Due to Myao's much appreciated review I have decided to revise this chapter a bit. I didn't mean for Raoul to come out so cruel last time, and in my defense, I want to say that I don't support unnecessary bashing of Raoul so I'm eager to change any OOC actions on the character's parts or any hypocrisy on my own. As a note, I don't revise every time someone doesn't like something I wrote. But in this case, I agree with Myao and upon reflection feel something should be done. I think the Raoul I meant to express didn't come across right, because it wasn't supposed to seem as though Raoul would honestly kill a baby (I don't think he would--in the story he was putting on an act which he was unable to follow through on) or that his intentions in giving away the child were sadistic or criminal. However, I support my main storyline and I'll stick to the same basic idea. I don't think Raoul has much respect for Erik as a human being, he admits to hating him, and, unlike Kay, I think he would have had objections to raising Erik's child, no matter that Christine was the mother. I think he would have seen such a child as an unwanted reminder of a past better forgotten. But that's just my take on him.
White flakes of ash had settled upon the layers of soot; the fire had long since burned out, but he didn't care. He had only started it out of boredom, to watch the flames dance out their short, meaningless life. As soon as the source of fuel has burned out, the fire sputters and dies. That was how he felt. That was how he had felt for the last eight months, resuming life out of habit, remembering to eat every now and then. That was how he felt when there was a knock at the door.
"Go away, Nadir! I really don't care what you have to say." He said without thinking. It took some moments, half listening to the repeated violent blows to the door, before he realized two things. The first was that the person had not gone away. The second was that Nadir never came in by the front door.
Erik leapt from his chair, for one instant filled with adrenaline - they had come for him; the mob had found him! Then he realized that it was really all the same to him. Let them come. This dying of love took much longer than he had reckoned on, and any means of death they thought up for him was bound to be less painful. It was at this point in his musings, that Erik realized there was a voice accompanying the sounds. Indeed, he recognized that voice! It was the little viscount who'd stolen away Christine. Erik had a good mind to kill the insolent twig right then for daring to return. He got so far as opening the door, when he was met with a sight so strange, the cunning insults he had planned fell from his lips. The viscount was standing in the cellars, awkwardly holding a naked, sleeping baby as far from himself as he could.
"De Chagny, you never cease to amaze me. What in the name of heaven are you doing with that child?"
Raoul had to recover from surprise and compose himself before he answered. "I'm getting rid of it," he said with what Erik felt to be a lot of bravado and very little conviction.
"You certainly are." Erik mused agreeably, "But you'd be hard pressed to convince me that you rode the whole stretch to Paris, came all the way down here, and crossed the lake, just to kill a defenseless baby."
"I never said I intended to kill it!"
"Then what did you mean by 'getting rid of it'?"
"I don't want it, but I thought you might." Raoul said vaguely, sounding as though he thought himself very cunning.
"And if I don't?"
"Then...I shall have to do something drastic."
"Pity." Erik proceeded to go back into his house, having forgotten about his anger in his amusement at the viscount's antics and his shock at the revelation of the child's existence. Naturally, it had already occurred to him, what this baby was. He did not suppose that de Chagny would offer another man his is own son, and he doubted that de Chagny would pick random babies up off the road to bother his arch-enemy with. There was only one child in the world that the otherwise gentle and compassionate young man would want to be rid of, and that having occurred to him, there was nothing Erik wanted to do so much as sit down and attempt to recover from what was likely the greatest, most overwhelming shock he had ever experienced. He was convinced Raoul would not harm the child. Raoul was not the type; he lacked the required viciousness and insensitivity. And momentarily satisfied with the child's safety, Erik found himself filled with a strong desire to deny Raoul the satisfaction of seeing his distress and the irresistible temptation to tease him by pretending apathy.
Raoul's confidence was shaken at Erik's seeming disinterest. "This isn't just any baby..." he stated, likely trying to use suspense to build to a climax. It made Erik want to laugh, but he was too shaken.
"Really?" he said with mock surprise, glancing over his shoulder and trying to keep his voice steady, "I thought perhaps you were trying to do the orphanages a favor. Or maybe you were coming here to burden me with my more or less illegitimate son--as I highly doubt much of society would accept my marriage to Christine Daaé as legal--and to offer to save his hide on the condition that I follow some terms you have thrown together which are more than likely outrageous and not worth the potential good that could come out of the fact that I've added another whining brat to the already overpopulated world." Having said that in one breath, and having gained the satisfaction of de Chagny's mouth dropping open, making him look ten times dafter than usual, Erik turned once again towards the door.
"Well...Wait!"
"Yes?"
"You don't even care? I mean, it's your son!" Raoul exclaimed, throwing all subtlety to the wind. He seemed appalled at Erik's cool attitude regarding such a serious issue, and his surprise indicated that he had counted on Erik's cooperation.
"Actually," Erik responded, "I'm surprised and honoured that you apparently think I have a heart. I was under the impression you thought me a soulless monster. However, the worth of your offer is sadly reduced by the fact that the child is dead."
