"Severus?" I said as I walked into his office. "Severus the
Dumbledore would like to see you in the lounge." I looked around the office
for him. When I looked behind his desk he seemed to be crouched in the
little gap between it. "Severus are you alright?" I asked looking worried.
"Oh I am quite fine Minerva!" he said looking up at me. "Would you care to join me?" he gestured to an empty spot on the floor.
"Umm, Severus, the Headmaster wants you in the lounge immediately. Follow me." I held out my hand to help him up but he just looked at it in wonder. "Take my hand Severus." I commanded him. He yanked my hand and started to shake it.
"Hello! I am Severus Snape. Please lead me to the master of your head." He said as if I did not understand English. I pulled him up and carefully walked him to the teacher's lounge.
"Ahh! Severus. Just who I needed to speak with." Dumbledore said calmly, his eyes twinkling under his half-moon spectacles. "Would you please join the teachers and me in our meeting?" he gestured to the door to the lounge.
When we went in, I saw all of the teachers gathered at a long table that sat in the middle of the room. Dumbledore sat at the head of it. I took the empty seat next to his. Snape kept standing as if he was waiting for someone to ask him to sit. When Dumbledore did so, he just replied "I would much rather stand thanks."
"Okay. Now, Severus please tell us what is on your mind." Dumbledore said smiling. Snape just looked at him.
"Well, I've been thinkin." He said finally.
"About what?" I asked partially wondering what his answer would be.
"About Anna-Banana-Marshmallow-Mush of course! I think she should be a cat!" he said as if the answer was obvious.
"Umm, who is Anna-Banana-Marshmallow-Mush?" I asked partially entertained.
"Why are you asking me when you can ask the Greatness?" he said looking flabbergasted as if my question had been stupid.
"May I meet her?" Dumbledore said with a pleasant smile on his face.
"No," Snape said simply. He looked at Poppy and asked her to dance. Before she could say anything, Snape had her swinging around as he led her in a rather fast waltz. I stared in bafflement. My eyes watered as I tried to restrain a laugh. Then he started singing a song. I could make out every word:
I love to dance,
I love to sing,
I also like,
The word Ping!
My hearts is glad, My hearts afloat,
I fell as if
I'm on a boat.
Side to side,
Front to back,
In and out of a
Brown sack.
I couldn't help it anymore. I let out a laugh, followed by many other teachers. Dumbledore seemed to be clapping along with Snape's little tune. When Snape finally let go of Poppy, he looked at Dumbledore. Dumbledore just looked right back as if this was normal.
"May I touch your head?" Snape asked Dumbledore, looking at his head with wonder.
"Of course!" Dumbledore said with a smile. Snape ran over and poked Dumbledore on the top of his head. After he did so, he put a hand over his mouth and started giggling.
"Severus? Why are you acting so strange?" I finally asked him.
"It's the Beans!!!" he responded. Then he looked over at me and started to poke me on my shoulder. I politely asked him to stop and he did. He walked over to the fireplace and sat down. Dumbledore followed and sat next to him. I heard mumbles but I could not make anything of what they were saying out. Finally, Dumbledore sat back in his original chair and confronted the teachers.
"I think he is acting absolutely fine. He has just taken a potion that is making him this way." He said casually.
"Is there anything we can do for him?" Flitwick asked worriedly.
"Why would you want to do anything to him? I personally like him better this way." I said matter-of-factly. Poppy gave me a look of disapproval. I ignored her and went on. "All of you cannot possibly say that you don't like Severus this way." I said nonchalantly. Some of them nodded agreeably.
Severus got up from his spot in front of the fire and came back towards the group. He had a distorted expression on his face.
"I know you are talking about me." He said. "And I would just like to say that I will not be a part of you little mind games. I would like to go lick a chicken now! Please excuse me." She grabbed his knee and licked it.
"Severus, please stop licking your knee!" I ordered him.
"Ahh, but you are wrong my little friend, or rather tall friend. This is not my knee! It is Bo-Bo-Bumper, the Ventriloquist. Look at him! Isn't she wonderful!" he said admiring his knee.
"Well, umm, Severus? Why don't I escort you, and Bo-Bo-Bumper, back to your office?" I took his hand and guided him out of the door. We passed many students on the way, all with dazed looks at Snape.
