Ch 16: Picking up The Pieces
When Constance woke up, she could see that it was still dark outside. The clock next to her bed read 1 a.m. Still groggy, she remembered the scene with Alucard and wondered if it had been a dream. She did not know how she had got into bed, so it must have been. But then, by the light of the lamp that was still on, she saw the box she had been packing. Sitting up, she felt the weight of Alucard's coat slide off of her shoulders. Looking down at it, a sense of shame overcame her as she realized that she had not been dreaming. She had been ready to run from this house, like a coward, just as Alucard had said. She had never run from anything before and the thought that she had been ready to run from this place was unacceptable. As the fog of sleepiness lifted from her mind, she glanced over at the armchair and the memory of Alucard's arms around her flooded over her bringing a feeling of gratitude that struggled with her embarrassment. Alucard had comforted her; something that she would never thought he was capable of. Yet he had allowed her to lay her pain on his shoulders and helped her bear it. She owed him thanks, if nothing else.
Constance rose from bed and made her way to the bathroom. Another wave of disgust at herself came over her as she spied her tear-streaked face in the mirror. She shook her head furiously. She still had more to do and would not waste time wallowing in the past. After she had washed her face and brushed her hair, she left her room with Alucard's coat draped over her arm.
When she reached the basement, she looked around in some confusion. She knew that Ceras and Alucard lived in the basement, but for the life of her she didn't know which rooms they occupied. The sound of footsteps in the hall caught her attention. Not wanting to be discovered lurking in the basement, she hid herself behind a corner that led into another hallway. Daring to peek around the corner, she spied Ceras walking tiredly into her room, all but dragging her Halconnen behind her. Perhaps Alucard was in one of the rooms next to her. After she heard the door to Ceras' room close, she stepped into the hallway and made her way to the door next to it. Putting her ear to the door, she heard nothing. When she did the same at another door further down the hallway, she heard the sound of a violin being played. This must be Alucard's room, unless there are other vampires that I don't know about, she thought. The prospect of facing him after behaving in such a way made her nervous. Would he be angry? Or would he just make fun of her? Taking a deep breath to calm her nerves, she knocked lightly on the door and held her breath. She let it out after a minute passed with no response. She knocked again, a little louder this time. Still nothing. She cautiously placed her hand on the doorknob and twisted. The door was unlocked and opened without a sound. Looking into the room, she saw that the music was indeed coming from a violin, being played by Alucard. He had rid himself of his hat, sunglasses, suit coat and tie and was now clad in only his pants and a white dress shirt.
Alucard was unaware of the doctor's presence as she watched him. His eyes were closed and his hands glided over the strings of the violin. He was really very good, Constance thought. Remembering the purpose of her visit, she knocked again, this time loud enough for him to hear her over the music. He turned to see the doctor standing just inside his door, his coat in her arms and a sheepish look on her face.
"Good evening, doctor," he said as he laid the violin down and smiled at her. "To what do I owe the pleasure of this unexpected visit?"
"I.I didn't mean to intrude," Constance said. "I.I thought you would want your coat back."
Alucard watched the doctor approach him timidly and hold out the coat to him. He could almost feel the doctor's nervousness. "Thank you, doctor," he said as he took the coat from her. As he hung it in it's usual place, he could sense that there was more she wanted to say.
"Was that all you wanted?" he asked in a quiet voice.
"No, I also wanted to apologize to you for behaving that way. I was being a coward, just as you said. I had no right to be angry at you for calling me on it."
Alucard moved so that he was standing directly in front of the doctor. He placed his hand on the side of her face and gently tilted her head up so that he could look at her face. He could see the shame in her eyes, but he also saw something that had been missing when she had been packing. The strength and determination that had always been there before was back again. He was confident that she would not leave now.
"No need to apologize," he said. "I know I was harsh. And you were right as well. I have forgotten what it was like to be human, even though I am a servant to a human." Constance was surprised to see a flash of what looked like regret in the eyes of the vampire. Strange for a creature who prided himself of being superior to both humans and monsters.
