Buffy climbed into bed next to Spike on their third night aboard the
Enterprise, Spike was already asleep next to her. She watched him as he
slept, sleeping he could look so innocent.
Her thoughts drifted back to what he had told her the morning before. Why couldn't she bring herself to tell him? Did she love him?
He had done so much, he had got a soul, he was suffering for her but he was still a vampire, still Spike. She shouldn't care about a vampire as much as she cared about Spike but she still couldn't bring herself to use the big 'L'. Sighing she turned off the light and lay down next to him and soon joined him in the world of dreams.
*****
Spike awoke with a gasp of unneeded air and sat up in bed. For a second he didn't know where he was, then he remembered. He had had another memory haunting him.
Every time he tried going back to sleep the images presented themselves to him once again: blood, screams and fear.
Suddenly he realised he wasn't going to sleep tonight, getting out of bed Spike dressed quickly, pausing only for a second at the door to look back at the sleeping girl on the bed before slipping silently out. He needed a drink.
Spike sat at the bar and downed his second whisky. Now a girl came and sat beside him and ordered a G&T, "Hey." She said in a bright voice.
He didn't look up. "Evening Sam." "So are you here alone?" Spike just nodded. "I didn't expect to see anyone, it's usually really quiet at this time. I just finished duty. Why are you here?" the sunny brunet went on. "Can't sleep, haunting memories." Spike said still without looking at her. "So you can't sleep because of bad memories?" Spike nodded, "Yeah."
He looked at her now, another member of the ship's crew. She wore her uniform now, which was blue and black and extremely tight.
She sipped her drink and smiled at him, "Did I tell you how much I love that accent! So what do you plan to do tonight?" "Drink myself stupid here then go back to my quarters and pass out."
Sam giggled before she could catch herself. The tone was slightly bitter but he smiled back as he spoke, it sent a shiver through her. She decided to be bold, "Great plan but I can think of something else to take your mind off it." She put he hand on his leg now removing any other explanation.
Spike's eyes went wide. "Um listen, Sam." "Samantha." "Sam I'm not your type, I'm no good for you." "I'll decide what's good for me." She stated firmly.
Bossy little chit he thought. "Listen, ladies don't date the undead, unless they happen to be the Slayer and even then it's touch and go." 'Literally' he added silently to himself.
*****
Buffy suddenly awoke to find she was alone in the now seemingly huge bed.
For some reason it was uncomfortable, she had been left alone. Spike had left her; she had left him in the middle of the night hundreds of times though.
After a while spent trying to find a comfortable position she gave up, she dressed quickly and set out to find him.
Buffy peered into the bar looking for Spike. He usually went drinking after they argued. Yes he was there; he was at the end of a bar with a woman in a blue & black uniform.
Buffy could feel jealousy rising in her but pushed it away, why should she be jealous? It looked perfectly innocent, except for the sneaking off in the middle of the night part. Ok so not making yourself feel better here Buffy
Since she was no longer Slaying or doing anything much she had found herself thinking a lot more, thinking mainly about Spike. She had come to the conclusion that they were both to blame for their situation. It was waited on both sides, they had both basked in heavy denials.
Spike could be rude and inconsiderate and she had used him and then punished him for her shame. Ok Buffy, still not making yourself feel better.
She watched the conversation and the flirty smile the woman kept giving Spike. She couldn't just go in there like this, she hardly had the right. She had told Spike constantly to move on and to leave until he actually did. And it hurt. He had come back but it still hurt.
Why did she have to have these feelings? She couldn't watch any longer, she turned and went back to their quarters and to the embrace of a dreamless slumber.
*****
Buffy sat playing with the straw in her drink. Dawn had taken Spike to see her Holodeck program or something and after wasting nearly an hour in the small living space of their quarters she felt she had to go for a walk somewhere. She was still unsure of what to think about last night. It was annoying in a way, as soon as she had decided she could stand to talk to Spike about 'feelings' he was looking elsewhere.
Part of her wanted to believe it was really just an innocent meeting but another part of her told her not to be so surprised. He's a vampire, if that was so innocent then why did he sneak off in the middle of the night? Good question.
She immediately got up and went out and down the corridor, she had to get out and find some answers.
