^_^V Wei? I'm y2cd and this is my first time to write a songfic.I got
inspired in the fic "eclipse of the heart" it's really magnificent. I
really hope you like this fic and please be patient it's just my first time
and please review after you read some chapters of this fic I really
absolutely will be grateful if you review or send feedbacks about this fic
in my eadd. Enough of this babblings yadda yadda so on with the fic!
Disclaimer: I do not own beyblade it's originally owned by Aoki Takao
"Speaking" (*thinking*)
(
Chapter 1- Somewhere I Belong
The BladeBreakers was practicing ages ago in the park. Tyson and Max were fighting against each others blades, Kai was sitting aloof from them on the bench, crossed arms and legs, obviously his normal position, stoic and cold as ever while Kenny was sitting on the other bench typing and Rei was gaping blankly at his blade like a weirdo.
[when this began] I had nothing to say And I get lost in the nothingness Inside of me
Rei was lost in track of time just gaping at Driger for a long time. Kai just watched his two teammates command their beyblade.
"Tyson don't be so carefree in your defense you're giving Max an opportunity to win,'' Kai mentioned his teammate's errors.
"I know that,'' Tyson retorted back.
"Hmph.brat," Kai garbled under his breath. He noticed Rei who was under a tree leaning his back on the trunk and gaping at his blade. (*Hmm.what on earth he's doing, he looks stupid*) Kai stared at Rei bewilderedly. Rei was still in that position when he noticed someone was staring at him. He looked around and noticed Kai's eyes upon him.
(*.Why he's staring at me? Do I have a dirt on my face? Oh goodie he thinks I'm nuts.*)
" Yeah! I won! No hard feelings bud, you're just unlucky today," Max said after jumping up on the air. Rei's attention was drawn by Max cheering.
"..Ok fine.sheesh.Hey guys let's go to the restaurant nearby, I'm starving," Tyson said while picking up his blade.
"Yep. Me too, after that challenging fight.. Rei, Kai are you coming along?''
"Uh .yes," Rei alleged perplexingly "Kai, you coming?'' Kai just nodded lazily.
"Alright let's go!!!" Tyson screeched blissfully.
~~~
Rei didn't discern the inquisitive stares of his teammates.
[I was confused] and I live it all to find that I'm not the only person with these things on mind [inside of me]
(*. I don't understand why I'm feeling this towards Kai, I know that I'm such a fool feeling this emotion towards the emotionless bastard.but I can't fight this feeling anymore.It's driving me crazy when I try to.*)
But all they can see the words revealed Is the only real thing that I've got left to feel
"Rei, are you alright? You barely touched your food," Max asked agitatedly concerned for his friend.
"Um. yeah I'm fine, just no appetite," Rei told Max and shoved away his plate.
"Are you sure you're alright Rei?" Kenny asked again.
"Yeah, tell us if you're fine we're just worried about you," Tyson joined in.
"I said I'm fine guys no need to worry about me," Rei persisted hoping that would work.
"Ok, just tell us Rei if you have a problem 'k?" Tyson said reassuringly.
Rei just nodded as a response. He just drank the lemonade that's all he took to fill his stomach at their lunch.
~~~
They returned back to their hotel where they stayed in; in the room where Kai and Rei shared you'd merely hear the sound of the clock and nothing else more. Rei was looking blankly again at the ceiling.
[nothing to lose] Just stuck, hollow and alone And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own
(*This is really foolish .they're already becoming chary any minute now. this emotion is affecting me a lot.I can't conceal and struggle against this feeling inside.I have to reveal this one day but how?.What will he say.? I have to reveal this before I go insane.*)
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long [ erase the pain 'til it's gone]
(*I wish this is not real, I wish this emotion will vanish in the thin air faster than the blink of my eyes .this is so crazy, so foolish I'm not myself anymore.I'm the foolish Rei falling because of that emotionless bastard*)
I wanna heal, I wanna close something real I wanna find I've wanted all wanted all along Somewhere I belong
(*.This is really giving me a bad headache. I don't want to be like this always.I'll be insane if I stay like this forever.I have to reveal it.I don't care what will he say or act the most important is I'll reveal this emotions but.how.?*)
And I've got nothing to say I can't believe I didn't fall right down on my face [I was confused]
"How? How? I need to find out." Rei asked himself repetitively. "How?"
"How, what?" A cold and monotone voice said (A/N: hmm. camera focus pls.and drum rolls)
Rei was alarmed by the voice and when he looked around, he saw the stoic leader leaning his back at the opened door of the washroom and crossed arms as usual.
"Nothing at all." Rei feigned bluntly.
"You're not good at lying Rei, so don't expect I'll believe your excuses," Kai told Rei impersonally
"Oh.mmm.yeah," Rei stuttered.
Looking everywhere to find That it's not the way I had imagined it all in my mind
"Nervous? Don't be I'm not gonna eat you alive," Kai told smirking at Rei.
"I'm not nervous who told you so?" Rei objected.
"Myself. Care to say your problem? You're acting unusual today," Kai told him while closing the portal of the washroom and impending where Rei was.
(*Now, what does he want? He's making my heartbeat faster every time he's near.*)
Kai sat near the edge of Rei's bed.
(*He's beautiful in this close distance*)
"You didn't answer my question yet," Kai said in his monotone voice. Even he has the same feeling towards the Chinese blader his emotion still hid under his mask.
"I have no problem Kai. I'm fine," Rei tried to fibbed again but for the observant leader it didn't work.
"I told you Rei, you're not gonna deceive me."
"I don't need someone's help to crack this problem out," Rei stated seriously.
