Disclaimer: If only....Lyrics used are not mine.
A/N: It's been a couple days, I know. Sorry. I would have updated sooner, I was just lazy and stuff. Yeah.
Reviews:
Kobe-Mac: Yes, it is Ronnie. I don't really know why I used him, I just didn't want to create some random guy.
Lara: Um, well, not quite, but it's a nice thought.
luvurflyingmonkey123: Hippie Stars Wars children were nice.
Tanguay40: It's not winding down too quickly. There is a little bit of ways to go. The following chapters won't make anyone happy, though. I don't think.
Chapter 12: Wind Up
(Note: This is a journal entry of Lizzie's the NEXT summer)
Journal~ June 1st, 2004
I saw him today. Yes, him. The only him it could be. It was not at all what you're expecting.
As, you, journal, know, I have yet to officially walk through those doors since it happened. I just haven't been able to, there is too much emotional technicalities that I need to deal with.
With the departure of Parker, it just hasn't been the same. With the departure of my talking to Parker it hasn't been the same. I was stupid and now I regret it all, but there isn't anything I can do. It isn't like she's still at that school she go moved into, she's gone. Forever, most likely.
It still really upsets me. The fact that she did **that** and then continued to do it. And I feel so freaking childish because from the day I found out, I disowned her. I shouldn't have done that if she really meant that much to me. It wasn't the right reaction to have. I should have stuck by her side. I should have, but I didn't.
Anyways, back to the main purpose of this entry in which I loathe in my newly found pathetic-ness. So, as I said, I haven't been to the pool all summer, which is true, I haven't. But, today, I wanted to take a walk, and I live only a couple blocks away from the pool and inadvertently ended up there. I don't really know, I guess my subconscious wanted to go. It went. It shanked at the last minute. I was standing outside, right next to the concession stand, I was intending to get a bottle of water or something for the rest of the walk, but then, I saw those curls. Those curls could only belong to one person, and they did. It was Gordo. He was so close to me, yet not. He was walking into the concession stand. As far as I know, he didn't see me. Which is good. To say the least. I almost said his name, I was so close, and then, I stopped myself. Those insecurities of mine came back and I stopped. Maybe I shouldn't have stopped. Oh, well, I digress. There isn't anything I can do now.
I was watching that crappy Marieh Carey movie, you know Glitter. Yeah, it sucks, but I still tear up a little when I first saw it. Not the point, she sings this song at the end, when she finds out Dice dies. The one that she wrote the words and he did the music, but they weren't with each other. Ooh, freaky. Yeah, right. Anyways, it kind of hits home with Gordo and all.
~*You're with me
Til the bitter end
What we had transcends
This experience
Too painful to
Talk about
So I'll hold it in
Til my heart can mend
And be brave enough to love again
A place in time
Still belongs to us
Stays preserved in my mind
In the memories there is solace
Never too far away
I won't let time erase
One bit of yesterday
Cause I have learned that
Nobody can take your place
Though we can never be
I'll keep you close to me
When I remember
Glittering lights
Incandescent eyes
Still preserved
In my mind
In the memories I'll find solace
Never too far away
I won't let time erase
One bit of yesterday
And I have learned that
Nobody can take your place
Though we can never be
I'll keep you close to me
And I'll remember
A place in time
Still belongs to us
Stays preserved in my mind
In the memories there is solace
Never too far away
I won't let time erase
One bit of yesterday
Cause I have learned that
Nobody can take your place
And though we can never be
I'll always think of you and me
Always remember
Love
You're never too far *~
A/N: All right, class participation. Review and tell me, which of the three C's you prefer: Campus, Concert, or Camping
A/N: It's been a couple days, I know. Sorry. I would have updated sooner, I was just lazy and stuff. Yeah.
Reviews:
Kobe-Mac: Yes, it is Ronnie. I don't really know why I used him, I just didn't want to create some random guy.
Lara: Um, well, not quite, but it's a nice thought.
luvurflyingmonkey123: Hippie Stars Wars children were nice.
Tanguay40: It's not winding down too quickly. There is a little bit of ways to go. The following chapters won't make anyone happy, though. I don't think.
Chapter 12: Wind Up
(Note: This is a journal entry of Lizzie's the NEXT summer)
Journal~ June 1st, 2004
I saw him today. Yes, him. The only him it could be. It was not at all what you're expecting.
As, you, journal, know, I have yet to officially walk through those doors since it happened. I just haven't been able to, there is too much emotional technicalities that I need to deal with.
With the departure of Parker, it just hasn't been the same. With the departure of my talking to Parker it hasn't been the same. I was stupid and now I regret it all, but there isn't anything I can do. It isn't like she's still at that school she go moved into, she's gone. Forever, most likely.
It still really upsets me. The fact that she did **that** and then continued to do it. And I feel so freaking childish because from the day I found out, I disowned her. I shouldn't have done that if she really meant that much to me. It wasn't the right reaction to have. I should have stuck by her side. I should have, but I didn't.
Anyways, back to the main purpose of this entry in which I loathe in my newly found pathetic-ness. So, as I said, I haven't been to the pool all summer, which is true, I haven't. But, today, I wanted to take a walk, and I live only a couple blocks away from the pool and inadvertently ended up there. I don't really know, I guess my subconscious wanted to go. It went. It shanked at the last minute. I was standing outside, right next to the concession stand, I was intending to get a bottle of water or something for the rest of the walk, but then, I saw those curls. Those curls could only belong to one person, and they did. It was Gordo. He was so close to me, yet not. He was walking into the concession stand. As far as I know, he didn't see me. Which is good. To say the least. I almost said his name, I was so close, and then, I stopped myself. Those insecurities of mine came back and I stopped. Maybe I shouldn't have stopped. Oh, well, I digress. There isn't anything I can do now.
I was watching that crappy Marieh Carey movie, you know Glitter. Yeah, it sucks, but I still tear up a little when I first saw it. Not the point, she sings this song at the end, when she finds out Dice dies. The one that she wrote the words and he did the music, but they weren't with each other. Ooh, freaky. Yeah, right. Anyways, it kind of hits home with Gordo and all.
~*You're with me
Til the bitter end
What we had transcends
This experience
Too painful to
Talk about
So I'll hold it in
Til my heart can mend
And be brave enough to love again
A place in time
Still belongs to us
Stays preserved in my mind
In the memories there is solace
Never too far away
I won't let time erase
One bit of yesterday
Cause I have learned that
Nobody can take your place
Though we can never be
I'll keep you close to me
When I remember
Glittering lights
Incandescent eyes
Still preserved
In my mind
In the memories I'll find solace
Never too far away
I won't let time erase
One bit of yesterday
And I have learned that
Nobody can take your place
Though we can never be
I'll keep you close to me
And I'll remember
A place in time
Still belongs to us
Stays preserved in my mind
In the memories there is solace
Never too far away
I won't let time erase
One bit of yesterday
Cause I have learned that
Nobody can take your place
And though we can never be
I'll always think of you and me
Always remember
Love
You're never too far *~
A/N: All right, class participation. Review and tell me, which of the three C's you prefer: Campus, Concert, or Camping