Hero Worship

Part Five

+ Natsu +

A/N: A shorter, but hopefully more interesting chapter. Mm. I'm going to try to finish this fic soon before I launch into my next year of schoolwork. And I expect that it might end up being my last Digimon fic. The fandom doesn't really interest me any more...I'll always love Tai and Yama but I think I'm ready to write new things. Perhaps I'll just write a nice one-shot to wrap things up though. Course I have a tendency to go back on absolutely everything I say, so chances are, I'll have ten new Digimon fics up and running this time next week. Just give me your opinions, feedback or suggestions and we'll see how it goes.

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It's weird actually, because I've always wanted to go in the janitor's closet. Just because it's something I've never done. I mean, the number of times I have been sent to fetch him to clean up some mess I've managed to make and simply had to stand outside while he muttered hatefully to himself and laboriously gathered together his mop and bucket. Then he would glare at me and slam the door pointedly behind him. 'This is my space, you are not worthy to even look in it', his eyes would say. Really friendly guy was our janitor. He would move around the school at lunchtime, patrolling and carrying a sinister broom over one shoulder. But now I've been in his private little cupboard. Score to me.

Thing is, I expect that I'll have to go in there again sometime because I didn't really see any of it when I went in there the first time. It was dark; I could have barely seen anything anyway, unless of course I had managed to find a light switch. Then there was the fact that there was a minor little completely huge and enormous distraction, which kept me from noticing anything around me.

I was walking calmly down the hall after Sociology, wondering normal things about what I was going to be eating for dinner tonight, what exactly you were supposed to do during a free period and what the hell I had done with Taichi's Biology textbook. There were students everywhere, moving on autopilot towards their last taxing lesson of the day. A sharp whistle caught my ear suddenly and caused half a dozen other students to glance round, jerked suddenly from their thoughts of homework and exams. Yamato grinned at me. He was leaning against a wall, hands thrust in his pockets and I doubled back to reach him. Every one else went back to their steady trawl.

"Alright?" I asked, as soon as I was near enough. Yamato lifted one shoulder in a half-shrug of a response. I noticed that what he was leaning against was actually not a wall at all, but a door. The all too familiar door to the janitor's closet. "Did you want something?" I asked when he didn't say anything.

"Waiting for the halls to clear out," he said simply.

"Oh. Right..."

And clear out they did, as students trailed into classrooms and doors closed behind them.

"So...what are we doing out here then?" I asked. Yamato just smiled again in that way that I didn't like. It was almost a smirk. Kind of the way a villain smiles in a movie right before he pushes the red button to blow up the world. He reached behind him and grasped the doorknob, the door clicking open as he did so. Which was weird because the janitor always locks the door to guard against nasty sticky little students. For a moment I wondered if Yamato had the same burning ambition that I had to get in there, spray paint the walls and break that stupid broom of his into a million pieces.

"Did he leave it unlocked?" I asked in disbelief.

"No."

"Oh...so...right." Figures somehow that Yamato would be able to pick a lock. When he actually managed to do it of course, I don't know. Glancing around in a careless manner, almost as if he really didn't care whether or not anyone saw and was only doing it for principal, Yamato stepped backwards into the gloom of the closet, holding the door for me. I stood and stared at him.

"Well come on then," he said with vague impatience and I took that as my cue to venture forwards, inside.

"What if he comes back?" I asked Yamato, taking a moment to glance around, allowing my eyes to become adjusted to the dim light.

"He won't. He has the afternoon off on Tuesdays," was my reply as Yamato closed the door behind me.

There was a square, grubby little skylight in the roof, holding up a dingy beam of sunlight at the centre of the closet. They call it a closet but it's more like a very small room. The lucky Janitor gets a desk in here and everything. Tiny particles of dust danced lazily in the selective light and the rest of the room was draped in concealing shadow. The bare floorboards creaked under my feet. There was almost something mystical about the whole place, it was mystical in a sinister kind of way, like walking into an old fortune-teller's shop full of crystal balls and withered hands. Not that I've ever been in a fortune-teller's shop, but I do have a TV you know. The whole place smelled of dust and pine cleaner.

