A/N: Hello, and for those who already know me, hello again!! ^-^ Okay, so didn't I say I'd write a Bakura/Ryou fic soon? Well, here it is!! It is, actually, also a side-story to Shades of a soul, so if you could please read that other one, I'd be grateful... However, you don't need to actually read that fic to understand this one ^^ Hope you guys like it, so let's begin!
Disclaimer: Ugh, why do people think I own Yu-Gi-Oh!? I DO NOT!! And never will... If I did, would you think Anzu/Tea would still be alive?! NO WAY!! Also, Yami would admit his love for Yugi ^-^ And Bakura would admit his love for Ryou too, even though he's so bad =P
Disclaimer 2: I do not own the song "Even in Death", it belongs to the people from Evanescence... AND THEY ROCK!! ^_^
Warning: This fic contains shounen ai, plus mentions of death/suicide... if it disturbs you, please, do not read. Also, there's major swearing (we're talking 'bout Bakura in here...).
Pairings: Bakura/Ryou, slights bits of Yami/Yugi (in the Epilogue)
Keys: "__" means talking, '__' means thinking, and italic means flashback
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Even in death
By: Lily Maxwell
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~ Give me a reason to believe that you're gone
I see your shadow so I know they're all wrong ~
He walked through the dark cemetery, walking towards a certain gravestone. His eyes were dull and full of pain, wanting it all to end. They said the one he loved was gone, but he refused to believe. Still after 5 months, he refused to believe.
Because the one he loved still talked, touched and kissed him like before, his voice still sweet and calm, his eyes still soft and full of love. For him.
They were all wrong. For Ryou was still with him, Bakura.
~ Moonlight
on the soft brown earth
It leads me to where you lay ~
The moonlight guided him through that darkened land, where so much slept in peace, never wanting to be disturbed anymore. After some time, with the wind blowing his white hair, his sorrowful brown eyes found what they were looking for.
"In the loving memory of
Ryou Kyoushi (A/N: made up, of course)"
He fought back a sob, for he would not cry. He knew he wasn't gone, and that was what really counted.
~ They
took you away from me but now I'm taking you home ~
Anger suddenly filled the body of Bakura, that he even bit his lip, making some blood come out of the little wound, making its way down his chin. The fact that he was almost gone wasn't what angered Bakura, but it was what really caused him to almost leave the white-haired boy.
His parents hated Ryou so much that they killed him. No one knew, but Bakura did. Oh, he did, but he could tell no one. For no one would actually believe him. Why would they? Would they rather believe two examples of great citizens, or would they believe in a boy that had gotten into too much trouble for his own good?
Taking something out of his jacket's pocket, the object shone in the moonlight, and Bakura made some smooth movements with it before he stopped to just stare at it. The knife's blade looked so tainting to Bakura's eyes...
And kneeling in front of Ryou's grave, Bakura let the blade touch deeply into his wrists, letting Bakura be amazed by his own blood. So beautiful, a crimson color that really contrasted with his pale skin.
Bakura knew this was a bad way to die, because
it hurt. It hurt too much.
~ I
will stay forever here with you
My love
The softly spoken words you gave me
Even in death our love goes on ~
They say that when you are dying, your whole life flashes before your eyes. And that was what Bakura really wanted. For each minute, each second of pain, he would remember about his life. He would remember some bad things, but he... would remember him. He would see clearly Ryou.
And he really did.
~~
"C'mon, get up!!" Bakura heard, as he was passing a dark alley. Raising one eyebrow, Bakura glanced at the one who spoke, finding it difficult for someone to be there. And also, the harsh tone got Bakura's attention.
"Please.... stop........." claimed a voice, and Bakura looked at the ground, only to find someone there. A few more instants, and Bakura's mind was finally able to notice that the other boy, that he had heard first, was actually beating up the second boy, on the ground.
The second boy's voice seemed so fragile, and broken... and as the sounds of beatings, flesh meeting flesh, Bakura managed to realize the second boy was a lot weaker and smaller then the first one.
And Bakura could be bad. But he was fair.
"Hey! What the fuck do you think you're doing?!" Bakura hissed, running and kicking the other boy off of the poor boy on the ground.
As the silence followed, with the big, fat and angry boy glaring murderously at Bakura, the only thing that could be heard was the other boy's silent sobs and whimpers. Bakura grit his teeth, realizing that he was really right, the second boy was a lot weaker than the one he was now glaring at.
"Hey, mind your own business, asshole!!" the fat boy cried out, and charged forward, in an attempt to hit Bakura.
