Author note: big reveal coming up
Shawn couldn't believe this day had come. He had been provided with a black suit which itched uncomfortably around the collar. He was being escorted by armed guards who kept their distance from him but were watching him to intently he could feel the hair on the back of his neck rise with anticipation. The temperature was cloudy and looked like it was going to rain. Funerals were depressing and the weather certainly reflected that.
He rounded the corner and spotted the coffin immediately, there were no decorations, simply the coffin laying on the ground next to a giant crater and a man stood in black ready to direct the funeral. It was a simply layout which meant Shawn spotted her immediately.
She was dressed in black, her hair falling in soft curls down to her shoulders and her ankle was shackled with a huge chain that linked to one of the two guards stood metres behind her.
"Mum?" He whispered to himself quietly.
Shawn ignored the coffin and practically ran to his mother.
She turned at the commotion and was shocked to see her son running towards her.
She grinned
, "Shawwnny!" She yelped happily.
Shawn didn't hug her, knowing it wouldn't be allowed but took in his mother's face properly.
"Have you been eating your vegetables?" He grinned.
She smiled and whacked him slightly on the shoulder, "Yummy peas" she moaned absently, looking towards the coffin.
Shawn looked down at the floor, "I'm really sorry"
She didn't look at him but shook her head sadly. "No I am" she whispered,
Shawn squinted shocked, for once she actually sounded serious.
"I wish I had killed him" she stated enthusiastically.
Shawn smiled.
"I wish you had too" he admitted quietly.
"Are you in trouble?" She snapped at him, looking at him in concern.
Shawn shook his head, "No, clearly self defence"
They shared a moments silence, looking at the coffin.
"I told that female detective how to get in the house" she told him boastfully.
Shawn laughed, "I heard...thank you"
She grinned, a manic expression in her eyes.
"And I got your message..." he murmured quietly.
She nodded solemnly, "I had guessed"
Shawn almost couldn't believe it, this was the most he had ever spoken to his mother in years, on previous occasions they were always playing a role, putting on an act. Though he knew his mother didn't tend to have many moments of pure clarity, it seemed like the funeral had shocked her systems enough.
Shawn glanced around and noted the guards listening intently. They all were on edge which was completing understandable with the situation.
"I don't know if they will let us do this again" Shawn murmured.
She started crying, big fat tears rolling down her cheeks. It wasn't long before Shawn joined in.
They wept in silence as the priest gave his speech and watched as the coffin was lowered In to the ground. Then the sky started reflecting their emotions and it started to rain, lightly. Enough so that it was uncomfortable but not enough that anyone thought of moving.
"Are you happy?" She asked, looking at him.
Shawn smiled at her, her long hair starting to straighten as it absorbed the water. She looked so vulnerable.
"Yeah I think I will be...Henry is taking the fatherly role to the extreme"
She smiled sadly. "Can we get a photo?"
Shawn hesitated but knew that it was the least he could do. He turned around and walked toward the guard who was watching him. He seemed shocked to be approached and seemed slightly anxious.
"Can I have my phone, please?" Shawn asked politely.
The guard hesitated.
"Fine keep it, you can be the photographer"
The guard seemed shocked but obeyed instructions and retrieved the phone from his pocket.
Shawn nodded in thanks and his mum came bounding over, excited. She was finally getting another photo!
She grabbed hold of her son, wrapping her arm around him. Shawn relented and did the same and they both smiled at the camera.
"Check it" she demanded childishly, "I'm happy to pose again!"
Shawn gave a sad smile and looked towards the guard who was staring down at the phone.
"It's fine" he told them, he then pocketed the device. "It's time to go"
Shawn turned towards his mother and hugged her tightly, knowing this might might be the last time he could.
"I'll get a copy of the photo to you somehow" he promised.
She smiled cheekily, "I know you will"
Shawn took a step back and remained quiet as he watched the guard escort his mother away. Shawn remained for several minutes after, looking at the partially filled grave, watching at a single man shovelled dirt into the grave.
"You bastard" Shawn whispered, now wanting to get all the words off of his chest but drawing a blank at what to say. Than man was responsible for so much suffering, he didn't deserve the instant painless death Shawn had provided. He should have suffered.
Staring at the grave gave Shawn no sense of closure or satisfaction so he began to walk away. There was only thing he needed right now. A drink.
He turned back towards the guard he knew was watching him. All of the other guards had followed his mother when she left, a few were still guarding the perimeter from afar.
"Name?" Shawn demanded.
