The Ties That Bind
Chapter 3
She led him with a few discreet pushes and pulls through the halls until they reached the upper floors of the Palace. She glanced both ways before pressing her thumb to the lock on her chambers and the door slid open. Her stomach in knots, unsure of why she'd brought him here, she led him through and locked it behind her.
Her room was more a connection of three rooms. A large dressing room, a day room with a huge desk, her wardrobe along the connecting wall to her bedroom, and assorted furniture. A table with four chairs, a sofa and chair were just a few of the fixtures. A huge balcony let her view both the palace gardens and the city below. Her bedroom was to the right, the refresher tucked in the back corner. Everything was neat and tidy, save for her desk.
She turned to look at him, suddenly nervous.
He looked around briefly before gazing down at her. A blush stained her cheeks as she looked up at him, her eyes wide. He could tell she was unsure of what she'd just done. He smiled at her and pulled her into his arms, tucking her under his chin. "I've missed you," he told her softly as she slid her arms around his waist. He leaned back against the door and held her gently, but firmly, ducking his head and inhaling the scent of her hair. Addicting like glitterstim, it held it's own fresh, cloying scent. "You smell like the wind and the rain, Padmé." He told her softly, his breath sliding over her ear.
She shuddered in his grasp, "Oh Ani," she whispered softly, hugging him tightly. He hugged her back, reluctantly letting her go when she finally stepped away. "I've missed you too. Look at us, you'd think we hadn't seen each other in years or something. Sit," she waved him to a seat and he stretched out on the couch as she took a seat at the other end, curling her legs up and wrapping her arms around them, looking at him, "So tell me, what's it like learning to be a Jedi? We haven't talked, and even then it was for so short a time, in three years."
He hesitated, "I'm not sure if I'm supposed to talk about it. The Jedi, as I'm sure you've guessed, are very secretive about it." He met her eager gaze, "I could show you if you like."
"Show me?"
He nodded. "You'll have to trust me though, Angel."
She smiled at his nickname for her and nodded, "I do. Implicitly it would seem. How would you show me?"
He leaned forward, grasping her hands in his, "I would have to form a... a Force bond, temporary of course, between us where I could show you all I've done over the last nine years."
She raised one eyebrow, "And what would this Force bond do, other than that? Not to mention how is it done?"
"I'm not really sure," he blushed, "I've never tried it with anyone before. I know the basics of how to establish it and how to end it, but I don't know what else it might do to either you or me."
She searched his eyes, "Do you believe you can do this, Ani?"
He nodded, "I know I can, but you have to trust me completely and let me in without fighting, can you do that?"
She grinned, "I can't seem to get you out. Go ahead, try it."
He reached out to gently place his forehead against hers as she slid towards him, her legs over his lap. She closed her eyes. "What happens if this end up permanent?"
He stopped for a fraction of a second, taking a deep breath to find his concentration, "Then I'll know your every emotion, and you'll know mine. We'll be able to communicate without words..."
"So like now, only in our minds," she teased.
He chuckled softly before stretching out to find the Force surrounding him, *You always understood me best, Angel, whether or not I was speaking*
She jerked as his voice spoke softly in her mind, *Ani? Wow, even in my mind he makes me shiver.*
He chuckled softly, *I heard that, Angel. Guard your thoughts well, I'll hear anything you think while we're connected.*
She blushed, but his eyes were closed and, though he couldn't see it, he certainly felt her embarrassment. Attempting to relax her he added, *And you do the same to me, so there's nothing to be shy about.*
She giggled, relaxing in his hold as scenes started to filter through her mind. Scenes of Anakin, feelings and all, trying to meditate but being distracted by memories of his mother, his friends and most of all her. She saw him go through the trials of learning all the basic lessons Jedi learn. She smiled a little as his class in politics brought up the Trade Federation Boycott of Naboo, focusing on her role in the class. She could feel his smugness, his gratitude, as her picture was distributed. Both as a Handmaiden and as the Queen. She saw him, later that same night, frame the Handmaiden picture and place it on his bedside table.
*Do you...*
*Yes. I still have that picture*
She smiled at his response, watching him grow in his mind, seeing things from his point of view. She saw his monthly hair cut, stifling a giggle when she felt his indignation. He might have been freed, no longer a slave on Tatooine, but he was still enslaved to the Jedi's rules.
