Disclaimer: Can't I own them? Please? At least Matt Hardy?

Author: Chimera

Summary: A descent into the past and a freefall into the present – Willow the Wisp searches to pay back an old enemy.

Pairings: Jeff/Willow, Sean O'Haire/Spanky, quite probably Matt/Shannon

Rating: PG

My Excuse: If any of the characters' behaviours seem a little…tweaked…that's because I live in Australia and the last time I saw Smackdown was way back when Rey Mysterio defeated Chris Benoit and Kurt Angle in a triple threat. Poor me, huh?

Notes: Minus Crash Holly from the band of MFers. I don't like the dude. Also there has been no return of Hulk Hogan as Mr America. Plus this is my first response to a challenge.

Notes 2: I have only very basic knowledge of OMEGA. By the time this fic is over I hope to have brought up a lot of old OMEGA stuff – so if anyone can assist me with a little more detail, the next chapter of any story they wish will be dedicated to them. Contact me at rejected_loser_babe@hotmail.com or if_its_not_enough_sorry@hotmail.com

The Undertaker's Muse/Grasshoppers Challenge:

It's been said that if Jeff comes back to the WWE, he'll most likely be on the same brand as Matt. At the moment, he's doing indy shows back home as Willow the Whisp. What if Jeff made his return...as Willow? As such, what if he teamed up with Sean O'Haire and Roddy Piper?

_MUST HAVE/BE:_
- WWE/Buffy the Vampire Slayer (how you do so is up to you)
- be in character
- Willow/Willow (meaning Jeff/Willow...confusion is fun)
- O'Haire/Dawn Marie -OR- O'Haire/Spanky
- "My boyfriend wears more dresses than I do!"
- Willow's (Jeff's) umbrella
- references to "Surge" (Matt) and "Kid Dynamo" (Shannon)
- "Remember: Pillage, *then* burn."
- "Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups."
- "It's been lovely, but I have to scream now."

   He fastened his mask on for the first time in a long time.

   It felt so strange, so…unnatural, almost, to wear the mask again.

   But it felt like he was coming home.

   He glanced at himself in the mirror, checking himself. The mask was basically the same, a fairly bright jester's hat and mask – this pair in a sinister murky gold. The tights had changed – still the same style, but different in their complexity and colours. Dark, only dark colours…blues and purples, sickly greens and a dark yellow that was the colour of an old, painful bruise.

   An equally dark smile came over his face at that thought. _An old bruise…exactly what I am._

   He picked up his old prop and studied it for a moment. The simplest of things could hurt the most, an old colleague had told him. He had taught him the theory of his on tables…everyone used them, everyone had one, so why not bring one into wrestling? Same with chairs. The simplest things in the world were used by the homicidal, genocidal, suicidal maniac…

   …and Willow the Wisp was nothing if not a good student.

   He picked up his old umbrella and headed out, ignoring the whispers of Dawn Marie and her newest conquest Johnny Stamboli.

   Surge was going to pay.

   "Gah," Dawn eeped out as she took in the two pretty damn massive guys standing in front of her.

   "Uck," Willow agreed nervously.

   The two men exchanged glances. "Willow Rosenburg, right?" the taller one asked.

   "Uh, yeah," the redhead confirmed.

   "Hi. We were sent to pick you up," the blonde answered her unspoken question.

   The both of them hefted up the girls' bags without complaint, or difficulty. Dawn followed in amazement – it had taken Xander twenty minutes to drag her bag downstairs, and taken both Willow, Dawn and Anya nearly forty-five minutes to pull and push and heave the witch's bag to the car. Of course Buffy had just watched with an amused grin, and had fussed over the carpet when they all knew full and well that she could have gotten both bags out to the elected transportation in less than five minutes. The two unidentified men had picked them up no problem.

   Willow followed, a little on edge. Mr. McMahon hadn't said anything about two men picking them up. Indeed, she thought Dawn and herself would need to call a taxi and just get taken to WWE headquarters.

   She blushed a little as she realised the benefits of her vantage point. Both guys had very nice little tushes.