"Tch.I'm not trying to help Rei I'm just asking you," Kai told to Rei frigidly.they both glare with each other.seeking feelings and emotions but as expected Kai always block all emotions inside of him.
Rei looked away.
(*Waah! Help he's still glaring at me like a disgusting stuff sort of that!*)
/Shut up kid, I'm trying to have a nice catnap here!/
(*You're so mean Drig, I need your help!*)
/Wait until I get a nice catnap ok.'till next time ne./
(*.If I had a chance.I would straggle this tiger and hit him on his head.*)
"Hmph." Kai stood up and walked away closing the door in front of Rei.
''Oh what the heck.he walked away from me.watashi wa bakeru." Rei whispered to himself.
[so what am I]
What do I have but negativity
The afternoon hours passed and the BladeBreakers just enjoyed themselves but Rei was still at his own little world.. The sun had set off and night started to crawl up the sky, the moon had appeared with her daughters--the stars glinting upon the creatures below them and the moon serving the light she gave to all the creatures below..
Rei was sitting on the chair at the balcony enjoying the night breeze and again in his own world..
Cause I can't trust to find the way
(*How? How? How???????? This bothers me a lot..... I think my head is gonna blow...*)
The same question passed through the Rei's mind repetitively..
(*How?????? How???????? How??????*)
~~~
During the supper, Tyson really enjoyed while Max whined to Tyson to leave some food for him and Kenny.. Rei has still no appetite to eat his food, Kai stayed stoic as ever but he's not mad at Rei.
Everyone is looking at me
"You ok Rei?" Max asked Rei.
"Yeah. Thanks.just no appetite," Rei said looking at Max.
"Again!?? Lemme eat your food!" Tyson shouted delightedly.
"Tyson?!" Max whined.
"You're hopeless Tyson.. Rei are you sick or what? You're going to be lighter than before if you don't eat," Kenny said to Rei as far as he's concerned.
Kai just glanced at Rei..
[nothing to lose] nothing to gain, hollow and alone and the fault is my own, and the fault is my own and the fault is my own
(*.He always ignore me.he doesn't know I'm having a hard time because of him.. I'm really foolish that I had feelings to this frigid stunner . But, this is my own fault I gave in to him. *)
"Hey Rei?! Buddy? What's the matter?" Tyson asked.
"Er.yeah.what.?" Rei said uncomprehendingly, his mind not really registering well.
".Rei are you sure you're ok?" Kenny asked the same question.
"Yes.just got lost in track, hehe.."
"Hhm." Max placed his hand over Rei's bandana and his other hand to his neck. "Your temperature is same as mine. What's the matter with you Rei?" Max said putting away his hand.
"I'm fine guys. Nothing to worry about," Rei said tolerantly to Max.
"You sure Rei?" Kenny and Tyson asked in unison.
"I told you guys, I'm fine."
"Hh.." Kai muttered under his breath.
"Rei?" Max uttered, his voice expressing concern and worry.
"I said I'm fine." Rei's voice rose a notch higher than usual.
"We're just concerned Rei," Tyson said reasoning out for how Rei had acted.
"I know Tyson." Rei said with his voice now raw.
"Care to share your problems Rei maybe we can help you. You're our friend Rei, you don't have to keep your problem from us, you're not Kai you know," Max said counseling Rei.
Rei was taken aback because of Max had said to him.
"I know Max but.I can crack this problem out by myself," Rei said genuinely and hostile.
"Rei you need our support and help."
"Max you won't understand it! I need to be alone in other things without anyone's help!"
"Guys.guys don't argue" Kenny interrupted.
"You're acting like Kai, Rei!" Max voice rose a notch higher.
"Max. I'm not acting like Kai, this is me Max not anybody else. I just need time and space for myself," Rei's voice was piercing and plain.
"Whoa buddies stop arguing don't start a quarrel!" Tyson said worrying about his friends. This was the first time that Rei and Max argued..
".Right Rei. If you need my help I'm just here by your side," Max voice changes to placid now.
Rei smiled and that clears that they're not mad at each other. He stood up and walked away..
"Phew. That's a close to a quarrel," Tyson sigh in relief.
"Yeah, you're right Tyson," Kenny joined.
"Kai, aren't you concerned about Rei?" Max asked.
"You heard him. He needs time and space for himself," Kai said as usual in his monotone voice but deep deep inside his feelings he's concerned for the Chinese blader.
Max just acquiesce to what Kai said and they just continued eating their supper and when they ended their supper they went towards their own rooms.
~~~
Kai entered the room closing the door quietly.he looked at the balcony and saw his teammate who passed through the barriers of his heart and reached the emotions hiding within it. He walked towards the bed and sat there watching his teammate carefully.
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long [erase all the pain 'til it's gone]
Rei looked at the sky, wind blowing his bangs away from his face, wishing the wind would take him away too and just vanish and not exist anymore above the cruel world he's living on right now for sixteen years. He wanted to feel numb.
I want to heal, I wanna feel like I'm close to something real I wanna let find something I've wanted all along Somewhere I belong
Right. All he wanted was to be dead, numb at things he's suffering in his life.. But if he didn't hold on to hope he won't reveal his emotions to the other blader. All his feelings for his leader would stay hidden and be a prisoner of his heart.all his emotions would make no sense.
I will never know myself until I do this on my own And I will never feel anything else 'til my wounds are healed
He'd just help himself no matter what risk he would take to reveal his true emotions to his leader, no matter how his leader would react if he reveal his feelings to him.. He have to get through this dilemma.
