I know, I know!!!! WAY beyond late. SORRY. The floppy drive just got fixed today. So I can finally update, after finishing the chapter, of course.
I'll make this as short as possible so I thank profusely those that took the time to review. You know who you are.
Anyway.... Here ya go.....
Chapter Seven- Preparations
After breakfast Faith wandered around until she found the palace gardens. As she strolled along the paths she ignored the curious and, oftentimes, distasteful looks she received from passing elves. She inhaled deeply, breathing in the scent of the elven flowers.
Up ahead she spotted in a clearing an old, gnarled oak tree; perfect for climbing. She jumped up and, grabbing hold of a low branch, swung herself effortlessly into the tree. As she climbed higher she clutched her green skirt, hiking it up past her knees to keep it out of the way.
On the outside she may have appeared calm and tranquil, but on the inside... Inside she was in turmoil.
'Immortality?! Why the fuck didn't he tell me?!'
When she reached as high as she could she proceeded to lean against the trunk, one leg hanging over the branch she sat on.
"Faith?"
She knew that voice.
'Why the flying rat's ass can't he leave me alone?!'
"What the hell are you doing here?"
Legolas flinched at her cold tone, but continued to climb.
"I always come here to think, or when something troubles me. In fact I planted this tree as an acorn."
She watched as he climbed easily and quietly towards her until he was on her branch. Her eyes followed him as he sat across from her. She wanted to look away when his silver blue eyes met hers, but refused.
'There is no damn way I'm gonna run.'
"Why didn't you just tell me in the beginning?"
"I had forgotten," he answered as best he could truthfully.
"Forgotten?" she scoffed. "How the hell does being immortal slip your mind?"
"It doesn't. I live with the knowledge that eventually the things I adore will die. Including this tree and my mortal friends. I had simply forgotten that you did not already know. Every person in this world knows that the Firstborn are graced with immortality."
He heard her sigh and turn her head away from him. The soft green glow created by the sunlight through the leaves reflected in her eyes. Eyes that held an inner conflict.
'I wonder if she realizes how much she is allowing to show?' Legolas thought to himself.
'What the fuck am I gonna to do? To forgive or not to forgive. That is the question. Hmmmm. Choices, choices.'
"All right. You're forgiven, Pretty Boy."
She turned towards him and gave him a small smile.
"Diola lle, mellon."
She growled in annoyance.
"Would you stop doin' that?"
"Doing what?" Legolas asked innocently.
"'Mellon' means 'friend.' I get that, but what the hell does 'diola lle' mean?"
"Thank you."
"For what?"
"It means 'thank you.' Why did you get so upset?"
"Cause you're talkin' in a language I never heard of let alone know and that pisses me off. There's not many languages that I don't know at least the basics to."
"How many tongues exist in your world?" the elf asked curiously.
"A lot."
She raised her head proudly.
"I'm fluent in Spanish, French, Chinese, Japanese, German, Norwegian, Russian, Greek, and Swedish. Hell, I even know some Latin."
Legolas's eyes widened in amazement. There were so many! Suddenly an idea came to mind.
"I'll make a deal with you."
"A deal?"
She looked him over, trying to determine what it could possibly be. However, all she was met with was an angelic face devoid of any emotion. Even his body was relaxed displaying none of his intentions.
She smirked and, crossing her arms over her chest, she tilted her head to the side. She never was one to back down from a challenge.
"Whatcha got in mind, Pretty Boy?"
"A simple trade. I will teach you Elvish if you will teach me one of your tongues."
"You got a deal," she answered without hesitation.
'This is gonna be fun.'
Legolas smiled at her enthusiasm, though little of it showed. Again his mind wandered over why Faith had forgiven him so easily.
"Faith?"
"Hmm."
"If you don't mind me asking, why did you forgive me so quickly?"
The corner of her mouth quirked upwards into a grin.
