Two

"Are you sure you don't mind? It's two weeks, after all, a lot to ask –"

"Kathy, it's no trouble at all. Michael will be thrilled, and Eli is as low maintenance as it gets when it comes to teenage boys."

Kathy had to chuckle at Miranda Phillips' words. Though he now sported an introverted teenage attitude, Eli was not a troublemaker by any means. She squeezed her friend's arm gratefully as they turned their attention back to the match their sons were playing in.

Miranda was Kathy's closest friend in Rome, just as her son Michael was Eli's closest friend. Miranda's husband worked at the American embassy, and Miranda worked with Kathy at the American Women's Association in Rome; in fact, it had been Miranda who'd recruited Kathy there after Eli got seriously into soccer.

They cheered as their sons' team scored a goal just before the first half of the game ended. Sam, Miranda's husband, turned to the two women and asked, "You two want your usual?"

Miranda nodded, and Sam and Elliot walked away towards the refreshments stand on the other side of the field, where a line was already forming.

"So, are you all set for tomorrow?"

Kathy nodded. "I think so. Flight's booked, hotel room secured, and the kids know we're coming."

"Will one of them pick you up at the airport?"

"No, we'll be arriving in New York pretty late at night. We're all getting together for brunch at Maureen's house the next day."

Miranda smiled softly at her. "How excited are you to see those twins? And I don't mean yours, I mean your grandsons."

Kathy's face lit up in a radiant smile. "I'm counting the minutes. Maureen sends me pictures and videos practically every day, but it's not the same. I can't believe they're three years old already!"

Miranda nodded. Seeing the tears welling in Kathy's eyes, she rubbed her back and asked, "Is there something else making you emotional?"

Kathy sighed. Miranda was a very perceptive woman, and it annoyed her sometimes, but now, Kathy felt almost relieved. She had to say something.

"There's another reason why we're going back to the states besides Elliot's work."

Miranda just nodded, waiting for her to continue.

"There's a ceremony we're going to that evening, after brunch with the kids. One of Elliot's old colleagues – his old partner, in fact – is being honored. Something about women in law enforcement. She's become the captain of his old unit."

"Oh, that's nice," said Miranda. Then she looked more closely at Kathy's face, the way Kathy couldn't meet her eye. "Or not?"

"It's just…" Kathy chose her words very carefully. There was no way she could talk about everything; though she trusted Miranda, they were in a public setting and their husbands would soon join them again. But Kathy had to talk about this in some way with someone objective. "She – his old partner – used to be a big part of our lives, not just Elliot's but the kids' too. After Elliot left the unit, we…well, we lost touch. It's been ten years now…I just feel so guilty, letting it go this long…"

She still couldn't meet Miranda's eyes, because Miranda would be able to see there was a lot she was holding back. Hell, she probably already suspected that. But Miranda had enough tact not to address it.

"Well, I'd say going to her ceremony is a good start," said Miranda. "Sounds like a big deal, and there will probably be a lot of people there from different points in her life. I know that I've had my fair share of friends become acquaintances due to living abroad for so long. Even with today's technology, it's tough. Hopefully, you and Elliot can try to put that across in a way she'll understand."

Kathy nodded, pressing her lips together before giving Miranda what she hoped was a thankful smile. Under so many other circumstances, Miranda's words would console someone and even give them hope. Ignoring the nauseous feeling in her stomach, Kathy determinedly changed the subject.

When Kathy woke from a restless sleep, Elliot wasn't in bed with her. Looking at her phone, she saw that it was past two in the morning. Getting up, she tiptoed out of the bedroom and down the hall. There was one light on in the kitchen, and it shone down on Elliot in a way that reminded Kathy of prison interrogation scenes in movies. He sat at the kitchen table, hunched over a notepad, his pen shaking restlessly in his hand.

"Elliot?"

His head jerked up almost violently, and his expression was a dead ringer for the way Richard would look when Kathy would catch him trying to sneak a cookie from the kitchen at night.

"What are you doing up?" she asked, coming closer.

Elliot opened his mouth a few times, his eyes scrambling for what to say. Suddenly, he seemed to give up. He lowered his gaze back to the notepad and sighed. "I…I still haven't written anything…"

Kathy bit back a sigh, knowing exactly what he was talking about.

The day after Elliot had e-mailed their official RSVP's to Olivia's ceremony, he'd gotten a request to make a speech introducing Olivia before she officially accepted the award. Elliot had politely declined, and Kathy knew a big reason was Elliot's absolute loathing of public speaking. He'd been persuaded to try to make a toast at Maureen's wedding, and that was now something the family could laugh about.

But Kathy could see how it troubled Elliot to turn it down. "I still want to tell her how proud I am, and how happy I am for her," he had said.

And Kathy couldn't blame him for that because she felt the exact same way. So, she'd suggested he write a letter. He could give it to her during a free moment at the ceremony, since she probably wouldn't be able to set aside a large chunk of time just for them when everyone was literally there for her. Plus, there was a very good chance that Elliot would either choke on his words or say the wrong thing if he relied on just speaking in person to say what he wanted to say.

Now, it was the night before their return to New York, and Elliot was still stuck on what to say.

Tired, restless, and just wanting to get this over with, Kathy pulled out a chair and sat beside him. "Alright…I can help, if you want."

Elliot looked at her and nodded; he was clearly, too, and he was ready to try anything.

So, without discussing or agreeing to it, Kathy began to dictate and Elliot began to write. She spoke as much for herself as she spoke for Elliot (or, rather, what she wanted Elliot to say). It started out with a heartfelt congratulations and pride for how far Olivia had come. Then came an apology for how long it had been since they'd been in touch, explaining that they were now based in Rome and didn't come back the states often.

Then, Kathy entered into more personal territory, touching on the relationship she'd had with Elliot. Citing how far she'd risen in the ranks without him and Elliot's job in Rome, Kathy pointed out how they'd held each other back from going as far as they could go and how what they were to each other was never real. How, if she had a man in her life, Elliot hoped that she was happy and he treated her the way she deserved.

The letter finished with another congratulations and a Godspeed that sounded as final as she could make it. Through it all, Elliot had written down her words without making an objection. How he felt about the words she'd chosen Kathy didn't know; she'd kept her eyes on either her folded hands or Elliot's dominant hand writing.

"Okay, now that's settled," said Kathy, as firmly as she could while yawning and getting up from her chair. "Come to bed, we have a long day tomorrow."

Elliot nodded, reaching for the envelope he'd had laid out on the table. "Yeah, right behind you."

Kathy turned and began to walk back to the bedroom. She looked over her shoulder once at Elliot. From this angle his back was to her, and he was bent over the table and appeared to be writing. Concluding that he was addressing the envelope, Kathy turned her head back around and went back into her bedroom.

P.S. But in a parallel universe, it will always be you and I.

Elliot couldn't finish this letter without something that came from him and him alone. It was the very least that Olivia deserved. He convinced himself that he agreed with the majority of what Kathy had dictated to him. Clearly, he'd held her back seeing how far she'd risen without him. And even though it made every cell in his body clench, if Olivia truly was happy with a man who wasn't afraid to love her the way she deserved to be, then who was he to say anything?

He folded the letter and sealed it in the envelope before he could change his mind about what he'd added. It was true, after all. Every day that he'd lived without her for the past ten years, there'd be at least one moment (usually more than a few) where he'd imagined that parallel universe. Where he'd never left her, where he was by her side, either here in Rome or back in New York or any place he happened to be.

In that parallel universe, they were always free to be everything to each other. And, whatever happened at the ceremony, he could comfort himself with that parallel universe again – though it got hollower and ephemeral with each day that passed.