I will never be anything 'til I break away from me I will break away and find myself today
His heart retaliated against his mind that he shouldn't fall for his leader but his heart would object to what his mind was telling. The greatest foe of Rei was himself, he had no possibility to win.. He wouldn't be free from his old self if he will not break away.. Moon and stars stared down at him, staring at him for being a fool. Rei had kept blaming himself for being an imprudent idiot but it's too late now to blame himself. His emotions for his leader overpowered his heart and mind.thus he's afraid to reveal his feelings.
No progress will happen. He'd forever stay stuck in this chasm of his emotions.
~~~
I wanna heal, I wanna feel What I thought was never real I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long [erase all the pain 'til it's gone]
All Kai can do was watch keenly his teammate. He couldn't do anything but watch and stare. He's afraid that if he reveal his true emotions the Chinese blader wouldn't return his love for him.. He's tired of being alone again.. All he loved deserted him.. He's afraid to try again, afraid to be alone again in the midst of the dark.. He needed someone who really cares for him, fight his fears away, someone who can return his love..
I wanna heal, I wanna feel Like I'm close to something real I wanna find something I've wanted all along Somewhere I belong
He felt like he's impalpable. Nobody cared for him because he's an emotionless jerk. Everyone thought he's not able to feel anything. Pain, grief, solitude and .love. He's still a human even to the other people, he pertains to a stone, emotionless and cares for himself only.. But all changed when he became close to his Chinese teammate..
I wanna heal, I wanna feel Like I'm somewhere I belong I wanna heal, I wanna feel Like I'm somewhere I belong Somewhere I belong
He wanted a place where he can be loved, comforted and to be cared for.. Somewhere in the Chinese blader's heart.. He was sure he can have all what he wanted in there..
A place in Rei's heart..
~~~~~~~~~~~
phooey. ok chapter one is done hope you like it peeps I really hope. well the title is revelation cause I used 'reveal' many times got the point if anyone wants to point-out my mistakes in grammar you're free to do it and other mistakes cause my nationality is different told 'ya that peeps. If anyone wants to send feedback in my eadd here it is: y2cd_yinyang@yahoo.com. sigh hope I will have reviews.I'll be happy if I have seven reviews to twenty.watashi wa bakeru- means I'm stupid.so see 'ya peeps next time promise I'll be posting as immediately as soon as possible as I could maybe once a week every chapter.
% zai jian % lol
Well I'm back again! Wei again! Thanks for those who reviewed (in advance if there's someone) I really appreciate it. It's hard to ponder a song to relate to my musings and ideas so long to type this fic again. That the actors really enjoyed especially ¬_¬. Mr. Sourpuss would you mind saying it??
Kai: *Glares* Of course I enjoy it! No emotional stuffs. Hh. But you killed my enjoyment darn..
Y2cd: I don't care, however, you need to work for me and for your beloved partner here.*grabs Rei*
Rei: Whaa!
Kai: *blush* ..He's not my beloved partner..silly!!!
Rei: What do you mean "beloved" eh?
Y2cd: Rei I'll explain it to you *drags Rei* .
Kai: Wait! NOOOO!! *blush*
Y2cd: Haha say it or I'll tell Rei that...
Kai: OK! OK just don't tell him!!!
Rei: ?? ._.
Kai: This means the authoress doesn't own Beyblade cause all of us will die because of overwork.
Y2cd: What the heck are you telling them.don't listen to him!!! ON WITH THE FIC!!! *push Rei and Kai inside*
Rei & Kai: Hey!!!
Chapter 2- Unwanted (A/N: At last I have a song Nyahahaha!)
It was already ten-thirty and Rei's still in his little world. He seemed staying there forever to him.
*Flashback, Flashback* Rei's POV:
That day in the National tournament which was held in Japan I watched you fight against Tyson.. Starting that day I've become interested and curious about you..
Mr. D and I walked down to the arena to greet you and others and Mr.D had introduced you.. I looked at your features, those crimson orbs which now captivate me and those blue-marks in your face seemed to be like a warning to every person who dares to deal with you.but for me those blue-marks were the embellishing thing to add to your godlike attractiveness.
I
Then the Jazzman declared the National tournament winner and finalist. After that we casually met at one of the corridors inside that dome. Your usual self-stoic as ever. I greeted you congratulations and outstretched my hands for a friendly-congratulating-shake hands, but you just gazed at me then surprisingly.you took my hands and shook them.
You said "congrats" too but in a cold expressionless way, then I smiled and you walked away.that day I was more interested about you.
You're so attractive to evade for me but to those people who were afraid to look at those piercing crimson-blood-orbs and avoid those eyes as they can do, but I don't care how they act towards you.
I I wanted to show you .
I wanted to know you and show what "friend" means but no matter how hard I try you always blocked and protected yourself even in good things.
You always ignored me even I advised you I wouldn't listen or tell you anything unimportant. You still ignored me like an invisible thing though I care for you. Yet, you didn't care for anybody, you didn't want anybody to distract you. Here I am.but you still couldn't see me.
(That I'm so unwanted)
Why do you always do this to me Kai? Did you know that you've been always hurting me inside this martyr heart of mine.? Why couldn't you just see through me? How come you act like this like a living ice? Do you expect me to continue and suffer like this? I couldn't betray my heart, Kai. Even I wanted to hate you I couldn't.because my heart persisted me to love you.
~~~~End Rei's POV~~~~
Someone had place a hand on Rei's shoulder, making Rei jump out of his skin and making him gasp. Looking up to see who it was, Kai was gazing down upon him. Rei felt his face warm up, then started looking at the ground, as if suddenly interested at it.
"Hmm." Kai uttered, leaning his back to the railings.
"Um." Rei fiddled, feeling nervous and befuddled looking in every direction.
"Speak up."
"What?"
"I said speak up.Tell me."
"What?" Rei asked out of himself that he didn't know what was he asking now.
