CHAPTER 4.5: His Feelings, Her Affection, My Circumstances…
-POV – Hinata Hyuuga-
After crossing the renowned vast desert of the Wind Country, we finally arrived at the Hidden Village of the Sand due to the Kazekage's personal request to Naruto-kun. While we have covered some serious distance from the Leaf Village, the trip was quite enjoyable with just the two of us. After all, this was the first time that Naruto and I traveled together outside of the Village since his return, and since he was visiting Kazekage-sama as a friend and not as an official entourage. So no there's not much pressure on us on this visit to the Sand.
As we enter the Main Gate of the Sand Village, we were warmly greeted by the onlooking villagers, though most of them were cheering for Naruto-kun, not me. Not that I care that much. Naruto-kun was the Hero of the Shinobi World. Realizing that while watching Naruto's back for so long, I can't help but feel proud of him…
…oh. I no longer am chasing his back. We were now walking side-by-side…
That thought alone made my inner self squeal in happiness. He is my dream, and being able to walk by his side, hand-in-hand, was my life-long goal. We were already nearing 2 years in a relationship as a couple, despite almost a year and a half of it being him on an S-Rank Training Mission.
It can't be helped back then. He needed to train to get stronger and be prepared for possible future threats now that the Shinobi World was encountering powerful beings such as the Otsutsukis.
However, if there was anything right now that was hurting me, was the newly implemented law by the Daimyos. They were now allowing registered male Shinobi of the Five Great Shinobi Nations to marry multiple wives. While they indeed have logical grounds for the implementation of the said law, I believe that those were just mere excuses as it will only end up as a tool for those in higher society to control powerful Shinobi who have fought and survived the recent Shinobi World War, mainly Naruto-kun and Sasuke-kun.
And here I thought that I can finally walk side-by-side with Naruto-kun, with just the two of us. However, due to that law, we may still end up walking side-by-side, but with possibly other women by her side. To make matters worse, I might end up the one being left behind if political marriages began coming to play.
The only saving grace that I can see, for now, is to help Naruto-kun find another girl who will accept and love him as who he is. As much as it pains me, that's the best possible option that we have for now. I know that Naruto-kun himself hated the idea, but we don't have a choice. If things will end up with him going to be married into random nobles for mere political reasons and become a pawn under political sense, then I would rather accept the alternative.
However, Sakura-san already have Sasuke-kun, Ino-san was now with Sai-san, Tenten-san was more-or-less with Lee-kun. I even actually thought of Temari-san due to Kazekage-sama's current invitation, but she was already with Shikamaru-san. That was also aside from the fact that those girls weren't even seeing Naruto-kun as a potential partner in life, rather it was more of a comrade-in-arms relationship.
But still, just imagining one of those girls talking and spending time with Naruto-kun as a potential love interest hurts me. I have not felt this much… jealousy… even during the time that Naruto was trying to flirt with Sakura-san back then. Maybe because the love between me and Naruto-kun at that time was still one-sided, mostly on my end.
But as of now, I hate that part of myself. I don't have any reason to be jealous. The fact that he nearly decided to leave the Village together with me, so our relationship won't be affected by that law was more than enough for me to clear any doubts that were currently clouding my heart.
I shook my head internally. Now is not the time to think about something like that. Naruto-kun was about to meet Kazekage-sama. I need to present myself as the rightful girl for Naruto-kun in front of those people whom he valued the most.
We were welcomed by Kankuro-san and Temari-san right after we entered the gate. It was fun chatting with them while we were on the way towards the Kazekage Tower. Midway towards our destination, Kazekage-sama himself appeared thru some sand-based jutsu and he exchanged pleasantries with Naruto-kun. I already knew that they were good friends. But seeing Naruto-kun having a friend of such standing in other Villages still made me feel happy for him.
We spent our time in the guest room with Kankuro-san and Kazekage-sama. The boys, especially Naruto-kun and Kankuro-san, lively exchanged casual jokes and conversation while Kazekage-sama also talked to them from time to time. I feel like I am just here as an audience, but I don't mind. They were Naruto-kun's close acquaintances. So seeing him having fun while having such light-hearted conversation made it feel fun for me as well.
Then, Temari-san was called by Kazekage-sama, inviting another person outside of our current circle. Kazekage-sama even asked Naruto-kun something about the Lost City of Rouran. While I also do am familiar with it due to history classes during the Academy Days, that still made me wonder what all this was about.
It was then that I realized, might be a woman's instinct or such, that something was about to happen right now that will test the current status of our relationship…no… not just that… but the extent of love and trust between me and Naruto-kun.
Then, a very beautiful girl entered the room. Her silky, red-colored, waist-length hair and royal-ish attire that more or less matched with the color of her hair, her careful gesture, and her sincere yet determined purple-colored eyes made me realize that she is some Queen or sort from some other Nation. And what surprised me that much, was the way she called Naruto-kun by his name.
The way she called his name, and how her eyes expressively reacted as she called him immediately made me realize that she had a very special connection with Naruto-kun, mostly on her part. Naruto might have met her sometime, somewhere, just that I am not familiar with when or how. However, the way Naruto-kun started towards her says so otherwise…
He didn't recognize her… on the surface…
But I can see it in his eyes… that Naruto-kun felt something towards her. But he can't just figure it out. I looked towards him as he tried his best to think, trying to remember her, to the point that he was gripping his head as if trying to uncover whatever memories he might have of her. But to no avail.
His mind betrays his memories. But his feelings for others won't. That's who Naruto is.