The guard answered sharply, "John"
Shawn smirked, "Ok John...I'm going to get shitfaced now. Fancy joining me?"
John studied him, "Sure"
Shawn could have laughed.
They made their way to the hotel they had put him up in, he had stopped there earlier and found the black suit hung in the wardrobe. They were prepared with that but they hadn't had the foresight to stock the fridge? Rookie error.
"Room service it is" Shawn muttered.
John was still looking ever so professional and Shawn was beginning to look like a mess, he had already ditched the jacket and shoes and he had ditched the bandage before the funeral. It stood out too much. So needless to say, Shawn's hair looked a mess. He had styled it before so you couldn't easily tell that part of it was shorter than the rest but the rain had displaced that so it looked like he had left the barbers half way through an appointment.
He picked up the phone and called for alcohol, several different kinds but focused in on the whiskey.
It arrived only minutes later and John poured them a glass of whiskey each immediately.
"I guess I should be honoured to have you looking after me?" Shawn asked rhetorically, "you're John Doe right? Recognise you from the files...you're awesome"
John smiled tightly, " Not everyone has the security clearance to attend a funeral such as that" he replied dryly.
Shawn frowned, "there needn't have been one really"
John simply hummed.
"I really do appreciate it though, man" Shawn told him enthusiastically, "I got to see my mum" he muttered dreamily, already feeling the effects of the alcohol.
John poured him another glass.
"Probably for the last time...no?" Shawn said rhetorically, downing the next glass in under thirty seconds.
John watched him down the glass and nodded slowly, "She's dangerous"
Shawn blew a raspberry.
"I'm glad he's dead" Shawn stated abruptly.
"Me too" John agreed, after several moments of silence.
"Can you...can you get the photo to my mum?" Shawn pleaded, knowing this was probably the best time to ask.
"That's quite dangerous" John told him gently, not agreeing but not disagreeing either.
Shawn shrugged, "She's not going anywhere...but I am. I can't leave her with nothing"
John seemed sympathetic and nodded, "I'll see what I can do"
Shawn was feeling quite intoxicated at this point but still sober enough to realise that he was acting emotionally in front of an agent he greatly respected and admired. He needed more.
"I'm gonna keep drinking till I pass out" Shawn told him.
John looked amused.
"I never get to do to this and I think after saying goodbye to my grandad and my mother...I deserve it" he almost snapped.
John smiled, "Go for it... I'll even rub your back when you vomit" he teased.
Shawn laughed, " Challenge accepted"
Over the next couple of hours Shawn drank himself into oblivion. He didn't throw up but he had vague memories of John forcing him to drink a bottle of water. He passed out at some point and when he woke up the following morning, he cursed his eidetic memory as he remembered everything from the night before in vivid detail.
John emerged from the bathroom in fresh clothes to see Shawn awake and by the look on his face, he knew he was still suffering the consequences of the night before.
"Thanks for looking after me" Shawn grumbled, his head pounding furiously.
John said nothing but handed him a bottle of water which he gulped down enthusiastically.
"We all need to unwind sometimes" he murmured quietly as to not aggravate the other man's headache.
"Yeah but you didn't have to stay...I'm sure you were only required to attend the funeral"
John nodded in affirmation, "True... but I wanted to make sure you were ok"
Shawn smiled weakly, "I think I will be...once I'm home"
John smiled at his term of phrase, "I'm sure Henry will be thrilled if you headed back early"
Shawn laughed quietly to himself.
"Speaking of which..." John began, reaching for his briefcase. "I've some things for you"
He unlocked his briefcase and handed Shawn an envelope.
Shawn rolled his eyes when he saw his CIA badge inside and pistol. The papers were more of a mystery.
"I thought it might be of use" John said absently. "If you choose to submit them...I'll get them approved"
Shawn stared down at the papers, his hands shaking. "I don't know..."
John smiled, "He's your father"
Shawn flinched, "You need someone to talk to all this about...Henry's active status helps"
"Active status?" Shawn asked confused.
"It seems your father is coming out of retirement" John grinned, "He's gonna be the official liaison between agencies and consultants"
Shawn laughed, "Great, so I'm reporting to my dad "
John shook his head lightly, amused.
Shawn laughed once more and stared down at the papers.
"He would need to sign them and you'd have to send for an official courier and wait for a response before telling him anything"
"I...I'll think about it" Shawn stuttered.
John gave him the once over before grabbing his keys, "Come on kid, let's get you home"
Shawn looked at him surprise.
John laughed, "We'll grab donuts on the way"
Shawn licked his lips, "I'm in"
author note, so… who saw that coming?