"I was wonderin' when you'd ask. You wouldn't believe how many people ask that same question. Even the President did a few years back." Shrugging she answered, "I rarely hold grudges. I either forgive ya or I don't, and if I don't.... Well.... Let's just say many end up wishin' I had."
She chuckled to herself, thinking of a couple amusing such instances.
Legolas watched as her eyes drifted to a gap in the leaves of the oak tree. She was fighting with herself again. Whether to be at peace with this world or not.
He may have wanted her, and still did, but he knew she would never be his. Especially now that she knew the truth. He also knew, without a doubt that she would become one of his greatest friends. Her devotion, temper, and all out honesty made her one of a kind.
As Faith sat looking over the many trees she pondered about her past and deep down the uncertainty about being in this beautiful place stirred.
She felt like she didn't belong. In truth she could have overlooked the fact that this was a totally different world from her own. That wasn't what bothered her. What did was the fact that these strange, beautiful people set off an aura of purity. They were pure while her hands were stained with the blood of thousands. Guilty and innocent alike.
Still.... It was almost impossible to not let the tranquility of this race and world rub off on you.
"Fay?! Where are ya?!"
The two were jolted out of their thoughts by the questioning shout.
"It would seem that you are wanted," Legolas commented with a grin, noticing Faith's upset scowl.
Gathering her skirts, she started her downwards climb.
"It's an old story. At times I wonder how long they'd survive without me."
"Yet you wouldn't have it any other way."
It was a statement, not a question.
"Not a chance."
Once their feet were planted on the solid soil, they headed towards the calling voice.
"General Faith?!"
"Stop shouting, Joe! I'm right behind ya."
The black man spun on his heels just in time to see Faith and Legolas step onto the garden path.
"There you are," he exclaimed, running up to them.
"What do you want?" she asked, hopping up and placing him in a headlock.
Legolas watched as the two humans wrestled around.
"You said we were gonna help out," Joe said while trying to pry her arms away from his neck.
"I did, didn't I?"
"Yeah, and I came to get ya."
"Well, here I am, so let's go."
The elf laughed as Faith proceeded to the palace dragging the man along. Joe's thick arms hung at his sides and his back hunched as he tried to walk without stepping on his leader's dress or tripping over his own feet.
Upon reaching the stairs she released him, only semi aware of the elven guards casting looks of disdain in their direction. She chose to ignore them. After all, what did she care what others thought.
She pushed open the great door and stepped inside.
"All right, Joe. Led us to the guys."
The man nodded and started down the corridor.
"So were's the party gonna be?" Faith asked as she fell into step next to Legolas.
"Where we had breakfast this morning. The Banquet Hall."
They walked in a comfortable silence until Joe turned to face Legolas.
"Your dad went back to his study. He said you could keep an eye on us."
"Probably to make sure you don't break anything," Faith snorted.
"Me? What about you goin' psycho on his guards? Oh, yeah. We heard all about that."
She looked at him with steely eyes.
"I had an excuse."
Joe brought his hands to his heart and sighed.
"It's nice to be loved. Especially by somebody who doesn't give affection easily."
Faith just huffed and walked into the room before stopping dead in her tracks.
"What the fuck?!"
"Fay," Tony pleaded, his voice muffled by the tapestry draped over his head and around his body. "Help."
"Shit, guys," she mumbled, bending down and picking up the end of the blood red streamer that wrapped around him from head to toe.
As soon as he was released Tony glared at his laughing comrades, most notably, Ivan.
"Just because I'm a few years younger than you doesn't give you the right to be such a fuckin' prick!"
"That's not why I do it," Ivan stated, grinning. "I mean... Fay's younger than you and I don't pick on her."
"Yeah, but I can kick your ass."
"True," he said simply, bringing the cup of wine to his lips.
Legolas smiled as the humans continued to joke with each other. Such openness like this did not often grace the halls of any city, let alone an elven one.
"That's one of the reasons I picked 'em ya know."
Looking out the corner of his eye, he noticed Faith's features open with affection as she watched her men struggling over the contents of a large box.