I turned back to look at Yamato, I think I was going to make some comment about the fortune teller thing and just make myself look really uncool in front of him, but something in his expression stopped me from saying anything. He stepped forward, the light from the ceiling spilling over half his face in a cheerful, indulgent way, as if delighted to have something significantly more beautiful to highlight than a patch of dusty floorboards. He kept walking until we were face to face, the movement causing the sunlight to slip off his face and over his shoulder. I guess I had some kind of vague feeling of what might be about to happen but I still almost squeaked in shock when he placed his palm flat against my chest and pushed me slowly backwards until my back touched the wall.

It's not like I've NEVER been kissed before, okay? But just not properly. Well no, I mean it was properly but not...it had never been anything like big and meaningful before. Okay, the night before. The nice little kiss on the sofa? That I could handle. But honestly, I don't think that anything has ever scared me more than Yamato did there in the janitor's closet, with the sunlight glowing behind him and one hand on my chest. He is fucking scary, alright? I have seen all kinds of weird shit and none of that ever scared me so bad. And don't even TRY to tell me he isn't if you've never been on the receiving end of his 'come to bed' eyes. Well, I guess not 'come to bed' because there are no beds in janitor's closets. At least not at our school there aren't. I mean, I guess that maybe perhaps in some schools, rich schools, where there are lots of janitors. There might be beds there. But anyway, he looks at you and it's all just like suddenly there in his eyes. All the desire and passion and sexuality that has ever existed. All of it. Think what Antony must have seen when Cleopatra looked at him. Or that, what's-her-face, from American Beauty. Damn, I know I know her name...she's on my wall...

When he kissed me this time, it was nothing like the night before. This was hungry and demanding and sudden and fast and dizzying. I got the feeling that perhaps if my eyes had been open, I wouldn't have been able to focus on anything. His tongue tangled heavily with mine and his hands etched their way fluidly between the spikes of my hair. It was like drowning in champagne, being smothered by the finest silk sheets. My knees were weak and my own lips felt clumsy and inexperienced (as I guess they were) beneath his. It didn't seem to matter to him though – he could kiss good enough for the both of us.

He tore his lips suddenly from mine, giving me chance to indulge in a little breathing and continued his kisses along my chin and down my neck, his teeth coaxing what would no doubt be a series of painfully obvious marks. At the same time, I could feel his graceful fingers flicking open the buttons on my shirt with teasing slowness. His hair smelled of lemon and camomile (a smell I recognise from Jun's blonde period – don't ask) and everything was silent save for the gentle noise of Yamato's mouth and my slightly less than stable breathing. It was one of the most surreal experiences of my life. The slanting golden light, quiet shadows and the gentle warmth of the heating pipes running behind the walls made for a wonderfully romantic setting. But then there was also the fact that there were mops and buckets and stuff arranged in meticulous order around the room, which made it painfully obvious that it was really just a dingy little janitor's closet and not some rustic romantic hideaway. That knowledge just totally spoilt everything so I made the decision to just close my eyes again and ignore it.

Thing is though, with my eyes closed and nothing to look at to distract me, I always accidentally start thinking about things. Yeah, I know it's stupid. So sue me. I can't help it. So I got to thinking there in the janitor's closet about how there were probably lots of reasons out there why I should not be finding myself in this situation. The fact that I'm technically only fifteen and still horribly inexperienced, for example. Or the fact that I should really be devoting my energy to recreating my friendship with Ken. Or even the fact that Yamato was technically not my boyfriend. Technicalities, who needs them? Not me. Except one. And to be honest it bothered me enough to make my eyes snap open when I thought of it.

Janitor's closet. School. People. PEOPLE.

Fuck.

I half-heartedly reached up to catch Yamato's shoulders, trying to lean further back into the solid wall to escape his kisses.

"Yamato," I said, annoyed that my voice sounded more like a needy whine than the sharp authority that I had been going for. His eyes flicked up to catch mine anyway, pupils dilated and irises fiery even through the cold blue.

"Mm?" he purred and I found that I could barely remember what it was that I needed to say whilst trapped in his gaze. He looked gorgeous and deliciously wanton, like someone from a porno film – sluttishly accessible but at the same time totally unattainable.

"I...," I began, trying to work out what word I wanted to say next, "we're...in…a janitor's closet," I said eventually and he smirked affectionately leaning forward to nuzzle my ear.

"No shit Sherlock," he murmured against the curve of my ear before placing a gentle kiss there. I almost groaned out loud as I felt his fingers dance over the front of my pants and then up to the waistband.

"But...there's people out there..." I tried to nod in the direction of the door without actually being able to remember properly where the door actually was.

