Dating for Dummies
Disclaimer: Joss owns the characters, Elizabeth Young owns the plot, and I own Spike. . .the dog. *pout*
Summary: Based on the book, Asking for Trouble written by Elizabeth Young. The personal ad idea was from Must Love Dogs, another book which was written by Claire Cook. Add a scene from "See Jane Date," and mix them together. . .What do you get? "Dating for Dummies." =)
A/N: GUESS WHAT?!?!?!?! AGH!!!! *squealing* GUESS!!! Just because I'm not there to hear your answer, I want to hear your guess anyway. So GUESS! *wait's a beat* Give up? *giggles* My grandmas, BOTH, they're all BETTER! OMG! *wipes tear* They're fine. They're. . .healed. They're not dead. Their cancer didn't spread. *sobs* They're gonna live! Thank you to all those who prayed for me. I know this doesn't seem believable, but really. . .It's a miracle. And I really think you guys had something to do with it. *sniffles* Thank you. I'm so blessed.
Special thanks to the following (in no particular order):
Angel Queen2, Azazel, Lindz, buffsterangelicxws, SlayerGirl1, MySpike (My spirits are always up when I read your uplifting reviews. Thanks. =), JnR 4eva, spree, SlyrPrincess (It *does* help to write. I'm SO sorry to hear about your mom, too. *huggles* Thanks for being willing to talk. *wipes tear*), Spike&Buffy4ever (I am SO sorry to hear about your grandpa! I do hope he's better.), Livia (You were right. Everything was going to be ok. And thanks. I really needed to hear the 'have faith' thing. It helped. And I'm glad your aunt is better. ^_^), Aeneas (OMG! I'm sorry about your family. No one deserves to go through something like that. *huggles* You're such a strong person to keep going. *sniffles*), artemis66, wickedxunique, BrownEyes, SpIkEs AnGeL, SouthernRain, and finally, spike n' oliver's babe. THANK YOU ALL for wishing the best for my family. ~_~, *tear*
& * & * & * & * &
"So what would you like?" Spike asked, dropping his eyes from the nearby restaurants to cast a quick glance at me.
YOU YOU YOU! I'd like you!!! My inner brat demanded.
I bit my lip from saying the words out loud, "Doesn't really matter. I'm just hungry."
Spike's eyes lit up at one of the buildings, "Oh! How about this one?"
I looked in the direction his finger was pointing and recognized it as the same restaurant that I met Lindsey in.
"Uh. . .Sure." I answered unsurely.
He noticed this, "We don't have to eat here if you don't want to."
I shook my head, "No, it's ok."
He gave me a look, "Right. I bet you just don't wanna go in because of our muddy apparel."
I laughed, "Well, yeah. I guess that's part of it. It's just. . ." I looked at our dogs who were trotting happily behind us, "What about them?"
The brunette man shrugged, "We can just tie them to a post or something near the window, that way can keep an eye on them."
"What?! No," I gave him a startled expression, "somebody might kidnap my baby!"
He raised a brow at me, "You're. . .baby?"
"I don't want anyone kidnapping my Spike." I explained.
He grinned, "Didn't know you cared so much about me, luv."
I rolled my eyes at him, "You're so full of yourself."
Spike shook his head, "Actually, I'm a bit peckish, if you ask me."
What the hell did that mean? I wrinkled my nose, "You're disgusting."
He smirked, "It means eating, ducks." He leaned toward me, "But if you have other ideas-"
I put a hand on his chest to stop him, "I was right. You *are* disgusting." My eyes widened, "Did you say 'eating ducks'? Who uses an expression like that?"
Spike sighed and shook his head, "You must be seriously stoned."
I pouted, "Am not. I'm not the one wants to eat ducks."
"Right then. So what do you propose we do?"
I frowned, "Huh? With ducks?"
"With our dogs, luv."
I nodded, "Oh." Shrugging, I grinned and finished, "Bring them in with us, of course." I tugged on Spike's leash and we began heading in the direction of the restaurant.
He looked at me, surprise etched across his features, "You serious?"
I shrugged, "Why not?"
"People will look at us. . ." he warned.
"Stare at us, even," I continued for him.
He continued to look at me, "Don't you care?"
