Natty Sue
Chapter Nine

Nat trudged back up towards the Quidditch field, hands buried in the pockets of her jeans. It was a lot of hard work being a cheerful little bitch all the time, and she wondered if people would like or hate her more if she were a sullen little bitch instead. Because really, what is the best kind of bitch to be?
Spotting Draco and his flunkies surrounded by most of Slytherin house, Nat made her way over. It appeared that Draco was telling everyone the lie that Nat had told him earlier. Good God these people are gullible... Nat thought, pushing through the crowd.
"Wazzup?" She asked, coming face to face with Draco, and smiling her sweetest smile. "Relaying information." Stated Draco, motioning for her to move so he could finish talking. "Ooooo special." Nat said sarcastically. "I'm going to go knock some Hufflepuffs off their broomsticks. Okies?" Nat stated, rather than asked. Draco arched an eyebrow, but said nothing, and Nat made her way through the crowd again, gathering some looks of admiration from her fellow Slytherins.

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"Stupid Slytherins." Ron commented harshly, glaring in the direction of the congregation of Slytherins. "What do you think they're up to this time?" He said, turning to Harry.
"Don't know... But since Malfoy's the one talking, we better watch our backs."
"You better watch your backs no matter who's talking, Potter." a female voice drawled lazily behind them. Harry, Ron and Hermione stopped their trek to the Quidditch field and turned to face the speaker.
"Who are you?" Hermione asked hotly.
"Nani? You don't recognize me? I feel so... so... mmm... I'll get back to you on how I feel."
"Just why should we watch our backs?" Ron asked, taking a protective step in front of Hermione.
"Uh, because I snuck up on you when I wasn't even being sneaky. But silly little disease-named-girl doesn't even recognize me... I think I'm going to cry... or something..."
Hermione's eyebrows shot up. "Nat?" she asked, astonished.
"The one and only!" Nat smiled, striking a pose.
"What... Your hair... and... How?"
"Oh, yeah, these stupid Chelle people made me look all pretty. But now my hair is really annoying me, because it's like, in my way all the time... But it's pretty..." Nat said, twisting a strand of black hair around her finger.
"I thought you were a guy!" Ron exclaimed, looking thoroughly confused.
"Hn." Nat said, glaring at Ron. "That's just what Drackie-chan wanted you to think. He's got this weird obsession with lesbians or something... That is, if he knows what one is, he's really clueless actually. Kind of cute in a way..."
"Why did you change your hair though?" Harry asked, "It looked fine before."
Nat blinked, "Whatever... Draco said I needed to look more like a girl, so I do now. Are you saying my hair looks bad?" Nat fixed Harry with a death glare. "Uh... no, I just... was wondering..." Harry said cautiously, taking a step back.
"Oh, okies. So are you guys going to the Quidditch game? It starts soon, doesn't it?"
"Yeah, we are, do you want to sit with us? Normally we sit by house, but we can mix if we want to." Harry said.
"Okies. Draco will probably want to kick my ass, but he's such a wuss it doesn't matter."
"HARRY! She can't sit with us! She's a Slytherin! And she's a lying, cheating, stealing.... SLYTHERIN!"
"How did you know all that?" Nat asked, not one bit phased by Ron's outburst.
"I... Huh?" Ron asked, confused, as Nat just grinned at him.
"You're pretty cute, for a Gryffindor." Nat said playfully. "I like guys who speak their mind, even if that comes out is stupidity. Not that I've met a guy that's actually intelligent... But y'know what I mean, doncha, yo?" Nat grinned, then turned her back on Ron and grabbed Harry by the arm. "Lessgo watch dah game, yo!" Nat said cheerfully, dragging Harry towards the field.

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"So wait... if the Snitch is worth a hundred fifty points, that pretty much means that whoever catches it is going to win. That doesn't seem really fair..."
"It doesn't mean they'll win, it means the game is over. There have been plenty of times where the Snitch is caught by one team but the other team wins."
"Well why would you even catch it if you were behind by so much? I mean, just knock off the other Seeker and wait until your team gets enough points before going after the Snitch."
"You can't 'knock off' the other Seeker! That would be a foul!"
"Not if you made it look like an accident."
"It would still be cheating."
"It's only cheating if you get caught!" Nat declared, looking Harry in the eye. "Whatever it takes, y'know?"
"That's poor sportsmanship."
"It's winning. It doesn't matter how you play the game, it's whether you win or lose."
"I think you've got that a little mixed up."
"I think you're a little mixed up."
"I don't- Look! They're going for the Snitch!" Harry exclaimed, pointing towards the Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff Seekers who were neck and neck, racing for the Snitch. "Oh... Ravenclaw's got it!" Harry cheered as the stands erupted in applause.

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"You've really never been on a broom before?"
"Nope..."
"And you're fifteen?"
"Yup."
"That's just... Wrong."
"Can it, Weasley. Unless you want to see if your blood matches your hair."
"Enough you two! Ron, stop teasing her! It's not her fault! And Nat, stop threatening Ron!" Hermione ordered, glaring at the two of them. "Whatever." Nat said offhandedly, as Ron blushed at being reprimanded.
"Okay, first things first. Nat, stand next to my broom with your right hand over it, and say 'up'." Harry instructed.
Nat positioned herself, and ordered: "Up!" to the broomstick. Nothing happened. "Try it again, but this time like you really, really, mean it." Harry instructed, frowning.
"UP!" Nat ordered the broom again. Nothing happened. "Uhm, alright, just keep trying." Harry said, scratching his head. Even Neville had been able to make the broom move on his first try.