"Your problem..or it won't be solved." Kai looked outside turning his back to Rei.
"Why?" Rei's heartbeat skipped faster and he asked the stupidest question he could ask.
"Seriously Rei, I want to talk to you."
"About?"
"This."
Rei heartbeat skipped even faster than ever-is this the right time? "*Reveal it or never*" This was the hardest thing he could decide in his entire life.
I I ,You don't know me don't ignore me
Then the fact that how Kai would react if he tell him.What if he would kick him out of the team? All of his dreams and experiences would be nonsense! What if Kai wouldn't let him in?
"REVEAL it!" somewhere deep in his mind was screaming these words.
The silence took place between them. No one speak a word even a little sound.
Kai would just ignore him, he thought of that inside of his mind, cause Kai always does that to him and to others, but to others it's usual to them and didn't affect them too much.. But for that pain seemed like eternity inside him. He's just keeping it inside that martyr heart.
"Rei."
"No Kai! Even if I tell you'll just ignore it."
"Rei I'm trying to help here.."
"But you're not helping me Kai! You're hurting me!"
Kai was shocked. he couldn't believe that Rei said this to him. He's hurting Rei . How could he do this to the one who cares for him? He doesn't want Rei to be hurt by anyone but he himself was hurting the Chinese blader. It was like a ton of bricks was thrown at him.
"Kai, why do you always want me to endure this pain? Kai.why?" Rei asked, his voice was quavering and full of distress. Rei was in the brink of tears..
Kai opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. He sensed Rei bolt up from his seat. Kai turned around and saw Rei run away straight to the door.
"Shit!! Wait Rei!!" Kai called out but it was too late. Rei already slammed the door and ran off outside.
"Rei." All he could do was speak Rei's name. He felt guilty inside.he has to patent this situation.
~~~
Rei ran towards the elevator pressing the down button. The portal opened and he entered inside. It was a bundle of pain inside yet he still doesn't tell Kai what he really felt. The elevator led Rei to the ground floor. Few people were still working, not that he cared, as he got out the hotel and walked towards to the park.
It was dark, few number of posts lamps were lit, creating murkiness at the signal of nighttime. He sat on the bench near the fountain, facing the lagoon. There, he saw himself gaze at the reflection in the water, looking back at him with obvious pain on his features. Depressed, he buried his face between his knees.
I
I
,You don't want me there
"Rei look at me," Kai said cautiously, not wanting to hurt the other blader's feelings.
(*You don't want me inside your cold heart Kai, so why do you impede my problems?*)
Rei just gestured 'No'.
"Rei look at me."
"No Kai! Let's just mind our own businesses like you always say!"
"Darn Rei, you're making it harder!" Kai bellowed.
"You don't want me there Kai!" Rei snapped looking at Kai. His eyes were quite red because of crying.
Kai noticed Rei's eyes were red and he knew from his appearance that he cried. Rei buried his face again between his knees. Apparently Rei had cried, he hadn't controled it sooner than he expected. Kai merely watched Rei, but deep inside it hurts watching Rei pain like this.
I
He couldn't help just watching Rei like this! He has to do something! He shifted closer beside Rei, lifting Rei's face up to look at him. His face was flushed because of the warm tears that came down his face. Nothing more hurt that Kai saw Rei's warm tears fell down his face because of the pain he's been giving Rei-it was his fault. All the tears that Rei shed this time was because of him, and he felt guilty and ashamed at himself.
He wiped the tears away from Rei's eyes by his thumb. Rei was surprised what Kai had gestured to his shock. Kai drew him to his shoulders. All he could do was to lean upon that muscle tone shoulders. This was the first time.he could feel ease.ever since his suffering started.
I
"I.I'm sorry," Kai uttered.
Rei looked up questioningly to Kai.
"For hurting you."
Is this real? Rei thought to himself .or just an illusion?
"Kai."
"Hm."
This was the perfect time to tell him, however he would act to this.
"I.I.I love you," Rei stuttered blushing furiously.
Kai was stunned as he just looked at Rei, his mouth was agape, speechless, shaking his brain for a word to come out then he found the perfect words.
"I.feel the same.."
Rei was thunderstruck. Kai felt the same to him. is that possible?! He couldn't believe what was happening right now.
"You.you.mean"
"Yes.Loveyoutoo" Kai said rapidly looking at Rei who was in real shock. Kai was blushing feverishly, tinting his face obviously red contrasting his blue marks.
Rei felt his heart jump and down. He never felt this happy before it was.ooh perfect and leaning to Kai's shoulder means a lot to him, just feeling the warmth of his body. Kai draw Rei's face closer to his own planting a tender kiss to the younger blader soft lips not caring how Rei would react.
Rei was totally shock as in full shock that he stiffened to that kiss but he inwardly wanted it again. Ohhh..really perfect. Kai parted his lips from Rei who's still in utter shock.
"You're so inevitably beautiful" Kai stated amorously.
" ..." Rei was speechless he doesn't know what to say.
"You ok?"
"Yeah.Do.you.really mean it?"
"I do sincerely mean it."
"And that."
"That kiss was true."
".I couldn't just believe this was real."
"It was real Rei.We should better get back, it's getting late."
Kai and Rei stood up, both of them was happy inwardly close to each other. Now they could slumber serenely without any qualms inside their minds.
~~~
Haha at last I finished this chapter! It took me longer time in front of the computer typing this all over the whole day at least. So what d'you think about this chapter??? Good no.impossible, Fair.probably quite not, It sucks. Yeah maybe. blasted yeah this is the right answer! Weeh.. Self- pessimism well.I can say near future I'm not a psychic but I feel that this fic won't get reviews huhuhu..