***** Dawn and Wesley walked ahead of Spike chatting until the reached the door of Holodeck 2.
Dawn pressed a button on the side panel, "Computer; start program 'Dawn' beta 1."
Spike was glad to see her happy at the very least, she was a smart kid. It hadn't taken here long to make a friend either but he had decided to talk with her and Buffy soon about their situation and that it was becoming more and more likely that they would not be returning to Sunny Dale.
***** The Slayer's wanderings took her to a bar now, or what gave the appearance of being a bar. She was about to leave again when she spotted someone moving across the floor. It was the woman Spike had been with last night.
Buffy's eyes followed her as she went to a spot by the window to talk with two other women. One of them she recognised as Dr Crusher.
Beverly smiled at her in Greeting; "Miss Summers wasn't it?" Buffy nodded, "You can use my first name, it feels weird being called 'Summers' by everyone." She decided to go for make 'friends and find out what you can' approach was best. "Buffy this is Alex and Sam then."
Sam turned her head sharply and stared at her, "You're Buffy? You're the Slayer?" she said while pulling her brows together. "Last time I checked." She managed to keep her voice neutral.
Dr Crusher mentioned she had to get back to sick bay and departed leaving her with Alex and the woman who had been with Spike.
Sam ran her middle finger round the rim of her glass, "Spike mentioned you when I first met him. He said you hated him." "I don't hate him." Buffy replied honestly.
"So why aren't you with him? If I were you I'd be all over him right now." Alex asked innocently. "If you knew him you wouldn't say that." Buffy said coolly. "Well I know he's committed homicide but everyone's got a past." Alex answered offhandedly.
Sam nodded, "And from what I could tell he's stopped that now and has been helping you. He's practically every woman's fantasy man."
Buffy shook her head, "He's not a man. He's a vampire. It's just wrong ok."
It took a moment for Sam to realise what the petite blond meant. She said she couldn't love Spike because it was wrong? She remembered reading about something like this in a book of Social History, where people treated another person who was different in some way that they couldn't control and saw them as second rate. 'Racism', that was it.
She didn't want Spike because he wasn't human! Well she better get used to being around non-human species while she was on the ship.
She looked at Buffy; down at Buffy. "Well these days we assess people on who they are not what they are." Sam answered after a calculated pause.
Her thoughts drifted back to what he had told her the morning before. Why couldn't she bring herself to tell him? Did she love him?
He had done so much, he had got a soul, he was suffering for her but he was still a vampire, still Spike. She shouldn't care about a vampire as much as she cared about Spike but she still couldn't bring herself to use the big 'L'. Sighing she turned off the light and lay down next to him and soon joined him in the world of dreams.
*****
Spike awoke with a gasp of unneeded air and sat up in bed. For a second he didn't know where he was, then he remembered. He had had another memory haunting him.
Every time he tried going back to sleep the images presented themselves to him once again: blood, screams and fear.
Suddenly he realised he wasn't going to sleep tonight, getting out of bed Spike dressed quickly, pausing only for a second at the door to look back at the sleeping girl on the bed before slipping silently out. He needed a drink.
Spike sat at the bar and downed his second whisky. Now a girl came and sat beside him and ordered a G&T, "Hey." She said in a bright voice.
He didn't look up. "Evening Sam." "So are you here alone?" Spike just nodded. "I didn't expect to see anyone, it's usually really quiet at this time. I just finished duty. Why are you here?" the sunny brunet went on. "Can't sleep, haunting memories." Spike said still without looking at her. "So you can't sleep because of bad memories?" Spike nodded, "Yeah."
He looked at her now, another member of the ship's crew. She wore her uniform now, which was blue and black and extremely tight.
She sipped her drink and smiled at him, "Did I tell you how much I love that accent! So what do you plan to do tonight?" "Drink myself stupid here then go back to my quarters and pass out."
Sam giggled before she could catch herself. The tone was slightly bitter but he smiled back as he spoke, it sent a shiver through her. She decided to be bold, "Great plan but I can think of something else to take your mind off it." She put he hand on his leg now removing any other explanation.
Spike's eyes went wide. "Um listen, Sam." "Samantha." "Sam I'm not your type, I'm no good for you." "I'll decide what's good for me." She stated firmly.
Bossy little chit he thought. "Listen, ladies don't date the undead, unless they happen to be the Slayer and even then it's touch and go." 'Literally' he added silently to himself.
