Lost, Confused, Unkind (Sequel To "Freaked")
Chapter 64
Next morning when I opened my eyes it was 11am! Jude wasn't in his crib so I figured Jeff had taken him out somewhere. When I'd had a wash & got dressed I went downstairs to find, to my surprise, that it was Gilbert playing with Jude, not Jeff! He was waving a rattle in his face & 'Coochy - Cooing' at him & I had to laugh.
"Hey there cheeky boy!" I kissed the top of Jude's head, "Are you playing with gramps?"
"Yeah he's got old Gramps feeling his age I can tell you!"
"Aw you should have woken me! I can't believe I slept so late!"
"He was ok with the old man! I thought you could do with the rest, believe me if there had been any sign of a dirty diaper I'd have woken you in a flash!" he winked, "But uncle Jeff changed him & fed him before he went to work! Didn't he little fella?" he tickled Jude.
"Jeff's gone already?"
"Yeah! He left your passes & tickets in the drawer over there, he managed to get 5 is that ok?"
"Um yeah, I guess Betty can get hers from Chris! What time do we need to be there?"
"You & your friends can go anytime you're ready!"
"You're not coming?"
"Well someone has to stay here & look after the baby!"
"Oh I can't ask you to do that! I was just gonna take him with me!"
"Don't you worry about us, we've got company coming over tonight to help us out!" he smiled.
"Oh yeah? Let me guess….hmmm can she cook by any chance?"
"Like an angel!" he winked.
"Oh well it aint Mary then!"
"Hey don't let her catch you talking like that!" Gilbert laughed.
"Don't worry I won't! You want a coffee?"
"Yeah please!" he smiled, "You seem to be in better spirits today, so was Jeff! I take it you two made up?"
"Yeah we did!" I smiled.
"Made up as in….."
"No!" I laughed, "We're just friends again that's all!"
"Ah well I'm glad to hear it! The way you two were screaming at each other I thought…….well it doesn't matter what I thought!"
"Well it's all cool so no need to worry!"
"I wasn't worried!" he smiled, "You two will figure it out yourselves in your own time!"
I wrinkled my brow, "Figure what out?"
"You have this strange affect on each other…..this really weird thing!"
"Oh & what's that?" I laughed.
"You make each other as miserable as sin one day & the next you make each other happy again!"
"It's called friendship!"
"It's called marriage!"
"Are you feeling ok Gilbert? Too much of the old moonshine last night or something?" I laughed.
"Ah you mock me now but just you wait! Everything will fall into place from now on in, I have a good feeling about it!" he picked up the newspaper & started to read. I just stood there, completely confused & convinced he'd been sniffing on newsprint or something! Still, He did have a smile on his face for hours & I put that down to Mary! Maybe he took the advice he'd been so keen to give me, it was nice to see him happy that was for sure! It had been a long time coming, for all of us!
Betty arrived with Andrew at around 2pm, closely followed by Sasha with her eldest, Josh. The boys were so hyped up, giggling & running around & it was chaos!
"I think we should go before Gilbert has a heart attack!" Sasha whispered to me after half an hour of mayhem, one spilled juice on the living room carpet & a grazed knee when Andrew tripped up the porch steps!
"Sure!" I smiled, "I'll just go & get the tickets!"
I went into the living room & pulled open the drawer of the dresser. The tickets & passes were there, along with an envelope which just said 'Bec' on the front! I frowned & opened it up. Inside was a piece of paper folded in half with the word 'Sorry' written on one side. It was Jeff's handwriting but I had no clue what it was or why he'd left it! I opened it up, the header on the top of the page read "CHRISTINA ROSSETTI 1930 - 94" & upon further inspection I saw that it was a page that had been torn from a book.
"REMEMBER
Remember me when I am gone away
Gone far away into the silent land
When you can no more hold me by the hand
Nor I half turn to go yet turning stay
Remember me when no more day by day
You tell me of our future that you planned
Only remember me; you understand
It will be too late to councel then or pray
Yet if you should forget me for a while
And afterwards remember do not grieve
For if the darkness & corruption leave
A vestige of the thoughts that I once had
Better by far you should forget & smile
Than that you should remember & be sad."
Tears welled up in my eyes & as I blinked they rolled down my cheeks.
