Exchange Rate won Judges Choice at the Shadows & Dust awards!
**********
Chapter 15
Angel thanked The Powers he'd made it out of the house before Codelia caught him. That had certainly been to close a call.
"So, you gonna tell me what that was all about?" Buffy asked. "Not that I blame anyone for wanting to get away from Cordelia, but if you're gonna use me as an excuse..."
"Cordy was about to take me and your body out for a new makeover," Angel explained.
"No way!" Buffy exclaimed. "Although, you do have me looking a little worn around the edges."
"Looks as good as ever to me," Angel smiled. "What's that saying about a gunny sack, or paper bag, or something along those lines? Don't forget that I come from a time when most women weren't really made up a lot."
Buffy squeezed Angel's hand, which she'd conveniently forgotten to let go of after he pulled her out the back door. He didn't seem to mind that little fact though.
"So, you're trying to flatter me by telling me that I look like a peasant girl from a couple hundred years ago?" Buffy teased.
"That's not what I meant and you know it," Angel stated.
"You still have that Angel charm. Kind of disconcerting in my body though," Buffy said with a frown.
"And the California native speak sounds so natural coming from *my* mouth," Angel retorted, but the grin on his face betrayed his mirth.
"Hey, at least it's not some thick Irish brogue. Why don't you speak in a brogue anyway?" Buffy inquired. "I mean, not even a trace of an accent."
"I have an accent," Angel frowned.
"No, you don't. Not even when you're flustered, or angry, or, or, anything," Buffy pointed out. "So when did you loose it?"
"I didn't loose it, so much as, don't use it," Angel replied.
"Ah hah! So you admit that you don't have an accent!" Buffy exclaimed, shaking her finger at Angel.
Angel rolled his eyes, "Alright, I admit it. I worked to get rid of my brogue. I didn't need to stick out once I had my soul. One less thing to draw attention to me. Everyone knew of the vampire with the face of an Angel and a thick Irish brogue. Helpful when you're trying to keep the minions in line. Not so helpful if you're trying to disappear."
"Oh. Well. That makes sense," Buffy responded.
"Can we get on with patroling now?" Angel asked.
"Lead on, oh Slayer of mine," Buffy said, as she extended a hand toward the grave yard they were nearing.
A hand full of fledglings later, Angel was tiring and Buffy was just hitting her stride.
"You know, I could get used to this vampire stuff," Buffy commented off-handedly. "Between the super senses and the strength and speed, it's pretty cool."
"Don't forget the never aging. The never having to work, because you just take what you want," Angel added.
"All potential benefits," Buffy stated.
"Then there's the needing blood and being evil," Angel numerated.
"Well, that part does kind of suck," Buffy said. "But I can see why so many people are drawn to it.
"And of course there's the watching everyone and everything you love die and fall away," Angel pointed out.
"Oh," Buffy quietly replied.
"Yeah, *big* oh," Angel bit out, but then his expression softened. "Buffy, don't fall in love with this. There's so much you will miss if you stay this way." Angel reached up and gently traced the edge of Buffy's cheek. "You were made to be in the light. It's part of who you are. If you stay like this, you'll never be able to walk in the sun. Everything and everyone you hold in your heart will eventually be lost to you. You'll never have a family. No little girls with golden curls. No son with that nose. No one to grow old with. None of it. That's why I left Buffy."
"And none of that really matters," Buffy replied with a sad smile.
Angel urgently replied, "Of course it matters, Buffy. You need and deserve all those things."
"No Angel, what I need is the man I love." Buffy sadly replied. "I don't need or want any of that, if I can't have it with you. If I need the light, it's the light you give me. The only family I need is you. If I am destined to die for my calling, shouldn't I live the life I have with the one who makes me happy? The one who makes my heart and soul cry for joy?"
"Buffy..." Angel started.
"I answered myself those questions a long time ago Angel. I know that everything is different now that I have your body, but it's still all the same. The answers haven't changed. If I had any of that stuff, it still won't make me happy if I didn't have you." Buffy finished.
"I don't know what to say," Angel replied.
"Let me ask you this Angel, now that you have that ability to do and have everything you wanted me to have, does it change anything for you?" Bufy asked.
Angel simply stared at Buffy, dumb-founded that her words were so close to the exact words Spike had used in his question the night before.