With great skill and grace, he easily dodged the big boy's attack, himself preparing for attack. With a few blows here and there, Bakura was the obvious winner, and the other boy ran away, his nose bleeding, his stomach hurting, and his eyes deeply hit.
Turning around with a frown, Bakura managed to see through the darkness the figure lying on the ground, and kneeled beside it.
"Are you okay?" he asked, more in curiosity than with real concern. When he didn't get an answer, he reached out to touch the boy, and almost drifted his hand from his right away. In a second try, he managed to touch the boy's face.
His fingers gently touched the boy's cheek, feeling a surface really smooth and soft. Looking more closely, he managed to see through the few rays of light coming into the alley, that the skin was really as pale as Bakura's, but a lot more... feminine, maybe? But he noted that...
The boy was deadly cold.
Really careful, Bakura lifted the boy in his arms, and was quite amused by how light he seemed to be. Walking out of the alley, and into the low light of early evening, his eyes went wide.
For the boy in his arms looked like an exactly replica of him. Only... cuter...
'I did not just think that. I don't said such things as "cute"...' Bakura thought. But he noticed the boy's face was stained with blood and a whole lot of his clothes as well. Biting his lip, he carefully walked through the streets towards... his house?
There was no one there, and the boy looked pretty much in a bad situation... but he wasn't dead. Bakura could take care of him (because he couldn't just leave him like that, or he would have to deal with his annoying conscience later.. or what was left of it), and then he would go away, and his life would be normal again.
Oh, and he would have the glory of being a hero, and the boy could give him a kiss of gratitude...
'Fuck, Bakura! Stop thinking nonsense!! Why the heck would you want the boy to fucking kiss you?!' he thought angrily.
After a few more blocks, Bakura reached his house. Looking rather old and needing some repairs here and there, he opened the door carefully, still with the boy in his arms, and walked to the Living room.
Placing the boy on the couch, he hurried to the bathroom, where his first aid kit was. Getting it, he quickly made his way to the living room and knelt in front of him, taking care of his injuries.
When he took the boy's shirt off, he was even more impressed than before. The boy's skin was so beautiful... he traced with his fingers imaginary tracks, never getting tired of the soft skin.
With all precautions possible (never knowing he could be so gentle and caring in his whole life), Bakura took care of the boy's wounds and injuries, just knowing he would really want the boy to wake up soon. He wanted to hear his voice, look into his eyes... He felt pretty much attracted to this boy, and what he wanted... he always got.
After cleaning and aiding all of his injuries, Bakura just sat on the floor, watching the boy's peaceful sleeping face. His skin was still rather cold, but after Bakura's touches, and after he took care of his wounds, he seemed a little warmer.
It didn't really take too long for the boy to wake up. About just a few minutes later (maybe because he hurt too much), he groaned and slowly blinked his eyes open, gazing around in total wonder, totally clueless and curious about where he was.
"Hi." The boy heard close to him, and almost jumped, if his wounds didn't hurt so much.
"Who... are you?" the boy asked in a sweet tone, recognizing the voice, but not the face of this taller teen.
"I'm your savior, please worship me." Bakura said jokingly, and the boy blinked.
"You helped me from Kurt?" he asked, and Bakura, assuming he was talking about the fat boy, nodded. "Why?" he asked, tilting his head to the side.
"Shit, I helped you, don't go around asking me why, you should just be grateful I helped!" Bakura said, a bit angry. The truth was he didn't want people to know he was good to weaker people than himself.
"Gomennasai..." the boy said, his eyes slightly wide, a bit taken back. A few more minutes later, he completed. "Arigatou."
Bakura sighed. This cursed boy had way too much of a soft convincing and lovely voice.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever..." Bakura said, before looking into the boy's eyes again. "What's your name?" he asked. The boy blinked, and smiled to him.
"Ryou. My name's Ryou. What's yours?" he asked, and Bakura sighed.
"Bakura." He answered, and the boy, Ryou, bowed his head a little for him.
"Thank you for helping me, Bakura-san." He said, thanking Bakura again. Looking over his body, he looked up at Bakura. "Did you take care of my wounds?" he asked.
"Yeah, right, now you must love me." Bakura said smirking, while Ryou blinked but blushed a little. Getting a little more serious, Bakura frowned. "But you need to see a doctor, you've loosen... quite a lot of blood."
Ryou nodded and tried to stand up, but failed miserably. Before he could reach the floor, however, Bakura grabbed him, and he ended up trapped against Bakura's chest.
Looking up, he found the other one smirking.
"Hello." He said raising one eyebrow, making Ryou blush.
