Lost, Confused, Unkind (Sequel To "Freaked")
Chapter 10
When we got back tot he hotel I was warn out, I couldn't even imagine how Matt felt. While he was in the shower I threw my case on the bed & rummaged around for my Pj's but I couldn't find them! I was sure I'd packed them & it was driving me crazy, so I began to pull everything out of the case & heap it on the bed.
"What's goin' on?" Matt said, coming into the bedroom drying his hair with a towel.
"I've lost something!" I mumbled as I heaped more clothes onto the bed.
"Ahhh the old secret compartment with a million dollars hidden inside!" Matt grinned.
"What?" I snapped, getting totally frustrated.
"Nothin'. What have you lost?"
"My Pj's! I know I packed them last thing, they should've just been right here on top of everything!"
"Maybe you just forgot them?"
"No I didn't! I know I.....Matt where did you leave these cases?"
"They were in my car all night why?"
"You didn't take them into the arena?"
"NO....erm why would I take them into the arena?!" He laughed.
"I don't know...I just...I know I packed them!" I ran my fingers through my hair & sighed.
"Look, even if I had took them into the arena why would someone just open them & steal your nightwear? Come on Bec you just forgot to pack them that's all!"
"I didn't!"
"Forget the damn PJ's already!" He came over & put his arms around my waist from behind. "Jeez you can borrow one of my shirts to sleep in if ya want?"
I sighed & nodded. The fact that I could borrow his shirt wasn't the point! I knew for a fact that I'd packed those damn pjamas in my case & I just couldn't understand why they weren't there now!! Matt kissed my neck & I leaned my head back onto him. "Better still, maybe I wont lend you a shirt!" Matt grinned & i playfully smacked the top of his head. "Anyway is something else bugging you? It ain't just the mysterious vanishing pjamas is it?"
I turned around, "what do you mean?"
"Well you seem a little stressed out over somethin' that's all?"
"Ah its nothin', I'm just a bit tired I guess!"
"Sure?"
"Yes I'm sure!"
"Come on then lets go to bed! I'll help you put all this stuff back!" He looked at the heaps of clothes on the bed, "Man I told ya to pack for three weeks not three months!" He shook his head.
*******
I didn't sleep much, so when it was time to get up I felt like shit & probably looked even worse! I'd had dreams, I couldn't really call them nightmares because they weren't really scarey but they'd sure as hell unnerved me! I dreamed about Mick, but instead of the usual nightmares about him attacking me, they were dreams about the good times. The day we moved into the flat, the night he asked me to marry him, taking Jake to the zoo...I couldn't understand where they'd come from!! When I woke up my head was spinning with fragmented visions of him happy & smiling! I could hear Matt in the bathroom & I felt a little safer. I rolled over onto my back &looked at the celing remembering how I'd done this so many times at home, listening to Mick humming a tune as he got ready to go to work. How the smell of his cologne would waft into the bedroom.....I sat up & sniffed the air...I could SMELL IT!!! I threw back the covers & stood up, sniffing again, the smell was still there, the smell of Tommy Hillfiger cologne that I used to love so much, only now it made me sick to my stomach! Slowly I made my way to the bathroom, tiptoeing, afraid that I was still in a dream & afraid of what I would see when I opened the bathroom door.
Carefully I peered through the crack in the door, my heart racing & my throat feeling like it was about to close up.
The bathroom was full of steam so I pushed the door slightly, holding my breath when I saw the figure by the basin. I closed my eyes.
"Matt?" I said quietly but there was no answer. "Matt?" I said again, still standing there with my eyes closed. Suddenly I was yanked into the bathroom, the smell of Tommy was overwhelming & I almost gagged! Lips pressed hard against mine & I pushed against the person in front of me & let out a scream.
"Woah what the fu..."
I opened my eyes slowly & saw Matt standing in front of me, naked from the waist up. I was almost gasping for breath & the smell of that God awful cologne was still in the air, so think that it felt like I was drinking the damn stuff! "What was that for?" Matt said looking confused. "Bec? What's goin on?" I coughed & put a hand to my throat "Bec? Jesus.." He came towards me & put his hands out but I swiped them away.