Kai & Rei: ¬_¬; *scowls*
Y2cd: Fine I'll shut up I just wish someone will review.I HOPE
So see 'ya all again next chapter I already found a song for the next chapter so R+R Unwanted by Avril Lavigne. ^-^V
% Zai jian% LOL
Chapter 1- Somewhere I Belong
The BladeBreakers was practicing ages ago in the park. Tyson and Max were fighting against each others blades, Kai was sitting aloof from them on the bench, crossed arms and legs, obviously his normal position, stoic and cold as ever while Kenny was sitting on the other bench typing and Rei was gaping blankly at his blade like a weirdo.
[when this began] I had nothing to say And I get lost in the nothingness Inside of me
Rei was lost in track of time just gaping at Driger for a long time. Kai just watched his two teammates command their beyblade.
"Tyson don't be so carefree in your defense you're giving Max an opportunity to win,'' Kai mentioned his teammate's errors.
"I know that,'' Tyson retorted back.
"Hmph.brat," Kai garbled under his breath. He noticed Rei who was under a tree leaning his back on the trunk and gaping at his blade. (*Hmm.what on earth he's doing, he looks stupid*) Kai stared at Rei bewilderedly. Rei was still in that position when he noticed someone was staring at him. He looked around and noticed Kai's eyes upon him.
(*.Why he's staring at me? Do I have a dirt on my face? Oh goodie he thinks I'm nuts.*)
" Yeah! I won! No hard feelings bud, you're just unlucky today," Max said after jumping up on the air. Rei's attention was drawn by Max cheering.
"..Ok fine.sheesh.Hey guys let's go to the restaurant nearby, I'm starving," Tyson said while picking up his blade.
"Yep. Me too, after that challenging fight.. Rei, Kai are you coming along?''
"Uh .yes," Rei alleged perplexingly "Kai, you coming?'' Kai just nodded lazily.
"Alright let's go!!!" Tyson screeched blissfully.
~~~
Rei didn't discern the inquisitive stares of his teammates.
[I was confused] and I live it all to find that I'm not the only person with these things on mind [inside of me]
(*. I don't understand why I'm feeling this towards Kai, I know that I'm such a fool feeling this emotion towards the emotionless bastard.but I can't fight this feeling anymore.It's driving me crazy when I try to.*)
But all they can see the words revealed Is the only real thing that I've got left to feel
"Rei, are you alright? You barely touched your food," Max asked agitatedly concerned for his friend.
"Um. yeah I'm fine, just no appetite," Rei told Max and shoved away his plate.
"Are you sure you're alright Rei?" Kenny asked again.
"Yeah, tell us if you're fine we're just worried about you," Tyson joined in.
"I said I'm fine guys no need to worry about me," Rei persisted hoping that would work.
"Ok, just tell us Rei if you have a problem 'k?" Tyson said reassuringly.
Rei just nodded as a response. He just drank the lemonade that's all he took to fill his stomach at their lunch.
~~~
They returned back to their hotel where they stayed in; in the room where Kai and Rei shared you'd merely hear the sound of the clock and nothing else more. Rei was looking blankly again at the ceiling.
[nothing to lose] Just stuck, hollow and alone And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own
(*This is really foolish .they're already becoming chary any minute now. this emotion is affecting me a lot.I can't conceal and struggle against this feeling inside.I have to reveal this one day but how?.What will he say.? I have to reveal this before I go insane.*)
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long [ erase the pain 'til it's gone]
(*I wish this is not real, I wish this emotion will vanish in the thin air faster than the blink of my eyes .this is so crazy, so foolish I'm not myself anymore.I'm the foolish Rei falling because of that emotionless bastard*)
I wanna heal, I wanna close something real I wanna find I've wanted all wanted all along Somewhere I belong
(*.This is really giving me a bad headache. I don't want to be like this always.I'll be insane if I stay like this forever.I have to reveal it.I don't care what will he say or act the most important is I'll reveal this emotions but.how.?*)
And I've got nothing to say I can't believe I didn't fall right down on my face [I was confused]
"How? How? I need to find out." Rei asked himself repetitively. "How?"
"How, what?" A cold and monotone voice said (A/N: hmm. camera focus pls.and drum rolls)
Rei was alarmed by the voice and when he looked around, he saw the stoic leader leaning his back at the opened door of the washroom and crossed arms as usual.
"Nothing at all." Rei feigned bluntly.
"You're not good at lying Rei, so don't expect I'll believe your excuses," Kai told Rei impersonally
"Oh.mmm.yeah," Rei stuttered.
Looking everywhere to find That it's not the way I had imagined it all in my mind
"Nervous? Don't be I'm not gonna eat you alive," Kai told smirking at Rei.
"I'm not nervous who told you so?" Rei objected.
"Myself. Care to say your problem? You're acting unusual today," Kai told him while closing the portal of the washroom and impending where Rei was.
(*Now, what does he want? He's making my heartbeat faster every time he's near.*)
Kai sat near the edge of Rei's bed.
(*He's beautiful in this close distance*)
"You didn't answer my question yet," Kai said in his monotone voice. Even he has the same feeling towards the Chinese blader his emotion still hid under his mask.
"I have no problem Kai. I'm fine," Rei tried to fibbed again but for the observant leader it didn't work.
"I told you Rei, you're not gonna deceive me."
"I don't need someone's help to crack this problem out," Rei stated seriously.
"Tch.I'm not trying to help Rei I'm just asking you," Kai told to Rei frigidly.they both glare with each other.seeking feelings and emotions but as expected Kai always block all emotions inside of him.
Rei looked away.