"What is?"
"Their outlook on life. They always seem so.... childlike, even though they've seen their fair share of horrors."
"Perhaps they get it from you," Legolas suggested.
"I don't know," she sighed shaking her head.
They stood watching the men huddled together, and even with his superior hearing Legolas couldn't make out what was said. Beside him Faith frowned.
"They're up to something."
They broke apart, each grinning, and picked up various decorations.
"When a moon is hanging out a window...."
"Oh, God," Faith groaned and brought her face into her hands.
Her men ignored her and continued their odd song.
"Some imbecile is proud of his behind
You've now received way too much info
And the image is burnin' through your mind
There's nothin' grosser than a man with a hairy ass
Man with a hairy ass
A hairy ass
Everybody!
A hairy ass
Every chair is nice and cushy
When you have a bushy tushy
You can make it look more dapper
If you buy a good weed whacker
Doesn't help a girl's lavedo
When you wear a tiny speedo
A hairy ass
Everybody!
A hairy ass"
Legolas laughed along with Faith. Though he understood little, he got the brunt of it, and truth be told.... It was funny.
Straightening, the woman walked forward, her smile wide as she sang the last part.
"A girl is lying in a dark room
Her brand new lover's naked in her bed
She runs her fingers down his body
And let's out a scream that wakes the dead
Her hands are tangled up in his scary, hairy ass
His scary, hairy ass
A hairy ass
Everybody!
A hairy ass"
Their laughter was infectious and soon the elven prince was doubled over with it, joining them on the marble floor. They laid like that for a while trying to regain their breath. Legolas himself was quite content with Faith's head comfortably on his shoulder. All too soon they picked themselves up. As the elf helped up the woman he commented on their song.
"That was the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard."
Shane laughed and nodded his head.
"Fuckin' hilarious though."
For the next half hour the group worked on the decorations, hanging tapestries and streamers.
"Fay?"
"Yeah, Brad."
"Sing us a song."
She sighed and finished tying off the end of a streamer.
"Why?"
"Oh c'mon Fay," Connor probed. It was rare that she sang, but she did have an amazing voice.
She shook her auburn head dejectedly.
"Fine. What do you want to hear?"
"What about Aenema by Tool," Alex suggested.
"You better help with the 'learn to swim' part," she warned.
She smiled and started.
"Some say the end is near
Some say we'll see Armageddon soon
Certainly hope we will
I sure could use a vacation from this
bull... shit... three... ring... cir... cus... side... show of...
Freaks!
Here in this hopeless fuckin' hole we call LA
The only way to fix it is to flush it all away
Any fuckin' time
Any fuckin' day
Learn to swim, see you down in Arizona bay
Fret for your figure and
Fret for your latte and
Fret for your lawsuit and
Fret for your hairpiece and
Fret for your Prozac and
Fret for your pilot and
Fret for your contract and
Fret for your car.
It's a bull... shit... three... ring... cir... cus... side... show of...
Freaks!
Here in this hopeless fuckin' hole we call LA
The only way to fix it is to flush it all away
Any fuckin' time
Any fuckin' day
Learn to swim, I'll see you down in Arizona bay
Some say a comet will fall from the sky
Followed by meteor showers and tidal waves
Followed by fault lines that cannot sit still
Followed by millions of dumbfounded dipshits
And some say the end is near
Some say we'll see Armageddon soon
Certainly hope we will
I sure could use a vacation from this
...Stupid shit... silly shit... stupid shit...
One great big festering neon distraction
I've a suggestion to keep you all occupied
Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim.
Mom's gonna fix it all soon
Mom's comin' round to put it back the way it ought to beeeeeeee.......
Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim.
Fuck L Ron Hubbard and
Fuck all his clones
Fuck all these gun-toting
Hip gangster wannabe's
Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim.
Fuck retro anything
Fuck your tattoos
Fuck all you junkies and
Fuck your short memory
Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim.
Yeah, fuck smiley glad-hands
With hidden agendas
Fuck these dysfunctional
Insecure actresses
Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim.
