MEMORIES
A fanfic by Yomi no Miko


Chapter 17: War
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After the castle invasion, my partnership with Kenzo didn't last long, for obvious reasons. Although I had a feeling that he thought I took advantage of him on that regrettable night, I decided not to think about it anymore. Besides more urgent problems needed my attention.

I left that region of Makai as soon as I could, assuming that the East wasn't a lucky place for me to start a new life at all. However, once more I was totally broke, and all alone, back to the starting point. I had to do something about my life, but had no clue of what to do.

So I wandered around for a couple of days, committing minor thefts to survive. I was consoled by the thought that Kurama wasn't there to witness my precarious situation. I had a name after all. When I was already thinking about trying a more drastic solution to get my life back the way it should be, I met this strange youkai...

I was spending my last silver coins in a crowded tavern, trying to figure out which of the travelers around would be my next target when I heard someone call my name.

"I'm sorry for disturbing you, sir," he said in a very polite way, maybe a little scared since I'd pointed a katana close to his neck.

"What do you want?"

"I'm a servant to Master Ono, the great general of the North. My name is Kim. You're Yomi, the thief, I suppose."

"And if I am?"

"My master is looking for experienced hunters and warriors to join his army. Allow me to explain. Master Ono dominates a large territory in the north. He wishes to become one of the leaders of Makai, a king, like Raizen and the ones that came before him. To achieve that, master Ono needs to start a war against the people that didn't accept him as the sole ruler of the northlands. Once he conquers the north, he'll be able to expand his domain further. I came to the east especially to convince Youko Kurama and his gang to join our group. As I heard the unfortunate new that Kurama's band was dissolved, I started to look for his former members."

"Get lost, little blue one..." I answered. That could only be a joke, I thought.

"Of course you'll be given an important position in our army. And you'll be very well paid as well."

Well, what else can I say... With such a persuasive argument, I found no other way than getting myself a new job... to be a mercenary.

I've already been a soldier at Raizen's army, for only six months. This new experience had absolutely nothing to do with the previous one. This time, the battle was for real. Unlike the stupid expectations about war that I had grown up with, there was no glamour in that thing. Only battles, death, blood, sickness, dirty and useless time, in which all we could do was to wait. Maybe this last part was the worse of all. The north of Makai was a very gelid and harsh region. Many times the weather didn't allow us to go on, and battles remained suspended for months. Sometimes, it seemed completely helpless. As time passed, food resources became so limited that not even half of the youkai had enough to keep them standing up. The leaders said it'd be an endurance war or any other silly term to describe that sort of agony. However after some years, the idea of giving up became weaker in my mind, as my group and I managed to survive winter after winter. I guess we just didn't want to see that all that effort would be in vain.

Twenty years later, I was one of the sub-commanders of the whole army. It was not very hard to get to this position, as a matter of fact, since death and desertion had reduced the soldiers to less than half of its former number. Even Ono himself got to trust me. He was a very strong youkai, but he had chosen the worse place of all to expand his territory. Gods know why that fool had to pick up that particular piece of ice to build his kingdom. And as the years passed, he became aware that his dreams had been just too much for him. I can't say that he didn't try it hard, spending days and nights leaned on maps and plans without rest, but it was useless.

I spent almost a century involved in that absurd conflict. I hoped that if we could only stop that nonsense before we lost it all, there could be a chance to maintain part of the territory and maybe one day, rebuild all that had been lost. But, at the end, we had to surrender, as expected, although I tried all I could to postpone it. At least I was alive, more miserable than the day I left my hometown, but alive.

The journey back was as ruthless as the war itself. The defeated faction was banished and all the exhausted, starved youkai had to go south. Most of them didn't have a chance to reach anywhere.

Another winter caught us in the way. Even now, when I remember that days, I still don't understand how I managed to survive. All I remember was that I went on and on, even after I lost all sense of direction and objective. For some reason, I never gave up. When I reached the warmer lands, I was the only one who had gone that far. I kept walking till I couldn't stand on my feet anymore. One day I woke up lay on the ground. That's when I finally realized I had lost my own war for life, I couldn't go on. That thought almost got a laugh out of me, had I the strength to do so. I decided to wait for death, then.



I opened my eyes. The first thing I saw was a wooden ceiling above me. Weird, I thought. I managed to stand on my forearms. I was in a small room, lay on a bed. It seemed a rustic cabin, like those I found in Nijati. Then I heard steps. Someone entered that room, someone with a familiar pair of black wings.

"So you're awake. For Enma's sake, Yomi, where have you been? Don't you remember me?"

"Kai...zo"

"I'm glad you remembered. I was afraid that you could have lost your mind too. Those things on your brow... they're bigger."

"You? How can it... You're all dead... Where's this place?"

"You're in my house, near the forest where we used to live. When I found you, I though you're dead... if some many years didn't pass, I'd think that... Well, never mind. Where have you been?"

"North... The war."

