Be forewarned..This chapter is very dark and sad...(Tearjerker alert)
I won't comment on anything until you've read this chapter..
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Nothing is My Own
******************************************************************
Chapter ten: A Unwanted Farewell
Lily sat staring at a picture, it was the picture Beth had taken their last day at Hogwarts. She wiped the tears off the picture glass. "Oh Beth."
Nobody could figure out what happened to Beth, she wasn't a muggle born, she wasn't a ministry worker, she had absolutely no ties with the Order. Why would the dead eaters attack her?
Lily sat the picture on her bed and walked over to the closet, she removed James nicest black robe and shook it out. This was a day she had been dreading, a day that she wished had never come.
She caught herself on the door, and let out a silent whimper. Her eyes were dry. She had cried more the past six months than she could remember crying in the entire rest of her life put together.
"I have to be strong," she told herself.
She felt like she had to be there for December. Lily would have never dreamed that December O'Riley would have taken the news so badly. She had overheard Remus telling James that December wasn't sleeping at night, but crying instead. December had never dealt with loss, and it wasn't one of her strengths. It was amazing that the one person who knew exactly what to say to Sirius when his brother died, couldn't handle death herself.
The one person that was taking the news worse than December, was Peter. He looked weak and tired when Lily had seen him. She imagined that he had spent many nights crying and blaming himself. She knew that Beth and Peter had gotten very close over the past few months. She was his first true relationship, and they had seemed so happy.
"Lily darling, are you ready yet?" James asked poking his head into the quite bedroom.
Lily caught her breath quickly, "yes love, here is your good robe." She held out the robe for him to take.
He kissed her hand, "are you sure your strong enough to go tonight?"
"Oh course. I have to go," Lily turned away hoping James wouldn't notice how upset she was.
James nodded, December and Remus are here, their waiting down in the living room.
Lily forced a smile, "I'll be down in a minuet."
Lily watched James leave and closed her eyes, "it's time to be strong Lily."
December O'Riley looked like a stranger. She had dropped about 10 pounds since she had discovered Beth's body. Her once flawless face now seemed patchy and raw and her sleek hair seemed dull.
Lily pulled her into a hug, "how are you holding up?"
"You know," December shrugged patting her eyes with a handkerchief. Lily tried to smile, she had to hold her breath to keep the tears from falling.
"Are you ladies ready?" Remus asked.
December nodded and let him lead her towards the portkey the ministry had loaned them for this occasion.
James followed suit and escorted his delicate wife behind December.
The mourning ceremony was beautiful. Decorated in flowers of red and purple.
"Beth loved violets," Lily said as she reached out and touched a flower.
December turned her head into Remus shoulder and he careful rubbed her back.
"Hey guys," Sirius said in a uncharacteristic tone.
James smiled and patted him on the back, "where is Peter?"
Sirius motioned towards the front of the room where Beth's lifeless body was on display. Peter was holding her lifeless hand and staring down at her sleeping face. Lily gasped, she kept telling herself to be strong.
"I'm going to go see how he's doing," James said.
"I'll come with you Prongs," Remus motioned.
He lead December over to Sirius who took her to a seat nearby.
"She's okay now," James said, not sure if he had said the right words.
Peter didn't look up, "she was so innocent."
He had the face of a man with something on his mind.
"You can't blame yourself," Remus tried.
Peter gave a light chuckle, "if you only knew."
James placed a hand on Peter shoulder, "all couples have fights."
"And how would you feel if you did something like this to Lily?" Peter asked suddenly.
James couldn't find his words.
Remus placed his arm around Peter's shoulder, "come on, lets go get take a seat."
Peter shrugged him off, "I don't want to leave her."
He bend down and kissed her cold lips, "I'm so sorry," he whispered.
He followed Remus over to the right side of the room.
Lily tried to greet as many of Beth's guest as possible. She was happy to see how many people wanted to pay their last respect.
"How are you doing?" said the voice of Ludo Bagman from behind her.
"Ludo," she gave him a quick hug.
"I can't believe this," he looked up towards the front of this room.
"You know, we might not have worked out, but I never really got over her."
Lily forced a smile, "she's a hard person to get over."
The night went in a similar fashion. Beth had many friends. People she worked with at the International Quidditch Federation, people from Hogwarts, even most of Beth's X boyfriend had found their way to this dark goodbye. Lily never realized how many lives were affected by this loss, and for some reason even the presence of Rodney Smith, the Slytherin Beth had once dated, warmed her heart.