Cuz I'm praying for rain
I'm praying for tidal waves
I wanna see the ground give way
I wanna watch it all go down
Mom please flush it all away
I wanna see it go riding down
I wanna watch it go right in
Watch you flush it all away
Yeah, Time to bring it down again
Yeah, Don't just call me pessimist
Try and read between the lines
Yeah, I can't imagine why you wouldn't welcome any change, my friend
I wanna see it come down
Bring it down
Suck it down
Flush it down"
Her voice was strong and everything Legolas would associate with her. The song itself was dark, telling of destruction, but he knew the men paid little attention to the words. Instead concentrating on their leader's voice singing to the unknown beat.
"See," Justin smirked. "That wasn't so bad."
"Don't get cocky, Justin."
"Me? Never."
"Yeah, well.... We're done," Connor commented, looking around to admire their work.
Turning in a circle Faith looked at the blood red, forest green and brown streamers intertwined around the pillars and twisting from one end of the room to another. All in all it was done well.
"Who would've thought a bunch of dipshits like you could've pulled somethin' like this off."
"We'll take that as a compliment," Kevin said grinning at Faith.
They all moved towards the table and sat, quenching their thirst of wine and water.
"Do any of you remember that poem thing we all wrote?" Brad asked.
"You mean that piece of shit we did 'cause we were bored out of our fuckin' minds?"
Ivan received a slap to the head.
"Oww! Fay!"
"Shut up. What about it, Brad?"
"I was just thinkin'."
"You do too much of that," Alex announced, smiling. "But, yeah. I remember."
"Would you recite it," Legolas asked.
The men looked towards Faith who just shrugged her shoulders in response.
"Go ahead. I don't care."
Grinning happily all ten of them began.
"First we got Faith
She's best in the world
You piss her off and
She'll give a whirl
Tough little bitch
She's got it all
One wrong look and
You are bound to fall
Next we got Shane
The blue eyed wonder
All around good guy
And mischief maker
Third is Ivan
The Russian prick
Everyone agrees he
Has a two inch dick
Red head Connor is
Next in line
He's your typical
Irish swine
Fifth is a mutt
who's name is Brad
Basic braniac
Carries a pad
Sixth we got a man
That we call Tony
We have deemed him
As one big sissy
Next is Kevin
Our Scottish guy
Plain and ignorant
Thinks he flies
Then we got Joe
He's one of a kind
Can be one big ass
But we don't mind
Lance is nothin'
But a black hole pit
Eats so much
He's always gotta sit
Justin's your typical
Ladies man
Can't really fight
But thinks he can
Alex is last
Kind and calm
He likes to read
People's palms
We're the Death Squad
So hear us well
We might come for ya
You can never tell"
Legolas stared at them in confusion.
"I regret to tell you that there are terms which I know not the meanings of."
"Don't worry," Faith told him, waving her hand dismissively. "You will."
"If you don't mind me saying, you seem to have adjusted quite well."
Indeed, they were singing and laughing as if they had been here always. They were perfectly at ease. At least it appeared that way.
"Yeah... Well... We make the best out of every situation."
"I'm still not convinced that this isn't a dream."
"Tony..."
Faith's eyes found the Italian man leaning against a pillar gazing at everything around him with a look of uncertainty.
"Is this gonna be an issue with you?"
****************************************************************************************************************************
It has been brought to my attention that in chapter four I referred to Gollum as a Schizophrenic. This is incorrect. I apologize for making seem as if I'm one of those that enjoy teasing those less fortunate than I.
In truth, I took a psychology class earlier this year and while I was writing I confused Schizophrenia with disasociative identity disorder (courtesy of Stephanie, thank you so very much).
Once again I am extremely sorry for this mistake and the fact this chapter took so long to get out. The next one is almost done and I should have it posted in a week.
On a lighter note, the Hairy Ass song... You can thank, my brother. I have no idea where he got it, but he managed to cram it into my head. Besides, it IS funny.
