Healing
Sequel to "Confrontation". I do not own any part of Charmed; I just write about it.
"What are we going to do?" Fiona, Guardian of Fire, demanded harshly.
The other Guardians looked at her in surprise, "About what?" Undine, Guardian of Water, countered with an uneasy look in her eyes.
"Gabriel. How will we handle his loss?" Fiona continued mercilessly.
"There's not much we can do for him," Azar, Guardian of Spirit, mentioned, "I suppose we'll let him live his life."
"That's not the point," Fiona pointed out angrily, "Gabriel used to be one of us, we need to stick by him, now more than ever. You know the history as well as I do."
"Just because it's happened before doesn't mean it'll happen again," Undine countered, "Don't get me wrong, I like Gabriel. But if we continue to involve ourselves in his life, don't we risk bringing more evil down upon him, evil he's not strong enough to face anymore?"
"Gerald should really be here," Kuzan, Guardian of Destiny, muttered.
"His new duties are still taking up too much time for him to have joined us. Give him a few weeks, and then he'll be steadier in his position," Azar replied.
"What are we going to do about Gabriel?" Fiona interrupted, "He's saved our lives more than once, and we owe him anything we can give him."
As one, the group turned to Mortanos, who sighed. He put his hand to his face, as if seeking strength in that gesture, before saying, "For now, all we do is watch. IF he starts showing the signs like the others did, then and only then will we intervene. Until such signs appear, Gabriel is for all intents and purposes not our concern."
***
As the sun crested the horizon, bathing the city of San Francisco in light, the three sisters were in the living room. They'd been up all night, and there was only one topic they were discussing.
"I just can't believe it," Paige muttered in disbelief.
"Neither can I," Piper confessed, "Gabriel, no longer the Guardian of Life. It just." she trailed off, unable to properly articulate what she felt.
Phoebe shook her head, "According to Mortanos, Gabriel destroyed his link to life in order to stop Angel. When he did that, he utterly removed any chance of him ever being Guardian of Life again."
"How's he doing?" Paige asked. "Is he upset or anything?"
Phoebe looked slightly worried, "I've talked to him several times, without much success."
"He won't talk?" Piper surmised.
Phoebe shook her head, "No, he talks, but."
"But what?" Paige pressed.
Phoebe continued, "He seems .well, happy. He doesn't seem to be depressed or angry. He's around a lot more, and we honestly are glad he's here. But still."
"Still what?" Piper demanded.
Phoebe sighed, "Sometimes, when he doesn't think I'm looking, I see.a difference. Part of me wonders if he's hiding what he's really feeling. I mean, when Cole became mortal, it took him weeks to adjust, and he still had problems. Gabriel adjusted way too quickly."
"Yeah, but if you think about it, maybe Gabriel was glad it happened," Paige pointed out, "I mean, Gabriel had a lot of pain and responsibility as Guardian of Life. He may really like not having to deal with that."
"I guess you're right," Phoebe said dubiously. "Maybe I'm just imagining things."
At that moment, Gabriel came down the stairs, chased by Melinda. "Can't catch me," Gabriel shouted as he ran past them.
"Yes I can," Melinda shrieked. Piper ducked as she did a flying jump over her without breaking pace.
"Don't run in the house," Piper shouted.
"How are the two hellspawn doing?" Michael asked wryly as he, Leo, and Cole walked down the stairs.
"You heard them," Paige teased.
"Heard them? Children in Malaysia can probably hear them," Michael countered. "Still, it's a good sign that Gabriel can play around like that."
"We were just discussing that," Paige mentioned, "Have any of you noticed anything wrong with Gabriel."
The three men shared a glance. Cole shook his head, "I've been using every power I've got, and I can't detect a thing. He seems.normal. Except for his eyes."
Wordlessly, Phoebe took his hand. She could feel his worry and fear for their son. "You talk to him last night, did you have better luck than I did?"
"He was willing to talk to me about anything I wanted.except for the loss of his powers," Cole added, "I tried to press, but I didn't want to cause him pain by forcing him to focus on the loss."
