Chapter Ten: Everything to Gain

Mitsui warily parted the curtains and peered outside. It was still dark outside and the street in front of their house was empty. This wasn't a surprising thing, for it was only 4:00 in the morning. It was surprising, however, that Mitsui was up at this hour. Mitsui rubbed his eyes and yawned. He had been awake until 11 only to wake up unceremoniously at 4. Unlike all the other times when he would wake up at around 7, still sleepy and negotiating for 5 or 10 more minutes of sleep, this one was different. His eyes just opened as if waking up from a bad dream and he felt like he could never go back to sleep again.

It was annoying, but it was happening a whole lot during these past few days. Mitsui rubbed his eyes again. "You have to stop waking up so early!" he scolded himself out loud, his voice being muffled by another yawn. He took another look outside. It was so early, that there were still stars glittering the sky.

" Somebody told me that when a couple kisses below a blanket of stars, the stars act as witnesses to the couple's love and they help the couple overcome and difficulties in their relationship."

Mitsui shook the thought away. His mind had annoyingly been reminding him of what happened the past 2 weeks. One scene was clear in his mind. He was walking away and he had his back to Miyagi, but he could see the hurt in the other boy's eyes. Did he cry? Yes, he could see it in his mind's eye.

Mitsui bit his lip. Why did he have to walk away?

Because he had to. Why? What would he have done anyway? Held Miyagi in his arms and whisper comforting words into his ear? Tell Miyagi he loves—

Mitsui shivered involuntarily. It was the kind of shiver he got when the word "love" was mentioned. That was the case with the guys he dated before. After they had sex, they would be lying there in bed peacefully until the other guy starts talking about the possibility of a relationship and love. Yes, love. That would bring Mitsui the shivers, and the shivers were the signal for Mitsui to walk away. Walk away and never look back.

Why did he walk away from Miyagi then? Miyagi mentioned of no such things. But then, there was Hideki. Maybe it was pride, but Mitsui never dated any guy who Hideki got to first.

"I'll tell you why," Hideki said, sneering. "Mitsui is stupid, but not stupid enough to want trash thrown by others."

Mitsui remembered what had happened the day before. What Hideki said was true. He didn't like hand-me-downs. But it was unfair to Miyagi. Mitsui knew how painful the whole experience must have been for Miyagi. It was like…

What happened to you before...

Then Mitsui allowed himself to bring back the hurt he felt long ago. The first time he fell in love (Mitsui shivered) and how his heart was broken. It was in the cafeteria too, with lots of people milling around, peacefully eating their meals. He could see it in his mind perfectly. Hideki was there with his gang laughing heartily. He could see – wait! It wasn't himself that he could see approaching Hideki, but Miyagi. Miyagi stopping a few inches away from Hideki's table, Miyagi taking all the insults and Miyagi running out of the cafeteria on the verge of tears.

Not him, but Miyagi.

Mitsui stopped. Something was wrong. He put his hand over his chest. His heart wasn't beating fast as it usually did whenever he would have a flashback about Hideki. It fact, he suddenly realized that he wasn't hurting. No, there was no pain and as he put his hand on his cheek, there were no silent tears falling.

When he tried to reminisce again, it was still Miyagi. Not him, but Miyagi.

Ever since that day when Hideki dumped him, these flashbacks haunted him. He would feel the utmost pain in his chest, which would reduce him to tears and left him feeling cold. He hated every guy he dated. All they had were happy thoughts about love (Mitsui shivered again) and a relationship. No one knew what he went through and they didn't care. He hated them all. He dumped them and made them cry, but he did not feel justified. All their petty pain was no match for what he felt that fateful day. He kept on hurting others but he never knew how much he was hurting himself. He hated them, hurt them. He wanted them to feel the pain he himself felt that day, but no one ever did. Their pains passed while he was still aching.

Wait! Someone DID know. Someone felt the same pain you did, even more so.

Suddenly, it all came to him. Mitsui's eyes widen as he finally realized what Miyagi had done. "Oh shit…" Mitsui whispered. "I was such a jerk."

With that, he ran downstairs, only pausing to feel his chest once more – no, no pain there –. He ran straight for the phone. As he dialed his number, he looked at the clock. 5:15 a.m. someone should be up by now.

After two rings, someone finally picked up the other end of the line. "Hello?" Mitsui was greeted by a woman's sleepy voice.

"Ah Miyagi san! I'm sorry for calling at this early hour." Mitsui apologized. "Can I talk to Ryota? This is Mitsui Hisashi."

