Lost, confused, Unkind (Sequel To "Freaked")
Chapter 71
I stood in the corridor not really sure of what to do next! Jeff wandered back over with the kids both wearing Hurricane masks & looking very proud of themselves!
"Hey! Where's Sasha gone?"
"Boys sit here for two minutes ok? Don't move!" I sat them on top of a crate & ushered Jeff to one side away from their ear shot! "Sahsa's had to go home….erm…..well she got a phone call…." I explained to Jeff what we'd heard on the phone!
"Oh shit! Man poor Sasha!"
"Yeah I wish she'd let me go with her though!" I bit on my thumbnail. "Oh so is it ok that we have Josh tonight?"
"Sure no worries!" he looked back at the boys, "He can ah sleep in my room!"
"Thanks!" I said & kissed his cheek, totally oblivious to the comment he made (meaning if Josh was in his room then he would have to be in mine!) "I suppose I better go & find Betty, can you watch them?"
"Yeah, don't worry about those two!" He squeezed my hand & walked off in the direction of the boys who were thankfully oblivious to everything & more concerned with inspecting their Hurricane masks!
I found Betty attatched to Chris just outside one of the men's locker rooms.
"BETTY!" She looked up, "I'm sorry to interrupt but ah we're heading off home!"
"'scuse me!" Adam squeezed behind me on his way to the locker room & when I say squeezed I mean I felt EVERYTHING!
"Ooops sorry Adam!" I smiled & stepped out of his way, blushing slightly! He smiled & winked as he went through the door & Chris smirked. "Very funny Christopher!" I pulled a face at him & he held up his hands.
"Did I say a word?"
"Listen Sasha's had a bit of a problem crop up at home so she's left already…………I'll explain on the way come on!" I grabbed her hand & started leading her away from Chris.
"Are you coming or are you going to stand there like a dork all night?" I shouted at Chris.
"Oh I'll come along, if it's ok with you guys?"
Betty smiled from ear to ear & I rolled my eyes, "Come on then! Oh but…" I prodded his chest, "No Copeland wise cracks ok? Not infront of Jeff or he'll start and get pissy & I've got enough to deal with!"
"I promise!" Chris smiled, "He only gets pissy cause he's jealous though!"
Betty snorted at Chris' stupid comment & I glared at him!
***
The kids both fell asleep in the car on the way home so Jeff & Chris carried them up & put them both in Jeff's bed! Josh had asked some questions but I just told him Caitlin had puked so his Mum had to go & see to her! He seemed happy enough with that story thank God! Gilbert drove Mary back to Edbrook & Jeff made us all a coffee.
"Jesus poor Sasha!" Betty said as we all sat around the table, "what a total bastard!"
"Yeah well we don't know the whole story yet but I don't see how there could be any other explaination for what I heard on that phone!"
Betty nodded & took a drink from her cup, "And what a way to find out!"
"Yeah I know!" I sighed, "I'm just gonna go check on Jude! Back in a min!"
I went into my room and stood staring at Jude, I was so tired yet my mind buzzed with a billion things and there was no way I'd be getting into that bed until I heard from Sasha!
"He ok?" Jeff whispered as he peered around the door.
"Yeah!" I smiled, "Sorry your house has been invaded! I hope your Dad isn't too pissed!" I whispered as we made our way out of the bedroom.
"Hey this is your house too!" He put his hands on my hips, "And no he doesn't mind!" he smiled.
"What a night huh?" I put a hand to my forehead.
"Yeah I hope Sasha's ok!"
"Oh it's not just Sasha! Adam had all the tyres slashed on his car!"
"Shit! His new car?" I nodded, "Ouch!" he wrinkled his nose, "And Shannon!"
"What about Shannon?"
"He was injured during his match didn't you know?"
My stomach flipped, "Jesus no! Is he ok? What happened?"
"Well he went up top and some dip shit got past security & pushed him!"
"Oh my God!" I put a hand to my mouth.
"He'll be ok! They took him to the hospital though cause he was out of it!"
"Fucking hell!" I sighed, "Oh and how's your leg?" I looked down.