Leo nodded, "That's a good idea. I'll tell you what, why don't I talk to him? I know I've been really busy lately, but maybe he'd be willing to open up to me. After all, I am a whitelighter, I'm used to seeing those signs."
Relief flooded Cole and Phoebe's eyes. "Thanks." Phoebe said simply.
Leo was about to respond when a scream shot out from the dining room. Cole and the others turned and sprinted in, and then skidded to a stop.
A demon was standing in the dining room. Gabriel was unconscious on the ground, and the demon was slowly choking Melinda, who was kicking and hitting with all her might. With a yell of parental rage, Piper gestured, and the demon stumbled back and dropped Melinda.
Cole fired an energy bolt, causing the demon to explode. He then rushed over and turned his son over. Gabriel was out like a light, and blood was dripping from his nose. "LEO!" Cole shouted.
Leo ran over and began to heal Gabriel. Within a few seconds, Gabriel opened his eyes, and said, "What happened?"
"A demon attacked," Melinda explained as she tried to catch her breath. "You tried to stop it, but it knocked you unconscious. Then it turned on me."
"I see," Gabriel said softly as he stood up. "I'm glad you're alright cousin."
"Eh, it'll take more than a choking to stop me," Melinda countered.
Gabriel smiled, "I'll bet it would. Dad, I'm feeling kind of tired, can I go lie down."
"Sure, go ahead," Cole mentioned, "Do you want me to go with you?"
Gabriel shook his head, "No, I should be alright." He then turned and left the room.
"That was strange," Cole commented.
"Not like Gabriel at all, and that worries me," Phoebe continued.
"Let him sleep, and then I'll talk to him," Leo promised.
They nodded, and then went back to discussing the demon attack. They were so preoccupied they didn't notice Gabriel touch a gem on his neck. There was a slight flash, and then Gabriel shimmered out.
"How did this demon know that Gabriel was weakened?" Piper wondered.
"I don't know, maybe he got lucky. Or." Michael began, but trailed off as Fiona appeared in the room.
"Fiona, what are you doing here? Are you looking for Gabriel or Gerald?" Piper asked in surprise.
Fiona shook her head, and said softly, "We need to talk."
***
Gabriel reappeared in a plush business office. Tasteful paintings and vases were at strategic locations, as well as a few bookcases and chairs. Gabriel slowly walked over, picked up a vase, and threw it as hard as he could at the wall. As it shattered, Gabriel turned and grabbed another one. For several minutes, Gabriel destroyed the room with more and more violent motions. Finally, Gabriel sank to his knees and stared down at his hands.
"You know, if I'd known when I gave you that necklace that you'd use it to come here and trash my office, I might have reconsidered," a voice said from the door. Gabriel did not look up as Gerald walked into the room. He knelt down in front of Gabriel, put his hand on Gabriel's shoulder, and asked, "What happened?"
"A demon attacked, and I was knocked unconscious," Gabriel said shortly. "If it wasn't from Melinda, I'd probably be dead."
"And you're mad at the demon?" Gerald asked.
"No," Gabriel said shortly.
"Ah.you're mad at Melinda, for having to save you," Gerald surmised.
Gabriel looked up, and yelled, "I used to be able to destroy any demon that dared to cross my path, and now LOOK at me! I'm, I'm.pathetic!!!"
"That's not why you're mad," Gerald said.
"What do you know," Gabriel said crossly.
Gerald laughed, "Remember who you're talking to. I share genes with you, and I know your father. I probably know you better than you know yourself."
"Then what do you think is bothering me?" Gabriel asked.
"You are used to doing the protecting, not being the protected," Gerald remarked simply, "and it drives you nuts that you can't protect them. And then there's."
"I know what you're going to say, save your breath," Gabriel interrupted.
"We need to tell them," Gerald mentioned.
Gabriel glared at Gerald, "Absolutely not."
"Why, they deserve to know," Gerald demanded.
"It'll make them worry more," Gabriel said, "and they're worried enough as it is,"
Gerald sighed, "They're your parents, it's their job to worry."