"What?" Raoul frantically gave the baby a once-over, confirming Erik's belief that the viscount would never have harmed the poor thing to begin with. "No it's not!"
"Show me a newborn, other than a dead one, Monsieur, which does not cry when held naked by an incompetent in a freezing cellar."
"Oh, that. Well, we gave it laudanum."
"Oh, that was clever. I assume that by 'we' you mean that you did not undertake this task alone. I presume that also means that whoever helped you was competent enough not to give him an overdose."
"Ummm...yes," muttered Raoul, feeling somewhat idiotic for having betrayed that he had an accomplice.
"Good. However, that does not make up for the fact that the baby is likely to catch its death of cold down here, vulnerable and exposed as it is. I hope you have not been standing here long?" Erik added this last mostly to provoke a reaction from Raoul. He had almost forgotten his alleged role in the whole business.
"N...No!" Raoul moved the child away from the lake and brought it closer to his body for warmth and protection, attempting to hold it with more respect. The only reason Erik did not laugh aloud at the viscount's awkwardness in holding the child, was that Erik, himself, had never held a child either.
"Now, that's much better," Erik said with approval, turning his back once again on the completely flustered and defeated boy on his doorstep.
"Now see here, Erik!" Raoul gave one last attempt at authority. Nothing was going how he imagined it would and he was fed up with Erik's games and at his wit's end, "I won't raise this child! Don't think that I will! Christine and I are trying to create our own life together, far away from the shadows of the past. I want nothing to do with your offspring and I certainly won't give him my name! But I am offering him to you, provided you agree never to bother my wife or myself again. And don't attempt to use that child to persuade Christine to return to you. She is quite aware of its existence and we have agreed that the best course of action is to pronounce it dead. She wants no more to do with it than I, and I expect that the incident shall never be mentioned again. If you won't take him in..." Raoul paused to consider. "I'll have to give him to one of my servants to raise."
The thought of his son catering to the whim of de Chagny and his heirs was too much for Erik; his carefully constructed facade of apathy and disdain crumbled as anger coursed through his veins, cumulating to a painful throb in his chest. Fists clenched, he whirled around and stalked towards Raoul, covering the distance between them in a few long strides. Without waiting for a reaction, Erik snatched the baby from Raoul's arms and clutched it protectively to his chest. He had a good mind to shove the insolent viscount into the lake; it would serve him right for having the audacity to come down to the cellars and confront the former opera ghost is such a fashion! Erik returned to his doorway, trembling with rage, his attempts to get a hold on himself only succeeding with the realization that he was unknowingly crushing the child in his arms.
"His place will never be one of servitude, especially not to a family such as yours," Erik snapped. "Now you'd best be off before I have to dispose of you myself."
"Promise me that you'll never come near Christine or my family again," Raoul insisted.
Erik's expression was stony, but when he spoke, his voice was tired and subdued, "Listen, I want nothing to do with you either. I haven't made any attempts to disrupt your life with Christine thus far, and I don't see why I should begin now. Rather it is you who have violently disrupted my life. Now, I should greatly appreciate it if you would leave."
Raoul couldn't find any appropriate words for the situation, so he merely nodded and backed away. Then, quite suddenly, he turned and hurried off without another word. He seemed quite glad to be rid of the whole affair. For Erik, on the other hand, things were just getting started. He stared with disbelief at the child sleeping peacefully in his arms as the reality of all that had just happened slowly sunk in. A son! Erik felt his knees grow weak and he nearly didn't make it back to the divan before he collapsed. Oh, the baby was all right now, drugged and harmless as it was, but babies change. They grow into children, and eventually into adults! Erik had never been responsible for another person's life before--not in this sense anyway.
Guilt and fear began to bear down on him at the terrible prospect of this child, this thing for which he must care. God! He wanted nothing more than to die in peace, but if he died, the child would have no one to look after it. He couldn't abandon it, but he couldn't very well raise it either. Erik was caught between mirth and terror when he tried to imagine himself as a father, and the more he thought about it, the more terrible and threatening the child became.
Placing the child roughly on the cushions of the divan, Erik sprang up and rushed to the mantel, leaning his pounding head against its cool stonework in an attempt to calm himself and reestablish organized thought in his mind. As he did, something caught his eye; it was the portrait of his mother he kept in a miniature picture frame--the only likeness he had of her in the entire house. It was a faded, wrinkled photograph, taken sometime before she had become hard and worn and mirthless, back when she could remember how to smile, back before Erik was born.
Erik sighed and returned to the divan, his shoulders slumped in weary defeat. He had a duty to care for the child. To abandon it would mean becoming as heartless as his own mother, a nadir he'd hoped never to reach. No, he'd have to do something with the child certainly, and he didn't really fancy having anyone else handle something he'd created; he was naturally possessive and jealous, particularly of his own works of art, among which he supposed he could count this child. But under no circumstances could he do it alone!
If anyone still feels dissatisfied with this or any other chapters, please email me and I'll consider your comments/ideas/criticisms.