*Oh no, they're not bonds, Ani, they're-*
*-there for my protection* he finished her thought, *I know, Ami, but...*
*Ami?*
She felt his sudden shyness, *It's what I call you in my mind, Angel, when it's just you and I-*
*-which is more often than you ever thought it would be. Oh Ani, I had no idea. You can call me that you know, if you like.*
She felt his pleasure, felt him being humbled with her permission and couldn't help but marvel as his memories accelerated, racing through his lightsaber training, his frustration and desperation as he thought of his mother, Qui-Gon and finally her. His focus seemed to stay on her more often than not as the years passed. In the next hour, she saw his whole training pass before her eyes, and gained some insight as to his feelings. She saw herself as she was three years ago, felt the strength of warmth coming from him, an encompassing, unconditional acceptance and-
*That's enough*
*Wait! What is it you're not showing me?*
Amidala gasped for air as he released her, falling back against the cushions. Her vision was blurry and she blinked rapidly, trying to get her focus back. She wasn't sure, but she thought she heard him curse.
"Ani?"
He closed his eyes against the confusion rolling off her, trying to block it off. He could feel her concern, and swallowed hard. "Don't, Ami. Please."
Her vision slowly focused on him and she was alarmed to see him curled up in the corner of the couch. His face was buried in his knees and he was shaking. Alarmed she reached a hand out to him, "Anakin?"
"Don't!"
She froze. How had he known...?
"How can you ask that?" his whisper was ragged, almost painful, "I just did something I never should have done. Padmé, I'm so sorry."
She looked at him confused, dropping her hand to the couch. What had he done? What was so awful that he wouldn't look at her, wouldn't allow-
"-you to touch me." He looked up, his eyes holding a guarded, remorseful look, "I'm sorry. So sorry. I managed to forge a stronger bond than I was going to. I can hear your thoughts-"
"-And I can hear yours." Her voice was small, her eyes wide with shock as his thoughts passed easily into her mind. "How did you...?"
"Do it? I don't know." His tone held an anguish she could feel to her bones.
"It's not the end of the world."
He unfolded himself, bracing his elbows on his knees and rubbing his face. "Angel, you don't understand..."
"I don't have to," she replied softly, "I can feel what you've done. Intentionally or not, you've somehow re-enforced a bond that was between us before. A..."
"Force Link. It's the same thing I have with Obi-Wan, only it's not nearly this strong. I think this is what they call a Life Bond."
She reached out and, ignoring his warning, took his hands, forcing him to look at her, "Is there some way to shield our thoughts from each other, my love?"
He blinked at her. She knew. She'd seen it in his eyes, heard it in his thoughts. She'd read him like a book and she knew how he felt about her. And yet... he read the same things in her, the same yearning, the same desire for acceptance and love. A smile came into his eyes as he caressed her hands, "You love me."
She nodded, even though it wasn't a question, "As you do me."
He searched her eyes, silently asking her for permission. And she nodded, a shy smile lighting her face. She let her eyes flutter closed as his face came towards hers, their lips gently touching, hesitantly at first, then sliding together more firmly as he reached up to cradle the back of her head. She moaned softly as he pulled her towards him. Her hands slid up his back, holding him close before he finally, slowly pulled away. Her whole body was teeming with energy, with excitement. With the unfulfilled promise in his touch, his kiss... and his thoughts. Blue eyes met brown, the smile they shared being tender.
"Your first kiss too? And I thought this older woman of mine would be so worldly." He teased softly, gently stroking her face, "That was amazing Ami, thank you."
She looked at him, memorizing his face, "When did you grow up to be such a handsome young man?" she asked him softly, "And why didn't some other young woman try and steal you away?"
"Oh, but they did." He winked at her, "You've had my heart from the beginning; since the day I first met you in Watto's shop. They were no match for my Angel."
She blushed softly, feeling the strength of his feelings, the purity, "Whatever did I do to deserve you?"
"I think that's my line, Ami," he grinned at her.
"You accepted me, Anakin. As the handmaiden before you knew I was Queen. You saw me for me, not the mask I wear."
He took her hand and placed it over his heart, "As you did with me, Angel. The slave boy who could do more, be more, than what he was."
She slid into his lap and rested her head on his chest, hearing his heartbeat, "And look what you've become. Ani?"
"Yes love?"
"How come I can't hear what you're thinking anymore?"
He frowned, gently stroking her hair, "Nor I you. Open your mind, consciously try, I'll do the same."
She closed her eyes, listening to his heartbeat. Suddenly his warmth enveloped her, his mind wrapping around hers and she smiled. *Hello, my love, my Jedi.*
*Hello Angel.*
*Anakin!*
They both jerked, hearing Obi-Wan's sharp command loud as if spoken. Their eyes flew open and she pulled away, "Your master is calling, I shouldn't monopolize you like this."
He got to his feet as she did, looking down into her angelic face, "Monopolize me all you like, I would have it no other way with you. I'm afraid I have to go see what my Master wants, but if you have need of me, call. I'll be here."
She smiled at him, reaching up to gently grasp his Padawan braid, looking into his eyes, "I'll be waiting for you, Anakin, let me know when you're finished."
He dropped a light kiss on the tip of her nose, "The second I'm through you'll be the first to know."