"You promised to keep my secret, are you going to break that promise?" Gabriel requested softly.
A pained look came over Gerald, and he said uncomfortably, "No.I made you a promise, and I will keep that promise. But I wish you'd tell them."
"I won't," Gabriel said firmly.
Gerald shook his head mournfully, "So be it. Now, let me get you back before your parents discover you're missing."
Gabriel slowly stood. Gerald took his hand, and they both faded out. ***
"What do you we need to talk about?" Cole asked.
Fiona sighed, "Gabriel."
"What about Gabriel?" Michael wondered, "is there some repercussions from his revocation of his link to life or something?"
Fiona remarked, "I'm not actually supposed to be here. In point of fact, I was ordered not to do what I'm about to do."
"Who ordered you to do that?" Paige demanded.
"The other Guardians. They felt our continued presence would draw evil's eyes upon Gabriel, who is no longer able to defend himself. But I just can't keep quiet. Gabriel has saved my life more than once, and I owe it to him, to all of you, to tell the truth." Fiona replied.
"The truth about what?" Leo remarked curiously.
Fiona slowly sat down, and began her story, "You remember back when Gabriel was chosen, how we said there had been other candidates tested," when the group nodded, Fiona continued, "Well, what you don't know is that some of those candidates actually passed, and became Guardians."
"What!" the sisters shouted.
Fiona nodded, "Gabriel is not the first Guardian of Life, he's actually the third,"
"What happened to the others?" Cole demanded as the group tried to adjust to this astonishing statement.
Fiona looked uncomfortable as she added, "They became Guardians, and worked well for several years. But sooner of later, they severed their link to life. The first one was an accident, and we hadn't realized what he'd done for several months. But the second one did it intentionally, for reasons that aren't important. What's important is what happened to them."
"What do you mean?" Phoebe practically shouted.
"They died, committed suicide to be more specific," Fiona stated softly.
"What!" the group screamed.
"They couldn't handle the loss of their powers," Fiona continued defensively, "They became depressed, couldn't sleep, lost weight, and sooner of later killed themselves. We don't know why, even to this day. We worked with the second one, trying to get him through it, but he still killed himself. That's why I came here today. How is Gabriel doing? Is he exhibiting signs of depression?"
Cole and Phoebe shared a look, "No, actually he's seems rather happy."
Fiona looked startled, "What? That's impossible."
"We just put it down to him being glad to be free of the responsibility," Paige said softly.
"Even so, Gabriel should be feeling some aftereffects from his loss. Are you saying he's showing no unhappiness at all?" Fiona demanded. When they nodded, she said, "I need to see him, immediately."
"Hey guys, look who I found upstairs," Gerald said as he and Gabriel walked into the room. "I thought I'd stop by and say.Fiona?" Gerald asked in astonishment. "What are you doing here?"
"I came to talk to them." Fiona began, but trailed off as she gazed at Gabriel. "Gabriel, are you feeling alright?"
"Fine, why?" Gabriel responded in puzzlement.
"Fiona has told us some disturbing facts, and we wanted to make sure you're alright," Cole explained.
Gabriel shrugged as Fiona gazed deeper into him, "I can't say I'll ever be happy with being powerless, but I feel fin."
Fiona whirled on Gerald and said, "Gerald, why is your power coating him,"
"What?" Gerald replied in shock.
"Did you honestly think you could fool another Guardian?" Fiona demanded harshly as the group stared at them, "I can see your power surrounding him, hiding something about him. Take it down, RIGHT NOW, or I will take it down for you."
Gerald looked at Gabriel, who shook his head, "No," Gabriel whispered.
"I'm sorry Gabriel," Gerald muttered.
"NO!" Gabriel shouted, but it was too late. Gerald gestured, and the illusion surrounding Gabriel faded. The group gasped. Deep lines marred Gabriel's face, and it was pinched tight with pain. His clothing hung around him loosely, as if he hadn't been eating well for days, and he had a haunted look in his eyes.
"My god Gabriel, what's wrong?" Phoebe asked in worry.