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"UP!" Nat yelled at the broom, which was still laying perfectly still on the ground. Hermione and Ron had long since gone inside, and Harry was laying sprawled on the ground, trying to figure out why Nat couldn't even get the broom to move.
"HARRY! The damn thing isn't goddamn working!" Nat yelled, getting more frustrated by the second.
"Look, maybe we better call it a day, you're not going to get it to work if you're all worked up."
"But I wanna make it work!" Nat whined.
"Try it once more." Harry said with a sigh, "And if it doesn't work, then we'll call it a day. Alright?"
"Alright..." Nat agreed, a bit reluctantly, positioning herself once again.
"Up!" She commanded. Nothing happened.

+++

"Jelly Jam Jubes." Nat said to the stone gargoyle, who moved away, allowing Nat to enter Dumbledore's office.
Nat knocked sharply on the door three times, then waited for an answer. "Come in." The reply came almost immediately. She stepped through the door and looked around. Dumbledore was seated at his desk, feeding bits of a biscuit to a golden bird.
"You wanted to see me?" Nat asked, her eyes on the bird whose tail was aflame. "Yes, here, have a seat. Would you like some tea?" Dumbledore inquired, pulling a tea set off a small table next to his desk.
"Yummy!" Nat said happily in reply.
"I'll take that as a 'yes' then." Dumbledore said, smiling.
"That's a pretty birdy!" Nat chirped happily.
"Why yes, he's a phoenix and his name is Fawkes."
"Doesn't look like a fox..."
"Not a fox, Fawkes."
"That's kind of a gross thing to name a bird."
"I'm sorry?"
"Fawkes, I mean, you KNOW what that sound like, right?"
"It sounds like fox, as you said before."
"Yeah but... Never mind, I just don't give a fawk."
"Oh, I see. Nat, I think it would really be nice if you... were more polite. You tend to curse excessively."
"Yup!"
"That's not a good thing."
"Oh? Why the fawk not?"
"Nat please. Here have some tea, and let's talk."
"What-the-fawk-ever." Nat said with a grin, accepting the tea.
"Nat, please. Can you be serious for a few minutes?"
"What's in it for me?"
"An intelligent conversation."
"I'm not used to having those. I have three brothers y'know."
Dumbledore rubbed his temples. The Weasley twins, he could deal with, this girl, she went out of her way to be obnoxious, in the most obnoxious way possible. "Nat, I just want to have a serious conversation, because I'm worried about you."
"Why for, Mr. Man?"
"Please, Nat. Just be serious for a few minutes."
"Ooookies." Nat said with her cutest smile.
"Thank you." Dumbledore said. "Now, I'm worried about this sudden change in your appearance. I don't think you should go so far as to change the way you look to fit in." Dumbledore said kindly.
"But Draco said I had to."
"Why would Draco say that?"
"Because he's Draco."
"Did you want to change your appearance?"
"Not really, but now I'm prettier so it's okies."
"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder."
"Draco said I look better."
"Is Draco's opinion that important?"
"Uhm... Maybe?"
"And why would his opinion be so important?"
"Because... uh... mm..."
Dumbledore smiled kindly. "Do you by any chance like Draco?"
"Like him? He's a dumbass!"
"I see... But do you have a crush on him?"
"No. And if I did I wouldn't tell you. But right now I'd rather find some yummy Irish guy."
"I see."
"Anyhoo, I kinda like looking like this. It's nifty."
"Alright. It is your choice after all. Now I've found you a tutor for Transfiguration."
"Oooh, nifty-keen."
"I believe you know Hermione Granger?"
"The disease girl?!"
"Yes... No. I'm sorry?"
"Her name sounds like a disease."
"I see... In any case, we don't normally mix houses for studying, at least not Slytherins and Gryffindors, but you seem to get along well enough with them. Or as well as you do with anybody."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Continuing on!" Dumbledore hurriedly said, waving his hand as if dismissing the previous conversation. "Now that your appearance has changed, do you still not want us to use 'gender-specific terms' when addressing you?"
"No, Draco says I get to be a girl now. Although I suppose Nat isn't a very girly name. Maybe you should call me by Natsume now?"
"If that's what you want, although I rather think the name Nat suits you."
"Well I kinda like it... But then.. mmm I'll ask Draco."
Dumbledore arched an eyebrow. "Why is it Draco's decision?"
"Because..."
"Alright then. Now, your tutoring sessions will start on Tuesday. You will need to work out a schedule with Miss Granger..."

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Note: I fixed the typos, added the moral... hehe... nothing else to say... I'll write a new Natty Sue chapter soon. ^_^ Go here: http://remus-lupin.com and join the message board. I'm Asaria Moonglow. Thank you. *bows*

Today's Moral: A little Lubricant goes a long way.

Disclaimer: You think I own Harry Potter? Ick. Harry is yucky. Give me a Draco, Snape, Oliver, or Seamus.