Emily was preparing his Most Maliciousness's temple to host the Secular Festival, a once every hundred year celebration. Candles were still being placed all around the Nekromanteion. The blue fire lit torches were placed all along the miles of catacombs underneath the temple.
Emily barely finished herding several black cows into the stables for the upcoming sacrifices. She even had the pain in the ass privilege of overseeing the preparations for housing an entire troupe of performers in the nearest city, Ephyra just so the cast could perform the plays over the next three days. Despite all these tasks, Emily was in yet another argument with Nicco.
"I do not believe this woman possesses the necessary abilities as a seer to recommend such a course my Lord." Nicco pled his case to Hades on his knees with his head bowed low to the ground.
Emily was surprised the priest had the balls to say that much in front of Hades. At most, the priest usually spat out a few honorifics and some base lines of agreement with the god.
"She has no business changing anything in the Nekromanteion so close to the festival." Nicco's lips pursed sourly as he focused his narrowed eyes on the blonde.
Emily rolled her eyes because all she changed was the order of when the sacrifices were to occur. She didn't see why all the sacrifices had to happen simultaneously at midnight. Hades himself didn't even care when the sacrifices were made.
"Oi vey. Enough with the power play. Look, sometimes you have to accept that a woman has certain qualifications that you just can't compete with." Hades rolled his hand to reveal a smokey hourglass.
"Besides, do you really think I'd bring a seer into my temple without certifying her abilities?" Hades eyebrows wriggled with heavy innuendo.
Emily felt her mouth go dry and was left to open and shut her lips mutely. Hades was actually implying she was sleeping with him, classy. She wanted to tear that smug grin from his lips. The clergy couldn't possibly believe Hades had given her free reign of his festival just because she was sleeping with him? This was Hades. Even sex wasn't enough to win the god over.
"Why did you imply I'm your concubine?" She waited to ask the question when the others were outside the room. Hades's mood swings were difficult enough to predict. She wasn't about to risk adding more variables into the already explosive equation.
"Because you're a little girl trying to tell my guys what to do for their god. And doll, without an exchange of divine communion from god to seer, how exactly did you expect this to go?" Hades patted her head and rolled his eyes in annoyance. He was doing the girl a favor. He could have said nothing and let her fail on her own. Instead, he granted her his favor publicly. If anything she should be offering to legitimize his claims not whining.
"Divine communion? Is that really what you call it?" Emily grimaced.
"It's the most sacred of exchanges." Hades winked and magnanimously ignored her open revulsion.
"I'll bet you think it is." Emily shuddered at the image of Hades and sex. It was just too jarring to picture the seven foot tall god in the sack.
"I wouldn't be so glib. I don't have to play nice." Hades was unable to shrug off her second insult and decided little Miss Innocent needed to be taught a lesson.
"This is you playing nice?" Emily tried to work her way out of another bad mood by adding levity to her strained voice. She knew immediately the effort was wasted when Hades's eyes narrowed shrewdly.
"Mmm what did you expect? I'm a god. I don't exactly need practice playing nice. But if you keep complaining I can show you what I do have a lot of practice doing." He made the offer a third time, drawing out each word purely to determine the scale of punishment he planned for his irreverent little seer.
"Ugh. No thank you." She knew the words were wrong but she couldn't find it in herself to humor him. It was just too gross to consider. It was one thing to flirt with Hades, but this was outright solicitation.
Hades sparked red instantly. Did she really think he wasn't going to pay that nasty comment forward?
"Hey, well you don't need my help here, I mean it's not like you can't handle a once every hundred year festival all by yourself. Because if you couldn't, well, that just might mean I delay the whole going home thing from later to never.
"But you said you'd send me home."
"Oh I am, but who knows when I'llget around to sending you home.
"But you said—"
"I know!" Flames rose high to punctuate Hades's rage. Hades chest heaved before he calmed.
"I know exactly what I said." The red flames simmered back to blue and he calmed.