"Wh....." I gasped, "What's cologne is that??"
"What?"
"I...I said what the fuck is that smell?" I yelled.
"Bec what is the problem?!"
I went over to his bag that was beside the basin & started rummaging through it scattering the contents all over the floor.
"BEC?! What the.......what are you doing?" Matt just stood back & watched me throwing this hissey fit!
I found what I was looking for, the bottle of Tommy & I picked it up and held it in front of my face. "Where did you get this?!"
Matt ran a hand through is hair & sighed, "It's cologne!"
"I KNOW WHAT IT IS I ASKED WHERE YOU GOT THE FUCKING THING!!!" I shouted, almost hysterically. Matt just looked at it in my hand, totally bewildered & confused as to why his girlfriend was throwing a mental over a bottle of cologne! I didn't wait for an answer! I just launched the bottle across the room at the wall, where it shattered on the tiles & pieces of glass crashed into the bathtub. Matt ducked when the bottle flew past his head & now he stood, half crouched, staring at the wall in disbelief.
I was doing the same, I couldn't believe I just smashed his bottle of cologne against the wall! It was like Id been possessed by some unknown idiot & I was just now starting to come back to my senses!! I was shaking & tears fell down my cheeks. Slowly Matt began to straighten up, looking from me to the wall & then back to me again.
"Hmmm...." he cleared his throat. "I....erm...." he scratched his head, "erm right!" he nodded. "Guess I better clean this up then." he turned away but the look he gave me as he went to the bathtub said it all! He thought I'd gone psycho! I wanted to tell him why Id done it...I opened my mouth but nothing would come out! Instead I just went back out of the door & into the bedroom. I called the reception & explained that a bottle of cologne had been dropped in the bathtub & asked if someone could please come & clean it up. They said it wasn't a problem & someone would be up as soon as we left. I thanked them & as I was hanging up the phone Matt appeared in the doorway.
Chapter 10
When we got back tot he hotel I was warn out, I couldn't even imagine how Matt felt. While he was in the shower I threw my case on the bed & rummaged around for my Pj's but I couldn't find them! I was sure I'd packed them & it was driving me crazy, so I began to pull everything out of the case & heap it on the bed.
"What's goin' on?" Matt said, coming into the bedroom drying his hair with a towel.
"I've lost something!" I mumbled as I heaped more clothes onto the bed.
"Ahhh the old secret compartment with a million dollars hidden inside!" Matt grinned.
"What?" I snapped, getting totally frustrated.
"Nothin'. What have you lost?"
"My Pj's! I know I packed them last thing, they should've just been right here on top of everything!"
"Maybe you just forgot them?"
"No I didn't! I know I.....Matt where did you leave these cases?"
"They were in my car all night why?"
"You didn't take them into the arena?"
"NO....erm why would I take them into the arena?!" He laughed.
"I don't know...I just...I know I packed them!" I ran my fingers through my hair & sighed.
"Look, even if I had took them into the arena why would someone just open them & steal your nightwear? Come on Bec you just forgot to pack them that's all!"
"I didn't!"
"Forget the damn PJ's already!" He came over & put his arms around my waist from behind. "Jeez you can borrow one of my shirts to sleep in if ya want?"
I sighed & nodded. The fact that I could borrow his shirt wasn't the point! I knew for a fact that I'd packed those damn pjamas in my case & I just couldn't understand why they weren't there now!! Matt kissed my neck & I leaned my head back onto him. "Better still, maybe I wont lend you a shirt!" Matt grinned & i playfully smacked the top of his head. "Anyway is something else bugging you? It ain't just the mysterious vanishing pjamas is it?"
I turned around, "what do you mean?"
"Well you seem a little stressed out over somethin' that's all?"
"Ah its nothin', I'm just a bit tired I guess!"
"Sure?"
"Yes I'm sure!"