Chapter 3
She led him with a few discreet pushes and pulls through the halls until they reached the upper floors of the Palace. She glanced both ways before pressing her thumb to the lock on her chambers and the door slid open. Her stomach in knots, unsure of why she'd brought him here, she led him through and locked it behind her.
Her room was more a connection of three rooms. A large dressing room, a day room with a huge desk, her wardrobe along the connecting wall to her bedroom, and assorted furniture. A table with four chairs, a sofa and chair were just a few of the fixtures. A huge balcony let her view both the palace gardens and the city below. Her bedroom was to the right, the refresher tucked in the back corner. Everything was neat and tidy, save for her desk.
She turned to look at him, suddenly nervous.
He looked around briefly before gazing down at her. A blush stained her cheeks as she looked up at him, her eyes wide. He could tell she was unsure of what she'd just done. He smiled at her and pulled her into his arms, tucking her under his chin. "I've missed you," he told her softly as she slid her arms around his waist. He leaned back against the door and held her gently, but firmly, ducking his head and inhaling the scent of her hair. Addicting like glitterstim, it held it's own fresh, cloying scent. "You smell like the wind and the rain, Padmé." He told her softly, his breath sliding over her ear.
She shuddered in his grasp, "Oh Ani," she whispered softly, hugging him tightly. He hugged her back, reluctantly letting her go when she finally stepped away. "I've missed you too. Look at us, you'd think we hadn't seen each other in years or something. Sit," she waved him to a seat and he stretched out on the couch as she took a seat at the other end, curling her legs up and wrapping her arms around them, looking at him, "So tell me, what's it like learning to be a Jedi? We haven't talked, and even then it was for so short a time, in three years."
He hesitated, "I'm not sure if I'm supposed to talk about it. The Jedi, as I'm sure you've guessed, are very secretive about it." He met her eager gaze, "I could show you if you like."
"Show me?"
He nodded. "You'll have to trust me though, Angel."
She smiled at his nickname for her and nodded, "I do. Implicitly it would seem. How would you show me?"
He leaned forward, grasping her hands in his, "I would have to form a... a Force bond, temporary of course, between us where I could show you all I've done over the last nine years."
She raised one eyebrow, "And what would this Force bond do, other than that? Not to mention how is it done?"
"I'm not really sure," he blushed, "I've never tried it with anyone before. I know the basics of how to establish it and how to end it, but I don't know what else it might do to either you or me."
She searched his eyes, "Do you believe you can do this, Ani?"
He nodded, "I know I can, but you have to trust me completely and let me in without fighting, can you do that?"
She grinned, "I can't seem to get you out. Go ahead, try it."
He reached out to gently place his forehead against hers as she slid towards him, her legs over his lap. She closed her eyes. "What happens if this end up permanent?"
He stopped for a fraction of a second, taking a deep breath to find his concentration, "Then I'll know your every emotion, and you'll know mine. We'll be able to communicate without words..."
"So like now, only in our minds," she teased.
He chuckled softly before stretching out to find the Force surrounding him, *You always understood me best, Angel, whether or not I was speaking*
She jerked as his voice spoke softly in her mind, *Ani? Wow, even in my mind he makes me shiver.*
He chuckled softly, *I heard that, Angel. Guard your thoughts well, I'll hear anything you think while we're connected.*
She blushed, but his eyes were closed and, though he couldn't see it, he certainly felt her embarrassment. Attempting to relax her he added, *And you do the same to me, so there's nothing to be shy about.*
She giggled, relaxing in his hold as scenes started to filter through her mind. Scenes of Anakin, feelings and all, trying to meditate but being distracted by memories of his mother, his friends and most of all her. She saw him go through the trials of learning all the basic lessons Jedi learn. She smiled a little as his class in politics brought up the Trade Federation Boycott of Naboo, focusing on her role in the class. She could feel his smugness, his gratitude, as her picture was distributed. Both as a Handmaiden and as the Queen. She saw him, later that same night, frame the Handmaiden picture and place it on his bedside table.
*Do you...*
*Yes. I still have that picture*
She smiled at his response, watching him grow in his mind, seeing things from his point of view. She saw his monthly hair cut, stifling a giggle when she felt his indignation. He might have been freed, no longer a slave on Tatooine, but he was still enslaved to the Jedi's rules.
