Chapter 2: As if I'd Leave You

Remy leaned against the wall, looking towards the window distantly, waiting for Professor Xavier to speak.  Rogue and Kitty having left the room moments earlier. 

"Ever since I took you into our ranks as an X-Man, there has been nothing but one dilemma after the next in this mansion," Professor Xavier looked at him, "you have no discipline, you're immature, irresponsible, you put other people at risk, and right now, I understand yes, you are going through a great deal of stress, we ALL are, but you might benefit from taking time out from the team where you won't be such a liability to us."

"A liability?" Remy gaped, "jesus," he rolled away, "you're paranoid."

"Can you blame me?"

Remy looked away again, shoving his hands in his pockets, "fine, so what do you want to do with me?  You wanna send me away?  Kick me out?  Exile me from the X-Men…?"

"Nothing quite so drastic," Professor Xavier assured, "Actually, there is something I would like you to do – it would take you away from the X-Men for several weeks, maybe months, but I feel you would benefit from it…"

"Forget it," Remy said, "I'm doin' no favours to stay in the X-Men, you either kick me out or you don't, but I'm not gonna bust my ass just to make good.  Not for what I did – I shouldn't need to atone for this," Remy headed for the door, his hand on the doorknob.  His thoughts were racing.  Why should he try and atone for what he'd done?  The guy had deserved it after all, hadn't he?

"I will be willing to pay you the rates a Thief of your stature would expect."

Remy stopped, his hand moving from the doorknob, a decent amount of money was something he hadn't had in a while, and after all, it was good to have money for any future plans that might suddenly come up.

"I'm listening," Remy sighed.

Professor Xavier folded his arms on the desk, "In the past six months there have been breaches of security in Muir Island – seven of them.  Five of those breaches resulted in highly successful robberies of expensive chemicals and equipment – we think to manufacture a drug that is being known on the streets as 'MutantX'."

"Where do I come into all of this?" Remy asked curiously.

"We need an someone who can infiltrate almost any security system – so we can find out exactly where the problems are, and try to better them…are you interested?"

Remy had to admit, it sounded interesting, but the thought of being torn away from Rogue right now seemed too much to bear.  "Why…are you dealing with this, why isn't that Moira MacTaggert woman dealing with it herself?  She is the woman in charge, isn't she?"

"As an investor in the Mutant Research Centre, it is also my responsibility to make sure these things are seen to."

"Why me?" He asked, silly question really, he already knew the answer despite himself.

"You're able to break into almost anywhere – you can't deny that."

"Didn't say I was," Remy remarked, "But aren't there security consultants who do this kind for a living?" he leaned back against the wall, tapping his fingers against it – the only thing right now he wanted to do was get out of there and light up a cigarette.

""Why haven't you asked me before now?"

"I intended to – but with Bella Donna resident in the mansion I thought it unwise, I did not think you would want to leave her in the Mansion when you were away – especially since—" Professor Xavier cut himself off abruptly, he realised it was still a painful subject for Remy to speak of.

Remy looked to the floor, as if to ask his feet what the answer to the problem was.

"If you want my advice, Remy, I think that a change of scene, and the opportunity to use your talents where they're sorely needed might do you the world of good – it might help take your mind off of things."

Remy sighed, "But…it means leaving Rogue," he ran his hand through his mussed hair frustrated, he stared into space, "she's going through a lot, I can't just leave her."

"You wouldn't be leaving her, Remy, she's almost seventeen, she's a big girl, it is not like you would be abandoning her in the Antarctic to fend for herself."

Remy drew in a sharp breath, exhaled fiercely, "I know that…but…look, it's just not wise for me to go."

"She has her friends, Kitty, and of course, her brother…"

"Foster Brother," Remy corrected, "And yes, they'd be there for her, but she needs me, you don't understand."

Professor Xavier looked at him, "Remy, I promise you, Rogue will be fine.  And you can return, as soon as the mansion has settled once again."

Remy chewed on the inside of his cheek, "fine…I'll go," he gave in.  "When do you want me to leave."

"In an hour, if possible."

"An hour?!" he demanded, "but…I…" he faltered, thinking of Rogue, but something in him had no further energy to argue, sleep was all he needed, and he could sleep on the jet.  "Fine, I'll go pack."

"Remy, I would rather…you not tell Rogue or any of the others about your true intentions for going to Muir Island."

Remy seemed puzzled, "why?"

"I do not want the students knowing about this drug – there have been rumours but none of them know, and I don't want temptation arising…"

Remy looked at the Professor.

"Especially if Rogue finds out these drugs are still in production.  I'm concerned about her lately, and with you and her as a couple, I feel that she may look towards these drugs as a way to be with you – which maybe dangerous.  Taking these drugs may put her in danger, do you understand?" Professor Xavier asked.

