Dirty Saga, a short burst of insanity
The night was dark. RRk!
"I, Nabeshin have shot the author of this fan fic for the horrid intro to the story!" Nabeshin laughed with a gun smoking in his right hand. It actually had a cigarette hanging out of the barrel.
"The hell you doing Afro boy? How can the story go on without a writer?" a red head asked from across the room.
"Uh., maybe he's not dead?" he kicked the still body without any luck reviving him.
"Looks dead to me, Nabeshin you are under arrest!" a woman with long blue black hair pulled out some handcuffs.
"Wha?" Nabeshin vanished in a puff of white smoke looking a lot like him seconds earlier, but with a tongue sticking out and an eyelid slightly lowered. His pants were also unzipped. A loud thump can be heard sounding much like the kind of thump you get when you run at light speed with your pants at your ankles.
"Hey come back here!" the two girls shouted and chased after him.
--
Roll theme music!
dododododo den!
--
"Hail Il-Palazzo-sa." Excel yelled uselessly. A door was opened most early beneath her feet.
"Ah, Hyatt, glad you are feeling well," Il-Palazzo said with a smile which coincided with a splash from far below.
"You have an assignment for only me this time?" Hyatt asked while trying to stay on her feet.
"No, just thought I let Excel play with my shark. It has a gun that can shoot laser beams tied to its head," he smiled and quickly became serious as zapping can be heard from down the hole. "It has come to my attention that two agents have been sent to take out ACROSS, you must do everything in your power to stop them!" he stood up and stretched an arm out to further show his point. Hyatt clapped happily and fell over backwards.
"Yaaaaay, Lord Il-Palazzo-samaaaa!!!" Excel claps as she reappears back on solid ground. Her outfit is in tatters. She is also missing an arm. A puchu has provided a stereo with speakers to explain the noise of clapping and promptly gets squished underfoot.
"Did you like the shark, Excel-kun?" he asked.
"Yes, but it seems that I am missing a boot! I would kindly request you send me back down there to retrieve it, oh sexy Lord Il-Palazzo-sa..," yet again a splash can be heard and lasers sounded off a moment later.
"Hyatt.,"
"Yes?" Hyatt struggled to get back on her feet.
"Very well then, here are the two ladies sent against us," Il-Palazzo watched a view screen fall from the ceiling and stop before them. The picture is of a red head and a woman with long blue hair. "They are the Lovely Angels better known as the Dirty Pair,"
"Dirty Pair? Oh so I'm not the only one who cleans bathrooms?" Excel appeared again now missing two arms. Only the great will could know how she got out of the hole. She has both boots on this time though.
"No, Excel-kun,"
"No? Oh, They are female wrestlers!"
"No, Excel-kun," Il-Palazzo has sat back down on his throne and was looking rather impatient.
"No? Oh I know they are two special agents from the Worlds Welfare Work Association better known as the 3WA. The red head is the tom-boy Kei Misaki, she's a sagitarious who loves beer and cheesecake. The other is the girlish Yuri Hino and a pisces! No wait that's not it," Excel would scratch her head, but only now realized she has no arms.
"Dissmissed," Il-Palazzo grabbed a remote control and two giant robotic arms picked up the two secret agents of Across and threw them outside. Excel got a nice oversized boot to kick her out.
--
"Come back here!" Kei shouted, her gun fired off rounds of charged energy bolts. Nabeshin dodged them effortlessly but still ran for his life down the streets of F city.
Yuri was close behind Kei, "Why'd you go and have to kill the author of this fan fic! He was cute!"
--
"So, Ha-chan! What's the mission again?" Excel walked down the street with her arms and uniform repaired most curiously.
"Two ladies have been sent to destroy Across, we must.," Hyatt falls over limply upon the ground.
"Yes, for Lord Il-Palazzo-sama I must kill those two wanna be agents! They bow down before me, kiss my shoes, then I'll ah damnit I can't think of any more stupid things to blurt out, Ha-Chan, you ok?"
Hyatt is still limp upon the ground.
"Good, dead as usual, the universe is at peace!" Excel crosses her arms confidently just as a speeding afro man runs down the street stirring up all sorts of debris. Excel promptly spins around in shock. Moments later a speeding car appeared and zips past Excel once again now drilling her into the ground.
"How the hell can he run that fast!?" Kei shouted.
"You can dissect him later, let's get him!" Yuri shouted back. A bunch of cars rammed into each other as they entered traffic.
"Huh?" Excel looks confused and jumped out of the hole she made.
"That was them," Hyatt muttered.
"Yes! Of course it was, Silver come! Oh yeah, there's no horse in this fan fic, come to think of it, there's no writer either,"
"Oh, how would you know that?" Hyatt is now sitting upon the ground looking a bit better. She whiped blood from the side of her mouth with a magically appearing hankerchief.
"I have no idea what I'm going to say next!"
"Isn't that always the case?"
"No time for that now, Ha-chan! Let's go get them!" Excel grabbed her partner and ran into the street just as a speeding bus rams into her. "Oh yeah! Much better than hailing a taxi!"