"Yeah it's just a bit bruised! I got it strapped it'll be fine!"
"Well I'm going to no more Wrestle-frigging-mania's I can tell you!"
Jeff smiled, "Aw it wasn't that bad!" he touched my cheek.
"I guess not, I mean I got offered a job tonight!"
"What?"
I told him all about what Shane had said to me earlier that night & he hugged me. "That's awesome!"
"Yeah I guess! I haven't really decided yet though, I'll call Shane in the morning!"
We started to go down the stairs side by side.
"Hey pops!" Jeff hugged Gilbert at the bottom of the stairs.
"Great show son! Congratulations! I'm proud of you!" Gilbert smiled, "And YOU!" he pointed at me, "You done good with that video!" he hugged me.
"Thanks Gilbert!" I smiled over his shoulder, "I'm so glad you liked it!"
"Well it brought a tear to my eye I can tell you! You should be proud!"
"Oh well the tech guys kinda did the hard work but yeah I guess I am proud of it really!" I smiled & Jeff put his arm around my waist, squeezing me slightly.
"Well I'm off to bed! Not too much noise!" he pointed at Jeff.
"No worries Dad!" Jeff patted his Dad on the back as he made his way up to bed. "Told you not to worry didn't I?" Jeff smiled.
"Yeah I know!"
He turned me around to face him as we stood outside the kitchen door. "Bec? I know now isn't the best time but can we talk?"
"Sure what's wrong?"
"Nothing's wrong it's just…." He touched my cheek, "I love you and I know you haven't been hearing that an awful lot lately but I'm telling you now!"
I smiled, "It's ok! I mean you don't have to…..y'know because of what Matt said and…"
"That's not why I'm telling you!" He moved closer to me, "I'm telling you because I mean it!" he held my face in both of his hands so this time I couldn't turn away as he kissed my lips softly. I closed my eyes & took a deep breath. I felt so afraid because just lately my feelings for him had grown stronger and I didn't know how to handle it! Why was I afraid? Well Adam's tyres had been slashed after I'd heard that whispered word in the corridor, if 'he' knew I had feelings for Jeff…..well I tried not to think about it! Ok so the tyres could have been done by anyone, there was so many people around that arena, but could I truly afford to take that risk? If I convinced myself that the tyres were just a coincidence & let myself fall in love with Jeff & I was wrong? Well it would be too late to reconsider! Yet still I found myself unable to stop him as he pressed his lips against mine for a second time & I felt his arms slide around my back & pull me close to his body.
"We can't do this!" I said breathlessly & pushed on his shoulders. Gently he moved me up against the wall, "Jeff…"
"Don't make me stop Bec!" he kissed me again, this time there was more passion & feeling in that one kiss than I'd ever felt before, even from Matt! My head was spinning as I tried to tell myself this was too dangerous, but there was another voice in my head saying, 'Don't stop! Don't stop! Don't stop!' It was totally different from anything I'd ever experienced, if I wasn't convinced that I was in love with him before, then I certainly was the instant his lips touched mine! I didn't know you could fall head over heels in love with just one kiss, one moment and BANG! Your life changes forever! I would guess that we were outside the door like that for 10 minutes or more, until something inside of me just snapped. All I thought was 'I can't lose him!' and suddenly I turned my head away & gasped for a breath.
"Stop!" I put my hands on his chest & gently pushed on him until he took a step backwards. "We can't do this! Please!"
He looked confused & he looked hurt! "Why Bec? What's the problem?"
"You just……you don't understand! This just can't happen! I won't let it happen Jeff I'm sorry!"
"But…" he put his hand to his head, "Bec you're right ok I don't understand! So explain it to me! You can't just say that & expect me to……to forget the way I feel about you!" he stepped forwards again & touched my arm, his fingers running up & down, giving me goose bumps as he leaned forwards & lightly kissed my neck. His hand found mine & he curled his fingers around it & squeezed it tightly. His lips were hot on my neck & I closed my eyes, bit on my lip & let my tears flow freely. "Forgive me!' I thought to myself, 'I've just signed his death warrant!'