Lily finally made her way over to December and Sirius, they were talking with another familiar face.
"Dreamy Johnston," Lily said to the dazed looking woman.
"Actually, it's Dreamy Lovegood," she held out her skinny finger to show Lily her ring.
"Congratulations," Lily offered.
"Not really the kind of place to offer a congratulations," Dreamy replied.
Lily gave her a hug, "It's good to see you."
Dreamy nodded, she had caught sight of Peter, and she silently excused herself.
"Lovegood, isn't that the nut that write the Quibber?" Sirius tried to joke, but nobody was in a laughing mood.
"I want to go see Beth," December said weakly to Lily.
Lily nodded and helped her friend to her feet. December trembled at the sight of their fallen friend, and the closer they got to her lifeless corpse the more violently she shook. December buried her face into her hands and Lily tried to comfort her.
"DAMN IT BETH," December swore loudly, and caused the entire crowd to draw its attention towards the front of the room.
"She loved you girls," said a old voice.
"Mrs. Simmons," Lily greeted.
"She talked about you all the time," she seemed to be talking to the air.
She grabbed her daughters hand and gave it a gentle shake, "I'll see you soon child."
"I'm so sorry," Lily tired.
Mrs. Simmons looked at Lily, "I know."
Lily watched as the old woman walked away, not a tear in her eye.
Lily helped December back over to the seats, she knew it wouldn't be long before the ceremony would begin. James placed a kind arm around Lily, "your being so strong tonight."
Lily gave him a thanking look and placed a hand on December's knee. Sirius pulled December close, and tried to ease her cries.
"She's really taking this hard," James acknowledged.
Lily nodded, "how is Peter holding up?"
James shook his head, "he's blaming himself, I'm afraid he's going to try something stupid to avenge her murder."
"Remus will talk some sense into him," Lily comforted.
"Welcome Ladies and Gentlemen. Tonight we are here to pay our last respects to a great witch. She had the heart of a angle and the spirit of a child. All in this room feel an emptiness from her loss. She lived life by a simple thought, she offered her help to any who needed and took nothing from no one.
In these dark times it seems we are saying an untimely goodbye to far to many young souls. It pains me to once again say goodbye to an innocent pure soul who never said an evil word, not even about her greatest enemy. She judged nobody, and never dwelled on what those with less of a heart said about her.
Beth would not want us to cry over her. She made it a personal mission to bring a smile to every sad face she saw. Let us all smile for her. She would have preferred us to laugh, and not cry," Beth's father wiped his eyes and stepped down from the podium.
The crowd rose to their feet and followed his lead to say their last goodbyes. Lily now felt those wet streaks falling down her face. She watched as each of those close to her said their final goodbyes.
Dreamy bent down quietly and Lily saw her whisper, "you were always my favorite."
Remus nodded his head in respect, and a single tear fell from his eye onto Beth's body.
December mouth a silent goodbye and turned her head.
Sirius tucked the shot glass he used for fire whiskey in her hand, "in case you need it."
James just stared deep at her motionless face, Lily saw the tears building behind his eyes. He took off his glasses and passed.
Lily touched Beth's face softly, she didn't have the heart to say goodbye. She was turning, telling herself not to look back but she did.
Peter lifted Beth's hand to his lips, "goodbye." He muffled his tears with the back of her hand, "please forgive me."
Lily turned her head she couldn't watch anymore.
Lily found her seat and watched all the nameless faces pass her best friend. When the last one passed the lid to Beth's final bed softy closed. Lily lowered her head, "goodbye."
The coffin rose into the air and like a whisper disappeared. December threw her head into Sirius shoulder and poured out her soul.
"Come on, I'll take care of you tonight," Sirius told her.
"No, I want to go home," she cried.
She pulled away from Sirius and grabbed Remus arm, "it's okay Padfoot, I'll take care of her tonight."
Sirius had a bitterness to his nod, but he knew was not the time to be jealous.
Peter looked on Sirius face. He had known Sirius Black along time, and he knew that bitterness.
He didn't want to kill Beth, he hated the fact that she had to be his first victim, but that is the way it had to be. He wasn't going to lie to Sirius, it was Remus fault that Beth was dead. If he wasn't a werewolf she would have never caught him.