"Hey are those tickets…oh hey hun! What's wrong?" Sasha put her arm around me when she saw I was upset & I sniffed.
"Oh nothing, it's a long story!" I wiped my face, "Just something that Jeff left for me!"
"Are you ok?"
"Yeah! Come on let's get out of here!" I smiled & folded the piece of paper back up & put it into my pocket.
***
Things were buzzing when we got to the arena a little after 3pm that afternoon. Wrestlemania was just a few hours away & everyone was pumped up & ready to go! We walked down to the ring first & sat & watched Kurt going through his paces with a sparring partner, when he was done he came over to say hi & signed the boy's programs that Shannon had managed to steal from somewhere!! I liked Kurt, he was one of the world's nice guys! Friendly & genuine, yep Karen Angle was definitely one lucky woman!
While we were talking to Kurt, Chris came up behind Betty & hoisted her into the air and she screamed!
"Chris you idiot!" She playfully swiped his chest when he put her down & then kissed his lips passionately.
"Ahem!" Sasha cleared her throat then gestured her head towards the two kids when Betty looked up.
"Oh erm Chris I'd like you to meet Andrew & Josh!" The two boys shook Chris' hand nervously & got into a conversation with him about who their favourite wresters were!
"So, what happened with you the other night?" Sasha linked my arm & led me to a seat.
"Oh well y'know!" I smiled.
"Adam?" She raised her eyebrows.
"It was nothing! Just a one off!" I shuffled in my seat slightly embarrassed that I was even admitting it to her!
"Oh so you had fun though?" she grinned.
"Don't! I saw him yesterday & didn't have time to get embarrassed! I'm dreading bumping into him to….."
"EDGE!!!" the boys shouted & I cringed! I literally tried to sink into the seat, I felt so awful, even more so now that Sasha knew & now I had to go through this with her eyes on me!
"Oh well, no time like the present!" Sasha stood up, "Adam! Hi! We met the other night!"
"Sasha right?" he smiled nervously & she nodded. "Hi Bec!"
I looked up & forced a smile, "Hi Adam." I quickly looked away again, I was going to kill Sasha for this & she knew it! She could barely keep the smile from her lips!!
"Adam come & sign this for these 2 future WWE stars!" Chris called over.
"Ah erm ok!" he shuffled his feet & put his hands in his pockets. "I'll um see you later then."
"Yeah." I smiled & my cheeks flushed as he walked away.
"Oh my GOD that was priceless!" Sasha giggled & I put a hand to my forehead.
"You total bitch!" I nudged her & she still laughed. "It's not funny! Man I am so ashamed of myself!"
Sasha looked over to where Adam was standing with his back to us, "Hm…..he's got such a nice ass though!" She laughed, "Come on give me all the details!"
"I couldn't even begin!!"
"Wow it must have been good!" She laughed, "Ok then scale of 1 to 10?"
"Sasha!"
"Aw come on! I need some excitement in my life!"
"Ok! Ok! Erm…..9 and a half!"
Sasha's jaw dropped & she looked back at Adam! "9 and a half & you're not seeing him again? Man you need your bloody head read!"
"Whatever!"
"Jesus girl LOOK at the guy!" Sasha shook her head.
"Yeah and?"
"For God's sake what do you mean and?! He's hot!"
"Yeah well….maybe."
Sasha shook her head again, "Man I don't know what is wrong with you I seriously don't! You scare me!"
"What?" I played innocent.
"Oh forget it! If you can't see THAT.." she gestured towards Adam & I quickly pulled her arm back down.
"He'll see you you idiot!" I hissed at her.
"Get over it!" She rolled her eyes.
Was she right? Well even as I looked at Adam I didn't think so! Sure he was a great looking guy and from what I knew of him he was nice too! But he wasn't for me! Why? That was something I couldn't explain, it was just the way I felt, maybe I did indeed need my head read!? I smiled to myself as I recalled some of that night we spent together. God knows how I was ever going to look him in the eye without picturing him naked on the balcony!
"What are you smirking about?" Sasha nudged me out of my day dream.
"Um nothing really! Listen there's someone I need to see! I won't be long!"
"Ok hun! See you later!"