--
"Damnit! Hold still!" Kei has stood up in the car with a rocket launcher now. She fired off some shots destroying a couple buildings and dozens of cars in the process. Nabeshin continues to run at Sonic Hedgehog speeds.
"Try not to kill anyone Kei!" Yuri shouted sounding more angry than usual. She was driving the best she could.
"Hey, tell that to the afro creep!" Kei fired off another shot just missing the speeding afro.
"We're almost there!" Excel is now seated inside the bus with Hyatt leaning against the window.
A man who has been talking with the bus driver now stood up to talk to the people on the bus. "Please don't panic, there's a . ,"
"What, bomb on the bus? Lemme guess some creepy balding super villain jury- rigged a bomb underneath the bus and is watching everyone through the security camera annnnd if we go under 50 we all die!" Excel was now in a mood for trivia pursuit.
"Uh.. no.. we are going 46 miles an hour now,"
"Oh, ok that means the bomb will explode soon?"
"Fraid so,"
"Great!" Excel smiled and sweat dropped.
Nabeshin rounded a corner and zoomed down another street. The two angels slid sideways and blasted down after them. The bus sped across that street and exploded in a fiery inferno.
"The hell?" Kei looked behind her.
"What?" Yuri asked.
"I didn't do that one!" Kei searched for more cartridges.
At once two thumps can be heard in the back seat of the Angel's speeding car. One very dead Martian princess and one very unconscious mangled blonde girl. That one quickly woke up. "Hail Il-palazzo-sama!! I have survived the cheesy b rated action flick! Now I'm once again in the b rated anime! Oh wait this is a fan fic, nevermind!"
Kei turned to Yuri who passed an agreeing glance back and continued driving. "Who the hell are you?"
"I am Excel Excel of the ideal organization Across, no wait no I'm not you did not hear that. You are the lovely Angels, no wait dirty pair, no wait lovely angels, no wait um um, I am not here, I'm in your imagination! Do be do be do I'm a penguin!"
"Across eh?" Kei grabs a cartridge and locks it in place. "Hey, Yuri, mind if I shoot her?"
"No, just shut her up!"
"Alright," Kei shoved the bazooka into Excel's face and pulls the trigger promptly annihilating her and the back of the car. Hyatt lays there unfazed by the explosion next to her.
"Wow, I havn't died in a while, almost forgot what it was like!"
"No kidding." the author muttered upon floating by her.
"Hey who are you?" Excel scratches her head.
"I'm the author of this fan fic!"
"Who?"
"Richard!"
"Who?"
"Dah, I go by Urashima online!"
"Who?"
"Dammit!"
"Who?"
Stay tuned for part 2 - the author's revenge
The night was dark. RRk!
"I, Nabeshin have shot the author of this fan fic for the horrid intro to the story!" Nabeshin laughed with a gun smoking in his right hand. It actually had a cigarette hanging out of the barrel.
"The hell you doing Afro boy? How can the story go on without a writer?" a red head asked from across the room.
"Uh., maybe he's not dead?" he kicked the still body without any luck reviving him.
"Looks dead to me, Nabeshin you are under arrest!" a woman with long blue black hair pulled out some handcuffs.
"Wha?" Nabeshin vanished in a puff of white smoke looking a lot like him seconds earlier, but with a tongue sticking out and an eyelid slightly lowered. His pants were also unzipped. A loud thump can be heard sounding much like the kind of thump you get when you run at light speed with your pants at your ankles.
"Hey come back here!" the two girls shouted and chased after him.
--
Roll theme music!
dododododo den!
--
"Hail Il-Palazzo-sa." Excel yelled uselessly. A door was opened most early beneath her feet.
"Ah, Hyatt, glad you are feeling well," Il-Palazzo said with a smile which coincided with a splash from far below.
"You have an assignment for only me this time?" Hyatt asked while trying to stay on her feet.
"No, just thought I let Excel play with my shark. It has a gun that can shoot laser beams tied to its head," he smiled and quickly became serious as zapping can be heard from down the hole. "It has come to my attention that two agents have been sent to take out ACROSS, you must do everything in your power to stop them!" he stood up and stretched an arm out to further show his point. Hyatt clapped happily and fell over backwards.
"Yaaaaay, Lord Il-Palazzo-samaaaa!!!" Excel claps as she reappears back on solid ground. Her outfit is in tatters. She is also missing an arm. A puchu has provided a stereo with speakers to explain the noise of clapping and promptly gets squished underfoot.
"Did you like the shark, Excel-kun?" he asked.
"Yes, but it seems that I am missing a boot! I would kindly request you send me back down there to retrieve it, oh sexy Lord Il-Palazzo-sa..," yet again a splash can be heard and lasers sounded off a moment later.
"Hyatt.,"
"Yes?" Hyatt struggled to get back on her feet.
"Very well then, here are the two ladies sent against us," Il-Palazzo watched a view screen fall from the ceiling and stop before them. The picture is of a red head and a woman with long blue hair. "They are the Lovely Angels better known as the Dirty Pair,"
"Dirty Pair? Oh so I'm not the only one who cleans bathrooms?" Excel appeared again now missing two arms. Only the great will could know how she got out of the hole. She has both boots on this time though.