BYE
I'll make this as short as possible so I thank profusely those that took the time to review. You know who you are.
Anyway.... Here ya go.....
Chapter Seven- Preparations
After breakfast Faith wandered around until she found the palace gardens. As she strolled along the paths she ignored the curious and, oftentimes, distasteful looks she received from passing elves. She inhaled deeply, breathing in the scent of the elven flowers.
Up ahead she spotted in a clearing an old, gnarled oak tree; perfect for climbing. She jumped up and, grabbing hold of a low branch, swung herself effortlessly into the tree. As she climbed higher she clutched her green skirt, hiking it up past her knees to keep it out of the way.
On the outside she may have appeared calm and tranquil, but on the inside... Inside she was in turmoil.
'Immortality?! Why the fuck didn't he tell me?!'
When she reached as high as she could she proceeded to lean against the trunk, one leg hanging over the branch she sat on.
"Faith?"
She knew that voice.
'Why the flying rat's ass can't he leave me alone?!'
"What the hell are you doing here?"
Legolas flinched at her cold tone, but continued to climb.
"I always come here to think, or when something troubles me. In fact I planted this tree as an acorn."
She watched as he climbed easily and quietly towards her until he was on her branch. Her eyes followed him as he sat across from her. She wanted to look away when his silver blue eyes met hers, but refused.
'There is no damn way I'm gonna run.'
"Why didn't you just tell me in the beginning?"
"I had forgotten," he answered as best he could truthfully.
"Forgotten?" she scoffed. "How the hell does being immortal slip your mind?"
"It doesn't. I live with the knowledge that eventually the things I adore will die. Including this tree and my mortal friends. I had simply forgotten that you did not already know. Every person in this world knows that the Firstborn are graced with immortality."
He heard her sigh and turn her head away from him. The soft green glow created by the sunlight through the leaves reflected in her eyes. Eyes that held an inner conflict.
'I wonder if she realizes how much she is allowing to show?' Legolas thought to himself.
'What the fuck am I gonna to do? To forgive or not to forgive. That is the question. Hmmmm. Choices, choices.'
"All right. You're forgiven, Pretty Boy."
She turned towards him and gave him a small smile.
"Diola lle, mellon."
She growled in annoyance.
"Would you stop doin' that?"
"Doing what?" Legolas asked innocently.
"'Mellon' means 'friend.' I get that, but what the hell does 'diola lle' mean?"
"Thank you."
"For what?"
"It means 'thank you.' Why did you get so upset?"
"Cause you're talkin' in a language I never heard of let alone know and that pisses me off. There's not many languages that I don't know at least the basics to."
"How many tongues exist in your world?" the elf asked curiously.
"A lot."
She raised her head proudly.
"I'm fluent in Spanish, French, Chinese, Japanese, German, Norwegian, Russian, Greek, and Swedish. Hell, I even know some Latin."
Legolas's eyes widened in amazement. There were so many! Suddenly an idea came to mind.
"I'll make a deal with you."
"A deal?"
She looked him over, trying to determine what it could possibly be. However, all she was met with was an angelic face devoid of any emotion. Even his body was relaxed displaying none of his intentions.
She smirked and, crossing her arms over her chest, she tilted her head to the side. She never was one to back down from a challenge.
"Whatcha got in mind, Pretty Boy?"
"A simple trade. I will teach you Elvish if you will teach me one of your tongues."
"You got a deal," she answered without hesitation.
'This is gonna be fun.'
Legolas smiled at her enthusiasm, though little of it showed. Again his mind wandered over why Faith had forgiven him so easily.
"Faith?"
"Hmm."
"If you don't mind me asking, why did you forgive me so quickly?"
The corner of her mouth quirked upwards into a grin.
"I was wonderin' when you'd ask. You wouldn't believe how many people ask that same question. Even the President did a few years back." Shrugging she answered, "I rarely hold grudges. I either forgive ya or I don't, and if I don't.... Well.... Let's just say many end up wishin' I had."