I wandered off in the direction of the locker rooms.
Chapter 64
Next morning when I opened my eyes it was 11am! Jude wasn't in his crib so I figured Jeff had taken him out somewhere. When I'd had a wash & got dressed I went downstairs to find, to my surprise, that it was Gilbert playing with Jude, not Jeff! He was waving a rattle in his face & 'Coochy - Cooing' at him & I had to laugh.
"Hey there cheeky boy!" I kissed the top of Jude's head, "Are you playing with gramps?"
"Yeah he's got old Gramps feeling his age I can tell you!"
"Aw you should have woken me! I can't believe I slept so late!"
"He was ok with the old man! I thought you could do with the rest, believe me if there had been any sign of a dirty diaper I'd have woken you in a flash!" he winked, "But uncle Jeff changed him & fed him before he went to work! Didn't he little fella?" he tickled Jude.
"Jeff's gone already?"
"Yeah! He left your passes & tickets in the drawer over there, he managed to get 5 is that ok?"
"Um yeah, I guess Betty can get hers from Chris! What time do we need to be there?"
"You & your friends can go anytime you're ready!"
"You're not coming?"
"Well someone has to stay here & look after the baby!"
"Oh I can't ask you to do that! I was just gonna take him with me!"
"Don't you worry about us, we've got company coming over tonight to help us out!" he smiled.
"Oh yeah? Let me guess….hmmm can she cook by any chance?"
"Like an angel!" he winked.
"Oh well it aint Mary then!"
"Hey don't let her catch you talking like that!" Gilbert laughed.
"Don't worry I won't! You want a coffee?"
"Yeah please!" he smiled, "You seem to be in better spirits today, so was Jeff! I take it you two made up?"
"Yeah we did!" I smiled.
"Made up as in….."
"No!" I laughed, "We're just friends again that's all!"
"Ah well I'm glad to hear it! The way you two were screaming at each other I thought…….well it doesn't matter what I thought!"
"Well it's all cool so no need to worry!"
"I wasn't worried!" he smiled, "You two will figure it out yourselves in your own time!"
I wrinkled my brow, "Figure what out?"
"You have this strange affect on each other…..this really weird thing!"
"Oh & what's that?" I laughed.
"You make each other as miserable as sin one day & the next you make each other happy again!"
"It's called friendship!"
"It's called marriage!"
"Are you feeling ok Gilbert? Too much of the old moonshine last night or something?" I laughed.
"Ah you mock me now but just you wait! Everything will fall into place from now on in, I have a good feeling about it!" he picked up the newspaper & started to read. I just stood there, completely confused & convinced he'd been sniffing on newsprint or something! Still, He did have a smile on his face for hours & I put that down to Mary! Maybe he took the advice he'd been so keen to give me, it was nice to see him happy that was for sure! It had been a long time coming, for all of us!
Betty arrived with Andrew at around 2pm, closely followed by Sasha with her eldest, Josh. The boys were so hyped up, giggling & running around & it was chaos!
"I think we should go before Gilbert has a heart attack!" Sasha whispered to me after half an hour of mayhem, one spilled juice on the living room carpet & a grazed knee when Andrew tripped up the porch steps!
"Sure!" I smiled, "I'll just go & get the tickets!"
I went into the living room & pulled open the drawer of the dresser. The tickets & passes were there, along with an envelope which just said 'Bec' on the front! I frowned & opened it up. Inside was a piece of paper folded in half with the word 'Sorry' written on one side. It was Jeff's handwriting but I had no clue what it was or why he'd left it! I opened it up, the header on the top of the page read "CHRISTINA ROSSETTI 1930 - 94" & upon further inspection I saw that it was a page that had been torn from a book.
"REMEMBER
Remember me when I am gone away
Gone far away into the silent land
When you can no more hold me by the hand
Nor I half turn to go yet turning stay
Remember me when no more day by day
You tell me of our future that you planned
Only remember me; you understand
It will be too late to councel then or pray
Yet if you should forget me for a while
And afterwards remember do not grieve
For if the darkness & corruption leave
A vestige of the thoughts that I once had
Better by far you should forget & smile
Than that you should remember & be sad."
Tears welled up in my eyes & as I blinked they rolled down my cheeks.