Read and Review
Nothing is My Own
******************************************************************
Chapter ten: A Unwanted Farewell
Lily sat staring at a picture, it was the picture Beth had taken their last day at Hogwarts. She wiped the tears off the picture glass. "Oh Beth."
Nobody could figure out what happened to Beth, she wasn't a muggle born, she wasn't a ministry worker, she had absolutely no ties with the Order. Why would the dead eaters attack her?
Lily sat the picture on her bed and walked over to the closet, she removed James nicest black robe and shook it out. This was a day she had been dreading, a day that she wished had never come.
She caught herself on the door, and let out a silent whimper. Her eyes were dry. She had cried more the past six months than she could remember crying in the entire rest of her life put together.
"I have to be strong," she told herself.
She felt like she had to be there for December. Lily would have never dreamed that December O'Riley would have taken the news so badly. She had overheard Remus telling James that December wasn't sleeping at night, but crying instead. December had never dealt with loss, and it wasn't one of her strengths. It was amazing that the one person who knew exactly what to say to Sirius when his brother died, couldn't handle death herself.
The one person that was taking the news worse than December, was Peter. He looked weak and tired when Lily had seen him. She imagined that he had spent many nights crying and blaming himself. She knew that Beth and Peter had gotten very close over the past few months. She was his first true relationship, and they had seemed so happy.
"Lily darling, are you ready yet?" James asked poking his head into the quite bedroom.
Lily caught her breath quickly, "yes love, here is your good robe." She held out the robe for him to take.
He kissed her hand, "are you sure your strong enough to go tonight?"
"Oh course. I have to go," Lily turned away hoping James wouldn't notice how upset she was.
James nodded, December and Remus are here, their waiting down in the living room.
Lily forced a smile, "I'll be down in a minuet."
Lily watched James leave and closed her eyes, "it's time to be strong Lily."
December O'Riley looked like a stranger. She had dropped about 10 pounds since she had discovered Beth's body. Her once flawless face now seemed patchy and raw and her sleek hair seemed dull.
Lily pulled her into a hug, "how are you holding up?"
"You know," December shrugged patting her eyes with a handkerchief. Lily tried to smile, she had to hold her breath to keep the tears from falling.
"Are you ladies ready?" Remus asked.
December nodded and let him lead her towards the portkey the ministry had loaned them for this occasion.
James followed suit and escorted his delicate wife behind December.
The mourning ceremony was beautiful. Decorated in flowers of red and purple.
"Beth loved violets," Lily said as she reached out and touched a flower.
December turned her head into Remus shoulder and he careful rubbed her back.
"Hey guys," Sirius said in a uncharacteristic tone.
James smiled and patted him on the back, "where is Peter?"
Sirius motioned towards the front of the room where Beth's lifeless body was on display. Peter was holding her lifeless hand and staring down at her sleeping face. Lily gasped, she kept telling herself to be strong.
"I'm going to go see how he's doing," James said.
"I'll come with you Prongs," Remus motioned.
He lead December over to Sirius who took her to a seat nearby.
"She's okay now," James said, not sure if he had said the right words.
Peter didn't look up, "she was so innocent."
He had the face of a man with something on his mind.
"You can't blame yourself," Remus tried.
Peter gave a light chuckle, "if you only knew."
James placed a hand on Peter shoulder, "all couples have fights."
"And how would you feel if you did something like this to Lily?" Peter asked suddenly.
James couldn't find his words.
Remus placed his arm around Peter's shoulder, "come on, lets go get take a seat."
Peter shrugged him off, "I don't want to leave her."
He bend down and kissed her cold lips, "I'm so sorry," he whispered.
He followed Remus over to the right side of the room.
Lily tried to greet as many of Beth's guest as possible. She was happy to see how many people wanted to pay their last respect.
"How are you doing?" said the voice of Ludo Bagman from behind her.
"Ludo," she gave him a quick hug.
"I can't believe this," he looked up towards the front of this room.
"You know, we might not have worked out, but I never really got over her."
Lily forced a smile, "she's a hard person to get over."
The night went in a similar fashion. Beth had many friends. People she worked with at the International Quidditch Federation, people from Hogwarts, even most of Beth's X boyfriend had found their way to this dark goodbye. Lily never realized how many lives were affected by this loss, and for some reason even the presence of Rodney Smith, the Slytherin Beth had once dated, warmed her heart.