When we arrived at the door of his office I opened it for him and turned to leave. Before I did, though, I asked again, "Why are you so strange?"
Snape looked at me and simply said,
"It's the Beans!"
"Oh I am quite fine Minerva!" he said looking up at me. "Would you care to join me?" he gestured to an empty spot on the floor.
"Umm, Severus, the Headmaster wants you in the lounge immediately. Follow me." I held out my hand to help him up but he just looked at it in wonder. "Take my hand Severus." I commanded him. He yanked my hand and started to shake it.
"Hello! I am Severus Snape. Please lead me to the master of your head." He said as if I did not understand English. I pulled him up and carefully walked him to the teacher's lounge.
"Ahh! Severus. Just who I needed to speak with." Dumbledore said calmly, his eyes twinkling under his half-moon spectacles. "Would you please join the teachers and me in our meeting?" he gestured to the door to the lounge.
When we went in, I saw all of the teachers gathered at a long table that sat in the middle of the room. Dumbledore sat at the head of it. I took the empty seat next to his. Snape kept standing as if he was waiting for someone to ask him to sit. When Dumbledore did so, he just replied "I would much rather stand thanks."
"Okay. Now, Severus please tell us what is on your mind." Dumbledore said smiling. Snape just looked at him.
"Well, I've been thinkin." He said finally.
"About what?" I asked partially wondering what his answer would be.
"About Anna-Banana-Marshmallow-Mush of course! I think she should be a cat!" he said as if the answer was obvious.
"Umm, who is Anna-Banana-Marshmallow-Mush?" I asked partially entertained.
"Why are you asking me when you can ask the Greatness?" he said looking flabbergasted as if my question had been stupid.
"May I meet her?" Dumbledore said with a pleasant smile on his face.
"No," Snape said simply. He looked at Poppy and asked her to dance. Before she could say anything, Snape had her swinging around as he led her in a rather fast waltz. I stared in bafflement. My eyes watered as I tried to restrain a laugh. Then he started singing a song. I could make out every word:
I love to dance,
I love to sing,
I also like,
The word Ping!
My hearts is glad, My hearts afloat,
I fell as if
I'm on a boat.
Side to side,
Front to back,
In and out of a
Brown sack.
I couldn't help it anymore. I let out a laugh, followed by many other teachers. Dumbledore seemed to be clapping along with Snape's little tune. When Snape finally let go of Poppy, he looked at Dumbledore. Dumbledore just looked right back as if this was normal.
"May I touch your head?" Snape asked Dumbledore, looking at his head with wonder.
"Of course!" Dumbledore said with a smile. Snape ran over and poked Dumbledore on the top of his head. After he did so, he put a hand over his mouth and started giggling.
"Severus? Why are you acting so strange?" I finally asked him.
"It's the Beans!!!" he responded. Then he looked over at me and started to poke me on my shoulder. I politely asked him to stop and he did. He walked over to the fireplace and sat down. Dumbledore followed and sat next to him. I heard mumbles but I could not make anything of what they were saying out. Finally, Dumbledore sat back in his original chair and confronted the teachers.
"I think he is acting absolutely fine. He has just taken a potion that is making him this way." He said casually.
"Is there anything we can do for him?" Flitwick asked worriedly.
"Why would you want to do anything to him? I personally like him better this way." I said matter-of-factly. Poppy gave me a look of disapproval. I ignored her and went on. "All of you cannot possibly say that you don't like Severus this way." I said nonchalantly. Some of them nodded agreeably.
Severus got up from his spot in front of the fire and came back towards the group. He had a distorted expression on his face.
"I know you are talking about me." He said. "And I would just like to say that I will not be a part of you little mind games. I would like to go lick a chicken now! Please excuse me." She grabbed his knee and licked it.
"Severus, please stop licking your knee!" I ordered him.
"Ahh, but you are wrong my little friend, or rather tall friend. This is not my knee! It is Bo-Bo-Bumper, the Ventriloquist. Look at him! Isn't she wonderful!" he said admiring his knee.
"Well, umm, Severus? Why don't I escort you, and Bo-Bo-Bumper, back to your office?" I took his hand and guided him out of the door. We passed many students on the way, all with dazed looks at Snape.
When we arrived at the door of his office I opened it for him and turned to leave. Before I did, though, I asked again, "Why are you so strange?"
Snape looked at me and simply said,
"It's the Beans!"