Lost confused Unkind
Chapter 105
I wiped my face on my sleeve & took deep breaths trying to calm my heart that was racing in my chest. I put my head in my hands, I wasn't really sure what had just happened! Was I going crazy again?
"Bec! Are you ok?" Betty sank to her knees infront of me & lifted my head.
"Yeah I'm fine! I'm sorry!"
"Hey it's ok! What's wrong? You don't look so good!"
"There you are!" Sasha put her arm around me and sat down, "Are you ok?"
I gulped, "Yes I'm fine! I just felt a little woozy in there, it was hot! But I'll be ok honestly!"
Betty & Sasha glanced at each other & then back to me, "Bec I'm sorry! I didn't think!"
"You've got nothing to be sorry about! I swear Betty I just felt a bit sick that's all!"
"Sweetie you can talk to us y'know?" Sasha squeezed me.
"It's nothing!"
"No, it's all this talk of weddings! I just didn't think! I mean you & Matt..."
"It's not that!" I snapped.
"It's ok! It's totally understandable!" Sasha rubbed my arm.
"Is it? Is it really? After all this time I still...." I sighed, "Look I'm fine ok? I just needed some air!"
"Maybe if you just talked about it...."
"Betty I'm always whining on about Matt to you guys ok? Just leave it!"
"Erm no you're not!" Sasha said, "you NEVER talk about Matt!" I bit on my lip, "Bec I'm not gonna get on your case ok? I just think it would be better if you..."
"Oh and what would you know about it?" I said sarcastically & Sasha seemed to feeze.
"I know enough!" She stood up and went back inside & I slapped my hand to my forehead!
"Dammit!" Betty got up & sat beside me, "I didn't mean to..." I sighed, "God the drama queen has ruined the day again!"
"It's ok!" Betty said quietly as we stared off into space.
The door burst open & Sasha stormed out followed by Jeff & Dwayne.
"YOU WANNA KNOW SOMETHING?" She pointed in my face & I stood up trying to say I was sorry but she wouldn't let me. "I THINK IT'S TIME YOU STOPPED FEELING FUCKING SORRY FOR YOURSELF AND GOT ON WITH YOUR LIFE!" She yelled in my face. I saw Dwayne try to take hold of her arm but she shrugged him off.
"Sasha I,......"
"YOU WALK AROUND LIKE YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE IN THE WORLD WITH PROBLEMS WELL NEWS FLASH BEC, YOU'RE NOT!" I stared at her unblinking, "YOU NEED TO GET A FUCKING GRIP!"
"Sasha!" Jeff took a step towards her & she held up her hand to stop him.
"No! I'm not finished! This has to be said! IM SICK OF IT BEC! YOU THINK MATT WOULD WANT YOU MOPING AAROUND FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE?" I bit on my lip & gulped, "GOD BEC! I love you like a sister but this has to stop ok? You're not helping yourself to get out of this rut! I know what it's like & God I know it hurts believe me I've been there! But you have to start living your life! You're bringing everyone else down & I don't know how to help you any more!" I could see she was shaking she was so mad at me! "MATT ISNT HERE ANYMORE ! MATT IS DEAD!"
Without thinking I slapped her face and immediately Jeff grabbed hold of my arms and dwayne put his arm infront of Sasha.
"I never asked for your help! I don't need your help!" I spat at her.
"Guys come on!" Betty said nervously.
"Well you need someone's fucking help Bec I swear to God!" Sasha touched her cheek where I'd hit her & I made a lunge for her, breaking free of jeff's grip & grabbing hold of her hair with both hands as she caught my left shin with her foot.
"FUCK!" Jeff put both of his arms around my waist & spun me around so he was inbetween us while Dwayne grabbed Sasha & lifted her off her feet! I back kicked Jeff right in the nuts & he sank to the ground with both hands on his crotch!
"Fucking bitch!" I yelled & made a dive for Sasha knocking both her & Dwayne onto the ground as I wildly swung my fists hoping by some chance I'd actually hit something! For about a minute we rolled in the dirt kicking shit out of each other! I even managed to kick Dwayne off us twice in the meyhem!
"Guys!" Betty yelled. "GUYS FOR FUCKS SAKE!" She reached down & grabbed Sasha off me, both of them landing on their asses in the dirt. "WHAT THE FUCK? ARE YOU BOTH ON DRUGS!" she screamed. I sat up gasping for air, blood trickling out of my lip, covered in dirt with my hair sticking up in all directions! Sasha looked much the same as me, minus the blood! Betty & Dwayne were now both on their asses in the dirt looking totally bewildered and Jeff, still holding onto his balls was trying to drag himself to his feet by using the wall with his free hand! It was chaos! Sasha & I stared at each other, breathless.
"Ok!" Dwayne scrambled to his feet & dusted off his trousers. He bent down, grabbed my arm & hoisted me to my feet. "INSIDE!" he pushed me towards the door & I pulled my arm free of his grip.
"Fuck off!"
"I said INSIDE! It wasn't a question!" I stared at him, "NOW!" he yelled & I jumped slightly before turning and banging the door open as I went back inside.