After long moments, Angel replied "I don't know. It's not that easy Buffy. It never is."
"It is, if you make it." Buffy stated. After a moment, she slowly leaned down and placed a light kiss on Angel's mouth. A tender, slow kiss that that Buffy poured every last bit of her love into. After a stunned moment, Angel responded to the kiss. Letting his hesitancy and despair finally fall away for just a moment.
Buffy backed up slowly, giving Angel a small, sad smile before turning to head toward her house. Leaving Angel alone to ask himself the same questions she had been so torn over only a few years ago.
**********
Angel slowly paced though the cemetary. Not really paying attention to where he was going or thinking about anything around him. The pesky questions of two stubborn blonds kept nagging at him.
*"Does any of that make you happy?"*
It would be great to be able to have children, but not if they weren't with Buffy. Being in the sun was a wonderful sensation, but without someone to share it with, he would be just as cold. He didn't have eternity anymore, but that made what time he could have with Buffy even more precious. No, Angel finally answered. Having those things without having Buffy, wouldn't make him happy.
*"Does any of it change how you feel about Buffy?"*
So what if she had his body. So what if she didn't look the same. Inside she was still the same girl he had fallen in love with. His circumstances hadn't changed any of that.
*"Does knowing that she can't give you any of those things change *anything* at all?"*
*"Does it change anything for you?"*
No, Angel had to admit that none of it changed anything. He still loved her every bit as much. He still wanted her, still needed her.
And appearantly she still needed and loved him. But could they make it work? There were so many obstacles to overcome. The least of which was the fact that they still wore each others bodies. It wouldn't be simple.
*"It is, if you make it."*
He had been such a fool. He had left the one he loved, and let the monster win. Well, no more. He would go back and somehow they would make it all work. They would not let the monsters, literal and figurative, win.
Angel turned back towards Buffy's house and let the Slayer's legs carry him as fast as they could run. No time like the present to get started.
**********
"So, Slayer, I take it you and the gelled one, er, blond, er, bloody hell...Angel...had a few choice words?" Spike inquired as he sat next to Buffy on the back porch.
"Yeah," Buffy replied.
"Soul boy still not understand?" Spike asked, looking down as he toed a rock with his boot.
Buffy looked hard at Spike.
"Don't know why you're surprised Slayer. Always could read you like a book. Know you a lot better than you think." Spike supplied.
Buffy smiled, "Yeah, you always did."
Both were silent for several moments.
"Maybe I should give up," Buffy finally spoke. "Move on, find someone else and let them love me. I'm sure I could learn to be.."
"Rot," Spike said emphatically.
"That's complete rot and you know it, Slayer. There's no shortage of men who could love you, me included, but none of them would ever come close to bein' in your heart and soul the way Angel is. You would never be completely happy. Not that I'd mind trying, mind you," Spike smiled.
Buffy smiled back. "I'm sure you wouldn't," Buffy's smiled faltered. "It doesn't really matter though, as long as Angel won't let it happen."
"Give him some more time. I have a feelin' that bein' you is gonna open his eyes a bit. Make him finally see what's in front of him," Spike responded.
"I don't know Spike..." Buffy started.
"Oh, it'll happen all right," Spike cut her off. "And maybe soone than you think." Spike finished as he looked past Buffy and smiled.
Buffy turned in the direction of Spike's gaze and saw Angel come running breathless into the yard. Her eyes silently questioned him as to his decision. His expression answered her. As he smiled, his whole being seemed to light up.
The two lovers closed the distance between each other and came together in a kiss that was full of everything they had ever wanted or hoped. The love, the history, the passion, the need, the fulfillment, all shining through in that moment. They had made their decisions.
As the kiss lingered, something in them seemed to change. As they finally broke apart, each was staring back into their love's rightful face. Angel's hand came up and brushed back a stray lock of blond from Buffy's face, as her hand came up and brushed lightly across Angel's kiss swollen lower lip. They exchanged smiles and leaned back in for another kiss.
"So, we did good here. Love finally won." Codelia whispered from behind Spike.
"Yeah. Love concours all, and all that rot." Spike smiled.
**********
The End
A/N: Hope you enjoyed. Thanks to everyone for their incredible patience and wonderful reviews and suggestions. This story would never have been completed without you!