Remy turned away before the professor could see his eyes were tearing up.  Remy pulled himself together and he uttered, "I understand," before he rushed out of the room.

             Rogue stepped into Remy's bedroom, the door was hanging open, and he was fiercely packing clothes into a sports bag in an unorganised and frantic fashion.  He looked tired, still not changed from the clothes from the night before, still unshaven, and still looking as though he had things on his mind. 

             Rogue tapped her knuckles against the threshold.

             Remy turned, glancing at Rogue, she'd showered, her hair was hanging wet, her make up not even applied yet, she was wearing black ripped jeans and a dark green hooded top.  She looked as exhausted as he himself felt.

Rogue stepped in, "what's goin' on?"

             "I gotta go," He muttered, turning back to packing, stuffing a pair of jeans into the bag, "in about half an hour…"

             "What?  Go?!  Go where?" she demanded, her voice didn't hide the apprehensiveness that had come over her the moment he spoke, "

             "Muir Island…gotta go do some stuff," he crossed the room to reach the dresser, and began searching through a drawer for things he wanted to take.

             Rogue looked at him, "can I come?"

             "No…its not wise," Remy sighed, "I'm just goin' on business – Professor's orders, really," He looked in the mirror, the reflection of her at his back, she looked helpless too now, he wondered how he'd be able to leave her this way.  He tried to ignore his feelings, the guilt that washed over him, it was like abandoning her.

             She moved over to him, looking at him, "are you having second thoughts about us now or something?" she asked concernedly, it was the first thing that sprang to his mind.  It seemed like he was running away from her.

             "No…no, of course not…"

"Then why are you leaving me…"

Remy turned towards her, "cherie… Ma seul amour," he sighed, he took her by the shoulders, and led her to the bed and made her sit, he knelt down before her, "believe me, the last thing I want to do is leave you here – especially after all that's happened," he sighed, he looked up at her, "please believe me, I'll be back and nothing is wrong."

"What are you going to be doing there?" Rogue queried.

"I can't say, its confidential information right now."

"But I'm your girlfriend, surely you can trust me…" Rogue looked at him.

Remy knew he could trust her, but the fact was bringing up the information right now – especially if this drug was involved – might upset her after the rape.  She still hadn't completely recovered from it, he could see it on her face how edgy she was, even though to most people she hid this extremely well.  Even if he chose to tell her the little information about the break-ins at the research centre, she would put two and two together, she was smart, she'd figure out instantly what it was really about.

"I trust you more than anyone on the planet," Remy retorted, "But this is sensitive info."

             Rogue looked away, "how long do you expect to be gone?"

             "A month, maybe more, he was vague…" Remy sighed, "I don't want to go, but I owe it to him – to the X-Men.  Rogue, I've caused a lot of trouble…and, right now, they're gonna be lookin' at me with suspicion, y'know?  Like I really am a murderer…"

             "That guy will live…" Rogue looked at him.

             "Oh c'mon, Rogue," he sighed, he stood up, walking over to the window, placing both hands against the windowsill, a slight anger growing inside of him, "they're all going to hate me – they don't know what the guy did to deserve it, and I can't tell them."

             Rogue remained silent, she picked a playing card up from his carpet, turning it around in her hand idly.

             "If you were one of the others – and didn't know what the guy had done – and I did what I did, wouldn't you look at me suspiciously?" Remy asked, his voice quivering.  He wanted the answer to be no, but he knew deep down it was a yes.  She'd suspected him of crime before, even when it hadn't been his fault.  She'd certainly suspect him again, and maybe she had a right to.  The others did too.  "Tell me the truth," he added, looking at her pleadingly.

             Rogue avoided his gaze, "yes," she answered, "but…I'm not one of the others…" she stood up, "I'm the one who has stood by you through all the shit, the one who almost died for you, the one who's honour you were trying to somehow…restore…"

             "How can I restore what I wasn't even there to defend," he sighed guiltily looking away.

             Rogue gripped his arm tightly, harshly, as if to waken him from a crazy dream back into reality, "it's not your fault."

             Remy sighed, "I have to go, Chere, it's for the best…"

             "Promise me you're comin' back…" Rogue stated, more of a command than a plea.

             He gave a little smile, but it was very feigned, right now, smiling genuinely felt like it would take far too much effort, "As if I'd leave you."

             Rogue smiled a little and moved over to him, sliding her arms around his waist, burying her face in his chest, not even distinctly minding the slight musky odour of perspiration tinged with cologne and the strong smell of tobacco.  He wrapped his arms around her, holding her close.

             For a moment, they stayed that way, then Remy unwillingly broke the embrace, moving away, "I need to finish packing…and you have school."

             Rogue gave a deep sigh, "will you at least call me or write me or something?" she asked.

             "I promise I will," he crossed his heart, he took her hand and kissed the fingertips of her leather gloves, then pressed those fingers against where his own heart beat in his chest, "I promise."