"Come on then lets go to bed! I'll help you put all this stuff back!" He looked at the heaps of clothes on the bed, "Man I told ya to pack for three weeks not three months!" He shook his head.
*******
I didn't sleep much, so when it was time to get up I felt like shit & probably looked even worse! I'd had dreams, I couldn't really call them nightmares because they weren't really scarey but they'd sure as hell unnerved me! I dreamed about Mick, but instead of the usual nightmares about him attacking me, they were dreams about the good times. The day we moved into the flat, the night he asked me to marry him, taking Jake to the zoo...I couldn't understand where they'd come from!! When I woke up my head was spinning with fragmented visions of him happy & smiling! I could hear Matt in the bathroom & I felt a little safer. I rolled over onto my back &looked at the celing remembering how I'd done this so many times at home, listening to Mick humming a tune as he got ready to go to work. How the smell of his cologne would waft into the bedroom.....I sat up & sniffed the air...I could SMELL IT!!! I threw back the covers & stood up, sniffing again, the smell was still there, the smell of Tommy Hillfiger cologne that I used to love so much, only now it made me sick to my stomach! Slowly I made my way to the bathroom, tiptoeing, afraid that I was still in a dream & afraid of what I would see when I opened the bathroom door.
Carefully I peered through the crack in the door, my heart racing & my throat feeling like it was about to close up.
The bathroom was full of steam so I pushed the door slightly, holding my breath when I saw the figure by the basin. I closed my eyes.
"Matt?" I said quietly but there was no answer. "Matt?" I said again, still standing there with my eyes closed. Suddenly I was yanked into the bathroom, the smell of Tommy was overwhelming & I almost gagged! Lips pressed hard against mine & I pushed against the person in front of me & let out a scream.
"Woah what the fu..."
I opened my eyes slowly & saw Matt standing in front of me, naked from the waist up. I was almost gasping for breath & the smell of that God awful cologne was still in the air, so think that it felt like I was drinking the damn stuff! "What was that for?" Matt said looking confused. "Bec? What's goin on?" I coughed & put a hand to my throat "Bec? Jesus.." He came towards me & put his hands out but I swiped them away.
"Wh....." I gasped, "What's cologne is that??"
"What?"
"I...I said what the fuck is that smell?" I yelled.
"Bec what is the problem?!"
I went over to his bag that was beside the basin & started rummaging through it scattering the contents all over the floor.
"BEC?! What the.......what are you doing?" Matt just stood back & watched me throwing this hissey fit!
I found what I was looking for, the bottle of Tommy & I picked it up and held it in front of my face. "Where did you get this?!"
Matt ran a hand through is hair & sighed, "It's cologne!"
"I KNOW WHAT IT IS I ASKED WHERE YOU GOT THE FUCKING THING!!!" I shouted, almost hysterically. Matt just looked at it in my hand, totally bewildered & confused as to why his girlfriend was throwing a mental over a bottle of cologne! I didn't wait for an answer! I just launched the bottle across the room at the wall, where it shattered on the tiles & pieces of glass crashed into the bathtub. Matt ducked when the bottle flew past his head & now he stood, half crouched, staring at the wall in disbelief.
I was doing the same, I couldn't believe I just smashed his bottle of cologne against the wall! It was like Id been possessed by some unknown idiot & I was just now starting to come back to my senses!! I was shaking & tears fell down my cheeks. Slowly Matt began to straighten up, looking from me to the wall & then back to me again.
"Hmmm...." he cleared his throat. "I....erm...." he scratched his head, "erm right!" he nodded. "Guess I better clean this up then." he turned away but the look he gave me as he went to the bathtub said it all! He thought I'd gone psycho! I wanted to tell him why Id done it...I opened my mouth but nothing would come out! Instead I just went back out of the door & into the bedroom. I called the reception & explained that a bottle of cologne had been dropped in the bathtub & asked if someone could please come & clean it up. They said it wasn't a problem & someone would be up as soon as we left. I thanked them & as I was hanging up the phone Matt appeared in the doorway.