"Hey are those tickets…oh hey hun! What's wrong?" Sasha put her arm around me when she saw I was upset & I sniffed.
"Oh nothing, it's a long story!" I wiped my face, "Just something that Jeff left for me!"
"Are you ok?"
"Yeah! Come on let's get out of here!" I smiled & folded the piece of paper back up & put it into my pocket.
***
Things were buzzing when we got to the arena a little after 3pm that afternoon. Wrestlemania was just a few hours away & everyone was pumped up & ready to go! We walked down to the ring first & sat & watched Kurt going through his paces with a sparring partner, when he was done he came over to say hi & signed the boy's programs that Shannon had managed to steal from somewhere!! I liked Kurt, he was one of the world's nice guys! Friendly & genuine, yep Karen Angle was definitely one lucky woman!
While we were talking to Kurt, Chris came up behind Betty & hoisted her into the air and she screamed!
"Chris you idiot!" She playfully swiped his chest when he put her down & then kissed his lips passionately.
"Ahem!" Sasha cleared her throat then gestured her head towards the two kids when Betty looked up.
"Oh erm Chris I'd like you to meet Andrew & Josh!" The two boys shook Chris' hand nervously & got into a conversation with him about who their favourite wresters were!
"So, what happened with you the other night?" Sasha linked my arm & led me to a seat.
"Oh well y'know!" I smiled.
"Adam?" She raised her eyebrows.
"It was nothing! Just a one off!" I shuffled in my seat slightly embarrassed that I was even admitting it to her!
"Oh so you had fun though?" she grinned.
"Don't! I saw him yesterday & didn't have time to get embarrassed! I'm dreading bumping into him to….."
"EDGE!!!" the boys shouted & I cringed! I literally tried to sink into the seat, I felt so awful, even more so now that Sasha knew & now I had to go through this with her eyes on me!
"Oh well, no time like the present!" Sasha stood up, "Adam! Hi! We met the other night!"
"Sasha right?" he smiled nervously & she nodded. "Hi Bec!"
I looked up & forced a smile, "Hi Adam." I quickly looked away again, I was going to kill Sasha for this & she knew it! She could barely keep the smile from her lips!!
"Adam come & sign this for these 2 future WWE stars!" Chris called over.
"Ah erm ok!" he shuffled his feet & put his hands in his pockets. "I'll um see you later then."
"Yeah." I smiled & my cheeks flushed as he walked away.
"Oh my GOD that was priceless!" Sasha giggled & I put a hand to my forehead.
"You total bitch!" I nudged her & she still laughed. "It's not funny! Man I am so ashamed of myself!"
Sasha looked over to where Adam was standing with his back to us, "Hm…..he's got such a nice ass though!" She laughed, "Come on give me all the details!"
"I couldn't even begin!!"
"Wow it must have been good!" She laughed, "Ok then scale of 1 to 10?"
"Sasha!"
"Aw come on! I need some excitement in my life!"
"Ok! Ok! Erm…..9 and a half!"
Sasha's jaw dropped & she looked back at Adam! "9 and a half & you're not seeing him again? Man you need your bloody head read!"
"Whatever!"
"Jesus girl LOOK at the guy!" Sasha shook her head.
"Yeah and?"
"For God's sake what do you mean and?! He's hot!"
"Yeah well….maybe."
Sasha shook her head again, "Man I don't know what is wrong with you I seriously don't! You scare me!"
"What?" I played innocent.
"Oh forget it! If you can't see THAT.." she gestured towards Adam & I quickly pulled her arm back down.
"He'll see you you idiot!" I hissed at her.
"Get over it!" She rolled her eyes.
Was she right? Well even as I looked at Adam I didn't think so! Sure he was a great looking guy and from what I knew of him he was nice too! But he wasn't for me! Why? That was something I couldn't explain, it was just the way I felt, maybe I did indeed need my head read!? I smiled to myself as I recalled some of that night we spent together. God knows how I was ever going to look him in the eye without picturing him naked on the balcony!
"What are you smirking about?" Sasha nudged me out of my day dream.
"Um nothing really! Listen there's someone I need to see! I won't be long!"
"Ok hun! See you later!"
I wandered off in the direction of the locker rooms.