With a scream, Gabriel touched the necklace he wore, and vanished.
"WHAT THE HELL! I thought Gabriel was powerless," Piper stated.
"I gave Gabriel an emergency shimmering device, just in case." Gerald explained.
"Gerald, how could you keep this from us?" Cole demanded.
Gerald looked pained as he said, "I didn't want to, believe me. Gabriel made me swear to keep his secret, and I promised him. I begged him to tell you, but he refused. And I didn't want to risk betraying his trust, not now."
"What's wrong with him?" Phoebe insisted.
Gerald sighed, "I don't know. He asked me to use a spell to hide his true appearance. From what I gathered, whatever he did caused immense pain to him, pain that isn't stopping. The constant pain is paying a toll on him, as is his attempts to hide his pain from you."
"What are we going to do?" Piper asked the group.
"Someone needs to talk to him, and I think it needs to be me," Phoebe said softly.
"Why don't we all go," Cole suggested.
Phoebe shook her head, "We don't want to spook him, and I think it'd be best if only one of us goes. I spent some time with his powers, and I think I have an idea what he's missing. I have the best bet of getting through to him. Gerald, take me to wherever he went, and then leave. I'll call for you after we're done."
"I don't know," Gerald said dubiously.
"It wasn't a request," Phoebe stated firmly, and the group saw the conviction in her eyes.
Gerald looked into her face for several moments, before he nodded. He grabbed her, and they both vanished.
***
When Phoebe could see again, she saw a devastated room, with wrecked furniture strewn throughout. The door to the balcony was open, and Phoebe could see her son staring out into the night. She looked Gerald, who nodded and faded out.
Phoebe walked forward gingerly and questioned, "Gabriel?" Gabriel did not turn or move, so Phoebe added, "Son, I want to talk."
"About what?" Gabriel remarked conversationally.
"I won't pretend to understand what you've been through," Phoebe began, "but I held your powers once, so I have a better chance than anyone else to understand. I know it was difficult, and it feels weird, but you can get through this."
Gabriel laughed bitterly, "It does more than feel weird, Mother."
"Gerald told me you're still in pain," Phoebe tried, but Gabriel whirled.
"Pain doesn't even begin to describe it," Gabriel snapped, "My mind is on fire, and it takes every ounce of willpower I have not to collapse screaming. And the pain isn't diminishing, and I don't think it will ever end. So you tell me, how am I supposed to 'get through this'?"
"Tell me how to help you," Phoebe begged.
Gabriel hesitated, and then whispered, "There is one thing."
"What?" Phoebe pressed.
Tears began to trail down Gabriel's cheeks as he said, "Kill me."
"I will not." Phoebe countered.
"Mom, it hurts. I'm so tired of fighting it, and I'm so tired," Gabriel cried, "I thought I could handle it, but I'm not good enough, not strong enough. All I want is for the agony to end. Please help me end it."
Phoebe pulled Gabriel into her arms. Gabriel tried to resist, but he simply didn't have the strength. As Gabriel collapsed weeping, Phoebe rocked him back and forth and said softly, "You may not be strong enough alone, but WE are. We'll get you through this son. All of us will work, and we'll find a way to cure you. You just need to hold on, and let us help you."
Gabriel simply begged, "Help me, please." He continued to weep as Phoebe rocked and soothed him. Finally, he lost consciousness in her arms.
Phoebe looked up at the sky for guidance. She had kept him from suicide for now, but if she didn't find a solution soon, Gabriel would fall back. What was she going to do?
***
Gabriel looked around in confusion. The last thing he remembered, he was being held by his mother in his uncle's office. Yet, he now found himself in a barren landscape with plain features and an empty sky. Gabriel yelled, "HELLO!" and listened to his voice echo in the distance. "Where am I," Gabriel muttered.
"You're in a part of your mind," a new voice said softly. Gabriel whirled, and felt his heart stop. Standing in front of him was impossibility, something that just couldn't be. As the person before him refused to fade, Gabriel whispered,
"Angel."
TO BE CONTINUED.
