Trying to reconcile my relationship with my best friend shouldn't be hard. This shouldn't be something that I should be nervous about, waiting and throwing pebbles into the creek where he told me to meet him. I've been waiting 5 minutes; where is he? Gordo's never late. Never ever, even when it's a good thing that he is. Late, I mean. I sit down, tucking my legs into myself and putting my head on my knees. Hearing somebody clear their throat makes me look up, and I see Gordo, in front of me and as awkward-cute looking as ever.
"Hi," he says cheerfully.
Taken aback by his cheerful nature, I have no choice to act happy to see him. "Hi, Gordo."
"How have things been?" Nice and polite, not best friend material at all.
"Different… different without my friends." I'm right; 11th grade is different. With Kate and Ethan together, still, they're urging me to get with someone.
"Without your friends? What about Kate, and Megan, and Molly? Ever since you joined cheerleader they've been your friends." Grinning at me from beneath his surfer hair, he has a questioning look about him.
"Gordo! You know I mean without you, you dork." Not really, he's actually been cool since he joined drama club and starred in a play.
"I'm popular and you know it." Oooh, so much for the nonconformist Gordo we used to know.
"Yeah, well, so am I." It's true, really, I am.
Sitting down beside me, he starts to explain. "The drama club is linked to the jazz bands, the theater club, the punks, and the cheerleaders and the jocks. How can you go wrong?" He's right, when you're a cheerleader your friends urge you to get a boyfriend, so I did. Johnny is Ethan's right hand man, so they set us up. He's a football player; strong and hot.
"OK. You win. I'm still down at the bottom of the food chain, cause you have more friends."
He senses my fading good mood, and looks concerned.
Tossing pebbles into the creek, simultaneously we start to skip them.
"I've missed Miranda," I start.
"Me too."
"There's email, but it's not the same."
"Nothing's the same lately. You, me, Kate, Ethan, Matt, our parents... Everybody, everywhere is changing."
"Like a butterfly in a cocoon."
"Like kids, growing up," he suggests.
"Like getting married and then getting divorced," I added.
"Like breaking up with your girlfriend."
"Gordo, what are you not telling me? Who were you going out with?!? Sorry, I've been so absorbed with myself… Tell me!"
"Nina."
"That girl in drama club? And Glee club?" I knew her, kind of. Never saw them together.
"That's the one."
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"cause."
"Fine." I turn my back, mocking upset,
Silence. Plops of a stone in the water, the leaves falling down of the red and yellow maple. Even he's changed. He's not the same Gordo I liked in grade 4, nor the brother figure I looked up to in grade 7. In grade 8 he helped me with everything, and Miranda too. In grade 9, when he tutored me in math, he was different and more business-like. He's always changing, and I guess I am too.
"Why… why did we stop talking? I've completely forgotten." Ah, innocent, naïve Gordo. A part of him that's still the same. He doesn't remember. I do. It was during the summer. Gordo, coming into my room as he usually does without telling me beforehand that he's coming over, and then not knocking. He was panting and red, and it was obvious that he had run over.
Seeing me silent, he speaks again. "It was because of…Jake. Wasn't it." He had come into my room, panting, just to see me, making out with Jake, and he had to stand there waiting while Jake pulled his hand out from my shirt. I looked at him, and he looked at me, and then he left without a word.
"Kind of, Gordo. It was really awkward. Afterwards. You know…." I trailed off, unsure of what to say.
"It's OK. Lizzie," he said, standing up and pulling me to my feet. Pulling me close, hugging me.
"I'm sorry. I missed you," I whisper. And I did; I miss the way we played together in kindergarten.
As if this fits in, he says, "I wrote you a love letter."
"What did it say?"
"That's a mystery… of course."
He's still Gordo; plain and unchanged.