Mrs. Miyagi's voice sounded even more tired with her reply. "Hisashi kun? I'm afraid that's not possible. He's been inside his room ever since yesterday, moping. Did you know what happened to him?"

"I have a slight idea," Mitsui lied. 'You idiot!' he scolded himself internally. 'It's all your fault!'

"He hasn't eaten a thing and I'm worried about him," Mrs. Miyagi continued.

Mitsui bit his lip. "Can you get him to at least eat something? And can you please get him to school today? It's important."

"I don't know Hisashi kun," Mrs. Miyagi replied. "Why?"

"Because it will solve his problems. Please Miyagi san. I really need this."

Mrs. Miyagi yawned. "Okay okay Hisashi kun. I'll try. Really, that boy's old enough to face his problems instead of hiding from it."

Mitsui didn't comment on Mrs. Miyagi's last line. "Thanks Miyagi san. Again, I'm sorry for calling so early."

"I don't mind Hisashi kun. In fact, I wish Ryota would wake up this early too. He's always late for class and all…"

Mitsui put down the phone. As he did, he heard noises from the kitchen. His parents must be up by now.

"Yosh!" he said, with clear determination. He had to get ready for school. There were many things to do today.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

"Good morning Mitsui kun!"

Mitsui frowned at the sight. Hideki was leaning against his (Mitsui's) locker with a smug look on his face. "Aren't you going to greet me a good morning too?"

"Go away Hideki, before I punch you." Mitsui stopped and waited for Hideki to leave him alone, but the latter didn't move.

"My my, somebody woke up at the wrong side of the bed." Hideki commented, eyeing the dark circles under Mitsui's eyes. "You apparently didn't sleep well last night? Why? Because no one was with you?"

Mitsui glared at Hideki. "Will you get the hell off my locker? I need to get to class."

"You saw I did to Miyagi kun in the cafeteria yesterday right?" Hideki laughed and crossed his arms over his chest. "Reminds you of something doesn't it? I can't believe there's someone even more stupid than you, Mitsui kun."

"Ryota's not stupid," Mitsui hissed. "You have no idea how brave he was by doing that." And he himself didn't have a clue, until that morning. Now that he knew Miyagi's motives, he wasn't going to allow Hideki to belittle Miyagi.

"Aww, Mitsui kun is defending Miyagi kun? How sweet. I was wrong after all. You ARE stupid enough to want trash thrown by others!"

That's when Mitsui punch Hideki. Mitsui watched, with pleasure, as his fist connected with Hideki's cheek. As he watched Hideki fall to the ground, a thought came to mind.

You promised Anzai sensei you'll never fight again.

But Mitsui shook the thought away. Anzai sensei would understand and he DID warn Hideki and it was Hideki who didn't heed his warning.

"Why you," Hideki stood up and dusted off his pants. He took a step towards Mitsui, about to retaliate, when he stopped as he looked at the point near Mitsui's left ear. Mitsui turned his head a little bit and saw that Hotta and the others had come to his defense.

"This isn't over yet Mitsui kun. Remember that." With that, Hideki turned and ran away.

"Wow, look at him go!" Hotta laughed as Hideki turned at the first corner.

'You're right Hideki,' Mitsui thought. 'This ISN'T over yet.' Remembering what he came here for, Mitsui opened his locker. A horrible smell assaulted his nostrils. One of these days he will find out what horrible rotting thing was in his locker. He hesitated before he put his hand into the locker and rummaged around in it. He tried not to think of what gooey stuff his hand would come across and instead, tried to find what he was looking for.

"Yes!" Mitsui pulled out his hand and opened his fist. In his palm was a crumpled piece of paper and a few streaks of greenish blobs.

Hotta wrinkled his nose. "What in the world is in your locker? A bacteria culture?"

"Maybe," Mitsui said as he opened the paper. He smiled when he found what he was looking for. As he looked away from the paper, he was met with inquiring stares from his gang members.

"Guys, no matter what stupidity I do this day, please don't disown me." Mitsui said. He meant it as a joke, but because of his serious tone, his gang members looked at him with concern

"Don't worry Mitchan," Hotta said, smiling. "You'll always be one of us."

Mitsui smiled too. "Thanks guys. I'm sorry, but I have to go." With that he ran off in a hurry, but still catching Hotta's last remark.

"Good luck sportsman!"

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"Ryota, you look terrible."

Miyagi groaned and turned his face away from Ayako's scrutiny. They were in the classroom right now. The teacher didn't show up for some reason and the whole class was mingling around the room and talking. Ayako was seated on top of the desk behind Miyagi while Miyagi was slumped in his seat. "I didn't even want to go to school today but my mom threatened to drag me all the way here in my pajamas if I didn't get my butt out of bed."