Constance smiled. "I've often wondered how you came to be working for Integra."
"It's a long story," Alucard said, his face bearing a faraway expression. He talked for what seemed like hours, telling Constance the stories that only Walter knew about through their service together. It was a story of captivity, torturous experiments and a strange contract between himself and Integra's father. In exchange for his life, he had agreed to protect the daughter of Sir Hellsing and the heir to the Hellsing tradition. Integra's father had been no fool. He knew that his brother wanted the power of the Hellsing organization for his own and would stop at nothing to gain it. He had made the arrangement with the monster that he had spent his life pursuing, knowing that he would not always be there to protect his daughter.
"I'm sorry, Alucard," Constance said when he had finished his tale "I can't imagine what that must have been like. But thank you for telling me." She rose from the bed, which was the only other seat in the room and moved to the chair that Alucard was sitting in. She placed her hand on the side of his face just as he had hers earlier. "And, if I may say so, I don't think you've completely forgotten what its like to be human." With that, she bent to his face and kissed him to one side of his mouth. "Thanks again, I have to go now." She moved to the door and exited without another word, leaving a thunderstruck Alucard sitting in his chair staring at the door.
Truth was, Constance's actions had surprised her as much as they had surprised him. She knew what he was, but that had not stopped her from feeling sympathy for him. For a moment, she had also felt a brief but powerful attraction to the vampire, which disturbed her. Shaking her head to rid herself of her strange thoughts, she left the basement and headed back to her room.
As Constance made her way to her room to unpack the box she had packed, Alucard continued to sit in his room. What the doctor had done was an almost entirely new experience for him as no one had ever willingly shown him affection of any kind for a very long time, either being too afraid of him or too disgusted by what he was. The doctor, however, had always treated him as if he were an ordinary man not counting the incident in the library. As he pondered this unusual occurrence and wondered briefly if it would even be possible for a creature such as the doctor and a creature such as himself to be together, he could feel that it was time for him to sleep. As the lid to his bed closed, he touched the corner of his mouth where Constance had kissed him, smiling as he closed his eyes.
When Constance woke up, she could see that it was still dark outside. The clock next to her bed read 1 a.m. Still groggy, she remembered the scene with Alucard and wondered if it had been a dream. She did not know how she had got into bed, so it must have been. But then, by the light of the lamp that was still on, she saw the box she had been packing. Sitting up, she felt the weight of Alucard's coat slide off of her shoulders. Looking down at it, a sense of shame overcame her as she realized that she had not been dreaming. She had been ready to run from this house, like a coward, just as Alucard had said. She had never run from anything before and the thought that she had been ready to run from this place was unacceptable. As the fog of sleepiness lifted from her mind, she glanced over at the armchair and the memory of Alucard's arms around her flooded over her bringing a feeling of gratitude that struggled with her embarrassment. Alucard had comforted her; something that she would never thought he was capable of. Yet he had allowed her to lay her pain on his shoulders and helped her bear it. She owed him thanks, if nothing else.
Constance rose from bed and made her way to the bathroom. Another wave of disgust at herself came over her as she spied her tear-streaked face in the mirror. She shook her head furiously. She still had more to do and would not waste time wallowing in the past. After she had washed her face and brushed her hair, she left her room with Alucard's coat draped over her arm.
When she reached the basement, she looked around in some confusion. She knew that Ceras and Alucard lived in the basement, but for the life of her she didn't know which rooms they occupied. The sound of footsteps in the hall caught her attention. Not wanting to be discovered lurking in the basement, she hid herself behind a corner that led into another hallway. Daring to peek around the corner, she spied Ceras walking tiredly into her room, all but dragging her Halconnen behind her. Perhaps Alucard was in one of the rooms next to her. After she heard the door to Ceras' room close, she stepped into the hallway and made her way to the door next to it. Putting her ear to the door, she heard nothing. When she did the same at another door further down the hallway, she heard the sound of a violin being played. This must be Alucard's room, unless there are other vampires that I don't know about, she thought. The prospect of facing him after behaving in such a way made her nervous. Would he be angry? Or would he just make fun of her? Taking a deep breath to calm her nerves, she knocked lightly on the door and held her breath. She let it out after a minute passed with no response. She knocked again, a little louder this time. Still nothing. She cautiously placed her hand on the doorknob and twisted. The door was unlocked and opened without a sound. Looking into the room, she saw that the music was indeed coming from a violin, being played by Alucard. He had rid himself of his hat, sunglasses, suit coat and tie and was now clad in only his pants and a white dress shirt.