Sequel to "Confrontation". I do not own any part of Charmed; I just write about it.
"What are we going to do?" Fiona, Guardian of Fire, demanded harshly.
The other Guardians looked at her in surprise, "About what?" Undine, Guardian of Water, countered with an uneasy look in her eyes.
"Gabriel. How will we handle his loss?" Fiona continued mercilessly.
"There's not much we can do for him," Azar, Guardian of Spirit, mentioned, "I suppose we'll let him live his life."
"That's not the point," Fiona pointed out angrily, "Gabriel used to be one of us, we need to stick by him, now more than ever. You know the history as well as I do."
"Just because it's happened before doesn't mean it'll happen again," Undine countered, "Don't get me wrong, I like Gabriel. But if we continue to involve ourselves in his life, don't we risk bringing more evil down upon him, evil he's not strong enough to face anymore?"
"Gerald should really be here," Kuzan, Guardian of Destiny, muttered.
"His new duties are still taking up too much time for him to have joined us. Give him a few weeks, and then he'll be steadier in his position," Azar replied.
"What are we going to do about Gabriel?" Fiona interrupted, "He's saved our lives more than once, and we owe him anything we can give him."
As one, the group turned to Mortanos, who sighed. He put his hand to his face, as if seeking strength in that gesture, before saying, "For now, all we do is watch. IF he starts showing the signs like the others did, then and only then will we intervene. Until such signs appear, Gabriel is for all intents and purposes not our concern."
***
As the sun crested the horizon, bathing the city of San Francisco in light, the three sisters were in the living room. They'd been up all night, and there was only one topic they were discussing.
"I just can't believe it," Paige muttered in disbelief.
"Neither can I," Piper confessed, "Gabriel, no longer the Guardian of Life. It just." she trailed off, unable to properly articulate what she felt.
Phoebe shook her head, "According to Mortanos, Gabriel destroyed his link to life in order to stop Angel. When he did that, he utterly removed any chance of him ever being Guardian of Life again."
"How's he doing?" Paige asked. "Is he upset or anything?"
Phoebe looked slightly worried, "I've talked to him several times, without much success."
"He won't talk?" Piper surmised.
Phoebe shook her head, "No, he talks, but."
"But what?" Paige pressed.
Phoebe continued, "He seems .well, happy. He doesn't seem to be depressed or angry. He's around a lot more, and we honestly are glad he's here. But still."
"Still what?" Piper demanded.
Phoebe sighed, "Sometimes, when he doesn't think I'm looking, I see.a difference. Part of me wonders if he's hiding what he's really feeling. I mean, when Cole became mortal, it took him weeks to adjust, and he still had problems. Gabriel adjusted way too quickly."
"Yeah, but if you think about it, maybe Gabriel was glad it happened," Paige pointed out, "I mean, Gabriel had a lot of pain and responsibility as Guardian of Life. He may really like not having to deal with that."
"I guess you're right," Phoebe said dubiously. "Maybe I'm just imagining things."
At that moment, Gabriel came down the stairs, chased by Melinda. "Can't catch me," Gabriel shouted as he ran past them.
"Yes I can," Melinda shrieked. Piper ducked as she did a flying jump over her without breaking pace.
"Don't run in the house," Piper shouted.
"How are the two hellspawn doing?" Michael asked wryly as he, Leo, and Cole walked down the stairs.
"You heard them," Paige teased.
"Heard them? Children in Malaysia can probably hear them," Michael countered. "Still, it's a good sign that Gabriel can play around like that."
"We were just discussing that," Paige mentioned, "Have any of you noticed anything wrong with Gabriel."
The three men shared a glance. Cole shook his head, "I've been using every power I've got, and I can't detect a thing. He seems.normal. Except for his eyes."
Wordlessly, Phoebe took his hand. She could feel his worry and fear for their son. "You talk to him last night, did you have better luck than I did?"
"He was willing to talk to me about anything I wanted.except for the loss of his powers," Cole added, "I tried to press, but I didn't want to cause him pain by forcing him to focus on the loss."