"Should I?" Geez. What was with all the questions?
He shook his head, "You're awfully weird."
I put a hand on my hip, "Should I take that in offence?" I flipped my hair over my shoulder, "Besides, it's unique. Not weird."
He smiled, "Yeah. You're the most unique person I've ever met. I mean, you're willing to go into a fancy restaurant with your dog and your body half covered in mud." He stared at me in awe, "I've never met a woman like you before."
I liked the way he looked at me with the intense gaze and such. It made me feel all beautiful- but then again, after I felt the beauty settling in, I felt the self-consciousness settle in along with it.
God, I hope my lips don't look chapped. How's my hair? I had to resist the urge from checking.
I covered my nervousness with a joke and laugh, "Of course not. I'm one of a kind." He grinned as we continued to walk, "More reason for you to keep a hold of me before some other lucky guy does, 'cause I can guarantee, you won't find anyone else like me-" When I realized what I had just said, my eyes widened, my cheeks reddened, and I began to stutter, "N-not that y-you have to keep hold on t-to me, but it's not like you do. . .oh geez. . ." I bit my lip to keep me from saying anything else.
He laughed.
"Kill me now?" I looked up at him with embarrassment.
He shook his head as he held the door open for me, "No way, luv. You look right cute when you ramble."
& * & * & * & * &
"Isn't this place a little. . .expensive?" I asked, worrying my lip, "I don't want you spending so much on. . .me. The girl who made you roll down a muddy hill, tumble into a lake, and made you fall back down again." I lay my menu down to get a better look at him.
"Some wine, please." he asked the waitress and turned to me, "First off, yes, actually it is. But I wanted to make a good first impression on you. And second, of course. I *do* want to spend money for the girl who made me roll down a muddy hill, tumble into a lake, and made me fall back down again. She's a very nice girl and I'd like to get to know her a lot better."
"Oh, really?" I asked with a smile.
As he was about to reply, a man with a thick mustache came over to our table and cleared his throat in the rudest way possible.
"Excuse me, Sir, Miss."
All four of us looked up at the intrusion.
Spike was the first to speak up, "Yes? May we help you?"
The man folded his hand in front of him, "Sir, as the owner of this restaurant, I must enforce the rules we have here."
"Rules?" I repeated.
He nodded, "Yes, rules. You see, Miss, we have a certain dress code-"
Spike nodded, "Right. The mud thing, isn't it?"
"Yes, Sir, and-"
Woof! Woof!
Spike barked at the man and he jumped up in surprise. He shook his head and straightened out his suit before continuing, "We do not allow pets in this restaurant, either."
Spike nodded and dug into his back pocket. "I think this should handle things. . ." He slipped the man some money and the man smiled.
"Would you like some appetizers before the main dish. . .?"
& * & * & * & * &
Scooping up a hefty portion of vanilla ice cream, I laughed at Spike's story.
"I tell you, she was a bloody irritating chit," he grimaced at the memory.
I giggled, "I bet you have girls trying to get your attention all the time, huh?"
He nodded, "God, yes." He pointed his spoon at me and joked, "Feel privileged to have my company. It's pretty hard to get-"
I dropped my spoon and it clattered against the glass bowl.
Spike frowned and gave me worried look, "Pet, are you alright?" He put a hand over mine and rubbed soothing circles with his thumb. I was so entranced by this small gesture that I had forgotten why I had dropped the spoon in the first place, "What's the matter?"
I shook my head to clear my thoughts, "What about that other girl?"
His brows knit in confusion, "What other girl?"
"You know, the one you had to meet? Oh God, I've wasted your time. I'm sorry-" I began to apologize, but he cut me off.
"Oh, that girl. Don't worry about it," he waved a hand in he air to show his dismissal of the topic, "I know this might sound stupid, but you know that lame column they have for personal ads?"
Oh shit. My throat went dry. "Uh huh. . ." I squeaked.
He nodded, "Well, yeah. I answered to one of them. The poor bird sounded so desperate for a boyfriend. So I felt absolutely bad and thought of taking her out for dinner. . ." His voice faded into the background as my thoughts whirled in my head.
Great. He was the same guy who answered my ad. The British man that I was supposed to meet. Now, here he is, telling me how stupid I was. Whoa, what did he just say?