She chuckled to herself, thinking of a couple amusing such instances.
Legolas watched as her eyes drifted to a gap in the leaves of the oak tree. She was fighting with herself again. Whether to be at peace with this world or not.
He may have wanted her, and still did, but he knew she would never be his. Especially now that she knew the truth. He also knew, without a doubt that she would become one of his greatest friends. Her devotion, temper, and all out honesty made her one of a kind.
As Faith sat looking over the many trees she pondered about her past and deep down the uncertainty about being in this beautiful place stirred.
She felt like she didn't belong. In truth she could have overlooked the fact that this was a totally different world from her own. That wasn't what bothered her. What did was the fact that these strange, beautiful people set off an aura of purity. They were pure while her hands were stained with the blood of thousands. Guilty and innocent alike.
Still.... It was almost impossible to not let the tranquility of this race and world rub off on you.
"Fay?! Where are ya?!"
The two were jolted out of their thoughts by the questioning shout.
"It would seem that you are wanted," Legolas commented with a grin, noticing Faith's upset scowl.
Gathering her skirts, she started her downwards climb.
"It's an old story. At times I wonder how long they'd survive without me."
"Yet you wouldn't have it any other way."
It was a statement, not a question.
"Not a chance."
Once their feet were planted on the solid soil, they headed towards the calling voice.
"General Faith?!"
"Stop shouting, Joe! I'm right behind ya."
The black man spun on his heels just in time to see Faith and Legolas step onto the garden path.
"There you are," he exclaimed, running up to them.
"What do you want?" she asked, hopping up and placing him in a headlock.
Legolas watched as the two humans wrestled around.
"You said we were gonna help out," Joe said while trying to pry her arms away from his neck.
"I did, didn't I?"
"Yeah, and I came to get ya."
"Well, here I am, so let's go."
The elf laughed as Faith proceeded to the palace dragging the man along. Joe's thick arms hung at his sides and his back hunched as he tried to walk without stepping on his leader's dress or tripping over his own feet.
Upon reaching the stairs she released him, only semi aware of the elven guards casting looks of disdain in their direction. She chose to ignore them. After all, what did she care what others thought.
She pushed open the great door and stepped inside.
"All right, Joe. Led us to the guys."
The man nodded and started down the corridor.
"So were's the party gonna be?" Faith asked as she fell into step next to Legolas.
"Where we had breakfast this morning. The Banquet Hall."
They walked in a comfortable silence until Joe turned to face Legolas.
"Your dad went back to his study. He said you could keep an eye on us."
"Probably to make sure you don't break anything," Faith snorted.
"Me? What about you goin' psycho on his guards? Oh, yeah. We heard all about that."
She looked at him with steely eyes.
"I had an excuse."
Joe brought his hands to his heart and sighed.
"It's nice to be loved. Especially by somebody who doesn't give affection easily."
Faith just huffed and walked into the room before stopping dead in her tracks.
"What the fuck?!"
"Fay," Tony pleaded, his voice muffled by the tapestry draped over his head and around his body. "Help."
"Shit, guys," she mumbled, bending down and picking up the end of the blood red streamer that wrapped around him from head to toe.
As soon as he was released Tony glared at his laughing comrades, most notably, Ivan.
"Just because I'm a few years younger than you doesn't give you the right to be such a fuckin' prick!"
"That's not why I do it," Ivan stated, grinning. "I mean... Fay's younger than you and I don't pick on her."
"Yeah, but I can kick your ass."
"True," he said simply, bringing the cup of wine to his lips.
Legolas smiled as the humans continued to joke with each other. Such openness like this did not often grace the halls of any city, let alone an elven one.
"That's one of the reasons I picked 'em ya know."
Looking out the corner of his eye, he noticed Faith's features open with affection as she watched her men struggling over the contents of a large box.
"What is?"
"Their outlook on life. They always seem so.... childlike, even though they've seen their fair share of horrors."