~~
That was the day Bakura met Ryou. He smirked, knowing that the two he hated the most, Ryou's parents, failed on their mission. Ryou didn't go away. Oh no, he was still with Bakura. And he would be with him forever.
~ Some
say I'm crazy for my love, Oh my love
But no bonds can hold me from your side, Oh my love ~
He remembered... when Ryou died. Bakura went through the worst depression ever known. He didn't eat, didn't go to school, didn't move... didn't blink and he didn't even know if he breathed at all...
One day, walking through some path near the park, full of trees, Bakura thought if he had gone mad. Because he saw Ryou. And he smiled to him.
He told, the next day, his best friend Malik about what he saw. Malik just said he was going crazy about Ryou's death, and that he needed to try and forget about him.
But he didn't know that Ryou and Bakura
couldn't be apart.
~ They don't know you can't leave me
They don't hear you singing to me ~
He kept seeing Ryou in that same place, near the park, in a path that leaded to one of his friends' house, always meeting him there. Bakura knew that, even though he wad dead, he couldn't leave him. Because Ryou loved him, and he loved him back.
No one, Bakura realized, would ever understand. Because they didn't know that Bakura and Ryou couldn't be apart, ever. They didn't her Ryou's melodic voice singing Bakura into a daydream about his lost love, but always in Ryou's arms. He could touch him. He could kiss him.
And no one would ever understand them.
~ I
will stay forever here with you
My love
The softly spoken words you gave me
Even in death our love goes on ~
Even now, bleeding to death, he could almost hear Ryou singing to him a lullaby. A lullaby for him, to trick Death and never let them be apart again. The crimson liquid never stopped falling, always reaching the earth beneath him, draining more and more the life out of the teenager.
But it was good, since he couldn't take it anymore. He knew Ryou was dead, but after their encounters stopped 3 months ago he noticed that they wanted to take him away from Bakura for real. And he couldn't let it happen.
Because Death wouldn't stop him from loving.
Of course it wouldn't. Just because some said
he was psycho, insane, and mean... he could love. And the one that was blessed
with such strong and truthful feeling was Ryou. And he wanted to be with him.
~ And
I can't love you, anymore than I do ~
Bakura, slowly and in deep pain, felt as he was loosing consciousness little by little, each mere second seemed like an eternity for one who wished to die once and for all, claiming his right love, and wanting to laugh in the face of Death, who dared to mock him.
Because even now, 5 months after Ryou's death, Bakura couldn't love him any more than he already did.
Closing his eyes, Bakura felt his body slowly
going limp, and his soul wanting to run. Run away and leave the lifeless body
there, by his love's grave, and run towards where he belonged.
~ I will stay forever here with you
My love
The softly spoken words you gave me... ~
Opening his eyes, Bakura looked around to find himself surrounded by trees, the wind wanting to blow him away. But it failed.
Because he could feel nothing.
He was a lost soul waiting for it's final judgement. After all the bad things he had done, would he be spared from eternal punishment, and finally enjoy what they so cruelly took away from him, when it was not the time for it?
Hearing some sounds of footsteps, Bakura widened his eyes in happiness and surprise. Images from previous times of encounters with this one face jolted in his memory, and he smirked.
"You don't have to be so angry about it." He rolled his eyes. Bakura just glared at the piece of paper, while he sighed.
"I tell you, Ryou, this is evil's doing!" Bakura said through gritted teeth, motioning to his paper, where there were lots of Math problems. Ryou giggled.
"Evil doing is stalking one just to get him to stay with you." Ryou smirked, while Bakura frowned playfully, and stuck his tongue out at him. So what if he stalked Ryou? He couldn't get to talk to him often, since they studied in different schools and all...
"I wasn't stalking you! I was just..." Bakura thought. Oh hell, fuck it, he was really stalking the white-haired-shorter teen.
"Thinking about a way to talk to me?" Ryou asked, and Bakura nodded, glad that he thought up an excuse for him. "You don't have much touch, do you?" Grinning, Bakura leaned over him.
"We can see about that." he purred, and Ryou blushed deeply. Bakura smirked. His mission was accomplished.
"I-I... I can help you with that, if you want..." Ryou said difficulty, while Bakura, still grinning, nodded. Ryou took the book out of Bakura's hand and started to read the topic, in hope to get Bakura's attention on Math only.
While he read through the pages, Bakura scanned him with his eyes, and frowned when he saw some blood on Ryou's shirt. Leaning over, he took the book unceremoniously from Ryou's hands, and grabbed his shoulders. Looking into deep dark pools of chocolate orbs, Ryou was startled.
