Random Orcs, or We Fell to Middle Earth

Chapter Ten: Whirling Skirmishes

by Galadriel Tolkien

My sword was coated in blood by that evening, as I'd cut into both flanks time and again, losing three knives to frisky hillmen. By attrition, I had probably killed over 300. Yet, that was nothing compared to the nearly 10,000 which marched onwards. They had been hampered by the shield for several hours before finally shattering it with a combined rush. The backlash had caught me as I rode to the east, looking for any stragglers on that side.

I fell from the saddle, the magical backlash setting up a reaction headache that nearly blacked me out. With barely a moment's notice, I rolled, retching into the moss at the base of a tree as the echoes rang through my skull like a thousand million jackhammers on First Avenue.

For several minutes I fought the overwhelming sickness back, knowing I couldn't let it win. I had to keep the army busy until the good guys made it to the Deep. Or all was lost in this early hour.

Alayna stayed silent, watching the forest around us, knowing any attempt to help on her part would probably hurt until I got the pain under control. And I was vulnerable like this, unable to function on any but the most basic levels. Finally, I shook myself into some semblance of order, and crawled away from the tree I'd rolled to.

"Don't suppose there's any food in my saddle bags?"

::Did you put any there?:: she asked gently.

"Not sure." I slowly stood, using her as a ladder. "I damned well hope so, or we're going to have to find a source of protein REAL quick."

There was some lembas left, and a few strips of some meat jerky. I wolfed them down, washing my impromptu meal into my stomach with water procured from the streams in Edoras. It wasn't that bad, and I was glad I'd gotten extra water bottles.

My stomach gurgled a slight protest, then settled down. And my head began to feel less painful as my electrolite levels resettled at a normal spot. "Right. Where were we?" I asked as I remounted.

::Running skirmishes.:: She replied, trotting back towards the line of the army. ::But I think we need to check its progress.::

::They're past my barrier, now. What else do we need to know?::

::How many died there? How fast they're going to make up for it?::

::They have to tire sometime, right?::

::Not according to what I got out of Gandalf.::

I blinked. ::Wha?::

::Later.:: She replied shortly.

There was apparently going to be a lot of laters.

In silence, we headed towards the spot I'd set the barrier. The road was empty, the army having passed through quick enough for us to miss them. Not really good, but I could deal. ::Another barrier?::

::You want more backlash? What, are you a masochist?::

::It's either that or they make the Deep on the heels of my friends.::

She sighed and began galloping away from the road so as to come around to the front of the army, ::You'd kill yourself for these people?::

::Have once. Will again, probably.::

::Idiot.::

::Horse.::

An hour, and many insults, later, we were once again in front of the army, though this time, we could see them in the distance, marching hard. I hopped to the ground and held out my arms to either side, deciding on a different barrier, this time. With a shove, I displaced air, creating a barrier thin enough to let arrows through. But thick enough to still only let them through a few at a time.

Then I remounted, strung my bow and waited, arrows ready.

::You're an idiot.::

::It's going to go down quicker, this time.::

::Less pain?::

::Only if I take it down first.::

::Great. So I have to watch the stupid wall.:: She sounded resigned. I smiled.

::Thanks.

::What the hell else am I for?::

::Companionship, friendship, frank discussion of sexual practises from a thousand universes and fifty million galaxies.::

::Softie.::

I chuckled, and raised my bow, knocking an arrow. ::Well, I have to be, with you around.::

::Awww. I feel all warm and squooshy.::

The first orc hit the barrier, and stopped. I waited for more to crowd it, then let loose an arrow, striking the first one. Quickly, the others crowded up to the barrier, shoving at it. Five popped through and I picked them off before killing four more of their comrades behind the barrier.

A cry went up as they spotted me finally, standing in the middle of the road, green horse beneath me, "Green Rider! Bring his head to Saruman!"

::HIS?:: I shot several more, anger colouring my aim, leaving them viciously dead, arrow-shafts protruding from eye-sockets and groins.

"Take him, my lads! There'll be gold and jewels for all!" One of the hillmen cried, rage and fear in his face as I picked off the man standing next to him.

::Another thirty seconds, I think.::

I sent a rash of arrows through the barrier, then dissipated it with a word. Alayna wheeled, and we ran down the road, the army pursuing us angrily.