Ayako's eyes twinkled. "You wear pajamas?"

Miyagi sighed and was about to ignore Ayako's comment when he realized what a jerk he was. Ayako was only trying to comfort him and he hadn't been paying any attention to her for the last 2 weeks.

Ayako saw Miyagi's frown. "It'll be alright Ryota. As you said, you'll forget about this whole thing."

"Maybe I should quit the team," Miyagi suggested.

"You're doing no such thing!" Ayako scolded. "Don't show Mitsui that you were affected. It'll give him a sense of power. Don't let him win Ryota."

"But…it's just that…"

Ayako gave Miyagi a small smile. "Do you love him?"

"What?" Miyagi asked, surprised at Ayako's question.

"You must love him a lot. Tell me Ryota, have you thought about me at all these past few days?"

"Of course I have! I –" Miyagi stopped and looked at Ayako guiltily. Before the bet, when Ayako was pretty much his whole life, he'd often wonder if Ayako knew about his feelings for her. Now he knew that she knew all along.

"You're my friend, Ryota. That's why I didn't say anything about your feelings for me back then was because I didn't want to be the one who hurt you, because love hurts, Ryota. I'm sure you know that now." She placed her hand on Miyagi's shoulder. She wished she could do something to make Miyagi feel better. If Miyagi still loved her, she would have done what she could but she knew that right now, what Miyagi wanted was Mitsui. Ayako made a mental note to herself to whack some sense into Mitsui later during practice.

Several people screamed as a sudden high-pitched screeching nearly deafened them. Ayako looked up and saw that someone had turn on the speaker system and the speaker located on top of the blackboard had been activated.

"Hello? Can anybody hear me?"

Miyagi's eyes widened as he recognized the voice. He looked at Ayako and his suspicions were confirmed. The voice belonged to Mitsui. They heard the sound of paper being unfolded before the voice continued,

"You guys probably know who I am right? I mean, since we all had a "thing" back then. I just want to say that I'm terribly sorry for all the things I've done. I wasn't think about anybody other than myself. Right. I'm a heartless bastard, an annoying scum and I have no idea how you guys could have liked me at all. I played with people's hearts, hopes and dreams. It's all a result of my sadistic personality and low self-esteem that I cover up my inadequacies by hurting others."

Miyagi gasped. It was the speech he had made for Mitsui! Miyagi looked at Ayako and she nodded. She recognized the words she added into the speech. Behind them, a guy who Mitsui used to date giggled. All the rest of their classmates started murmuring.

They heard the sound of paper being crumbled. "Listen, I thought that hurting others was justified by the pain I felt before. But then, someone who meant so much to me was hurt because of me and I never want him to get hurt again. You know who you are, and I – hey!"

Several people shrieked as the screeching returned, this time there was a muffled sound, like the microphone dropping. Then they heard the principal's voice. "What are you doing here?"

"Wait!" Mitsui was saying, "Look, if you gimme a chance –" then there was silence. It seems as if Mitsui was cut off.

Ayako smiled. "What do you think that was?"

Miyagi shrugged. "I don't care."

"He'll probably get detention," Ayako persisted.

"Good for him then," Miyagi grumbled slumping even more on his seat.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

Mitsui glared at the clock, as if hypnotizing it to move faster. He was in detention and the last 5 minutes of "out" time seemed like forever.

"Jeez, if that old guy only waited a minute or two." He was talking about the principal, of course. He drummed his fingers on his desk. It should have been his moment!

An old professor peered into the room – he was the one in charged of the detention hall. He had a mug of coffee in one hand. Mitsui suspected that the professor was eager to retire to the lounge.

"I think it's about time anyway Mitsui kun," he said, looking at the clock. "You may go now."

Mitsui was about to thank his sensei when the latter vanished. Mitsui sweatdropped. Teachers here flee from classes even faster than students. He took his bag and slung it around his shoulders. Maybe he would catch Miyagi on the gym during practice. Maybe they can talk and put it all behind them. Then things would be like the way it was before?

The way it was before? Was that all he wants?

Mitsui shook his head. First he had to get Miyagi to forgive him. From there, he didn't know what else to do.

Mitsui was about to take a step when he stopped. On the doorway of the room, peering out into the empty hallway was Miyagi Ryota.

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C&C?

Okay so one scene here took 3 pages long so I decided to cut it and save the ending for the next chapter. Once again, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review. It doesn't matter if you read this fic 3-5 months from when it was published. Reviews are still very very very much welcomed. Anyway how should it end? Happy ending? And what about Hideki?