"But I never specified whether I'd send you back alive or dead or hey how soon it'd be after the little Demi-god's death." Hades smiled, jutting his chin forward to display rows of sharp teeth and purple gums.
"Hades." She chewed on his name with the intent to snap her teeth through his entire name. He was too close and it was clear he was openly threatening her.
"Let's try this again." Hades rolled his eyes at the bite she put into his name. As if a mortal could hope to pose a threat to a god.
"When I give you a title, accept it. Maybe with a please and definitely with a thank you." Hades pulled her into the air with the surrounding smoke and wrapped her arms tight in smokey coils. Hades's yellow eyes were glowing with a silent threat, because if she so much as tried to raise her voice again he'd raise the temperature so high that all she would be able to do was scream. If she wanted to reject him, fine, let her see just how bad life gets without divine intervention.
"Thank you for giving me such an illustriously lewd title Hades." Her head bowed forward allowing her blonde hair to curtain her face to hide her expression because it was the only move she could make. The tight smokey coils did not give her much room to move and she was growing scared she might have gone too far.
"You're welcome." Hades's lip curled around the words. Oh, she was in for it. He relaxed the coils along her ribs and let her drop unprotected to the floor.
"Now on to business." Hades turned his back to the crumpled seer on the floor.
"My festival is a celebration of the lucky son of a bitch who gets to stay above ground until their one hundredth birthday. Despite my best efforts." Hades turned to face Emily, his face composed with a blank but sour smile.
"You're celebrating someone living for one hundred years." Emily was skeptical Hades could celebrate life especially since the smoke coils were still whipping across the ground like angry snakes.
"Not exactly." Hades noticed her wary glances at the smoke and allowed the coils to evaporate before pulling her off the ground with a hand. Hades squished Emily into his side and savored her discomfort. At least until she pushed her hands against his chest to break free. Hades simply let go and allowed Emily to drop to the ground for a second time.
"Knew it. What's the catch?" She hated togas. The fabric made it difficult to pull herself to her feet and Hades looked far too pleased with her struggle to stand.
"Oh no, it's nothing like that. I always uphold my end, I throw a big party, promise that I won't reap the jerk for the next hundred years." Hades snorted at her failed attempts to stand and allowed his smoke tendrils to gently pull her upright.
"But this year?" Emily swallowed at the gesture. Hades didn't usually use a gentle hand unless he planned on doing something much worse later.
"But this year I rigged the lottery. Every hundred years Zeusy picks the candidates and I bless them." Hades eyes lit with manic excitement before his face pulled into a scowl.
"This year my minions switched out the list and added my top picks to my brother's list of so-called worthy ones." Hades flashed a list into existence before snapping it back into smokey limbo.
"So who'd you pick?" Emily watched Hades warily. He was up to something and it definitely involved her.
"Aw, that would spoil the fun." Hades grinned so sharply that were he not immortal he likely would have been cut by his own teeth.
"So what exactly am I doing?" Emily sucked in a breath. He wasn't sharing, this was incredibly bad.
"You my little cherub are on sacrifice duty. Usually Apollo's oracles do it, but given this is my festival I get final pick." He had mentioned his seer to Apollo. But strangely, Mr. Sunshine had no clue who Emily was and was certain the girl was not a bonafide seer. There were many explanations for the oversight, but Hades suspected his seer was no oracle.
"Apparently, someone isn't registered with Apollo's temple. Not that I care, but how exactly did you get all that foresight without getting vetted personally by Apollo?" Seeing a limited view of the future was strictly Apollo's domain and it was a gift he bestowed only to his most devout followers.
"I guess I'm just lucky?" Emily stepped away from Hades. He wasn't going to like her answer and she needed to create a safe radius before he blew his top.
"I'm starting to doubt this whole seer spiel you gave me." Hades stepped closer, pursuing the seer until her back hit the wall of a marble column.