"Perhaps they get it from you," Legolas suggested.
"I don't know," she sighed shaking her head.
They stood watching the men huddled together, and even with his superior hearing Legolas couldn't make out what was said. Beside him Faith frowned.
"They're up to something."
They broke apart, each grinning, and picked up various decorations.
"When a moon is hanging out a window...."
"Oh, God," Faith groaned and brought her face into her hands.
Her men ignored her and continued their odd song.
"Some imbecile is proud of his behind
You've now received way too much info
And the image is burnin' through your mind
There's nothin' grosser than a man with a hairy ass
Man with a hairy ass
A hairy ass
Everybody!
A hairy ass
Every chair is nice and cushy
When you have a bushy tushy
You can make it look more dapper
If you buy a good weed whacker
Doesn't help a girl's lavedo
When you wear a tiny speedo
A hairy ass
Everybody!
A hairy ass"
Legolas laughed along with Faith. Though he understood little, he got the brunt of it, and truth be told.... It was funny.
Straightening, the woman walked forward, her smile wide as she sang the last part.
"A girl is lying in a dark room
Her brand new lover's naked in her bed
She runs her fingers down his body
And let's out a scream that wakes the dead
Her hands are tangled up in his scary, hairy ass
His scary, hairy ass
A hairy ass
Everybody!
A hairy ass"
Their laughter was infectious and soon the elven prince was doubled over with it, joining them on the marble floor. They laid like that for a while trying to regain their breath. Legolas himself was quite content with Faith's head comfortably on his shoulder. All too soon they picked themselves up. As the elf helped up the woman he commented on their song.
"That was the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard."
Shane laughed and nodded his head.
"Fuckin' hilarious though."
For the next half hour the group worked on the decorations, hanging tapestries and streamers.
"Fay?"
"Yeah, Brad."
"Sing us a song."
She sighed and finished tying off the end of a streamer.
"Why?"
"Oh c'mon Fay," Connor probed. It was rare that she sang, but she did have an amazing voice.
She shook her auburn head dejectedly.
"Fine. What do you want to hear?"
"What about Aenema by Tool," Alex suggested.
"You better help with the 'learn to swim' part," she warned.
She smiled and started.
"Some say the end is near
Some say we'll see Armageddon soon
Certainly hope we will
I sure could use a vacation from this
bull... shit... three... ring... cir... cus... side... show of...
Freaks!
Here in this hopeless fuckin' hole we call LA
The only way to fix it is to flush it all away
Any fuckin' time
Any fuckin' day
Learn to swim, see you down in Arizona bay
Fret for your figure and
Fret for your latte and
Fret for your lawsuit and
Fret for your hairpiece and
Fret for your Prozac and
Fret for your pilot and
Fret for your contract and
Fret for your car.
It's a bull... shit... three... ring... cir... cus... side... show of...
Freaks!
Here in this hopeless fuckin' hole we call LA
The only way to fix it is to flush it all away
Any fuckin' time
Any fuckin' day
Learn to swim, I'll see you down in Arizona bay
Some say a comet will fall from the sky
Followed by meteor showers and tidal waves
Followed by fault lines that cannot sit still
Followed by millions of dumbfounded dipshits
And some say the end is near
Some say we'll see Armageddon soon
Certainly hope we will
I sure could use a vacation from this
...Stupid shit... silly shit... stupid shit...
One great big festering neon distraction
I've a suggestion to keep you all occupied
Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim.
Mom's gonna fix it all soon
Mom's comin' round to put it back the way it ought to beeeeeeee.......
Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim.
Fuck L Ron Hubbard and
Fuck all his clones
Fuck all these gun-toting
Hip gangster wannabe's
Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim.
Fuck retro anything
Fuck your tattoos
Fuck all you junkies and
Fuck your short memory
Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim.
Yeah, fuck smiley glad-hands
With hidden agendas
Fuck these dysfunctional
Insecure actresses
Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim. Learn to swim.