Chapter 71
I stood in the corridor not really sure of what to do next! Jeff wandered back over with the kids both wearing Hurricane masks & looking very proud of themselves!
"Hey! Where's Sasha gone?"
"Boys sit here for two minutes ok? Don't move!" I sat them on top of a crate & ushered Jeff to one side away from their ear shot! "Sahsa's had to go home….erm…..well she got a phone call…." I explained to Jeff what we'd heard on the phone!
"Oh shit! Man poor Sasha!"
"Yeah I wish she'd let me go with her though!" I bit on my thumbnail. "Oh so is it ok that we have Josh tonight?"
"Sure no worries!" he looked back at the boys, "He can ah sleep in my room!"
"Thanks!" I said & kissed his cheek, totally oblivious to the comment he made (meaning if Josh was in his room then he would have to be in mine!) "I suppose I better go & find Betty, can you watch them?"
"Yeah, don't worry about those two!" He squeezed my hand & walked off in the direction of the boys who were thankfully oblivious to everything & more concerned with inspecting their Hurricane masks!
I found Betty attatched to Chris just outside one of the men's locker rooms.
"BETTY!" She looked up, "I'm sorry to interrupt but ah we're heading off home!"
"'scuse me!" Adam squeezed behind me on his way to the locker room & when I say squeezed I mean I felt EVERYTHING!
"Ooops sorry Adam!" I smiled & stepped out of his way, blushing slightly! He smiled & winked as he went through the door & Chris smirked. "Very funny Christopher!" I pulled a face at him & he held up his hands.
"Did I say a word?"
"Listen Sasha's had a bit of a problem crop up at home so she's left already…………I'll explain on the way come on!" I grabbed her hand & started leading her away from Chris.
"Are you coming or are you going to stand there like a dork all night?" I shouted at Chris.
"Oh I'll come along, if it's ok with you guys?"
Betty smiled from ear to ear & I rolled my eyes, "Come on then! Oh but…" I prodded his chest, "No Copeland wise cracks ok? Not infront of Jeff or he'll start and get pissy & I've got enough to deal with!"
"I promise!" Chris smiled, "He only gets pissy cause he's jealous though!"
Betty snorted at Chris' stupid comment & I glared at him!
***
The kids both fell asleep in the car on the way home so Jeff & Chris carried them up & put them both in Jeff's bed! Josh had asked some questions but I just told him Caitlin had puked so his Mum had to go & see to her! He seemed happy enough with that story thank God! Gilbert drove Mary back to Edbrook & Jeff made us all a coffee.
"Jesus poor Sasha!" Betty said as we all sat around the table, "what a total bastard!"
"Yeah well we don't know the whole story yet but I don't see how there could be any other explaination for what I heard on that phone!"
Betty nodded & took a drink from her cup, "And what a way to find out!"
"Yeah I know!" I sighed, "I'm just gonna go check on Jude! Back in a min!"
I went into my room and stood staring at Jude, I was so tired yet my mind buzzed with a billion things and there was no way I'd be getting into that bed until I heard from Sasha!
"He ok?" Jeff whispered as he peered around the door.
"Yeah!" I smiled, "Sorry your house has been invaded! I hope your Dad isn't too pissed!" I whispered as we made our way out of the bedroom.
"Hey this is your house too!" He put his hands on my hips, "And no he doesn't mind!" he smiled.
"What a night huh?" I put a hand to my forehead.
"Yeah I hope Sasha's ok!"
"Oh it's not just Sasha! Adam had all the tyres slashed on his car!"
"Shit! His new car?" I nodded, "Ouch!" he wrinkled his nose, "And Shannon!"
"What about Shannon?"
"He was injured during his match didn't you know?"
My stomach flipped, "Jesus no! Is he ok? What happened?"
"Well he went up top and some dip shit got past security & pushed him!"
"Oh my God!" I put a hand to my mouth.
"He'll be ok! They took him to the hospital though cause he was out of it!"
"Fucking hell!" I sighed, "Oh and how's your leg?" I looked down.