"But this is an easy fix." Hades was looming over the tiny seer, sharp fingers pinching her blonde hair to his lips. Watching her tremble for him inside his temple tempted him badly. He could understand why Apollo registered his seers in such a way.
"Tonight, just pick the right name, the one that Zeusy plans to choose. Get it to me before the naming ceremony starts and I might not punish you for your little deception." Hades let her blonde locks slip through his fingers before standing tall. Too tempting.
He had plenty of time to punish the seer when he found out she was lying. For now he had business to attend to and couldn't stay much longer. Hades stepped back into a shadow before disappearing down to the underworld.
"Great." Emily's sullen voice echoed into the now empty temple.
The naming ceremony was to occur tonight after the final sacrifice was dedicated to Hades. So, on the higher end she had an estimated eight hours to predict who Zeus would name before Hades decided to screw her over.
At the start of the day she was optimistic she could find a solution, but by the last hour she resorted to absently wondering through the festivities. She might as well enjoy her last day by having fun and maybe getting a little tipsy before she was literally fired by Hades. He was probably going to melt her alive.
She was downing half a glass of watered down wine when she noticed the man next to her was wearing winged sandals. Emily knew there was someone important who wore shoes with wings. But this guy looked too human to be an Olympian. He didn't even glow. Still, she remembered someone with those shoes.
"Some festival eh?" Emily sidled up to the man and slouched near the short guy waiting for a response.
"It's no bacchanal but got to say it looks better than some of the other events Hades put on." The man eyed the blonde carefully before shrugging. Mortals were known to be overly friendly during celebrations especially after wine.
"So, who do you think? Who is Zeus picking?" Hermes? But didn't Hermes glow?
Emily grabbed the bowl of wine and filled both of their glasses. If there was one thing Hades taught her, it was that if you wanted information from someone you needed alcohol.
"Who knows." Strange chick. But the wine was decent so no harm in taking an indulgence.
"Oh come on. Where's the fun in that? Who do you think Zeus will pick." Yep. This guy was definitely Hermes. The cadence plus the shoes—dead give away.
"Probably will be the first name he reads. Usually it is, or so I've heard." Hermes smiled at the new cup of wine and shook his head. The big guy was usually too busy to review the paperwork side of things. Most of the time he settled on the first name on the list since all the candidates were pre-approved. No bad choices, ergo no worries.
"Yeah? The first name huh." Emily drank more from her cup before standing. It was a start at least.
"What's the hold up?" Pain hissed with his bulging eyes narrowed.
"Yeah! Just pick a name already." Panic was skittering all across the floor. If they didn't get her choice back to Hades before the ceremony, they'd be burnt to cinders.
"Ok ok already. I'm picking the red head. That Zagerious guy." Emily reached for Panic's tail to stop him from scurrying under the curtains again and losing the imp in the audience.
Zagerious's last name was Acheron and alphabetically he would be first on the list—at least assuming things were organized by last name. Emily hoped she was right.
She swallowed and prepared for the last sacrifice of the night. While she really didn't want to kill the poor cow for Hades, of all the gods, she really didn't have much of a choice. Especially, as Hades was still acting prissy over her earlier comments. Big baby wouldn't even consider letting her delegate the sacrificing bullshit to Nicco.
Emily finished her duty covered in hot smelly blood and waited for Zeus to pick a name different from the name she gave Hades. She waited to be pulled back down to the underworld or worse. She didn't think Hades would kill her but he didn't exactly know he wouldn't. Maybe he would just turn her into a gorgon?
Emily watched Zeus read all three names from the list. The thunder god was taller than Hades and certainly better looking compared with the sallow skinned King of the Underworld. But she couldn't understand how Zeus failed to notice each nettlesome comment Hades made at his brother's expense during the ceremony. Perhaps it was because Zeus didn't care what Hades did or maybe it was because Zeus didn't notice the brazen comments, either way the lack of reaction from Zeus was impressive.
"Zagerious Acheron." Zeus huffed out the name in a booming voice that filled the pavilion with the roars of thunder and a ferocious blast of wind which nearly knocked down some of the viewers.