Alucard was unaware of the doctor's presence as she watched him. His eyes were closed and his hands glided over the strings of the violin. He was really very good, Constance thought. Remembering the purpose of her visit, she knocked again, this time loud enough for him to hear her over the music. He turned to see the doctor standing just inside his door, his coat in her arms and a sheepish look on her face.
"Good evening, doctor," he said as he laid the violin down and smiled at her. "To what do I owe the pleasure of this unexpected visit?"
"I.I didn't mean to intrude," Constance said. "I.I thought you would want your coat back."
Alucard watched the doctor approach him timidly and hold out the coat to him. He could almost feel the doctor's nervousness. "Thank you, doctor," he said as he took the coat from her. As he hung it in it's usual place, he could sense that there was more she wanted to say.
"Was that all you wanted?" he asked in a quiet voice.
"No, I also wanted to apologize to you for behaving that way. I was being a coward, just as you said. I had no right to be angry at you for calling me on it."
Alucard moved so that he was standing directly in front of the doctor. He placed his hand on the side of her face and gently tilted her head up so that he could look at her face. He could see the shame in her eyes, but he also saw something that had been missing when she had been packing. The strength and determination that had always been there before was back again. He was confident that she would not leave now.
"No need to apologize," he said. "I know I was harsh. And you were right as well. I have forgotten what it was like to be human, even though I am a servant to a human." Constance was surprised to see a flash of what looked like regret in the eyes of the vampire. Strange for a creature who prided himself of being superior to both humans and monsters.
Constance smiled. "I've often wondered how you came to be working for Integra."
"It's a long story," Alucard said, his face bearing a faraway expression. He talked for what seemed like hours, telling Constance the stories that only Walter knew about through their service together. It was a story of captivity, torturous experiments and a strange contract between himself and Integra's father. In exchange for his life, he had agreed to protect the daughter of Sir Hellsing and the heir to the Hellsing tradition. Integra's father had been no fool. He knew that his brother wanted the power of the Hellsing organization for his own and would stop at nothing to gain it. He had made the arrangement with the monster that he had spent his life pursuing, knowing that he would not always be there to protect his daughter.
"I'm sorry, Alucard," Constance said when he had finished his tale "I can't imagine what that must have been like. But thank you for telling me." She rose from the bed, which was the only other seat in the room and moved to the chair that Alucard was sitting in. She placed her hand on the side of his face just as he had hers earlier. "And, if I may say so, I don't think you've completely forgotten what its like to be human." With that, she bent to his face and kissed him to one side of his mouth. "Thanks again, I have to go now." She moved to the door and exited without another word, leaving a thunderstruck Alucard sitting in his chair staring at the door.
Truth was, Constance's actions had surprised her as much as they had surprised him. She knew what he was, but that had not stopped her from feeling sympathy for him. For a moment, she had also felt a brief but powerful attraction to the vampire, which disturbed her. Shaking her head to rid herself of her strange thoughts, she left the basement and headed back to her room.
As Constance made her way to her room to unpack the box she had packed, Alucard continued to sit in his room. What the doctor had done was an almost entirely new experience for him as no one had ever willingly shown him affection of any kind for a very long time, either being too afraid of him or too disgusted by what he was. The doctor, however, had always treated him as if he were an ordinary man not counting the incident in the library. As he pondered this unusual occurrence and wondered briefly if it would even be possible for a creature such as the doctor and a creature such as himself to be together, he could feel that it was time for him to sleep. As the lid to his bed closed, he touched the corner of his mouth where Constance had kissed him, smiling as he closed his eyes.