Cuz I'm praying for rain
I'm praying for tidal waves
I wanna see the ground give way
I wanna watch it all go down
Mom please flush it all away
I wanna see it go riding down
I wanna watch it go right in
Watch you flush it all away
Yeah, Time to bring it down again
Yeah, Don't just call me pessimist
Try and read between the lines
Yeah, I can't imagine why you wouldn't welcome any change, my friend
I wanna see it come down
Bring it down
Suck it down
Flush it down"
Her voice was strong and everything Legolas would associate with her. The song itself was dark, telling of destruction, but he knew the men paid little attention to the words. Instead concentrating on their leader's voice singing to the unknown beat.
"See," Justin smirked. "That wasn't so bad."
"Don't get cocky, Justin."
"Me? Never."
"Yeah, well.... We're done," Connor commented, looking around to admire their work.
Turning in a circle Faith looked at the blood red, forest green and brown streamers intertwined around the pillars and twisting from one end of the room to another. All in all it was done well.
"Who would've thought a bunch of dipshits like you could've pulled somethin' like this off."
"We'll take that as a compliment," Kevin said grinning at Faith.
They all moved towards the table and sat, quenching their thirst of wine and water.
"Do any of you remember that poem thing we all wrote?" Brad asked.
"You mean that piece of shit we did 'cause we were bored out of our fuckin' minds?"
Ivan received a slap to the head.
"Oww! Fay!"
"Shut up. What about it, Brad?"
"I was just thinkin'."
"You do too much of that," Alex announced, smiling. "But, yeah. I remember."
"Would you recite it," Legolas asked.
The men looked towards Faith who just shrugged her shoulders in response.
"Go ahead. I don't care."
Grinning happily all ten of them began.
"First we got Faith
She's best in the world
You piss her off and
She'll give a whirl
Tough little bitch
She's got it all
One wrong look and
You are bound to fall
Next we got Shane
The blue eyed wonder
All around good guy
And mischief maker
Third is Ivan
The Russian prick
Everyone agrees he
Has a two inch dick
Red head Connor is
Next in line
He's your typical
Irish swine
Fifth is a mutt
who's name is Brad
Basic braniac
Carries a pad
Sixth we got a man
That we call Tony
We have deemed him
As one big sissy
Next is Kevin
Our Scottish guy
Plain and ignorant
Thinks he flies
Then we got Joe
He's one of a kind
Can be one big ass
But we don't mind
Lance is nothin'
But a black hole pit
Eats so much
He's always gotta sit
Justin's your typical
Ladies man
Can't really fight
But thinks he can
Alex is last
Kind and calm
He likes to read
People's palms
We're the Death Squad
So hear us well
We might come for ya
You can never tell"
Legolas stared at them in confusion.
"I regret to tell you that there are terms which I know not the meanings of."
"Don't worry," Faith told him, waving her hand dismissively. "You will."
"If you don't mind me saying, you seem to have adjusted quite well."
Indeed, they were singing and laughing as if they had been here always. They were perfectly at ease. At least it appeared that way.
"Yeah... Well... We make the best out of every situation."
"I'm still not convinced that this isn't a dream."
"Tony..."
Faith's eyes found the Italian man leaning against a pillar gazing at everything around him with a look of uncertainty.
"Is this gonna be an issue with you?"
****************************************************************************************************************************
It has been brought to my attention that in chapter four I referred to Gollum as a Schizophrenic. This is incorrect. I apologize for making seem as if I'm one of those that enjoy teasing those less fortunate than I.
In truth, I took a psychology class earlier this year and while I was writing I confused Schizophrenia with disasociative identity disorder (courtesy of Stephanie, thank you so very much).
Once again I am extremely sorry for this mistake and the fact this chapter took so long to get out. The next one is almost done and I should have it posted in a week.
On a lighter note, the Hairy Ass song... You can thank, my brother. I have no idea where he got it, but he managed to cram it into my head. Besides, it IS funny.
BYE