"Whoa, what did you just say?" I asked, hoping I hadn't heard correctly.
He put a scoop of vanilla in his mouth and swallowed, "I said, 'The chit was bloody stupid to make up a boyfriend, especially for such a long time.' I mean, the girl could've gotten herself a boyfriend during all that time, you know?" He took a sip of his drink, "Some people can be so daft. Did you know she made her 'imaginary' boyfriend a doctor? And now her mom wants to meet him-"
Feeling humiliated and angry, I stood up so fast, the chair toppled backwards. ""Of *course* I know, you ass."
He stopped smiling and he looked at me with confusion, "What?"
I clutched my fists to my sides. "That was me."
"That was- What are you talking about?" He set the spoon down.
"I'm the poor chit desperate for a boyfriend."
The color drained from his face, "Oh God. Pet, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean- "
"Shut up," I ordered, "I don't wanna hear it." My voice began to raise and I gained the attention of the owner.
The man with the thick mustache came jogging over, "Excuse Miss, is there a problem?"
I ignored him and glared at Spike, "You are the most insensitive person I have ever met!"
"I said I was so-"
"I said I don't wanna hear it!" My hand curled into a fist and the owner noticed this.
"M-miss, please d-don't punch the young Sir. We had a m-mighty hard time getting rid of that b-blood stain you made last time," the man stuttered, slowly backing away from me.
I took a calming breath and unclenched my fingers, "I'm not going to hit him."
Spike sank into his chair, "Sure. You're gonna kill me, right?"
I sighed and shook my head at him, "You're not worth the trouble." I crouched down towards our dogs and unhooked the leash from Spike's collar. Turning on my heel, I left the restaurant with head held high.
& * & * & * & * &
A/N: I was GONNA make this a little longer. . .But today, me and my whole family are going out to have dinner with my grandma. Woo hoo! I'm so happy she's ok!
Alright, I have the next chapter ALL figured out, so if you want it. . .Come and get it. *thinks* Wait- no. Leave a REVIEW if you want it. *wink* hehehe ^_^
Please be kind and review. =)
Disclaimer: Joss owns the characters, Elizabeth Young owns the plot, and I own Spike. . .the dog. *pout*
Summary: Based on the book, Asking for Trouble written by Elizabeth Young. The personal ad idea was from Must Love Dogs, another book which was written by Claire Cook. Add a scene from "See Jane Date," and mix them together. . .What do you get? "Dating for Dummies." =)
A/N: GUESS WHAT?!?!?!?! AGH!!!! *squealing* GUESS!!! Just because I'm not there to hear your answer, I want to hear your guess anyway. So GUESS! *wait's a beat* Give up? *giggles* My grandmas, BOTH, they're all BETTER! OMG! *wipes tear* They're fine. They're. . .healed. They're not dead. Their cancer didn't spread. *sobs* They're gonna live! Thank you to all those who prayed for me. I know this doesn't seem believable, but really. . .It's a miracle. And I really think you guys had something to do with it. *sniffles* Thank you. I'm so blessed.
Special thanks to the following (in no particular order):
Angel Queen2, Azazel, Lindz, buffsterangelicxws, SlayerGirl1, MySpike (My spirits are always up when I read your uplifting reviews. Thanks. =), JnR 4eva, spree, SlyrPrincess (It *does* help to write. I'm SO sorry to hear about your mom, too. *huggles* Thanks for being willing to talk. *wipes tear*), Spike&Buffy4ever (I am SO sorry to hear about your grandpa! I do hope he's better.), Livia (You were right. Everything was going to be ok. And thanks. I really needed to hear the 'have faith' thing. It helped. And I'm glad your aunt is better. ^_^), Aeneas (OMG! I'm sorry about your family. No one deserves to go through something like that. *huggles* You're such a strong person to keep going. *sniffles*), artemis66, wickedxunique, BrownEyes, SpIkEs AnGeL, SouthernRain, and finally, spike n' oliver's babe. THANK YOU ALL for wishing the best for my family. ~_~, *tear*
& * & * & * & * &
"So what would you like?" Spike asked, dropping his eyes from the nearby restaurants to cast a quick glance at me.