(*Waah! Help he's still glaring at me like a disgusting stuff sort of that!*)
/Shut up kid, I'm trying to have a nice catnap here!/
(*You're so mean Drig, I need your help!*)
/Wait until I get a nice catnap ok.'till next time ne./
(*.If I had a chance.I would straggle this tiger and hit him on his head.*)
"Hmph." Kai stood up and walked away closing the door in front of Rei.
''Oh what the heck.he walked away from me.watashi wa bakeru." Rei whispered to himself.
[so what am I]
What do I have but negativity
The afternoon hours passed and the BladeBreakers just enjoyed themselves but Rei was still at his own little world.. The sun had set off and night started to crawl up the sky, the moon had appeared with her daughters--the stars glinting upon the creatures below them and the moon serving the light she gave to all the creatures below..
Rei was sitting on the chair at the balcony enjoying the night breeze and again in his own world..
Cause I can't trust to find the way
(*How? How? How???????? This bothers me a lot..... I think my head is gonna blow...*)
The same question passed through the Rei's mind repetitively..
(*How?????? How???????? How??????*)
~~~
During the supper, Tyson really enjoyed while Max whined to Tyson to leave some food for him and Kenny.. Rei has still no appetite to eat his food, Kai stayed stoic as ever but he's not mad at Rei.
Everyone is looking at me
"You ok Rei?" Max asked Rei.
"Yeah. Thanks.just no appetite," Rei said looking at Max.
"Again!?? Lemme eat your food!" Tyson shouted delightedly.
"Tyson?!" Max whined.
"You're hopeless Tyson.. Rei are you sick or what? You're going to be lighter than before if you don't eat," Kenny said to Rei as far as he's concerned.
Kai just glanced at Rei..
[nothing to lose] nothing to gain, hollow and alone and the fault is my own, and the fault is my own and the fault is my own
(*.He always ignore me.he doesn't know I'm having a hard time because of him.. I'm really foolish that I had feelings to this frigid stunner . But, this is my own fault I gave in to him. *)
"Hey Rei?! Buddy? What's the matter?" Tyson asked.
"Er.yeah.what.?" Rei said uncomprehendingly, his mind not really registering well.
".Rei are you sure you're ok?" Kenny asked the same question.
"Yes.just got lost in track, hehe.."
"Hhm." Max placed his hand over Rei's bandana and his other hand to his neck. "Your temperature is same as mine. What's the matter with you Rei?" Max said putting away his hand.
"I'm fine guys. Nothing to worry about," Rei said tolerantly to Max.
"You sure Rei?" Kenny and Tyson asked in unison.
"I told you guys, I'm fine."
"Hh.." Kai muttered under his breath.
"Rei?" Max uttered, his voice expressing concern and worry.
"I said I'm fine." Rei's voice rose a notch higher than usual.
"We're just concerned Rei," Tyson said reasoning out for how Rei had acted.
"I know Tyson." Rei said with his voice now raw.
"Care to share your problems Rei maybe we can help you. You're our friend Rei, you don't have to keep your problem from us, you're not Kai you know," Max said counseling Rei.
Rei was taken aback because of Max had said to him.
"I know Max but.I can crack this problem out by myself," Rei said genuinely and hostile.
"Rei you need our support and help."
"Max you won't understand it! I need to be alone in other things without anyone's help!"
"Guys.guys don't argue" Kenny interrupted.
"You're acting like Kai, Rei!" Max voice rose a notch higher.
"Max. I'm not acting like Kai, this is me Max not anybody else. I just need time and space for myself," Rei's voice was piercing and plain.
"Whoa buddies stop arguing don't start a quarrel!" Tyson said worrying about his friends. This was the first time that Rei and Max argued..
".Right Rei. If you need my help I'm just here by your side," Max voice changes to placid now.
Rei smiled and that clears that they're not mad at each other. He stood up and walked away..
"Phew. That's a close to a quarrel," Tyson sigh in relief.
"Yeah, you're right Tyson," Kenny joined.
"Kai, aren't you concerned about Rei?" Max asked.
"You heard him. He needs time and space for himself," Kai said as usual in his monotone voice but deep deep inside his feelings he's concerned for the Chinese blader.
Max just acquiesce to what Kai said and they just continued eating their supper and when they ended their supper they went towards their own rooms.
~~~
Kai entered the room closing the door quietly.he looked at the balcony and saw his teammate who passed through the barriers of his heart and reached the emotions hiding within it. He walked towards the bed and sat there watching his teammate carefully.
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long [erase all the pain 'til it's gone]
Rei looked at the sky, wind blowing his bangs away from his face, wishing the wind would take him away too and just vanish and not exist anymore above the cruel world he's living on right now for sixteen years. He wanted to feel numb.
I want to heal, I wanna feel like I'm close to something real I wanna let find something I've wanted all along Somewhere I belong
Right. All he wanted was to be dead, numb at things he's suffering in his life.. But if he didn't hold on to hope he won't reveal his emotions to the other blader. All his feelings for his leader would stay hidden and be a prisoner of his heart.all his emotions would make no sense.
I will never know myself until I do this on my own And I will never feel anything else 'til my wounds are healed
He'd just help himself no matter what risk he would take to reveal his true emotions to his leader, no matter how his leader would react if he reveal his feelings to him.. He have to get through this dilemma.
I will never be anything 'til I break away from me I will break away and find myself today
His heart retaliated against his mind that he shouldn't fall for his leader but his heart would object to what his mind was telling. The greatest foe of Rei was himself, he had no possibility to win.. He wouldn't be free from his old self if he will not break away.. Moon and stars stared down at him, staring at him for being a fool. Rei had kept blaming himself for being an imprudent idiot but it's too late now to blame himself. His emotions for his leader overpowered his heart and mind.thus he's afraid to reveal his feelings.