Leo nodded, "That's a good idea. I'll tell you what, why don't I talk to him? I know I've been really busy lately, but maybe he'd be willing to open up to me. After all, I am a whitelighter, I'm used to seeing those signs."
Relief flooded Cole and Phoebe's eyes. "Thanks." Phoebe said simply.
Leo was about to respond when a scream shot out from the dining room. Cole and the others turned and sprinted in, and then skidded to a stop.
A demon was standing in the dining room. Gabriel was unconscious on the ground, and the demon was slowly choking Melinda, who was kicking and hitting with all her might. With a yell of parental rage, Piper gestured, and the demon stumbled back and dropped Melinda.
Cole fired an energy bolt, causing the demon to explode. He then rushed over and turned his son over. Gabriel was out like a light, and blood was dripping from his nose. "LEO!" Cole shouted.
Leo ran over and began to heal Gabriel. Within a few seconds, Gabriel opened his eyes, and said, "What happened?"
"A demon attacked," Melinda explained as she tried to catch her breath. "You tried to stop it, but it knocked you unconscious. Then it turned on me."
"I see," Gabriel said softly as he stood up. "I'm glad you're alright cousin."
"Eh, it'll take more than a choking to stop me," Melinda countered.
Gabriel smiled, "I'll bet it would. Dad, I'm feeling kind of tired, can I go lie down."
"Sure, go ahead," Cole mentioned, "Do you want me to go with you?"
Gabriel shook his head, "No, I should be alright." He then turned and left the room.
"That was strange," Cole commented.
"Not like Gabriel at all, and that worries me," Phoebe continued.
"Let him sleep, and then I'll talk to him," Leo promised.
They nodded, and then went back to discussing the demon attack. They were so preoccupied they didn't notice Gabriel touch a gem on his neck. There was a slight flash, and then Gabriel shimmered out.
"How did this demon know that Gabriel was weakened?" Piper wondered.
"I don't know, maybe he got lucky. Or." Michael began, but trailed off as Fiona appeared in the room.
"Fiona, what are you doing here? Are you looking for Gabriel or Gerald?" Piper asked in surprise.
Fiona shook her head, and said softly, "We need to talk."
***
Gabriel reappeared in a plush business office. Tasteful paintings and vases were at strategic locations, as well as a few bookcases and chairs. Gabriel slowly walked over, picked up a vase, and threw it as hard as he could at the wall. As it shattered, Gabriel turned and grabbed another one. For several minutes, Gabriel destroyed the room with more and more violent motions. Finally, Gabriel sank to his knees and stared down at his hands.
"You know, if I'd known when I gave you that necklace that you'd use it to come here and trash my office, I might have reconsidered," a voice said from the door. Gabriel did not look up as Gerald walked into the room. He knelt down in front of Gabriel, put his hand on Gabriel's shoulder, and asked, "What happened?"
"A demon attacked, and I was knocked unconscious," Gabriel said shortly. "If it wasn't from Melinda, I'd probably be dead."
"And you're mad at the demon?" Gerald asked.
"No," Gabriel said shortly.
"Ah.you're mad at Melinda, for having to save you," Gerald surmised.
Gabriel looked up, and yelled, "I used to be able to destroy any demon that dared to cross my path, and now LOOK at me! I'm, I'm.pathetic!!!"
"That's not why you're mad," Gerald said.
"What do you know," Gabriel said crossly.
Gerald laughed, "Remember who you're talking to. I share genes with you, and I know your father. I probably know you better than you know yourself."
"Then what do you think is bothering me?" Gabriel asked.
"You are used to doing the protecting, not being the protected," Gerald remarked simply, "and it drives you nuts that you can't protect them. And then there's."
"I know what you're going to say, save your breath," Gabriel interrupted.
"We need to tell them," Gerald mentioned.
Gabriel glared at Gerald, "Absolutely not."
"Why, they deserve to know," Gerald demanded.
"It'll make them worry more," Gabriel said, "and they're worried enough as it is,"
Gerald sighed, "They're your parents, it's their job to worry."