YOU YOU YOU! I'd like you!!! My inner brat demanded.
I bit my lip from saying the words out loud, "Doesn't really matter. I'm just hungry."
Spike's eyes lit up at one of the buildings, "Oh! How about this one?"
I looked in the direction his finger was pointing and recognized it as the same restaurant that I met Lindsey in.
"Uh. . .Sure." I answered unsurely.
He noticed this, "We don't have to eat here if you don't want to."
I shook my head, "No, it's ok."
He gave me a look, "Right. I bet you just don't wanna go in because of our muddy apparel."
I laughed, "Well, yeah. I guess that's part of it. It's just. . ." I looked at our dogs who were trotting happily behind us, "What about them?"
The brunette man shrugged, "We can just tie them to a post or something near the window, that way can keep an eye on them."
"What?! No," I gave him a startled expression, "somebody might kidnap my baby!"
He raised a brow at me, "You're. . .baby?"
"I don't want anyone kidnapping my Spike." I explained.
He grinned, "Didn't know you cared so much about me, luv."
I rolled my eyes at him, "You're so full of yourself."
Spike shook his head, "Actually, I'm a bit peckish, if you ask me."
What the hell did that mean? I wrinkled my nose, "You're disgusting."
He smirked, "It means eating, ducks." He leaned toward me, "But if you have other ideas-"
I put a hand on his chest to stop him, "I was right. You *are* disgusting." My eyes widened, "Did you say 'eating ducks'? Who uses an expression like that?"
Spike sighed and shook his head, "You must be seriously stoned."
I pouted, "Am not. I'm not the one wants to eat ducks."
"Right then. So what do you propose we do?"
I frowned, "Huh? With ducks?"
"With our dogs, luv."
I nodded, "Oh." Shrugging, I grinned and finished, "Bring them in with us, of course." I tugged on Spike's leash and we began heading in the direction of the restaurant.
He looked at me, surprise etched across his features, "You serious?"
I shrugged, "Why not?"
"People will look at us. . ." he warned.
"Stare at us, even," I continued for him.
He continued to look at me, "Don't you care?"
"Should I?" Geez. What was with all the questions?
He shook his head, "You're awfully weird."
I put a hand on my hip, "Should I take that in offence?" I flipped my hair over my shoulder, "Besides, it's unique. Not weird."
He smiled, "Yeah. You're the most unique person I've ever met. I mean, you're willing to go into a fancy restaurant with your dog and your body half covered in mud." He stared at me in awe, "I've never met a woman like you before."
I liked the way he looked at me with the intense gaze and such. It made me feel all beautiful- but then again, after I felt the beauty settling in, I felt the self-consciousness settle in along with it.
God, I hope my lips don't look chapped. How's my hair? I had to resist the urge from checking.
I covered my nervousness with a joke and laugh, "Of course not. I'm one of a kind." He grinned as we continued to walk, "More reason for you to keep a hold of me before some other lucky guy does, 'cause I can guarantee, you won't find anyone else like me-" When I realized what I had just said, my eyes widened, my cheeks reddened, and I began to stutter, "N-not that y-you have to keep hold on t-to me, but it's not like you do. . .oh geez. . ." I bit my lip to keep me from saying anything else.
He laughed.
"Kill me now?" I looked up at him with embarrassment.
He shook his head as he held the door open for me, "No way, luv. You look right cute when you ramble."
& * & * & * & * &
"Isn't this place a little. . .expensive?" I asked, worrying my lip, "I don't want you spending so much on. . .me. The girl who made you roll down a muddy hill, tumble into a lake, and made you fall back down again." I lay my menu down to get a better look at him.
"Some wine, please." he asked the waitress and turned to me, "First off, yes, actually it is. But I wanted to make a good first impression on you. And second, of course. I *do* want to spend money for the girl who made me roll down a muddy hill, tumble into a lake, and made me fall back down again. She's a very nice girl and I'd like to get to know her a lot better."
"Oh, really?" I asked with a smile.
As he was about to reply, a man with a thick mustache came over to our table and cleared his throat in the rudest way possible.
"Excuse me, Sir, Miss."
All four of us looked up at the intrusion.
Spike was the first to speak up, "Yes? May we help you?"