No progress will happen. He'd forever stay stuck in this chasm of his emotions.
~~~
I wanna heal, I wanna feel What I thought was never real I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long [erase all the pain 'til it's gone]
All Kai can do was watch keenly his teammate. He couldn't do anything but watch and stare. He's afraid that if he reveal his true emotions the Chinese blader wouldn't return his love for him.. He's tired of being alone again.. All he loved deserted him.. He's afraid to try again, afraid to be alone again in the midst of the dark.. He needed someone who really cares for him, fight his fears away, someone who can return his love..
I wanna heal, I wanna feel Like I'm close to something real I wanna find something I've wanted all along Somewhere I belong
He felt like he's impalpable. Nobody cared for him because he's an emotionless jerk. Everyone thought he's not able to feel anything. Pain, grief, solitude and .love. He's still a human even to the other people, he pertains to a stone, emotionless and cares for himself only.. But all changed when he became close to his Chinese teammate..
I wanna heal, I wanna feel Like I'm somewhere I belong I wanna heal, I wanna feel Like I'm somewhere I belong Somewhere I belong
He wanted a place where he can be loved, comforted and to be cared for.. Somewhere in the Chinese blader's heart.. He was sure he can have all what he wanted in there..
A place in Rei's heart..
~~~~~~~~~~~
phooey. ok chapter one is done hope you like it peeps I really hope. well the title is revelation cause I used 'reveal' many times got the point if anyone wants to point-out my mistakes in grammar you're free to do it and other mistakes cause my nationality is different told 'ya that peeps. If anyone wants to send feedback in my eadd here it is: y2cd_yinyang@yahoo.com. sigh hope I will have reviews.I'll be happy if I have seven reviews to twenty.watashi wa bakeru- means I'm stupid.so see 'ya peeps next time promise I'll be posting as immediately as soon as possible as I could maybe once a week every chapter.
% zai jian % lol
Well I'm back again! Wei again! Thanks for those who reviewed (in advance if there's someone) I really appreciate it. It's hard to ponder a song to relate to my musings and ideas so long to type this fic again. That the actors really enjoyed especially ¬_¬. Mr. Sourpuss would you mind saying it??
Kai: *Glares* Of course I enjoy it! No emotional stuffs. Hh. But you killed my enjoyment darn..
Y2cd: I don't care, however, you need to work for me and for your beloved partner here.*grabs Rei*
Rei: Whaa!
Kai: *blush* ..He's not my beloved partner..silly!!!
Rei: What do you mean "beloved" eh?
Y2cd: Rei I'll explain it to you *drags Rei* .
Kai: Wait! NOOOO!! *blush*
Y2cd: Haha say it or I'll tell Rei that...
Kai: OK! OK just don't tell him!!!
Rei: ?? ._.
Kai: This means the authoress doesn't own Beyblade cause all of us will die because of overwork.
Y2cd: What the heck are you telling them.don't listen to him!!! ON WITH THE FIC!!! *push Rei and Kai inside*
Rei & Kai: Hey!!!
Chapter 2- Unwanted (A/N: At last I have a song Nyahahaha!)
It was already ten-thirty and Rei's still in his little world. He seemed staying there forever to him.
*Flashback, Flashback* Rei's POV:
That day in the National tournament which was held in Japan I watched you fight against Tyson.. Starting that day I've become interested and curious about you..
Mr. D and I walked down to the arena to greet you and others and Mr.D had introduced you.. I looked at your features, those crimson orbs which now captivate me and those blue-marks in your face seemed to be like a warning to every person who dares to deal with you.but for me those blue-marks were the embellishing thing to add to your godlike attractiveness.
I
Then the Jazzman declared the National tournament winner and finalist. After that we casually met at one of the corridors inside that dome. Your usual self-stoic as ever. I greeted you congratulations and outstretched my hands for a friendly-congratulating-shake hands, but you just gazed at me then surprisingly.you took my hands and shook them.
You said "congrats" too but in a cold expressionless way, then I smiled and you walked away.that day I was more interested about you.
You're so attractive to evade for me but to those people who were afraid to look at those piercing crimson-blood-orbs and avoid those eyes as they can do, but I don't care how they act towards you.
I I wanted to show you .
I wanted to know you and show what "friend" means but no matter how hard I try you always blocked and protected yourself even in good things.
You always ignored me even I advised you I wouldn't listen or tell you anything unimportant. You still ignored me like an invisible thing though I care for you. Yet, you didn't care for anybody, you didn't want anybody to distract you. Here I am.but you still couldn't see me.
(That I'm so unwanted)
Why do you always do this to me Kai? Did you know that you've been always hurting me inside this martyr heart of mine.? Why couldn't you just see through me? How come you act like this like a living ice? Do you expect me to continue and suffer like this? I couldn't betray my heart, Kai. Even I wanted to hate you I couldn't.because my heart persisted me to love you.
~~~~End Rei's POV~~~~
Someone had place a hand on Rei's shoulder, making Rei jump out of his skin and making him gasp. Looking up to see who it was, Kai was gazing down upon him. Rei felt his face warm up, then started looking at the ground, as if suddenly interested at it.
"Hmm." Kai uttered, leaning his back to the railings.
"Um." Rei fiddled, feeling nervous and befuddled looking in every direction.
"Speak up."
"What?"
"I said speak up.Tell me."
"What?" Rei asked out of himself that he didn't know what was he asking now.
"Your problem..or it won't be solved." Kai looked outside turning his back to Rei.
"Why?" Rei's heartbeat skipped faster and he asked the stupidest question he could ask.
"Seriously Rei, I want to talk to you."
"About?"
"This."