"Yeah it's just a bit bruised! I got it strapped it'll be fine!"
"Well I'm going to no more Wrestle-frigging-mania's I can tell you!"
Jeff smiled, "Aw it wasn't that bad!" he touched my cheek.
"I guess not, I mean I got offered a job tonight!"
"What?"
I told him all about what Shane had said to me earlier that night & he hugged me. "That's awesome!"
"Yeah I guess! I haven't really decided yet though, I'll call Shane in the morning!"
We started to go down the stairs side by side.
"Hey pops!" Jeff hugged Gilbert at the bottom of the stairs.
"Great show son! Congratulations! I'm proud of you!" Gilbert smiled, "And YOU!" he pointed at me, "You done good with that video!" he hugged me.
"Thanks Gilbert!" I smiled over his shoulder, "I'm so glad you liked it!"
"Well it brought a tear to my eye I can tell you! You should be proud!"
"Oh well the tech guys kinda did the hard work but yeah I guess I am proud of it really!" I smiled & Jeff put his arm around my waist, squeezing me slightly.
"Well I'm off to bed! Not too much noise!" he pointed at Jeff.
"No worries Dad!" Jeff patted his Dad on the back as he made his way up to bed. "Told you not to worry didn't I?" Jeff smiled.
"Yeah I know!"
He turned me around to face him as we stood outside the kitchen door. "Bec? I know now isn't the best time but can we talk?"
"Sure what's wrong?"
"Nothing's wrong it's just…." He touched my cheek, "I love you and I know you haven't been hearing that an awful lot lately but I'm telling you now!"
I smiled, "It's ok! I mean you don't have to…..y'know because of what Matt said and…"
"That's not why I'm telling you!" He moved closer to me, "I'm telling you because I mean it!" he held my face in both of his hands so this time I couldn't turn away as he kissed my lips softly. I closed my eyes & took a deep breath. I felt so afraid because just lately my feelings for him had grown stronger and I didn't know how to handle it! Why was I afraid? Well Adam's tyres had been slashed after I'd heard that whispered word in the corridor, if 'he' knew I had feelings for Jeff…..well I tried not to think about it! Ok so the tyres could have been done by anyone, there was so many people around that arena, but could I truly afford to take that risk? If I convinced myself that the tyres were just a coincidence & let myself fall in love with Jeff & I was wrong? Well it would be too late to reconsider! Yet still I found myself unable to stop him as he pressed his lips against mine for a second time & I felt his arms slide around my back & pull me close to his body.
"We can't do this!" I said breathlessly & pushed on his shoulders. Gently he moved me up against the wall, "Jeff…"
"Don't make me stop Bec!" he kissed me again, this time there was more passion & feeling in that one kiss than I'd ever felt before, even from Matt! My head was spinning as I tried to tell myself this was too dangerous, but there was another voice in my head saying, 'Don't stop! Don't stop! Don't stop!' It was totally different from anything I'd ever experienced, if I wasn't convinced that I was in love with him before, then I certainly was the instant his lips touched mine! I didn't know you could fall head over heels in love with just one kiss, one moment and BANG! Your life changes forever! I would guess that we were outside the door like that for 10 minutes or more, until something inside of me just snapped. All I thought was 'I can't lose him!' and suddenly I turned my head away & gasped for a breath.
"Stop!" I put my hands on his chest & gently pushed on him until he took a step backwards. "We can't do this! Please!"
He looked confused & he looked hurt! "Why Bec? What's the problem?"
"You just……you don't understand! This just can't happen! I won't let it happen Jeff I'm sorry!"
"But…" he put his hand to his head, "Bec you're right ok I don't understand! So explain it to me! You can't just say that & expect me to……to forget the way I feel about you!" he stepped forwards again & touched my arm, his fingers running up & down, giving me goose bumps as he leaned forwards & lightly kissed my neck. His hand found mine & he curled his fingers around it & squeezed it tightly. His lips were hot on my neck & I closed my eyes, bit on my lip & let my tears flow freely. "Forgive me!' I thought to myself, 'I've just signed his death warrant!'