The man folded his hand in front of him, "Sir, as the owner of this restaurant, I must enforce the rules we have here."
"Rules?" I repeated.
He nodded, "Yes, rules. You see, Miss, we have a certain dress code-"
Spike nodded, "Right. The mud thing, isn't it?"
"Yes, Sir, and-"
Woof! Woof!
Spike barked at the man and he jumped up in surprise. He shook his head and straightened out his suit before continuing, "We do not allow pets in this restaurant, either."
Spike nodded and dug into his back pocket. "I think this should handle things. . ." He slipped the man some money and the man smiled.
"Would you like some appetizers before the main dish. . .?"
& * & * & * & * &
Scooping up a hefty portion of vanilla ice cream, I laughed at Spike's story.
"I tell you, she was a bloody irritating chit," he grimaced at the memory.
I giggled, "I bet you have girls trying to get your attention all the time, huh?"
He nodded, "God, yes." He pointed his spoon at me and joked, "Feel privileged to have my company. It's pretty hard to get-"
I dropped my spoon and it clattered against the glass bowl.
Spike frowned and gave me worried look, "Pet, are you alright?" He put a hand over mine and rubbed soothing circles with his thumb. I was so entranced by this small gesture that I had forgotten why I had dropped the spoon in the first place, "What's the matter?"
I shook my head to clear my thoughts, "What about that other girl?"
His brows knit in confusion, "What other girl?"
"You know, the one you had to meet? Oh God, I've wasted your time. I'm sorry-" I began to apologize, but he cut me off.
"Oh, that girl. Don't worry about it," he waved a hand in he air to show his dismissal of the topic, "I know this might sound stupid, but you know that lame column they have for personal ads?"
Oh shit. My throat went dry. "Uh huh. . ." I squeaked.
He nodded, "Well, yeah. I answered to one of them. The poor bird sounded so desperate for a boyfriend. So I felt absolutely bad and thought of taking her out for dinner. . ." His voice faded into the background as my thoughts whirled in my head.
Great. He was the same guy who answered my ad. The British man that I was supposed to meet. Now, here he is, telling me how stupid I was. Whoa, what did he just say?
"Whoa, what did you just say?" I asked, hoping I hadn't heard correctly.
He put a scoop of vanilla in his mouth and swallowed, "I said, 'The chit was bloody stupid to make up a boyfriend, especially for such a long time.' I mean, the girl could've gotten herself a boyfriend during all that time, you know?" He took a sip of his drink, "Some people can be so daft. Did you know she made her 'imaginary' boyfriend a doctor? And now her mom wants to meet him-"
Feeling humiliated and angry, I stood up so fast, the chair toppled backwards. ""Of *course* I know, you ass."
He stopped smiling and he looked at me with confusion, "What?"
I clutched my fists to my sides. "That was me."
"That was- What are you talking about?" He set the spoon down.
"I'm the poor chit desperate for a boyfriend."
The color drained from his face, "Oh God. Pet, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean- "
"Shut up," I ordered, "I don't wanna hear it." My voice began to raise and I gained the attention of the owner.
The man with the thick mustache came jogging over, "Excuse Miss, is there a problem?"
I ignored him and glared at Spike, "You are the most insensitive person I have ever met!"
"I said I was so-"
"I said I don't wanna hear it!" My hand curled into a fist and the owner noticed this.
"M-miss, please d-don't punch the young Sir. We had a m-mighty hard time getting rid of that b-blood stain you made last time," the man stuttered, slowly backing away from me.
I took a calming breath and unclenched my fingers, "I'm not going to hit him."
Spike sank into his chair, "Sure. You're gonna kill me, right?"
I sighed and shook my head at him, "You're not worth the trouble." I crouched down towards our dogs and unhooked the leash from Spike's collar. Turning on my heel, I left the restaurant with head held high.
& * & * & * & * &
A/N: I was GONNA make this a little longer. . .But today, me and my whole family are going out to have dinner with my grandma. Woo hoo! I'm so happy she's ok!
Alright, I have the next chapter ALL figured out, so if you want it. . .Come and get it. *thinks* Wait- no. Leave a REVIEW if you want it. *wink* hehehe ^_^
Please be kind and review. =)