"No, Excel-kun,"
"No? Oh, They are female wrestlers!"
"No, Excel-kun," Il-Palazzo has sat back down on his throne and was looking rather impatient.
"No? Oh I know they are two special agents from the Worlds Welfare Work Association better known as the 3WA. The red head is the tom-boy Kei Misaki, she's a sagitarious who loves beer and cheesecake. The other is the girlish Yuri Hino and a pisces! No wait that's not it," Excel would scratch her head, but only now realized she has no arms.
"Dissmissed," Il-Palazzo grabbed a remote control and two giant robotic arms picked up the two secret agents of Across and threw them outside. Excel got a nice oversized boot to kick her out.
--
"Come back here!" Kei shouted, her gun fired off rounds of charged energy bolts. Nabeshin dodged them effortlessly but still ran for his life down the streets of F city.
Yuri was close behind Kei, "Why'd you go and have to kill the author of this fan fic! He was cute!"
--
"So, Ha-chan! What's the mission again?" Excel walked down the street with her arms and uniform repaired most curiously.
"Two ladies have been sent to destroy Across, we must.," Hyatt falls over limply upon the ground.
"Yes, for Lord Il-Palazzo-sama I must kill those two wanna be agents! They bow down before me, kiss my shoes, then I'll ah damnit I can't think of any more stupid things to blurt out, Ha-Chan, you ok?"
Hyatt is still limp upon the ground.
"Good, dead as usual, the universe is at peace!" Excel crosses her arms confidently just as a speeding afro man runs down the street stirring up all sorts of debris. Excel promptly spins around in shock. Moments later a speeding car appeared and zips past Excel once again now drilling her into the ground.
"How the hell can he run that fast!?" Kei shouted.
"You can dissect him later, let's get him!" Yuri shouted back. A bunch of cars rammed into each other as they entered traffic.
"Huh?" Excel looks confused and jumped out of the hole she made.
"That was them," Hyatt muttered.
"Yes! Of course it was, Silver come! Oh yeah, there's no horse in this fan fic, come to think of it, there's no writer either,"
"Oh, how would you know that?" Hyatt is now sitting upon the ground looking a bit better. She whiped blood from the side of her mouth with a magically appearing hankerchief.
"I have no idea what I'm going to say next!"
"Isn't that always the case?"
"No time for that now, Ha-chan! Let's go get them!" Excel grabbed her partner and ran into the street just as a speeding bus rams into her. "Oh yeah! Much better than hailing a taxi!"
--
"Damnit! Hold still!" Kei has stood up in the car with a rocket launcher now. She fired off some shots destroying a couple buildings and dozens of cars in the process. Nabeshin continues to run at Sonic Hedgehog speeds.
"Try not to kill anyone Kei!" Yuri shouted sounding more angry than usual. She was driving the best she could.
"Hey, tell that to the afro creep!" Kei fired off another shot just missing the speeding afro.
"We're almost there!" Excel is now seated inside the bus with Hyatt leaning against the window.
A man who has been talking with the bus driver now stood up to talk to the people on the bus. "Please don't panic, there's a . ,"
"What, bomb on the bus? Lemme guess some creepy balding super villain jury- rigged a bomb underneath the bus and is watching everyone through the security camera annnnd if we go under 50 we all die!" Excel was now in a mood for trivia pursuit.
"Uh.. no.. we are going 46 miles an hour now,"
"Oh, ok that means the bomb will explode soon?"
"Fraid so,"
"Great!" Excel smiled and sweat dropped.
Nabeshin rounded a corner and zoomed down another street. The two angels slid sideways and blasted down after them. The bus sped across that street and exploded in a fiery inferno.
"The hell?" Kei looked behind her.
"What?" Yuri asked.
"I didn't do that one!" Kei searched for more cartridges.
At once two thumps can be heard in the back seat of the Angel's speeding car. One very dead Martian princess and one very unconscious mangled blonde girl. That one quickly woke up. "Hail Il-palazzo-sama!! I have survived the cheesy b rated action flick! Now I'm once again in the b rated anime! Oh wait this is a fan fic, nevermind!"
Kei turned to Yuri who passed an agreeing glance back and continued driving. "Who the hell are you?"
"I am Excel Excel of the ideal organization Across, no wait no I'm not you did not hear that. You are the lovely Angels, no wait dirty pair, no wait lovely angels, no wait um um, I am not here, I'm in your imagination! Do be do be do I'm a penguin!"
"Across eh?" Kei grabs a cartridge and locks it in place. "Hey, Yuri, mind if I shoot her?"
"No, just shut her up!"
"Alright," Kei shoved the bazooka into Excel's face and pulls the trigger promptly annihilating her and the back of the car. Hyatt lays there unfazed by the explosion next to her.
"Wow, I havn't died in a while, almost forgot what it was like!"
"No kidding." the author muttered upon floating by her.
"Hey who are you?" Excel scratches her head.
"I'm the author of this fan fic!"
"Who?"
"Richard!"
"Who?"
"Dah, I go by Urashima online!"
"Who?"
"Dammit!"
"Who?"
Stay tuned for part 2 - the author's revenge