? But isn't he a foul criminal?" exclaimed Klyde, here using the phrase "foul criminal", which means "dastardly law-breaker", and could describe some of my most fearsome enemies.
"No, no, no. You're talking about Count Ofar. And foul wouldn't be the right word to describe a criminal. The word "fowl" is used to describe several types of birds," Mr.Snow incorrectly corrected.
"But, Mr.Snow, Klyde meant "foul", as in "awful"," Vivian told him. Mr.Snow ignored her.
"So, when would you like to meet your guardian? Today?" and then, without waiting for an answer, "All right, let's go."
The children, despite Mr.Snow's lack of grammar skills, agreed. Mr.Snow led them to his automobile, which is a fancy word for "car", and they all climbed in. It was a long drive across the city to Count Ojar's house, which could more appropriatly be called "Count Ojar's Dark Dungeon of Death That Slightly Resembled a House", as the Beausinclairs saw when they got there. After they all got out of the automobile, which,as I have told you, is a fancy word for "car", Sandra whispered to her brother and her sister.
"Frithup?" she said, meaning "we're going to live here?".
"I'm afraid so, Sandra. I'm afraid so," Klyde answered, taking in a deep breath. The children all stared in fear at the "house", which looked more like "A Dark Dungeon Of Death That Slightly Resembled A House". Then Mr.Snow spoke up.
"It's a beautiful place, isn't it?" he asked them, thinking that it wasn't a beautiful place at all, which it wasn't. "Oh, well, gotta go. E njoy your lives children." With that, he hopped into the car and, before the Beausinclairs could protest, sped away.
"Hello, orphans," said a voice that, for the rest of their lives, would send chills down the Beausinclairs' spines every time they heard it.