Rei heartbeat skipped even faster than ever-is this the right time? "*Reveal it or never*" This was the hardest thing he could decide in his entire life.
I I ,You don't know me don't ignore me
Then the fact that how Kai would react if he tell him.What if he would kick him out of the team? All of his dreams and experiences would be nonsense! What if Kai wouldn't let him in?
"REVEAL it!" somewhere deep in his mind was screaming these words.
The silence took place between them. No one speak a word even a little sound.
Kai would just ignore him, he thought of that inside of his mind, cause Kai always does that to him and to others, but to others it's usual to them and didn't affect them too much.. But for that pain seemed like eternity inside him. He's just keeping it inside that martyr heart.
"Rei."
"No Kai! Even if I tell you'll just ignore it."
"Rei I'm trying to help here.."
"But you're not helping me Kai! You're hurting me!"
Kai was shocked. he couldn't believe that Rei said this to him. He's hurting Rei . How could he do this to the one who cares for him? He doesn't want Rei to be hurt by anyone but he himself was hurting the Chinese blader. It was like a ton of bricks was thrown at him.
"Kai, why do you always want me to endure this pain? Kai.why?" Rei asked, his voice was quavering and full of distress. Rei was in the brink of tears..
Kai opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. He sensed Rei bolt up from his seat. Kai turned around and saw Rei run away straight to the door.
"Shit!! Wait Rei!!" Kai called out but it was too late. Rei already slammed the door and ran off outside.
"Rei." All he could do was speak Rei's name. He felt guilty inside.he has to patent this situation.
~~~
Rei ran towards the elevator pressing the down button. The portal opened and he entered inside. It was a bundle of pain inside yet he still doesn't tell Kai what he really felt. The elevator led Rei to the ground floor. Few people were still working, not that he cared, as he got out the hotel and walked towards to the park.
It was dark, few number of posts lamps were lit, creating murkiness at the signal of nighttime. He sat on the bench near the fountain, facing the lagoon. There, he saw himself gaze at the reflection in the water, looking back at him with obvious pain on his features. Depressed, he buried his face between his knees.
I
I
,You don't want me there
"Rei look at me," Kai said cautiously, not wanting to hurt the other blader's feelings.
(*You don't want me inside your cold heart Kai, so why do you impede my problems?*)
Rei just gestured 'No'.
"Rei look at me."
"No Kai! Let's just mind our own businesses like you always say!"
"Darn Rei, you're making it harder!" Kai bellowed.
"You don't want me there Kai!" Rei snapped looking at Kai. His eyes were quite red because of crying.
Kai noticed Rei's eyes were red and he knew from his appearance that he cried. Rei buried his face again between his knees. Apparently Rei had cried, he hadn't controled it sooner than he expected. Kai merely watched Rei, but deep inside it hurts watching Rei pain like this.
I
He couldn't help just watching Rei like this! He has to do something! He shifted closer beside Rei, lifting Rei's face up to look at him. His face was flushed because of the warm tears that came down his face. Nothing more hurt that Kai saw Rei's warm tears fell down his face because of the pain he's been giving Rei-it was his fault. All the tears that Rei shed this time was because of him, and he felt guilty and ashamed at himself.
He wiped the tears away from Rei's eyes by his thumb. Rei was surprised what Kai had gestured to his shock. Kai drew him to his shoulders. All he could do was to lean upon that muscle tone shoulders. This was the first time.he could feel ease.ever since his suffering started.
I
"I.I'm sorry," Kai uttered.
Rei looked up questioningly to Kai.
"For hurting you."
Is this real? Rei thought to himself .or just an illusion?
"Kai."
"Hm."
This was the perfect time to tell him, however he would act to this.
"I.I.I love you," Rei stuttered blushing furiously.
Kai was stunned as he just looked at Rei, his mouth was agape, speechless, shaking his brain for a word to come out then he found the perfect words.
"I.feel the same.."
Rei was thunderstruck. Kai felt the same to him. is that possible?! He couldn't believe what was happening right now.
"You.you.mean"
"Yes.Loveyoutoo" Kai said rapidly looking at Rei who was in real shock. Kai was blushing feverishly, tinting his face obviously red contrasting his blue marks.
Rei felt his heart jump and down. He never felt this happy before it was.ooh perfect and leaning to Kai's shoulder means a lot to him, just feeling the warmth of his body. Kai draw Rei's face closer to his own planting a tender kiss to the younger blader soft lips not caring how Rei would react.
Rei was totally shock as in full shock that he stiffened to that kiss but he inwardly wanted it again. Ohhh..really perfect. Kai parted his lips from Rei who's still in utter shock.
"You're so inevitably beautiful" Kai stated amorously.
" ..." Rei was speechless he doesn't know what to say.
"You ok?"
"Yeah.Do.you.really mean it?"
"I do sincerely mean it."
"And that."
"That kiss was true."
".I couldn't just believe this was real."
"It was real Rei.We should better get back, it's getting late."
Kai and Rei stood up, both of them was happy inwardly close to each other. Now they could slumber serenely without any qualms inside their minds.
~~~
Haha at last I finished this chapter! It took me longer time in front of the computer typing this all over the whole day at least. So what d'you think about this chapter??? Good no.impossible, Fair.probably quite not, It sucks. Yeah maybe. blasted yeah this is the right answer! Weeh.. Self- pessimism well.I can say near future I'm not a psychic but I feel that this fic won't get reviews huhuhu..
Kai & Rei: ¬_¬; *scowls*
Y2cd: Fine I'll shut up I just wish someone will review.I HOPE
So see 'ya all again next chapter I already found a song for the next chapter so R+R Unwanted by Avril Lavigne. ^-^V
% Zai jian% LOL