-+- Standard Disclaimer -+-
The characters depicted in this story are not mine. Ranma 1/2 and all other related characters belong to Rumiko Takahashi. Story is partially based on "All You Zombies" By Robert Heinlein. I have written All You Ranmas purely for entertainment.
-+- End of Disclaimer -+-
All You Ranmas
A fiction novella by Dave Zhang (dzhang@its.caltech.edu). Comments and criticisms welcomed. Copyright 2002.
"This text is spoken." 'This text is thought.'
Chapter 4: Evidence
"Come now, Ranma, don't you trust your own father?" Genma was starting to become uncomfortable with the shrinking circular cordon surrounding him. "Tendo, you're my best friend. Would I lie to you?"
Upon sensing doubtful looks on Ranma and Soun's visages, Genma decided to try another tact. "The truth is exactly as Nodoka said. I never brought it up because I didn't want to relive those bad memories. Ranko's been dead for more than seventeen years, bringing her up as a topic of conversation definitely won't bring her back to life."
That seemed to convince Ranma and the more naive members of the Tendo household -- i.e. everyone but Nabiki. As one extremely skilled in politics and diplomacy, Nabiki didn't let her mistrust become diaphanous.
'Ranma has a sister who died at birth? Maybe, but I smell something fishy here, and it's definitely not Akane's cooking...' Nabiki quickly brainstormed and outlined in her brain the simplest and thus most likely explanations. 'Okay, possibilities: 1. Ranma really did have a sister who died at birth has Genma says, but somehow Genma either directly or indirectly caused her death. 2. Ranma really was born a girl, and she feel into Nannichuan, instead of the supposed story of him being a guy and falling into Nyannichuan.' Nabiki shook her head that that idea, 'No, that can't be right. Ranma's way too dense to be a girl, and besides, hot water reverses the curse. So unless Shampoo really is a cat, and Ryoga a pig, Ramna probably was born as a guy. 3. Ranma had a sister, but Genma did not want to have a daughter, and put her up for adoption or something... Hm... that could be interesting. If Ranma's twin sister is half as hot as Ranma's female form --and if I can find her-- I could make a lot of yen selling her pictures.'
Suddenly Nabiki made a mental connection, 'Wait! Ranma's and Akane's birthdays aren't that far apart. Could it be possible?' Nabiki slipped her sister a furtive glance. 'Hm... Now that I think about it, Ranma and Akane are really alike in a lot of ways. Boy, wouldn't that be ironic?'
Nabiki mentally added investigating Ranma's sister to her mental list of top priority things to do.
Ranma, as usual, was suspicious of his father, yet tactless enough as to try to elicit the information the only he thought he could -- through force.
As Ranma ran around the yard chasing his father, Nabiki excused herself and left the house for the Nerima General Hospital.
***
Nabiki felt stupid... really stupid. 'Hmrph! Ranma's forwardness must be contagious or something. How unlike me to coming rushing to the hospital without doing my research in advance?' Nabiki sighed. This is going to cost a lot more than it should.
"Please," Nabiki insisted, "this is urgent. My friend Ranma Saotome is dying in bed right now! Tt was a congenital blood condition, so I really need to see the doctor who delivered Ranma. Ranma didn't want me to worry over it, so Ranma didn't tell me the doctor's name, but I GOT TO KNOW. Please, there must be something I can do to help my friend." As she finished, her crocodile tears started flowing.
"Well," said the lady at desk, staring at the forms Nabiki filled out, "I'm really not supposed to disclose that information, but..." 'The ten-thousand yen note that I slipped in between the forms is being an awfully good diplomat though,' Nabiki thought to herself. The lady had already started typing into the computer, and Nabiki's heart leapt with joy.
"Ranma Saotome? I delivered her." Nabiki was brought out of her reverie. A man in his fifties had apparently walked into the room was Nabiki was busy convincing the lady at the counter. "Come with me and we'll talk in private." Nabiki followed the man to a nearby office, while silently damning her bad luck for having spent money pointlessly.
"So," said the doctor after taking a seat and offering Nabiki a chair, "you said that Ranma's having blood problems? I'm just an obstetrician, so I don't know too much about blood disorders, but I'll try to help as much as I can."
"Did Ranma have a congenital blood disorder?"
"She shouldn't have. Erythroblastosis fetalis shouldn't affect the firstborn child of a couple, but just to be sure, I had ran a more-thorough blood test on her, and as I recall, she turned out to be completely healthy."
Nabiki eyed the doctor carefully, "You remember the blood test results of all the children you've delivered these twenty-odd years? I must say I'm impressed."
"No, that's not it!" The doctor laughed. "It's just that the circumstances of her birth were quite unusually and thus left me a deep imprint in my head..." The doctor laughed again, "and in more ways that one." He turned his head to reveal a portion of his skull which seemed rather flat compared to the rest of it. "Yep, this was due to Ranma's father."