::I think you pissed them off.::

"Good. Idiots. Calling me a man. We'll show them just how MANLY I am." I sent her to the east, veering back north as we entered the trees. We hit the flank as it ran by, its momentum unable to stop as we scythed in, and my sword rose and fell, cleaving heads and plate armour as Alayna whirled us through the suddenly confused morass.

A pike caught me under the ribs, and I rolled from the saddle, so as not to get caught in its grasp. I came up fighting, throwing a knife into the eye of my nearest attacker, then slashing the legs out from under several others.

For a moment, they seemed to draw back, then they surged forward, sure they could smash me into little bits. I jumped straight up and came down on the back of one, hearing a satisfying crack from the spine I stood upon before turning to catch three blades on my own sword. With a kick into the face of one, a knife into the neck of another, and several slashes back and forth, I flipped over several more suddenly dead opponents, and found myself standing next to Alayna.

With another swipe, I grabbed the pommel and dragged myself upwards, throwing a leg over her back as she took off, mowing down two orcs who didn't move. I caught another in the throat with the pommel of my sword, and then we were clear, riding back into the trees as I fought the rest of the way into the saddle, then hung on grimly as we ran north. Behind us I could hear them pursuing, their rage and anger getting the best of them for now.

It was enough for my purposes. The main mass would be disrupted for a time before they regrouped enough to continue south and west.

::You ok?::

::Will be. Keep going.:: I crouched low, beginning to feel the marks of battle as bruises slowly announced their presence everywhere.

::Sorry about that. I didn't see him coming.::

I smiled in the near-darkness. ::I know, love.::

:Stupid orc.:: She muttered, ::Who gave them the right to have pikes?::

::Saruman.::

::Pansy-ass wizard. Doesn't even fight his own damn battles. If he were really strong, he'd come kick our asses in person.::

I snickered. ::I've met that pansy-ass. And you're right. He is a coward. But Mordor has him under its spell, and the Ring...::

::Calls him to it.::

::As it does most of us.::

We rode in silence for a time, both lost in our own thoughts. Far behind us, the army slowly regrouped and went on, now even angrier to have been diverted for nothing more than the death of several of its own.

Alayna turned us back south and west, and we slowly caught back up with the troops. ::It's been half the day, do you think they made it?::

::I could check.::

::And fall out of the saddle again?::

::Hey, twice in one day is a rarity. Three times ain't happening. You just watch.:: I closed my eyes and focused into the distance, striving for that 'sense' of Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli I had. I was impressed. The troops were further ahead than I'd thought they'd be. From the impressions I was getting, they were nearly to Helm's Deep.

I opened my eyes, and inspected the army that lay close by. ::Think they'll halt for the night?::

::With pansy-ass behind them?::

::No.::

I smiled. ::Time for more fun, then.::

::Ooooh. I love it when you sound silly.::

I was nearly out of arrows, so another frontal assault was out of the question. Besides, they'd be ready for it, and I didn't want to waste energy on a barrier we might not need. Alayna took us north, around the back end, where we picked off several strays before dancing along the right flank, hacking and slashing and ending our run near the middle of the column.

And then she did something I wasn't expecting. Instead of turning back to the north to draw them off, she took us straight out into the road and across the other side. Our speed was so great that nothing hit us, though I did chop about two heads off on the way.

With a cry, several hundred of the hillmen chased us, breaking completely away from the main column. Apparently, we'd finally *really* pissed them off.

She took us south and east, away from Helm's Deep and Saruman's Isengard. We hit plain before too long, and I realised we would be an open target. She did, too, but didn't seem worried. We skirted north, night falling completely and the moonlight illuminating us every so often to the eyes of our pursuers.

They must have had tracking dogs, too, because the few times we tried to shake them off, we found them still behind us. Finally, we resorted to heading back towards the Isen, and I realised about midnight that they had finally stopped following us, heading back towards their own army.

We stopped, then, both of us exhausted. ::Sleep would be good.::

::I know.:: I slid from the saddle and flopped to the road, avoiding a mouthful of dust absently. ::We can't, though.::

::The Deep.::

::Have ta be there.:: I mumbled.

::Y'know, we should've studied some maps of the terrain around here.::

::Oh?:: I dragged myself upright, swaying as fatigue danced across my nerves.