Chapter 105
I wiped my face on my sleeve & took deep breaths trying to calm my heart that was racing in my chest. I put my head in my hands, I wasn't really sure what had just happened! Was I going crazy again?
"Bec! Are you ok?" Betty sank to her knees infront of me & lifted my head.
"Yeah I'm fine! I'm sorry!"
"Hey it's ok! What's wrong? You don't look so good!"
"There you are!" Sasha put her arm around me and sat down, "Are you ok?"
I gulped, "Yes I'm fine! I just felt a little woozy in there, it was hot! But I'll be ok honestly!"
Betty & Sasha glanced at each other & then back to me, "Bec I'm sorry! I didn't think!"
"You've got nothing to be sorry about! I swear Betty I just felt a bit sick that's all!"
"Sweetie you can talk to us y'know?" Sasha squeezed me.
"It's nothing!"
"No, it's all this talk of weddings! I just didn't think! I mean you & Matt..."
"It's not that!" I snapped.
"It's ok! It's totally understandable!" Sasha rubbed my arm.
"Is it? Is it really? After all this time I still...." I sighed, "Look I'm fine ok? I just needed some air!"
"Maybe if you just talked about it...."
"Betty I'm always whining on about Matt to you guys ok? Just leave it!"
"Erm no you're not!" Sasha said, "you NEVER talk about Matt!" I bit on my lip, "Bec I'm not gonna get on your case ok? I just think it would be better if you..."
"Oh and what would you know about it?" I said sarcastically & Sasha seemed to feeze.
"I know enough!" She stood up and went back inside & I slapped my hand to my forehead!
"Dammit!" Betty got up & sat beside me, "I didn't mean to..." I sighed, "God the drama queen has ruined the day again!"
"It's ok!" Betty said quietly as we stared off into space.
The door burst open & Sasha stormed out followed by Jeff & Dwayne.
"YOU WANNA KNOW SOMETHING?" She pointed in my face & I stood up trying to say I was sorry but she wouldn't let me. "I THINK IT'S TIME YOU STOPPED FEELING FUCKING SORRY FOR YOURSELF AND GOT ON WITH YOUR LIFE!" She yelled in my face. I saw Dwayne try to take hold of her arm but she shrugged him off.
"Sasha I,......"
"YOU WALK AROUND LIKE YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE IN THE WORLD WITH PROBLEMS WELL NEWS FLASH BEC, YOU'RE NOT!" I stared at her unblinking, "YOU NEED TO GET A FUCKING GRIP!"
"Sasha!" Jeff took a step towards her & she held up her hand to stop him.
"No! I'm not finished! This has to be said! IM SICK OF IT BEC! YOU THINK MATT WOULD WANT YOU MOPING AAROUND FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE?" I bit on my lip & gulped, "GOD BEC! I love you like a sister but this has to stop ok? You're not helping yourself to get out of this rut! I know what it's like & God I know it hurts believe me I've been there! But you have to start living your life! You're bringing everyone else down & I don't know how to help you any more!" I could see she was shaking she was so mad at me! "MATT ISNT HERE ANYMORE ! MATT IS DEAD!"
Without thinking I slapped her face and immediately Jeff grabbed hold of my arms and dwayne put his arm infront of Sasha.
"I never asked for your help! I don't need your help!" I spat at her.
"Guys come on!" Betty said nervously.
"Well you need someone's fucking help Bec I swear to God!" Sasha touched her cheek where I'd hit her & I made a lunge for her, breaking free of jeff's grip & grabbing hold of her hair with both hands as she caught my left shin with her foot.
"FUCK!" Jeff put both of his arms around my waist & spun me around so he was inbetween us while Dwayne grabbed Sasha & lifted her off her feet! I back kicked Jeff right in the nuts & he sank to the ground with both hands on his crotch!
"Fucking bitch!" I yelled & made a dive for Sasha knocking both her & Dwayne onto the ground as I wildly swung my fists hoping by some chance I'd actually hit something! For about a minute we rolled in the dirt kicking shit out of each other! I even managed to kick Dwayne off us twice in the meyhem!
"Guys!" Betty yelled. "GUYS FOR FUCKS SAKE!" She reached down & grabbed Sasha off me, both of them landing on their asses in the dirt. "WHAT THE FUCK? ARE YOU BOTH ON DRUGS!" she screamed. I sat up gasping for air, blood trickling out of my lip, covered in dirt with my hair sticking up in all directions! Sasha looked much the same as me, minus the blood! Betty & Dwayne were now both on their asses in the dirt looking totally bewildered and Jeff, still holding onto his balls was trying to drag himself to his feet by using the wall with his free hand! It was chaos! Sasha & I stared at each other, breathless.
"Ok!" Dwayne scrambled to his feet & dusted off his trousers. He bent down, grabbed my arm & hoisted me to my feet. "INSIDE!" he pushed me towards the door & I pulled my arm free of his grip.
"Fuck off!"
"I said INSIDE! It wasn't a question!" I stared at him, "NOW!" he yelled & I jumped slightly before turning and banging the door open as I went back inside.