*Oh no, they're not bonds, Ani, they're-*
*-there for my protection* he finished her thought, *I know, Ami, but...*
*Ami?*
She felt his sudden shyness, *It's what I call you in my mind, Angel, when it's just you and I-*
*-which is more often than you ever thought it would be. Oh Ani, I had no idea. You can call me that you know, if you like.*
She felt his pleasure, felt him being humbled with her permission and couldn't help but marvel as his memories accelerated, racing through his lightsaber training, his frustration and desperation as he thought of his mother, Qui-Gon and finally her. His focus seemed to stay on her more often than not as the years passed. In the next hour, she saw his whole training pass before her eyes, and gained some insight as to his feelings. She saw herself as she was three years ago, felt the strength of warmth coming from him, an encompassing, unconditional acceptance and-
*That's enough*
*Wait! What is it you're not showing me?*
Amidala gasped for air as he released her, falling back against the cushions. Her vision was blurry and she blinked rapidly, trying to get her focus back. She wasn't sure, but she thought she heard him curse.
"Ani?"
He closed his eyes against the confusion rolling off her, trying to block it off. He could feel her concern, and swallowed hard. "Don't, Ami. Please."
Her vision slowly focused on him and she was alarmed to see him curled up in the corner of the couch. His face was buried in his knees and he was shaking. Alarmed she reached a hand out to him, "Anakin?"
"Don't!"
She froze. How had he known...?
"How can you ask that?" his whisper was ragged, almost painful, "I just did something I never should have done. Padmé, I'm so sorry."
She looked at him confused, dropping her hand to the couch. What had he done? What was so awful that he wouldn't look at her, wouldn't allow-
"-you to touch me." He looked up, his eyes holding a guarded, remorseful look, "I'm sorry. So sorry. I managed to forge a stronger bond than I was going to. I can hear your thoughts-"
"-And I can hear yours." Her voice was small, her eyes wide with shock as his thoughts passed easily into her mind. "How did you...?"
"Do it? I don't know." His tone held an anguish she could feel to her bones.
"It's not the end of the world."
He unfolded himself, bracing his elbows on his knees and rubbing his face. "Angel, you don't understand..."
"I don't have to," she replied softly, "I can feel what you've done. Intentionally or not, you've somehow re-enforced a bond that was between us before. A..."
"Force Link. It's the same thing I have with Obi-Wan, only it's not nearly this strong. I think this is what they call a Life Bond."
She reached out and, ignoring his warning, took his hands, forcing him to look at her, "Is there some way to shield our thoughts from each other, my love?"
He blinked at her. She knew. She'd seen it in his eyes, heard it in his thoughts. She'd read him like a book and she knew how he felt about her. And yet... he read the same things in her, the same yearning, the same desire for acceptance and love. A smile came into his eyes as he caressed her hands, "You love me."
She nodded, even though it wasn't a question, "As you do me."
He searched her eyes, silently asking her for permission. And she nodded, a shy smile lighting her face. She let her eyes flutter closed as his face came towards hers, their lips gently touching, hesitantly at first, then sliding together more firmly as he reached up to cradle the back of her head. She moaned softly as he pulled her towards him. Her hands slid up his back, holding him close before he finally, slowly pulled away. Her whole body was teeming with energy, with excitement. With the unfulfilled promise in his touch, his kiss... and his thoughts. Blue eyes met brown, the smile they shared being tender.
"Your first kiss too? And I thought this older woman of mine would be so worldly." He teased softly, gently stroking her face, "That was amazing Ami, thank you."
She looked at him, memorizing his face, "When did you grow up to be such a handsome young man?" she asked him softly, "And why didn't some other young woman try and steal you away?"
"Oh, but they did." He winked at her, "You've had my heart from the beginning; since the day I first met you in Watto's shop. They were no match for my Angel."
She blushed softly, feeling the strength of his feelings, the purity, "Whatever did I do to deserve you?"
"I think that's my line, Ami," he grinned at her.
"You accepted me, Anakin. As the handmaiden before you knew I was Queen. You saw me for me, not the mask I wear."
He took her hand and placed it over his heart, "As you did with me, Angel. The slave boy who could do more, be more, than what he was."
She slid into his lap and rested her head on his chest, hearing his heartbeat, "And look what you've become. Ani?"
"Yes love?"
"How come I can't hear what you're thinking anymore?"
He frowned, gently stroking her hair, "Nor I you. Open your mind, consciously try, I'll do the same."
She closed her eyes, listening to his heartbeat. Suddenly his warmth enveloped her, his mind wrapping around hers and she smiled. *Hello, my love, my Jedi.*
*Hello Angel.*
*Anakin!*
They both jerked, hearing Obi-Wan's sharp command loud as if spoken. Their eyes flew open and she pulled away, "Your master is calling, I shouldn't monopolize you like this."
He got to his feet as she did, looking down into her angelic face, "Monopolize me all you like, I would have it no other way with you. I'm afraid I have to go see what my Master wants, but if you have need of me, call. I'll be here."
She smiled at him, reaching up to gently grasp his Padawan braid, looking into his eyes, "I'll be waiting for you, Anakin, let me know when you're finished."
He dropped a light kiss on the tip of her nose, "The second I'm through you'll be the first to know."