I actually don't know how I'd feel in the current situation. In front of me was a very beautiful girl with visible affection for Naruto-kun, my fiancee. Him, on the other hand, was having trouble and doing his best trying to browse his deepest memories just to remember her. It was then that I knew that there was a much deeper connection between the two of them, and even more so on part of the girl. While I don't have any clear information of what the relationship between the two of them have, it was still... painful for me to see Naruto-kun react like that in front of another woman... other than me...
However, as I look at the girls thru her sad, longing eyes, as she looked towards Naruto-kun, all of a sudden, I saw a familiar reflection… a version of my past self in her…
…a version of me who can't be able to do anything but watch the person that I love the most from afar… always doing my best trying to reach that person, only to always fall short due to my own weakness…
Upon seeing Naruto-kun gripping his head with his right hand, I tried to console him by holding his left hand with both my hands as he seemed to have trouble breathing while still trying to remember the girl. The last time I saw him like this was when Neji-niisan died in front of us during the war. So I tried my best to do the same as I did back then; held his hand and ensure him that I'll always be there for him.
It was then that the red-haired girl kneeled in front of us. Her purple eyes met with mine. She apologized to me, her emotions clearly emitting in those earnest eyes, as if akin to a pleading one. She then requested to hold Naruto's hand… even for one last time…
And her expression when she told me that pained me…
…because the very reason why I saw a version of myself in her… was because we're the same…
She also loves Naruto-kun... Just like me…
And the reason why she was crying right now was because she finally understood that she can no longer reach him anymore. Because he already had me by his side. So she doesn't have any other choice but to give up her feelings for him. And all she was asking me right now, was to allow her to hold his hand even for one last time. She's not doing this not for any other reason, she just needed closure to support her broken heart and attempt to move on from here.
If I were in her shoes, I… I don't know if I have enough resolve to do that. I would rather run away, far away, without trying to approach the person that I love. I don't think that I have enough resolve for that closure like this girl intends to do. Because I know that I will break apart. I never loved another person as much as I loved Naruto-kun. So what I have for this person right now, was respect and admiration… because she has the resolve to do something that I don't know if I am capable of…
That's why I gently grabbed her hand, and with the two of us, touched Naruto-kun's still trembling left hand. She was visibly surprised and even asked me why I did that. And all I can say was…
"I know that this is the first time that we have met. However, after I saw your feelings and emotions for Naruto-kun, I can't help but feel that I can easily relate to those feelings that you were keeping this entire time within yourself. You know Naruto as who he is, not as what he is, am I right?"
Even I am surprised that I was able to say such words towards this other girl who have visible affection for my fiancée. But I just can't help it. It wasn't just mere sympathy. It was because I can see the other side of me in her. If Toneri Otsutsuki succeeded in taking me away from Naruto-kun back then, I can see myself having the same broken feelings as her right now.
She continued crying, as if praying with our intertwined hands that were touching her forehead. And in that instance…
I saw a dream… I saw a girl surrounded by puppets trying to kill her. Then, I saw Naruto-kun doing his best trying to protect her. I saw how Naruto talked to her, continuously encouraging her to do what was right, as the Queen of her people. I saw how Naruto-kun slowly changed her, from a self-centered girl into a righteous Queen who will do everything that she can to protect and save her people. And he did so unintentionally. And that was when the girl began to develop some deep feelings for him…
After those memories flashed thru my mind, the former Queen, now whom I finally knew as Queen Sara of Rouran, stood up, and without any other word decided to leave the room. If it was painful for me before, then more so right now after I saw her memories, her true feelings. I tried to stop her, but she didn't even bother to look around, or else her resolve will break down. But I can't just leave her be. She had nowhere to go… and the only solace that she had on this foreign timeline for her, right now, was to be with Naruto's side…
"Sara.", all of a sudden, Naruto-kun spoke.
Queen Sara was visibly stunned… her feet seemed to get stuck on where she currently is.
And as if after completely recollecting himself, he yelled at her, this time with his usual behavior. He yelled at her with all his energy. I don't know why, but this made me smile. Finally, Naruto-kun was finally back to his usual self, and also, was finally able to remember her.
She didn't respond to him. The only thing she did was tackle and hug him tightly. Queen Sara then began crying, burying her face into Naruto-kun's chest.
Naruto-kun was visibly confused. Then, as if afraid of something, he looked towards me. While I do feel a little jealous from seeing another woman hugging my fiancée, this time, I don't mind. If not because of everything that I saw, maybe I had stopped her from hugging my fiancée even before she could reach him. Maybe next time. But not for now. So I simply smiled towards Naruto-kun, telling him that it's fine.
Naruto-kun returned the smile, then replied with a silent 'thank you' to me. He then placed both his hands on Queen Sara's shoulder as if to calm her emotions. With his memories of her finally returned, I can now clearly see that Naruto really treasured her, the same as how he treated his Konoha friends and comrades.
But for Queen Sara, it was this kindness of his' that made her deeply fall in love with him.
Queen Sara of Rouran… a girl who was trapped in our timeline, with her only wish was being able to stay with Naruto-kun…
And then there's me, Naruto-kun's fiancée.
I still hate that law. And I still don't like the thought of sharing Naruto-kun with another woman. I don't like him being forced into a marriage due to political reasons or anything relative to that. But we don't have a choice but to abide by the law as Shinobi under that law… So the only option that we have, was for Naruto to find and marry another woman who will love him as who he is... before the Daimyos got ahold of him for their own personal reasons.
But maybe, just maybe, if its Queen Sara-sama…