Holy shit. Emily threw up after the name was called. The earlier wine and anxiety finally caught up to her. She wiped her mouth with the edge of her chiton and was unable to believe she was safe.
"Well, what do you know? My seer is just as reliable as any oracle of Delphi."Hades had long since stepped away from the cheers swelling across the pavilion. He knew Apollo wouldn't be too far from the festivities since the god needed to see the outcome of their bet. Hades grinned wider when Apollo stuck up his proud nose into the air in response to the greeting.
"Guess that means you owe me a little plague transport this winter." Hades slapped the sun god on his back when Apollo tried to turn away. Hades relished Apollo's immediate scowl.
"We will see just how reliable your new seer proves to be. I remain unconvinced she possesses any true foresight." Apollo shrugged Hades's arm from his shoulder. Apollo focused his burning glare on the seer. He had certainly not bestowed this woman with any form of clairvoyance. Yet, somehow she had given Hades insight into the future. The only explanation was pure luck.
"Apollo, babe, you need to loosen up. It's a party. Frolic. Enjoy the company. Heard there's a couple of nymphs in town that won't turn into trees on ya." Hades relished the hate Apollo focused on the seer before storming away. That's right sunshine, I have an Oracle that you didn't personally anoint.
Emily had just barely finished retching when the temperature started to rise. No, why did he need to speak with her now?
"Babe, you did great. I got my guys on the playing field and you proved your stuff." Hades pulled her into an embrace squeezing her tight.
"You know I had my doubts about the whole seer thing." Hades dropped his seer to the floor gently before stretching onto his side an inch above the ground before he noticed the vomit and immediately pulled away to stand.
"Yeesh. Didn't think you were a weak stomach kind of chick. But relax, first time jitters are normal after the first blood sacrifice." Hades scrunched his nose at the mess. Hades was only now noticing Emily was still covered in blood and that the room smelled rancid. Hades was thankful his smokey chiton was stain proof, one of the many perks of divinity.
"Don't laugh, but with the lack of prophecies you've been sharing, I was starting to think maybe I could get a better use out of you by distracting Apollo. Maybe even get some grade doom plague." Hades planned on pissing off Apollo directly, but her irreverence was so obnoxious he involved Emily as a pawn.
"But now, I've got Apollo delivering a plague to Athen, he's covering my costs, and it's all because you picked the right name." Hades was pleased with his seer's performance despite her appallingly weak stomach. A plague equaled more souls coming into the underworld, and more power. But most importantly, Apollo was doing all the dirty work, which was phenomenal since Mr. Sunshine claimed such deliveries were beneath him during the proposition stages of their negotiations.
"I'm thrilled Hades. So, what would have happened to me if I got the name wrong?" Emily hoped his mood was good enough to tell her that much.
"That depends. Can you turn into a tree?" Hades smiled slyly.
"No?" She definitely could not, but wanted to know exactly what Hades was getting at.
"Well, best case you'd have to earn that foresight and receive more than just an honoree title of concubine and worst case, let's just say Apollo can get a little blindsided." The seer Tiresias could vouch for that much.
"Glad to know I work for a god who won't sell me out." Emily wished she could yell at him. How dare he offer to trade her like that.
"Glad to know my seer didn't get her certification underneath Mr. I-drive-the-sun-behind-my-chariot-everyday. So, who was it?" Hades grinned knowingly. Such a tease, pretending to be so appalled when she already engaged in such transactions with other immortals. He hadn't pressed the issue at first because he assumed she came by her abilities the usual way which almost always involved Apollo. Now, he just wanted to know which god or titan was stepping on the Sun god's toes.
"I told you, I don't know." Emily was not able to say more than that as her abilities were complicated in origin.
"Please tell me it wasn't during a golden shower of light?" Hades swallowed and looked at Emily with wide horrified eyes. Not Zeus. Anyone but his brother.