::I'm betting there's a way to get ahead of those damned things again--maybe even an ambush before Helm's Deep.::

Too bad we'd passed burnt-out farms. But there might still be some ahead that were safe. But they'd be emptied. ::Shit.::

::Oh, no. I know what you're thinking, and I'm not gonna do it.::

::We need to know what the land around us looks like.::

::Shapeshifting into a dragon is NOT the way to do that. Use a spell!::

::Too tired.::

::...::

::I know, I know, you hate me.::

::Do I have to go full-dragon?::

::Not if you don't want to. We just need the visual info, even a fly would do.::

::Wait. Got a better idea.::

::Oh?::

::Ride a bat.::

I blinked, pondering the idea. If I could do it, it would take less energy than shapeshifting. And it would actually give me an accurate lay of the land around us. ::I... Hrm.:: Sending my mind into that of a bat was something I hadn't done for a long time. ::I need food, though. Something proteinish, and maybe some greens.::

::Would a rabbit work?::

::Raw?::

::You could fry it with your hex-vision.::

::Don't be silly. Magical fire might attract attention.::

::True. OK. You hop into a bat, I'll go raid a farm for something to eat.::

Delegation at its finest. I moved off the road and settled down at the foot of a tree cross-legged. Closing my eyes, I drifted into a trance, while listening for the tell-tale high-pitched sounds that bats make for navigation and to 'see'.

Hijacking a bat isn't hard, but it takes practice, because bats don't really 'see'. They echo-locate, creating a mini map inside their head that accurately depicts the world around them, down to the little flies in it. I didn't want flies, I needed land mass. But translating that 'image' to what human brains process was sometimes difficult. With time, it gets easier. And I'd had a lot of time.

Sound came from high above, high-pitched chirps that echoed in the sky, and I reached up and lightly touched one of the sound-makers. It was a she, and she seemed content to allow me access to what she saw. I caught impressions of satedness, and realised she had either just eaten or mated. Didn't matter which, she was happy to go on a scouting mission.

We flew into the night, angling south and west, until we came to mountains. Between a high pass, we found what had to be Helm's Deep, surrounded by massive walls of rock, with a small entry-way between the pass opening, and the gates. Around the Dike, there were smaller hills, and I saw ones that would be perfect for what we could do. Well, not SAW. But, 'saw'.

Carefully, I released my hold on the bat queen, and she glided away into the night, cheerful and ready for another meal.

I came to myself, and saw double as I opened my eyes. Two Gandalfs stood above me, both looking equally irritated. I blinked, and they became one, his brows drawn low as he studied me. "Evening, m'love."

"You left yourself open to attack."

"They're all that way." I gestured vaguely to the southwest. "And Alayna's around somewhere." My eyesight was beginning to bleed back into double vision, exhaustion claiming me as I sat there.

::I'm right here. Found some dried venison and smoked yams.::

::Ew. Although the venison sounds good.:: My mouth watered, and I realised it had been a long time since those mouthfuls to stave off backlash shock.

Gandalf glared at Alayna as she shouldered him aside, dropping the pack in her mouth into my lap. I greedily opened it, scrabbling a piece of venison off the haunch and hungrily munching it. After the third strip, I looked up at Gandalf, "Hungry?"

He seemed to have calmed, watching me eat. "Yes."

I held out a strip of meat, and he took it, chewing on it as I took a swig of what should have been water. It wasn't.

::My throat is on fire.::

::Sorry. Thought you'd like something to wake you up.::

Oh, I was awake all right. My mind clear, my taste buds burned away and my throat scalded by the pure grain alcohol I had just gulped down.

Gandalf was staring down at me, worried. "Alcohol?"

I nodded and held the bag up to him. He shook his head and took a sip from the bottle on his belt. "Bloody horse," I rasped.

She snorted.

He knelt next to me and sighed, "I must leave, my dear."

"I'll be fine. I've got a nice spot for an ambush further ahead. I've slowed them enough that our lads reached the Deep a bit before midnight." We stood together and I hugged him. "Again, old man, don't do anything stupid."

Our lips met briefly, then we parted, and I watched him mount Shadowfax with trepidation. This battle wouldn't be the last, but it was the most dangerous. He looked at me one last time, then wheeled the great stallion back to the north and was gone within seconds.

::Love in times of war is so hard.::

"Yes, it is." I swiped at the tears sliding down my cheeks and turned to Alayna. "One last push, dear, and then we'll have companions in battle."

::Oh, good.::

--