Nabiki's eyes bulged. "How did that happen?"
"Well, let's just say that Ranma's father wasn't very happy that Ranma will never have any siblings. Or the fact that Ranma was given a boy's name. Heh, but that was the notary's problem."
"How sad, doomed to be an only child." Nabiki couldn't imagine life without her sisters, even her adopted sister Akane. Then the full force of realization hit her. 'She had been given a boy's name.... she turned out to be completely healthy.' Nabiki thought quickly and efficiently. She tested the waters, "Heh, right, but at least Ranma's twin will always spiritually be with Ranma, right?" Nabiki thought this was the safest question to ask to cover all bases.
The doctor did a double-take. "What? Ranma didn't have a twin."
***
Nabiki left the hospital very satisfied. For someone who started off by just wandering into a hospital, she had accrued a huge mass of useful knowledge in little more than two hours. She had managed to convince the doctor that perhaps they were talking about two different people. The doctor agreed after Nabiki disclosed that the Ranma she knew was a guy. But, in Nabiki's mind, there was no doubt that she had just talked to the doctor who delivered Genma and Nodoka's baby. Nabiki wasn't God though; she had nowhere near figured out the truth, but she did just receive a huge stack of chips to use against Genma.
As soon as she got home, she made several phone calls. 'Genma,' Nabiki secretly vowed, 'I'll the truth out of you yet.'
***
One week later: May 9, 1998
"Kasumi, don't bother cooking. I ordered sushi for the family tonight. Should be here any minute now."
"Oh my, are you sure we can afford that right now?"
"Don't worry about it, big sister, I got everything under control."
"Well, all right then. It'd be nice to have sushi. We haven't had it in so long!"
At this point, Akane walked in, and said, "Kasumi, can I help you cook?"
Kasumi smiled sweetly and said, "Nabiki's ordering sushi tonight, so we're not cooking, Akane."
"Oh..." said a seemingly disappointed Akane. "I'll just go practice some more katas then."
"Say Akane," said Nabiki, "do you want to help us prepare the candied ginger and wasabi?"
"I'd love to!" said an emphatically happy Akane.
Nabiki smiled. Everything was going according to plan so far. The doorbell sounded, and Nabiki ran to get it. She paid off the delivery boy, and a few minutes later everyone was gathered at the dining room eating sushi.
"Oh my, I'm suddenly feeling very tired," said Kasumi. "Yeah, me too," Nabiki yawned, "I can't seem to stay awake any..." and toppled over, asleep. Kasumi soon followed suit. Ranma, Genma, Soun, and Akane did not fade as quickly, having been trained in martial arts, but quickly sleep overtook them as well.
Nabiki waited for another fifteen minutes to make sure all of them were really asleep, and then got up, and proceed to drag everyone except Genma to their respective rooms.
***
Genma woke up and found himself in a dark room. He started feeling the wall from where he started in attempt find the exit, but before he got halfway across, a door opposite him open, and bright light flooded in. Genma raised his arms to shield his dilated pupils, and then the light disappeared as suddenly as it appear, the door once again closed now.
Genma was about to walk toward the door when his pupils became readjusted to the darkness, and he realized that a... thing... had come in when the door opened.
The thing walked towards him, making distinct sounds of chains rattling. Genma's pupils by this time have become more readjusted to darkness and realized the visage of the unexpected visitor was that of a ghastly young woman. Blood streaked across her face, her clothes were tattered, and binding her hands and feet were thick chains which made ominous rattles at her every movement.
"Father..." moaned the phantom in a surreal voice as she approached Genma, "Father how you have made me suffer!"
Genma's teeth were setting a steady allegro tempo by now, which accompanied the andante dripping of fluids from the crotch of his pants.
"What are you talking about?"
"Father why did you abandon me? Father I died because of you! Father I spent the last ten years of my life being tortured in Hell!"
Genma quickly got down on his knees and begged for mercy. "Please daughter! Don't take me to Hell with you! Please daughter! I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry. Please try to understand, you can't take me just yet! Ranma needs me!"
Nabiki decided to take a gamble, and roared, "But I'm Ranma!"
Genma cringed and started sobbing, "Yes, yes, Ranma my bo-.. daughter, you are Ranma. Akito... who's going by Ranma right now... is your foster brother who I adopted right after I abandoned you at birth. I'm so sorry I abandoned you. I had no idea that Yamato bastard would end up getting you killed though! So..."
"It's still your fault!" roared Nabiki as she flailed her chains wildly missing Genma by but inches. Inside Nabiki's brain was going haywire. 'Ranma's actually adopted? His real name is Akito? Genma's daughter is living with a guy called Yamato? First thing tomorrow I'm going to try to find her.'
"Yes, yes, it's completely my fault." said Genma while attempting to strafe to the left, having been forced with his back to the wall now.