"You promised to keep my secret, are you going to break that promise?" Gabriel requested softly.
A pained look came over Gerald, and he said uncomfortably, "No.I made you a promise, and I will keep that promise. But I wish you'd tell them."
"I won't," Gabriel said firmly.
Gerald shook his head mournfully, "So be it. Now, let me get you back before your parents discover you're missing."
Gabriel slowly stood. Gerald took his hand, and they both faded out. ***
"What do you we need to talk about?" Cole asked.
Fiona sighed, "Gabriel."
"What about Gabriel?" Michael wondered, "is there some repercussions from his revocation of his link to life or something?"
Fiona remarked, "I'm not actually supposed to be here. In point of fact, I was ordered not to do what I'm about to do."
"Who ordered you to do that?" Paige demanded.
"The other Guardians. They felt our continued presence would draw evil's eyes upon Gabriel, who is no longer able to defend himself. But I just can't keep quiet. Gabriel has saved my life more than once, and I owe it to him, to all of you, to tell the truth." Fiona replied.
"The truth about what?" Leo remarked curiously.
Fiona slowly sat down, and began her story, "You remember back when Gabriel was chosen, how we said there had been other candidates tested," when the group nodded, Fiona continued, "Well, what you don't know is that some of those candidates actually passed, and became Guardians."
"What!" the sisters shouted.
Fiona nodded, "Gabriel is not the first Guardian of Life, he's actually the third,"
"What happened to the others?" Cole demanded as the group tried to adjust to this astonishing statement.
Fiona looked uncomfortable as she added, "They became Guardians, and worked well for several years. But sooner of later, they severed their link to life. The first one was an accident, and we hadn't realized what he'd done for several months. But the second one did it intentionally, for reasons that aren't important. What's important is what happened to them."
"What do you mean?" Phoebe practically shouted.
"They died, committed suicide to be more specific," Fiona stated softly.
"What!" the group screamed.
"They couldn't handle the loss of their powers," Fiona continued defensively, "They became depressed, couldn't sleep, lost weight, and sooner of later killed themselves. We don't know why, even to this day. We worked with the second one, trying to get him through it, but he still killed himself. That's why I came here today. How is Gabriel doing? Is he exhibiting signs of depression?"
Cole and Phoebe shared a look, "No, actually he's seems rather happy."
Fiona looked startled, "What? That's impossible."
"We just put it down to him being glad to be free of the responsibility," Paige said softly.
"Even so, Gabriel should be feeling some aftereffects from his loss. Are you saying he's showing no unhappiness at all?" Fiona demanded. When they nodded, she said, "I need to see him, immediately."
"Hey guys, look who I found upstairs," Gerald said as he and Gabriel walked into the room. "I thought I'd stop by and say.Fiona?" Gerald asked in astonishment. "What are you doing here?"
"I came to talk to them." Fiona began, but trailed off as she gazed at Gabriel. "Gabriel, are you feeling alright?"
"Fine, why?" Gabriel responded in puzzlement.
"Fiona has told us some disturbing facts, and we wanted to make sure you're alright," Cole explained.
Gabriel shrugged as Fiona gazed deeper into him, "I can't say I'll ever be happy with being powerless, but I feel fin."
Fiona whirled on Gerald and said, "Gerald, why is your power coating him,"
"What?" Gerald replied in shock.
"Did you honestly think you could fool another Guardian?" Fiona demanded harshly as the group stared at them, "I can see your power surrounding him, hiding something about him. Take it down, RIGHT NOW, or I will take it down for you."
Gerald looked at Gabriel, who shook his head, "No," Gabriel whispered.
"I'm sorry Gabriel," Gerald muttered.
"NO!" Gabriel shouted, but it was too late. Gerald gestured, and the illusion surrounding Gabriel faded. The group gasped. Deep lines marred Gabriel's face, and it was pinched tight with pain. His clothing hung around him loosely, as if he hadn't been eating well for days, and he had a haunted look in his eyes.
"My god Gabriel, what's wrong?" Phoebe asked in worry.