"Really? Did you walk all the way? Gods..."

It took me some time to recover. Kaizo helped me a lot. I still couldn't understand the reason why he was so nice to me. We're both amazed for meeting each other again after so much time.

Kaizo was still the same, maybe just a little more able-bodied. His dark hair seemed longer too and his expression more mature than it used to be. At the same time, it was kinda weird to realize that he wasn't an adolescent youkai anymore. It also occurred to me that we were the same age.

"Do you have a mirror?" I asked.

"What for?"

"I'd like to see how I look."

Kaizo brought it for me. I was stronger at that time, but still he insisted that I should remain in bed.

"Here."

I confess that I got a little shocked when I saw my reflection in the mirror surface. I looked much older than Kaizo.

"You don't look that bad for someone who almost died," Kaizo said. A very gentle consolation, for someone so pragmatic.

"How did you escape it?"

Kaizo stared at me very seriously.

"I expected you to ask me this question... I won't lie to you... I ran away."

"You ran away... How?"

"Maybe you don't remember but Master Najah had ordered me to stay outside, under that terrible storm to wait for the bastard. That drove me mad... You know I've always hated that youko. Then I looked for a shelter from the rain and found the hollow trunk of an old tree. From there I could see when those barbarians approached the underground entrance. I saw who was guiding them too. There was nothing I could do. Deep inside I knew it was the end and I wished to live for a single chance to have revenge for all he did with my brother, the master, our home, all of us. That's why I ran away. I'm a hunter now. I won't rest till he's dead."

"But... why? He's already dead."

Kaizo looked at me a little confused.

"How long have you been in the north?"

"Almost all this time..."

"So you don't know..."

"Know what?"

He lowered his head, clearly disappointed.

"What is it, Kaizo?" I insisted.

"He 's alive. After the underground destruction he disappeared for five, maybe six years. One day I heard that the village I had just left had been attacked by him. He's got another band now, a professional one, I should say. He's even more feared than in the past. He's more merciless too. People say that he destroyed all the other gangs around and killed their leaders so that he could terrify the whole East alone. Some say he joined that Hame-Kala thing. The entire forest is his territory. It's very dangerous to get in there these days even for former residents like us..."

I guess that I got so astonished that his words became a mess in my mind. I never expected to heard such a story... How could it be?

"I see..." Kaizo whispered "You're still attached to him."

I didn't pay attention to his last remark.

"Are you sure? I mean... he's still..."

"Of course I am."

"I saw him when everything was on fire... He was trapped. How could he have escaped?"

My hands reached the clothes that were next to the bed. I guess that despite of that pitiful conversation, I wasn't really thinking about what I was doing. In my mind, one two words still made sense: Kurama... alive.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"I'm sorry... I can't stay anymore."

"Do you think he still remembers you?"

The question surprised me.

"Of course he does." Only after affirming that so promptly I realized that I was once again living for him.

Kaizo laughed.

"Don't be naive. I doubt he remembers any one of us. He just left it behind as he did with Kuronue. The only improvement time brought him is that he doesn't need to pretend to be nice anymore."

"That's not true. He was nice. He..."

"Oh, com'on Yomi. He betrayed his friend, his father, he destroyed everyone who were unlucky enough to care about him."

"Things didn't work like that. Najah drove him insane till he did what he did. You know it, Kaizo."

"I know exactly what you're talking about, but you're wrong! It was Kurama who drove the master insane, not the opposite. You didn't know master Najah before Kurama appeared. He was wise and generous. He probably was stronger than Raizen but he never used his power to destruction and wars. Life made sense for all of us. But all changed after Kurama started to live in the underground. Master Najah loved him the first time he saw him. It was so obvious for everyone. The youko was no more than a child but he commanded the master the way he wanted. He wasn't innocent. He always had his ability to fascinate people till they can be controlled as puppets."

"That's bullshit! How can you say Najah loved him. That was not love, it was madness."

"And what's love for you? You think love is what you feel for him? If Najah was a madman, you're sick too, Yomi."

"Kaizo, you're wrong. You didn't know him," I argued in a very controlled tone.

"You may go to him, if you want. I know there's nothing I can do to change your mind," he said before leaving the room.

When I left the house, I saw that he was sat on a trunk outside, staring at the forest beyond. For an instant, I felt like a cheat for leaving him like that after all he'd done for me. However, the idea of meeting Kurama again was stronger that anything else.

I came near him.

"Thanks for everything, Kaizo. I'll never forget it, I swear."

"I know you won't. How can you forget someone who gave you such great news..."

I didn't reply. I wasn't cynical enough for that. Kurama had always been alive in my thoughts. And now, it was true... not only a dream. He was alive. That was the happiest surprise of my life, even though I knew that by following him, I'd be throwing away the chance of having a life of my own, a chance to chase the ideals I had cherish along the past century. However, at that point, I didn't care about them anymore.


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Shrine to Yomi-Sama -