"Then you'll just have to keep quieter than usual, won't you babe?" came the husky reply next to my ear.

"But...ah!" I caught his hand suddenly as it flicked open the button at the top of my pants. "Yamato, someone might walk in and see us!" I finally managed to say in a panicky kind of voice. I felt suddenly sober at hearing that thought voiced. As if I'd just snapped out of a hazy trance or something. Yamato leaned away slightly to stare at me again. His whole face seemed to glow with lust and passion.

"You think I don't know that?" he asked breathlessly, "Dai that's the whole point!" The fingers of the hand I still held twisted and laced between mine, as his other hand slipped to my hip, pulling me away from the wall and against him as if we were dancing a feverish tango. It sent the energy of a hundred pairs of Spanish shoes charging through me. "Anyone could walk in at any second and..." he trailed off breathily and tossed his head back in hopeless desire, as if the mere thought of it was enough for him. When he looked at me again, it was his eyes that were hazy and his voice that wasn't quite steady. Feral strands of blonde hair hung in exotic disarray around his face and his lips were flushed with the heat of his own kisses.

"Just think what could happen if we were caught..."

I didn't know what the fuck to do. Here was Yamato, his expression begging something of me and me not knowing quite what it was. I felt pathetically inadequate. I couldn't even begin to match the fire he seemed to hold within him. My respect for Taichi went up yet another notch, that was for sure.

Obviously sensing that I was not going to make any kind of move to further things on my own, Yamato made a noise somewhere between arousal and frustration at the back of his throat as he tilted his head to seal his lips harshly with mine. His elegant fingers threw the white cotton that still hung around me roughly away from my shoulders and then ran down my sides, his touch seeming to sink through muscle and flesh, reaching my very bones.

The door creaked open in a harsh noise that shattered the atmosphere.

I felt my heart drop into my stomach. Yamato seemed to snap instantly away from me, his face a mask of composure, as if he'd practised this. I was all too aware of the presence of another person in the little room as I scrambled to get my shirt back on again, which was really a waste of time as whoever it was would have already been able to take in my state of complete disarray and my uneven breathing.

"Shit. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to...interrupt..." Taichi's amused voice came from the figure in the doorway.

"Tai?!" I asked, panicked, the thought occurring to me that technically he had just caught me making out with his boyfriend, and at the same time relieved that it wasn't a teacher or somebody.

"Yeah...man, you guys…" he stepped in and closed the door quickly behind him to protect against any more unwanted visitors. "Talk about kinks. What are you doing in here?" I was aware of Yamato standing a safe distance away from me as I buttoned my shirt up almost sheepishly.

"What's it to you?" Yamato said from the shadows. Taichi shrugged, smirking a little.

"I might want to come watch next time," he joked, glancing with distracted interest around the room before his gaze settled on Yamato again, who stepped forward, back into the glow of the sunlight, almost as if it was a conscious act. He knew how flattering that light was on his pale skin.

"I never give free shows. Not even for friends," he said, a look of false hostility on his features as he tilted his head haughtily.

"Damn," Taichi said. "Well, you could always sell tickets. Make a fortune." He broke into a grin. "I could be your agent!"

"No. We're good thanks." Yamato folded his arms.

"Aw, you sure?"

"Yes."

"Fine. Your loss, blondie," Taichi said good-naturedly, stepping past Yamato to peer into the dark corners of the room. "I need a broom...you see one anywhere?"

I suddenly realised that I had yet to become a part of the conversation and decided that I had better say something.

"What do you need it for?"

"To ride," came the serious answer.

"O-kay..."

"Nah. Really I accidentally knocked a whole rack of test tubes onto the floor of the chem lab. I've been sent to get something to clean it up with," Taichi said, "Man, I can't see one anywhere! What kind of janitor's closet IS this?"

"Here," Yamato's calm voice answered as he held up a broom. Taichi turned round and beamed.

"Hey thanks!" He reached out and took the broom from Yamato's hand. "Well, back to fun, fun Chemistry then!" he said with exaggerated cheerfulness. "You want me to close the door behind me, right?" He asked, as he rested a hand on the doorknob.

"No," Yamato said, surprising me, "I think we're done in here now anyway." He stepped forward and straight out the door as Tai held it open for him. Blinking, I followed.