*****
Buffy suddenly awoke to find she was alone in the now seemingly huge bed.
For some reason it was uncomfortable, she had been left alone. Spike had left her; she had left him in the middle of the night hundreds of times though.
After a while spent trying to find a comfortable position she gave up, she dressed quickly and set out to find him.
Buffy peered into the bar looking for Spike. He usually went drinking after they argued. Yes he was there; he was at the end of a bar with a woman in a blue & black uniform.
Buffy could feel jealousy rising in her but pushed it away, why should she be jealous? It looked perfectly innocent, except for the sneaking off in the middle of the night part. Ok so not making yourself feel better here Buffy
Since she was no longer Slaying or doing anything much she had found herself thinking a lot more, thinking mainly about Spike. She had come to the conclusion that they were both to blame for their situation. It was waited on both sides, they had both basked in heavy denials.
Spike could be rude and inconsiderate and she had used him and then punished him for her shame. Ok Buffy, still not making yourself feel better.
She watched the conversation and the flirty smile the woman kept giving Spike. She couldn't just go in there like this, she hardly had the right. She had told Spike constantly to move on and to leave until he actually did. And it hurt. He had come back but it still hurt.
Why did she have to have these feelings? She couldn't watch any longer, she turned and went back to their quarters and to the embrace of a dreamless slumber.
*****
Buffy sat playing with the straw in her drink. Dawn had taken Spike to see her Holodeck program or something and after wasting nearly an hour in the small living space of their quarters she felt she had to go for a walk somewhere. She was still unsure of what to think about last night. It was annoying in a way, as soon as she had decided she could stand to talk to Spike about 'feelings' he was looking elsewhere.
Part of her wanted to believe it was really just an innocent meeting but another part of her told her not to be so surprised. He's a vampire, if that was so innocent then why did he sneak off in the middle of the night? Good question.
She immediately got up and went out and down the corridor, she had to get out and find some answers.
***** Dawn and Wesley walked ahead of Spike chatting until the reached the door of Holodeck 2.
Dawn pressed a button on the side panel, "Computer; start program 'Dawn' beta 1."
Spike was glad to see her happy at the very least, she was a smart kid. It hadn't taken here long to make a friend either but he had decided to talk with her and Buffy soon about their situation and that it was becoming more and more likely that they would not be returning to Sunny Dale.
***** The Slayer's wanderings took her to a bar now, or what gave the appearance of being a bar. She was about to leave again when she spotted someone moving across the floor. It was the woman Spike had been with last night.
Buffy's eyes followed her as she went to a spot by the window to talk with two other women. One of them she recognised as Dr Crusher.
Beverly smiled at her in Greeting; "Miss Summers wasn't it?" Buffy nodded, "You can use my first name, it feels weird being called 'Summers' by everyone." She decided to go for make 'friends and find out what you can' approach was best. "Buffy this is Alex and Sam then."
Sam turned her head sharply and stared at her, "You're Buffy? You're the Slayer?" she said while pulling her brows together. "Last time I checked." She managed to keep her voice neutral.
Dr Crusher mentioned she had to get back to sick bay and departed leaving her with Alex and the woman who had been with Spike.
Sam ran her middle finger round the rim of her glass, "Spike mentioned you when I first met him. He said you hated him." "I don't hate him." Buffy replied honestly.
"So why aren't you with him? If I were you I'd be all over him right now." Alex asked innocently. "If you knew him you wouldn't say that." Buffy said coolly. "Well I know he's committed homicide but everyone's got a past." Alex answered offhandedly.
Sam nodded, "And from what I could tell he's stopped that now and has been helping you. He's practically every woman's fantasy man."
Buffy shook her head, "He's not a man. He's a vampire. It's just wrong ok."
It took a moment for Sam to realise what the petite blond meant. She said she couldn't love Spike because it was wrong? She remembered reading about something like this in a book of Social History, where people treated another person who was different in some way that they couldn't control and saw them as second rate. 'Racism', that was it.
She didn't want Spike because he wasn't human! Well she better get used to being around non-human species while she was on the ship.
She looked at Buffy; down at Buffy. "Well these days we assess people on who they are not what they are." Sam answered after a calculated pause.