"No. I think I would have noticed that. Wait, do seers only get their ability to see the future by sleeping with gods?" Emily thought for sure Hades was exaggerating. There was no way that was standard procedure.
"Not technically necessary, but in most cases a solid first step. Although, some unluckies get their abilities by refusing to sleep with Apollo." Hades shrugged. Poor little Cassandra. Apollo's would-be seer really thought the worst part of her rejection would be the inability to see the future. How naive.
"What's the difference?" Emily couldn't understand why Apollo would give out such powers in either scenario.
"So a 'yes' lets the would-be-seer see the future they pick and a 'no' makes them see only the worst bits." Hades chuckled at the brutal way Apollo offered his blessings.
"That's messed up." Emily stared blankly. Were all gods just massive assholes?
"Puts the whole hissy fit you threw over my friendly little title into perspective doesn't it?" Hades poked her nose with a sharp nail. He felt her shift under his touch and lifted his eyebrows. "Really, not even going to attempt an apology?"
"I'm sorry! Sheesh. I'd be lucky to share your bed alright?" Emily stepped further from the finger he jabbed into her nose. There was no benefit to pissing Hades off again, might as well apologize before the safety of his good mood wore off.
"You'd be lucky? That's your apology? Really?" Hades crossed his arms and waited for her to try again.
Emily bit her tongue to prevent herself from making a mean spirited comment that was sure to get her killed.
"Hades, I'm sorry for not appreciating your protections and title." Hades rolled his eyes and Emily knew she needed to focus on flattering Hades over reasoning with the god.
"It also says a lot that you don't need to lure people to your bed by offering them the ability to see the future just so you get laid. I'm glad I work for you rather than Apollo or any other Olympian." Emily relaxed when Hades's mouth formed a genuine smile. Hades rarely smiled so a true smile was a guarantee he was in a great mood.
"That is a much better apology. But be aware, those protections don't extend very far above ground, especially outside my temple." Hades kept the warning cryptic. No point in frightening the girl with specifics, at least not until Apollo made the first move. She seemed to grasp the exact type of danger Apollo presented. Even the dumbest mortal at least had some familiarity with the cautionary tale of Daphne.
Notes:
This chapter came together quicker than expected. But hopefully it's clean enough to read. I sometimes just have to say, just post the damn chapter otherwise you're never going to get to the fun parts.
I really want to have a chance to give Hades a villain origin story and twist some greek myths. I also want to keep Hades in character as much as possible. Since the OC here is a mortal not a goddess I'm trying to emphasise that even if Hades were to favour a mortal he's not likely to go soft on them when they push his buttons or insult him.
He's definitely the most likely of the gods to tolerate back talk. But I think the only reason Hades tolerated that level of sass from Meg was because literally NO ONE talks to Hades unless they HAVE too. Even the Olympians can't stand Hades and in actual mythology and NO ONE even called Hades by his actual name. His worshippers were afraid if they even whispered his name he'd just say fuck it and drag you to the underworld so they would just bang on the ground to get his attention.
Also, mortals are so far below gods, and considering Hades pretty much only deals with the dead kind he isn't likely to feel much about a mortal servant for awhile. Because why bother they die in a blink of an eye and even the living ones are terrified of him which I do not think Hades LOVES because while he enjoys the reputation he has as Lord of the Dead and a god you DO NOT FUCK WITH he probably also wants people to worship him the same way they do his little brother Zeus.
So he is not going to treat a mortal the same way he would a goddess like Persephone (who for purposes of this fic will not be his wife but may/may not make a cameo later on in the story). Mortals are not equals with gods so Hades is not going to bother with wooing one the way he would a goddess. He's rejection sensitive so he is not likely to be direct unless he's certain he has enough leverage to get EXACTLY what he wants and as a god he is willing to punish a mortal who rejects him, hurts his feelings, ect. Hades is so complicated internally but also just so much fun to write dialogue for because no matter how expressive he is at surface level there is so much MORE under the surface.