Taichi turned to us once in the empty hallway and looked from me to Yamato. His eyes were smiling. "Now you kids behave yourself from now on," he said, a good imitation of our school principal.

"Behave? Me?" Yamato asked, widening his eyes innocently. "I'm always on my best behaviour, right Dai?" he asked sweetly, without looking at me.

"Sure you are," I replied automatically, noticing that Taichi and Yamato were actually standing quite close together considering that they were no longer a couple.

"That was your best behaviour?" Taichi asked, raising his eyebrows and leaning on the broom.

"Mm...not quite. That was just very, very good behaviour," Yamato replied in a voice that sounded almost flirtatious, "I assure you I can be even better."

Taichi grinned.

"So anyway," I heard myself say loudly before I realised I'd even opened my mouth, in a tone that basically was an order to change the subject. It was getting weird. And I was getting funny pangs of...something like jealousy, but not quite that. Yamato glanced at me and then obediently retreated and slipped a reassuring arm through mine.

"Yeah. Anyway," Taichi replied easily, seeming quite comfortable to slip into a new conversation, "Miyako said that I was supposed to ask you two if you want to come to this party she's having on Thursday night. It's a stupid day to have it if you ask me but her parents are going away so...yeah. Can you come?"

I was expecting Yamato to answer, and was kind of surprised when instead he turned to look at me expectantly, still clinging affectionately to my arm.

"Yeah...I guess we could make an appearance," I said, confidently, just like Taichi would have done. Yamato grinned.

"Make sure the red carpet's ready though," he said, leaning his head against my shoulder and folding his fingers between mine, "or we'll be turning right around and walking out again, got it?"

"I'll tell Miyako," the younger Taichi said, his eyes seeming to linger on Yamato's arm linked through mine. I felt irrationally gloating at having Yamato on MY arm before Tai looked up at me. And then it suddenly turned to guilt at the look in his eyes. I'm not good at reading emotions and expressions and stuff and I can only describe what I saw there as a sense of loss. And confusion. Like he had lost something but didn't know what it was. Or that feeling you get when you know you have forgotten something but can't remember what it is that you've forgotten.

"So...I better get back before they send out some search party or something," he said with a cheerfulness that even I could tell wasn't entirely genuine. Taichi's like me and can't hide his feelings. He held the broom up to back up his reason for leaving and then turned to walk off.

"Tai!" I blurted automatically and he stopped and looked back over his shoulder. I didn't know quite what it was that I wanted to say but I just felt weird...like I needed to do something to make things better. What could I do? Detach Yamato, hand him over to Taichi and apologise for any inconvenience? Yeah. Right.

"Good luck with getting all that cleaned up, man," I said with a grin. Taichi rolled his eyes, all traces of unhappy feelings already wiped from his own face.

"Yeah. Thanks. I'll need it," he said before walking away.

"So what now?" I asked Yamato, feeling almost relieved to be away from Taichi. He made me feel guilty. I've never been good at dealing with negative emotions. I turned my head to look at Yamato who was still staring down the corridor after Tai. He blinked and looked at me.

"Sorry...what did you say?"

"What now?"

"Let's just go home," Yamato said, unwinding his arm from mine and leaving me to follow him down the corridor in the opposite direction to the one Tai had taken.

"I thought we weren't allowed to leave during free periods?" I said questioningly, making my tone light so that it could be interpreted as a joke if it was a stupid question to ask. Yamato shrugged.

"Yeah...but if we get caught I'll just seduce the principal again and get us off the hook," he said, his face completely serious. I stopped walking and stared at him.

"That is a joke, right?"

He stared at me blankly for a moment before breaking into one of his gorgeous smiles.

"Of course, idiot. Eurgh, he's old and fat." Yamato wrinkled his nose as he pushed open the door that led outside, not holding it for me but leaving me to catch it myself. "As if."

We walked back to Yamato's house for the second night in a row and watched TV until what would have been the end of the school day, when Yamato had band practice. I was actually kind of relieved that we didn't do anything more than that. Not sure why.

A/N: Ta da. Will honestly TRY to get the next part out faster. *whines* Why can I not just sit down and write solidly forever??? Stupid life getting in my way as usual. And having said what I said at first, I really enjoyed writing this chapter a lot so I might not be a washed-up as I thought.

Oh and 'specially for babydragon who keeps asking: Of COURSE I am going to put them all back together again in the end my dear. ^_^ That's the bit I'm looking forward to most!