If Genma had gone to the Furikan school play last year, he would have realized that this is the all from 'A Chrismas Carol.' As he did not, however, he is being scared shitless by Nabiki. Nabiki, on the other hand, was praising Kami-sama for her good luck and celebrated silently, 'Things are going just perfect! This is too easy. I'm getting so much information this way! Ranma isn't really Genma's son, so all his fiance problems are nullified! Well, all except Shampoo's and Kodachi's anyway.'
Nabiki decided to press her advantage. "Why did you abandon me and then adopt Akito? Why!? I would have tried my best to be a good daughter! Why didn't you give me the chance?"
"The doctor told me that I couldn't have any more children! And I really wanted a boy to carry on the name of Anything-Goes! And besides, I thought Yamato would be able to provide you with a better life than I could!"
"That was irresponsible of you!" roared Nabiki as she charged towards Genma. Unfortunately, in the absence of light, Nabiki did not see that she was stepping right into the middle of the puddle formed by Genma's less-manly fluids. The wetness, combined with the chains she had to lug around which were constantly throwing her balance off, caused Nabiki to slip and fall. Genma, chose this time to demonstrate the Saotome final attack of Running Away, and bolted out the door that Nabiki came in from.
"Damn!" Nabiki screamed silently. Her original plan was to leech as much information as she could out of Genma, and then hit him with with a tranquilizer when she was done, so that the next day Genma would think it was all a dream. Now Genma will know that something actually happened, and that someone knows his secret. And though Genma wasn't the brightest guy in Japan, he had enough sense to realize that Nabiki is probably the only person who knew him well enough to pull this off. That would tip her hand too much. "Damn!" screamed Nabiki loudly now.
She walked out of the cabin severely depressed when she noticed Genma not many feet away, lying face-down in a prone position. On his back, Nabiki noticed a small dart. Nabiki ran over to check check Genma's pulse, and after having assured herself that Genma was still alive, she called out into the forest, "Whoever you are out there, I don't know if you intended it, but you have helped me greatly tonight. Thank you. I won't forget this." She then slugged Genma over her shoulder and proceeded slowly back to Nerima.
Somewhere hidden in the bushes and trees, a person smiled, "No, you better not."
***
"Oh... what happened?" asked a bleary-eyed Ranma as he woke up from his unnatural sleep the next day. He turned and tried to shake Genma awake. Upon being touched by Ranma, Genma bolted upright and screamed, "Don't take me to Hell with you!" Ranma knocked his father on the head and shouted, "What on earth are you talking about!?" Genma, upon realizing his surroundings, sighed out happily, "Oh, whew, it was just a dream."
"What was your dream about that got you so scared?" asked Ranma.
"Eh, heh, heh, nothing, nothing particular. Just scary, that's all." said Genma.
In another half an hour the rest of the household was up, and gathered around the dining room to discuss why everyone suddenly fell asleep at the dinner table yesterday.
"Could it be that crazy girl Kodachi again?" asked Akane.
"No, I didn't get abducted or anything; can't be her," said Ranma. Then, eying Akane suspiciously, "Say, you didn't cook anything last night did you?"
"Well, I helped make the candied ginger and wasabi," replied a now very nervous Akane.
"Ah..." said everyone as they parted to do their separate things, as if all had suddenly become clear.
"Hey!" screamed Akane, "Weren't we going to investigate why our food was drugged?"
"Feh. It's obvious. You helped out. You probably mistook rat poison for soy sauce or something. We're lucky to be all still alive."
"RAN...MA..."
"I mean, Oyaji's got a pretty tough stomach when he's in panda form, so he can eat your cooking without taking too many years off his expected lifespan, but the rest of us human don't!"
The bird all started flying five seconds later, startled by the deafening noise of human flesh impacting roof shingles.
"Ran-chan, your mouth is going to take off more years of your life than Akane's cooking is," sighed Nabiki as Ranma sailed overhead. Nabiki froze. 'Did I just call him Ran-chan?' Fortunately, Ranma was busy screaming things about violent tomboys and thus didn't make out exactly what Nabiki said.
***
Meanwhile, the other person in Nerima who refers to Ranma as Ran-chan was having an emotional tempest. "Damn you Ran-chan! It's been several weeks now. Even if you don't want me to be your fiancee, I'm still your best friend! How could you just stop coming here completely?"
"Ukyo-san?" said Konatsu.
"WHAT!?"
"Er... the mail's here. They're a letter from your father."
Ukyo calmed herself down a bit, and tore into the letter.
"Daddy's coming!!!"
// Afterthoughts on the chapter
Anyone come up with a better plan than Nabiki?
Hm... I wonder what Ukyo appeared at the end of the chapter for? Ha! You won't find out until I get done writing the next part.
Sorry I haven't updated so long. Lab work is pretty busy. Boss promised to take us all to Japan if we make a successful DNA oscillator by the end of the school year, so I've been working on that. I definitely plan on finishing this series, though it will be long and take a while. --Dave