Lily finally made her way over to December and Sirius, they were talking with another familiar face.
"Dreamy Johnston," Lily said to the dazed looking woman.
"Actually, it's Dreamy Lovegood," she held out her skinny finger to show Lily her ring.
"Congratulations," Lily offered.
"Not really the kind of place to offer a congratulations," Dreamy replied.
Lily gave her a hug, "It's good to see you."
Dreamy nodded, she had caught sight of Peter, and she silently excused herself.
"Lovegood, isn't that the nut that write the Quibber?" Sirius tried to joke, but nobody was in a laughing mood.
"I want to go see Beth," December said weakly to Lily.
Lily nodded and helped her friend to her feet. December trembled at the sight of their fallen friend, and the closer they got to her lifeless corpse the more violently she shook. December buried her face into her hands and Lily tried to comfort her.
"DAMN IT BETH," December swore loudly, and caused the entire crowd to draw its attention towards the front of the room.
"She loved you girls," said a old voice.
"Mrs. Simmons," Lily greeted.
"She talked about you all the time," she seemed to be talking to the air.
She grabbed her daughters hand and gave it a gentle shake, "I'll see you soon child."
"I'm so sorry," Lily tired.
Mrs. Simmons looked at Lily, "I know."
Lily watched as the old woman walked away, not a tear in her eye.
Lily helped December back over to the seats, she knew it wouldn't be long before the ceremony would begin. James placed a kind arm around Lily, "your being so strong tonight."
Lily gave him a thanking look and placed a hand on December's knee. Sirius pulled December close, and tried to ease her cries.
"She's really taking this hard," James acknowledged.
Lily nodded, "how is Peter holding up?"
James shook his head, "he's blaming himself, I'm afraid he's going to try something stupid to avenge her murder."
"Remus will talk some sense into him," Lily comforted.
"Welcome Ladies and Gentlemen. Tonight we are here to pay our last respects to a great witch. She had the heart of a angle and the spirit of a child. All in this room feel an emptiness from her loss. She lived life by a simple thought, she offered her help to any who needed and took nothing from no one.
In these dark times it seems we are saying an untimely goodbye to far to many young souls. It pains me to once again say goodbye to an innocent pure soul who never said an evil word, not even about her greatest enemy. She judged nobody, and never dwelled on what those with less of a heart said about her.
Beth would not want us to cry over her. She made it a personal mission to bring a smile to every sad face she saw. Let us all smile for her. She would have preferred us to laugh, and not cry," Beth's father wiped his eyes and stepped down from the podium.
The crowd rose to their feet and followed his lead to say their last goodbyes. Lily now felt those wet streaks falling down her face. She watched as each of those close to her said their final goodbyes.
Dreamy bent down quietly and Lily saw her whisper, "you were always my favorite."
Remus nodded his head in respect, and a single tear fell from his eye onto Beth's body.
December mouth a silent goodbye and turned her head.
Sirius tucked the shot glass he used for fire whiskey in her hand, "in case you need it."
James just stared deep at her motionless face, Lily saw the tears building behind his eyes. He took off his glasses and passed.
Lily touched Beth's face softly, she didn't have the heart to say goodbye. She was turning, telling herself not to look back but she did.
Peter lifted Beth's hand to his lips, "goodbye." He muffled his tears with the back of her hand, "please forgive me."
Lily turned her head she couldn't watch anymore.
Lily found her seat and watched all the nameless faces pass her best friend. When the last one passed the lid to Beth's final bed softy closed. Lily lowered her head, "goodbye."
The coffin rose into the air and like a whisper disappeared. December threw her head into Sirius shoulder and poured out her soul.
"Come on, I'll take care of you tonight," Sirius told her.
"No, I want to go home," she cried.
She pulled away from Sirius and grabbed Remus arm, "it's okay Padfoot, I'll take care of her tonight."
Sirius had a bitterness to his nod, but he knew was not the time to be jealous.
Peter looked on Sirius face. He had known Sirius Black along time, and he knew that bitterness.
He didn't want to kill Beth, he hated the fact that she had to be his first victim, but that is the way it had to be. He wasn't going to lie to Sirius, it was Remus fault that Beth was dead. If he wasn't a werewolf she would have never caught him.