**********
Chapter 15
Angel thanked The Powers he'd made it out of the house before Codelia caught him. That had certainly been to close a call.
"So, you gonna tell me what that was all about?" Buffy asked. "Not that I blame anyone for wanting to get away from Cordelia, but if you're gonna use me as an excuse..."
"Cordy was about to take me and your body out for a new makeover," Angel explained.
"No way!" Buffy exclaimed. "Although, you do have me looking a little worn around the edges."
"Looks as good as ever to me," Angel smiled. "What's that saying about a gunny sack, or paper bag, or something along those lines? Don't forget that I come from a time when most women weren't really made up a lot."
Buffy squeezed Angel's hand, which she'd conveniently forgotten to let go of after he pulled her out the back door. He didn't seem to mind that little fact though.
"So, you're trying to flatter me by telling me that I look like a peasant girl from a couple hundred years ago?" Buffy teased.
"That's not what I meant and you know it," Angel stated.
"You still have that Angel charm. Kind of disconcerting in my body though," Buffy said with a frown.
"And the California native speak sounds so natural coming from *my* mouth," Angel retorted, but the grin on his face betrayed his mirth.
"Hey, at least it's not some thick Irish brogue. Why don't you speak in a brogue anyway?" Buffy inquired. "I mean, not even a trace of an accent."
"I have an accent," Angel frowned.
"No, you don't. Not even when you're flustered, or angry, or, or, anything," Buffy pointed out. "So when did you loose it?"
"I didn't loose it, so much as, don't use it," Angel replied.
"Ah hah! So you admit that you don't have an accent!" Buffy exclaimed, shaking her finger at Angel.
Angel rolled his eyes, "Alright, I admit it. I worked to get rid of my brogue. I didn't need to stick out once I had my soul. One less thing to draw attention to me. Everyone knew of the vampire with the face of an Angel and a thick Irish brogue. Helpful when you're trying to keep the minions in line. Not so helpful if you're trying to disappear."
"Oh. Well. That makes sense," Buffy responded.
"Can we get on with patroling now?" Angel asked.
"Lead on, oh Slayer of mine," Buffy said, as she extended a hand toward the grave yard they were nearing.
A hand full of fledglings later, Angel was tiring and Buffy was just hitting her stride.
"You know, I could get used to this vampire stuff," Buffy commented off-handedly. "Between the super senses and the strength and speed, it's pretty cool."
"Don't forget the never aging. The never having to work, because you just take what you want," Angel added.
"All potential benefits," Buffy stated.
"Then there's the needing blood and being evil," Angel numerated.
"Well, that part does kind of suck," Buffy said. "But I can see why so many people are drawn to it.
"And of course there's the watching everyone and everything you love die and fall away," Angel pointed out.
"Oh," Buffy quietly replied.
"Yeah, *big* oh," Angel bit out, but then his expression softened. "Buffy, don't fall in love with this. There's so much you will miss if you stay this way." Angel reached up and gently traced the edge of Buffy's cheek. "You were made to be in the light. It's part of who you are. If you stay like this, you'll never be able to walk in the sun. Everything and everyone you hold in your heart will eventually be lost to you. You'll never have a family. No little girls with golden curls. No son with that nose. No one to grow old with. None of it. That's why I left Buffy."
"And none of that really matters," Buffy replied with a sad smile.
Angel urgently replied, "Of course it matters, Buffy. You need and deserve all those things."
"No Angel, what I need is the man I love." Buffy sadly replied. "I don't need or want any of that, if I can't have it with you. If I need the light, it's the light you give me. The only family I need is you. If I am destined to die for my calling, shouldn't I live the life I have with the one who makes me happy? The one who makes my heart and soul cry for joy?"
"Buffy..." Angel started.
"I answered myself those questions a long time ago Angel. I know that everything is different now that I have your body, but it's still all the same. The answers haven't changed. If I had any of that stuff, it still won't make me happy if I didn't have you." Buffy finished.
"I don't know what to say," Angel replied.
"Let me ask you this Angel, now that you have that ability to do and have everything you wanted me to have, does it change anything for you?" Bufy asked.
Angel simply stared at Buffy, dumb-founded that her words were so close to the exact words Spike had used in his question the night before.