"Take the shirt off. Now." Bakura demanded, and Ryou gulped, while blushing.
"N-nani?" he managed to squeal, and Bakura sighed. With his finger, he pointed to the small bloodstain on the boy's shirt, and Ryou blinked, the blushing finally fading slowly. Sighing (in a fashion like Bakura's), Ryou did what he was told.
Bakura's eyes widened in more surprise, seeing that Ryou had new wounds and scratches, and many more bandages around his skinny body, tainting the heavenly figure that should be never touched... in Bakura's mind.
"Ryou!! Who was the fucking bastard, mother fucker that did that with you?!" Bakura hissed, wanting to dismember the guy right there and now. "I mean, I know you're freakin' thin, looks damn girly and looks fucking weak-"
"Well, thanks a lot, Bakura..." Ryou sighed.
"BUT NO ONE HAVE THE GODDAMNED RIGHT TO TOUCH YOU IN ANY KIND OF FUCKING HARM WAY!!" Bakura managed to continue, ignoring Ryou's comment. The smaller boy's eyes widened, and his mouth hanged open, and he saw Bakura grab his shirt and toss it at him, stand up and head towards the front door.
"Bakura, where are you going?" Ryou asked in a hurry, putting his shirt back on as fast and non-painful possible.
"I'm finding the son of a bitch who dared touching you." Bakura simply said, and Ryou shook his head.
"But you don't know him!" Ryou said in a weak voice, but Bakura simply narrowed his eyes.
"I'm finding him even in hell if it's needed." Bakura said in a threatening low voice, making even Ryou shiver.
When he was halfway exiting the house, Ryou grabbed his arm, and Bakura turned around to glare at him.
"Why do you keep me here?!" he asked.
"Please, Bakura, I don't want you to hurt anyone because of me..." he whispered, and Bakura's eyes got a bit wide.
"What the heck do you mean!? I mean, look at yourself!" he motioned to Ryou's chest. "He just hadn't killed you for God's knows why!!"
"I don't want you doing stupidities because of me." Ryou said, and Bakura stopped. "I've seen... you hitting people before..." Ryou admitted, and Bakura would have smirked at his stalking-admission if the situation didn't involve some bastard's blood, the joy of hitting and some killing pleasures.
"Your point is exactly...?" Bakura raised one eyebrow.
"I don't want you to hit any more people unnecessarily. I don't like the way people talk about you around..." Ryou looked at the floor. Bakura was stunned. Why did Ryou protect the one that had caused him so much pain?
'Oh shit. He's got me now...' Bakura thought. Closing the door behind him, he leaned over and, without any warning, kissing Ryou fully on the lips, well careful about the boy's injuries and all.
Ryou, even though was totally caught out of guard and, since he was pressed against Bakura's chest firmly due to his strong arms and had to kiss him back occasionally, enjoyed the kiss and much as Bakura did. It lasted until both of them could barely breathe properly.
When they got their breath back, Bakura claimed Ryou's mouth once again, and tasted his lips as well as the inside of his mouth, their tongues dancing in a bizarre rhythm, since Bakura was totally drawn by Ryou's sweet taste, scent and touch.
When they parted, Ryou looked slightly amused at Bakura, who just grinned.
"I can't help it. You're just fucking addicting, attractive and irresistible." He licked his lips, sensing the remains of Ryou's soft taste, as the other one just blushed.
He blinked as the image began to faint, and soon it faded to nothingness. He ran towards where he was, but found nothing. His screams, yells, pleas and wishes were totally ignored by whoever wanted him to suffer an eternal pain, loveless.
Into the dark or the night, the figure watched as the other one cried violently, cursing and hitting the ground with his fists, wanting not to be alone. He smiled faintly, knowing that, just as himself still loved him, Bakura loved the one darkened by the trees and unknown shadows.
~ Even in death our love goes on ~
By the time two figures arrived at the Cemetery that night, the body on the ground was already broken, and there was nothing left for them but tears. And almost blood fell from the amethyst and ruby eyes that watched the supreme act of love done by their once mean and cold-hearted friend. Maybe he was kept too much away from love...
~^: O.w.a.r.i. :^~
Iris: THAT WAS FREAKING DEPRESSING!!
Lily: O.o I know, but the song is too...
Iris: I never thought you could write this stuff...
Lily: ^^;; Neither did I... *ahem* Please review and tell me what you thought about it!!
Iris: And if the ending made you cry, please wait... There'll be a happy epilogue for you guys out there not want to kill Lily...
Lily: Yeah ^^;;.... But JUST if you guys review!!!
Bakura: *plotting revenge*
Lily: ^^;;