With a scream, Gabriel touched the necklace he wore, and vanished.
"WHAT THE HELL! I thought Gabriel was powerless," Piper stated.
"I gave Gabriel an emergency shimmering device, just in case." Gerald explained.
"Gerald, how could you keep this from us?" Cole demanded.
Gerald looked pained as he said, "I didn't want to, believe me. Gabriel made me swear to keep his secret, and I promised him. I begged him to tell you, but he refused. And I didn't want to risk betraying his trust, not now."
"What's wrong with him?" Phoebe insisted.
Gerald sighed, "I don't know. He asked me to use a spell to hide his true appearance. From what I gathered, whatever he did caused immense pain to him, pain that isn't stopping. The constant pain is paying a toll on him, as is his attempts to hide his pain from you."
"What are we going to do?" Piper asked the group.
"Someone needs to talk to him, and I think it needs to be me," Phoebe said softly.
"Why don't we all go," Cole suggested.
Phoebe shook her head, "We don't want to spook him, and I think it'd be best if only one of us goes. I spent some time with his powers, and I think I have an idea what he's missing. I have the best bet of getting through to him. Gerald, take me to wherever he went, and then leave. I'll call for you after we're done."
"I don't know," Gerald said dubiously.
"It wasn't a request," Phoebe stated firmly, and the group saw the conviction in her eyes.
Gerald looked into her face for several moments, before he nodded. He grabbed her, and they both vanished.
***
When Phoebe could see again, she saw a devastated room, with wrecked furniture strewn throughout. The door to the balcony was open, and Phoebe could see her son staring out into the night. She looked Gerald, who nodded and faded out.
Phoebe walked forward gingerly and questioned, "Gabriel?" Gabriel did not turn or move, so Phoebe added, "Son, I want to talk."
"About what?" Gabriel remarked conversationally.
"I won't pretend to understand what you've been through," Phoebe began, "but I held your powers once, so I have a better chance than anyone else to understand. I know it was difficult, and it feels weird, but you can get through this."
Gabriel laughed bitterly, "It does more than feel weird, Mother."
"Gerald told me you're still in pain," Phoebe tried, but Gabriel whirled.
"Pain doesn't even begin to describe it," Gabriel snapped, "My mind is on fire, and it takes every ounce of willpower I have not to collapse screaming. And the pain isn't diminishing, and I don't think it will ever end. So you tell me, how am I supposed to 'get through this'?"
"Tell me how to help you," Phoebe begged.
Gabriel hesitated, and then whispered, "There is one thing."
"What?" Phoebe pressed.
Tears began to trail down Gabriel's cheeks as he said, "Kill me."
"I will not." Phoebe countered.
"Mom, it hurts. I'm so tired of fighting it, and I'm so tired," Gabriel cried, "I thought I could handle it, but I'm not good enough, not strong enough. All I want is for the agony to end. Please help me end it."
Phoebe pulled Gabriel into her arms. Gabriel tried to resist, but he simply didn't have the strength. As Gabriel collapsed weeping, Phoebe rocked him back and forth and said softly, "You may not be strong enough alone, but WE are. We'll get you through this son. All of us will work, and we'll find a way to cure you. You just need to hold on, and let us help you."
Gabriel simply begged, "Help me, please." He continued to weep as Phoebe rocked and soothed him. Finally, he lost consciousness in her arms.
Phoebe looked up at the sky for guidance. She had kept him from suicide for now, but if she didn't find a solution soon, Gabriel would fall back. What was she going to do?
***
Gabriel looked around in confusion. The last thing he remembered, he was being held by his mother in his uncle's office. Yet, he now found himself in a barren landscape with plain features and an empty sky. Gabriel yelled, "HELLO!" and listened to his voice echo in the distance. "Where am I," Gabriel muttered.
"You're in a part of your mind," a new voice said softly. Gabriel whirled, and felt his heart stop. Standing in front of him was impossibility, something that just couldn't be. As the person before him refused to fade, Gabriel whispered,
"Angel."
TO BE CONTINUED.