After long moments, Angel replied "I don't know. It's not that easy Buffy. It never is."
"It is, if you make it." Buffy stated. After a moment, she slowly leaned down and placed a light kiss on Angel's mouth. A tender, slow kiss that that Buffy poured every last bit of her love into. After a stunned moment, Angel responded to the kiss. Letting his hesitancy and despair finally fall away for just a moment.
Buffy backed up slowly, giving Angel a small, sad smile before turning to head toward her house. Leaving Angel alone to ask himself the same questions she had been so torn over only a few years ago.
**********
Angel slowly paced though the cemetary. Not really paying attention to where he was going or thinking about anything around him. The pesky questions of two stubborn blonds kept nagging at him.
*"Does any of that make you happy?"*
It would be great to be able to have children, but not if they weren't with Buffy. Being in the sun was a wonderful sensation, but without someone to share it with, he would be just as cold. He didn't have eternity anymore, but that made what time he could have with Buffy even more precious. No, Angel finally answered. Having those things without having Buffy, wouldn't make him happy.
*"Does any of it change how you feel about Buffy?"*
So what if she had his body. So what if she didn't look the same. Inside she was still the same girl he had fallen in love with. His circumstances hadn't changed any of that.
*"Does knowing that she can't give you any of those things change *anything* at all?"*
*"Does it change anything for you?"*
No, Angel had to admit that none of it changed anything. He still loved her every bit as much. He still wanted her, still needed her.
And appearantly she still needed and loved him. But could they make it work? There were so many obstacles to overcome. The least of which was the fact that they still wore each others bodies. It wouldn't be simple.
*"It is, if you make it."*
He had been such a fool. He had left the one he loved, and let the monster win. Well, no more. He would go back and somehow they would make it all work. They would not let the monsters, literal and figurative, win.
Angel turned back towards Buffy's house and let the Slayer's legs carry him as fast as they could run. No time like the present to get started.
**********
"So, Slayer, I take it you and the gelled one, er, blond, er, bloody hell...Angel...had a few choice words?" Spike inquired as he sat next to Buffy on the back porch.
"Yeah," Buffy replied.
"Soul boy still not understand?" Spike asked, looking down as he toed a rock with his boot.
Buffy looked hard at Spike.
"Don't know why you're surprised Slayer. Always could read you like a book. Know you a lot better than you think." Spike supplied.
Buffy smiled, "Yeah, you always did."
Both were silent for several moments.
"Maybe I should give up," Buffy finally spoke. "Move on, find someone else and let them love me. I'm sure I could learn to be.."
"Rot," Spike said emphatically.
"That's complete rot and you know it, Slayer. There's no shortage of men who could love you, me included, but none of them would ever come close to bein' in your heart and soul the way Angel is. You would never be completely happy. Not that I'd mind trying, mind you," Spike smiled.
Buffy smiled back. "I'm sure you wouldn't," Buffy's smiled faltered. "It doesn't really matter though, as long as Angel won't let it happen."
"Give him some more time. I have a feelin' that bein' you is gonna open his eyes a bit. Make him finally see what's in front of him," Spike responded.
"I don't know Spike..." Buffy started.
"Oh, it'll happen all right," Spike cut her off. "And maybe soone than you think." Spike finished as he looked past Buffy and smiled.
Buffy turned in the direction of Spike's gaze and saw Angel come running breathless into the yard. Her eyes silently questioned him as to his decision. His expression answered her. As he smiled, his whole being seemed to light up.
The two lovers closed the distance between each other and came together in a kiss that was full of everything they had ever wanted or hoped. The love, the history, the passion, the need, the fulfillment, all shining through in that moment. They had made their decisions.
As the kiss lingered, something in them seemed to change. As they finally broke apart, each was staring back into their love's rightful face. Angel's hand came up and brushed back a stray lock of blond from Buffy's face, as her hand came up and brushed lightly across Angel's kiss swollen lower lip. They exchanged smiles and leaned back in for another kiss.
"So, we did good here. Love finally won." Codelia whispered from behind Spike.
"Yeah. Love concours all, and all that rot." Spike smiled.
**********
The End
A/N: Hope you enjoyed. Thanks to everyone for their incredible patience and wonderful reviews and suggestions. This story would never have been completed without you!